essay about advice from parents

My Parents Essay

500 Words Essay On My Parents

We entered this world because of our parents. It is our parents who have given us life and we must learn to be pleased with it. I am grateful to my parents for everything they do for me. Through my parents essay, I wish to convey how valuable they are to me and how much I respect and admire them.

My Strength My Parents Essay

My parents are my strength who support me at every stage of life. I cannot imagine my life without them. My parents are like a guiding light who take me to the right path whenever I get lost.

My mother is a homemaker and she is the strongest woman I know. She helps me with my work and feeds me delicious foods . She was a teacher but left the job to take care of her children.

My mother makes many sacrifices for us that we are not even aware of. She always takes care of us and puts us before herself. She never wakes up late. Moreover, she is like a glue that binds us together as a family.

Parents are the strength and support system of their children. They carry with them so many responsibilities yet they never show it. We must be thankful to have parents in our lives as not everyone is lucky to have them.

Get the huge list of more than 500 Essay Topics and Ideas

While my mother is always working at home, my father is the one who works outside. He is a kind human who always helps out my mother whenever he can. He is a loving man who helps out the needy too.

My father is a social person who interacts with our neighbours too. Moreover, he is an expert at maintaining his relationship with our relatives. My father works as a businessman and does a lot of hard work.

Even though he is a busy man, he always finds time for us. We spend our off days going to picnics or dinners. I admire my father for doing so much for us without any complaints.

He is a popular man in society as he is always there to help others. Whoever asks for his help, my father always helps them out. Therefore, he is a well-known man and a loving father whom I look up to.

Conclusion of My Parents Essay

I love both my parents with all my heart. They are kind people who have taught their children to be the same. Moreover, even when they have arguments, they always make up without letting it affect us. I aspire to become like my parents and achieve success in life with their blessings.

FAQ of My Parents Essay

Question 1: Why parents are important in our life?

Answer 1: Parents are the most precious gifts anyone can get. However, as not everyone has them, we must consider ourselves lucky if we do. They are the strength and support system of children and help them out always. Moreover, the parents train the children to overcome challenges and make the best decision for us.

Question 2: What do parents mean to us?

Answer 2: Parents mean different things to different people. To most of us, they are our source of happiness and protection. They are the ones who are the closest to us and understand our needs without having to say them out loud. Similarly, they love us unconditionally for who we are without any ifs and buts.

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31 Important Pieces Of Advice Your Parents Gave You

"Love yourself first."

BuzzFeed Staff

We asked the BuzzFeed Community to share the best piece of advice their parents ever gave them. Here are their sage words of wisdom.

Submitted by katiekat134 .

2. "If you have to continuously ask yourself if something is worth it, it's probably not."

—Submitted by Brandi Nicole Lawson via Facebook

3. "Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear."

—Submitted by Shannon Hammell via Facebook

4. "I don't care what school you go to, or what job you end up with, as long as you're doing something that makes you happy."

—Submitted by Helen Stovring via Facebook

5. With virtually no money, a week until payday, my dad came across a homeless person who was asking for money to feed his family. Without saying a word, he walked over, pulled out a $20 bill, and handed it to him. He then said to me, "If it is in your power, never refuse help to someone less fortunate."

—Submitted by jessica.lewis.319

6. "You can do anything you want, my girl."

—Submitted by Sonya Ballantyne via Facebook

7. "You can always come home."

—Submitted by Anouk van der Zee via Facebook

Submitted by brocka3 .

9. "It's a lot easier to stay out of trouble than it is to get out of trouble."

—Submitted by Peret Virkler via Facebook

10. When I was thinking about dropping out of college, my dad told me, " Don't quit until tomorrow. " I took his advice and it has helped me persevere through a post-grad degree, prolonged job searches, and marital strife, one day at a time."

—Submitted by Clara Marshall via Facebook

11. "Spend as much time as you can with loved ones, and never say good-bye without saying I love you." My mom lost her dad suddenly when she was 6, so I really get where she's coming from.

—Submitted by Jori Henry via Facebook

12. "If it was easy, everyone would do it."

—Submitted by Courtnie Love via Facebook

13. "Do what you want, but be a good person doing it."

—Submitted by Nicki Judge via Facebook

14. My amazing father used to say, "Don't let the bastards get you down." He was 100% right.

—Submitted by blaireh4655378c8

15. "If you have to convince yourself of something, the answer is probably no."

—Submitted by nataliem4bb6324eb

16. "Learn the difference between need and want, and prioritize."

—Submitted by ashn3

– Submitted by Sydney Brude.

18. "Don't do any less than what you can really do."

—Submitted by Azure Adams via Facebook

19. "Do it right the first time and you won't have to do it again."

—Submitted by annacarolinep

20. "Protect your heart."

—Submitted by brocka3

21. "No matter what job you're given, be the best you can and give your all. In all things compete against yourself. Be better than yourself the day before. You have a name — so leave your mark."

22. "You have two ears and one mouth. Listen twice as much as you speak."

—Submitted by marissad415

23. "When you are on a date (and really, any time you are meeting new people) pay attention to how they treat 'the waiter,' i.e., anyone they don't HAVE to be nice to... Just because someone is nice to you does not mean that they are a nice person. "

—Submitted by Jennifer Klumpp via Facebook

—Submitted by sammyreno

25. "Love what you do and you'll never work a day in your life."

—Submitted by heatherm486eed164

26. "It's important to remember that it's OK to be sad sometimes. No one expects you to be Mary Poppins , we understand."

—Submitted by evalikescats

27. "If you love something set it free; if it comes back then it's meant to be. But no one ever tells you how long you have to wait."

—Submitted by laylaf3

28. "Everyone poops!"

29. "'Boys are bad news, especially Blairs'" … My dad's name is Blair.

—Submitted by emmaleed4d1d2ab4a

30. "Always remember that you can."

—Submitted by christinab4f0dfac19

Submitted by Katie Mastro.

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Essay on Role of Parents in Children’s Life

Students are often asked to write an essay on Role of Parents in Children’s Life in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Role of Parents in Children’s Life

The importance of parents.

Parents play a crucial role in shaping their children’s lives. They are the first teachers and role models. Their love, care, and guidance greatly influence a child’s development.

Nurturing Values

Parents instill values and ethics in their children. They teach respect, kindness, honesty, and responsibility, shaping the child’s character and worldview.

Providing Support

Parents provide emotional, financial, and educational support. They help children navigate challenges, fostering resilience and independence.

Encouraging Dreams

Parents encourage their children’s dreams and ambitions. They provide motivation and inspiration, helping children achieve their goals.

In conclusion, parents play an irreplaceable role in children’s lives.

250 Words Essay on Role of Parents in Children’s Life

The pivotal role of parents.

Parents play a crucial role in shaping the lives of their children, serving as the primary influence and guiding light. They are the architects of a child’s early environment, nurturing and molding them into responsible adults.

Emotional and Social Development

Parents are instrumental in a child’s emotional and social development. Through their interactions, they teach children how to express emotions, communicate effectively, and form relationships. They provide the emotional security a child needs for a healthy psychological development.

Educational Guidance

Parents are the first educators. They instill the value of education, encourage curiosity, and foster a love for learning. Their involvement in a child’s academic life significantly impacts the child’s attitude towards education and their academic success.

Moral and Ethical Development

Parents play a critical role in imparting moral and ethical values. They set the standards for behavior, teaching children about honesty, respect, kindness, and responsibility. These lessons form the foundation of a child’s character.

Setting Life Goals

Parents guide their children in setting and achieving life goals. They provide advice, share experiences, and offer support, helping children navigate life’s challenges.

In conclusion, parents are the cornerstone of a child’s life. Their influence shapes a child’s personality, beliefs, and values, laying the groundwork for their future success. However, it’s important to remember that effective parenting involves a balance of guidance and allowing children to make their own decisions, fostering independence and resilience.

500 Words Essay on Role of Parents in Children’s Life

The pivotal role of parents in children’s life.

Parents play a crucial role in every stage of a child’s development, shaping their world view and preparing them for the challenges of life. Their influence extends beyond providing basic physical necessities and extends to the psychological and emotional development of the child.

Parents as First Teachers

The first education that children receive is from their parents. They learn basic skills such as talking, walking, and social interaction by observing and imitating their parents. Even before formal education begins, parents lay the foundation for cognitive development and curiosity. They introduce children to books, nature, and the world around them, fostering a love for learning.

Parents as Emotional Anchors

Parents are the primary source of emotional support for children. They help children understand and manage their emotions, fostering emotional intelligence. Through their interactions, parents teach children how to express their feelings appropriately and handle stressful situations. They also provide a safe and loving environment where children can express their feelings without fear of judgement.

Parents as Moral Guides

Parents are the first moral guides for children. They teach them the difference between right and wrong, instilling values and ethics that shape their character. Parents model behavior and attitudes that children often adopt. The values parents instill in their children, such as honesty, kindness, and respect, significantly influence their future behavior and relationships.

Parents as Role Models

Parents serve as role models, exhibiting behaviors that children tend to emulate. The way parents handle their responsibilities, treat others, and react to life’s ups and downs sets an example for children. Their actions, more than their words, have a lasting impact on a child’s behavior and attitudes.

Parents as Navigators of Socialization

Parents also play a critical role in the socialization of children. They introduce children to societal norms, expectations, and rules. Through parents, children learn how to interact with others, understand social cues, and behave in different social situations. Parents also help children develop empathy and compassion, essential for forming healthy relationships.

The role of parents in a child’s life is multifaceted and profound. They are the first teachers, emotional anchors, moral guides, role models, and navigators of socialization. The influence of parents shapes the child’s personality, behavior, and outlook towards life. As such, it is incumbent upon parents to provide a nurturing environment that promotes the overall development of the child. The importance of parents in a child’s life cannot be understated as they lay the foundation for the future of the child.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

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How to Be a Good Parent

Categories: Parenting Parents

About this sample

Words: 672 |

Published: Sep 16, 2023

Words: 672 | Page: 1 | 4 min read

1. unconditional love and support, 2. active listening, 3. setting clear boundaries, 4. leading by example, 5. encouraging independence, 6. quality time and engagement, 7. encourage learning and curiosity, 8. discipline with compassion, 9. adapt to your child's needs, 10. seek support and guidance.

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439 Parenting Essay Topics & Examples

Get a good parenting topic for any assignment – from essays to speeches – on this page.

🔮 Top 10 Parenting Topics to Write about

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Sometimes, finding the right idea is half the battle. It can be the case when it comes to writing about parenting. Topics on this subject can cover anything from parent-child relationships to children’s behavior and parenting styles. Thus, picking one good title to discuss, research, and write about can be essential. That’s why our experts have gathered this list of topics on parenting. Find your perfect idea on this page!

Discussing Boundaries with Kids.
Link Between Marriage and Children.
Choosing a Parenting Style.
When You Realize Yourself as a Parent.
Explaining Divorce to Children.
Important Aspects of Family.
How to Influence Your Teens.
Improving Parent-Child Relationships.
Steps to Adulthood.
Loveless Marriage vs. Single Parenthood.
Are Parents Responsible for Their Children’s Behavior? Consequently, parents should create time for their children in order to establish a close relationship that can have a long influence on the child’s behavior.
Are Women Better Parents Than Men? Essay Another reason why women are better parents is that they are more conscious and conscientious to the needs of their children than men.
Comparison Parenting Between Asian Parents and Western Parents Concerning authoritarian parenting, children are expected to be submissive to their parents and the demands of their parents; in this regard, the parents are supposed to be strict and emotionally detached.
Parents’ Influence on a Child Essay: How Parents Affect Behavior and Development Education level of the parents If the parents are well educated, they ought to understand the importance of education and will encourage their child to study better and up to high levels.
The Three Parenting Styles This style of parenting is where the parents let their children to make decisions on their own. The good thing about this style is the fact that communication is always open and parents are able […]
Why I Am a Good Son to My Parents The third reason why I believe I am a good son to both my parents is grounded on the fact that I have been, and will always be, a shining star in academics and extra-curricular […]
Single-Parent Families The chief materials that are to be used in the proposed experiment are the measurement scale to evaluate changes in adolescents’ attitudes towards single-parent families and the source of information about single-parent households.
Parental Care and Responsibilities In such a case, it is only logical for both parties to be involved in fending for, and taking care of the family.
Parenting Styles: Advantages and Disadvantages Kids do what they are made to do because they want to escape the punishment. As parents support children, they become independent and strong-willed.
Parents Should Spank Their Children While some parents uphold spanking as the most appropriate mode of disciplining their children, others argue that inflicting physical pain to the child can lead to negative consequences in the future. The parents should be […]
Parental Rejection and Its Severe Consequences Parental rejection can either be from a mother, a father, or a guardian. However, rejection from a mother seems to have more severe consequences of the three categories.
Role of Parents in Physical Education and Sport The involvement of parents in physical education and sports is viewed differently in regard to how it affects the child’s participation in sports even later in life.
Are Peers More Important Than Parents During the Process of Development? On the other hand, children need to understand that they are under the authority of the parents. In the life of a human being, most of his/her time is spent with peers and not the […]
Spoiled Children and Parenting Mistakes However, in order to bring a child who will earn the respect of the society at present and in the future, it is important for the parents to reverse this trend in spoiled brats by […]
Importance of Parenting Concepts In this case, the child is aware of the conflict transpiring between parents and may be torn between whom to follow and who not to.
Communication Between Parents and Teenagers Communication between parents and their children, especially teenagers, is an ongoing process that can be developed and modified in order to create a sense of openness and support that will become a basis for the […]
How Do Teenagers Deal With Problems and Consequence Without Parent’s Support? This is because the parents are not in a position to be of good guidance during the period of the problems and they are not reliable and therefore teenagers tend to rely on themselves.
How Does Society View Single Parents? A single parent refers to one who cares for one or more children without the help of one of the biological parents of the child or children. It is therefore important to note that society […]
Parental Responsibility for Crimes of Children Parents should be held responsible for the crime of their children because in most cases criminal involvement of children is the result of lack of parental control.
Personal Reflection on Parenting It is important for the parents to ensure that they are open-minded to their children. Therefore, it is important for the parents to ensure that they do not dictate everything to their children.
Parental Responsibility for Childhood Obesity It is widely known and proven by numerous studies that parents have the most significant influence on their children’s lifestyles, especially their eating habits; in addition to the fact that children copy everything their parents […]
The Role of Parents in Children’s Life The effect that was brought up in the life of Lopez is that of a person who became bitter with life and looked forward to developing the life that he would value.
Parental Hopes and Standards for Sons and Daughters However, even in a contemporary society characterized by the evolution of tolerance and equality, families have different standards for their sons and daughters that are preconditioned by the power of some stereotypical representations about female […]
The Teacher Speech With Parents These instances are broadly meant to ensure that the parents get the best understanding of the information concerning the school and more importantly enable them to fully participate in the education of their children.
Parental Issues in A Midsummer Night’s Dream: Reading the Science of Law Into a Cautious Tale About the Return Into the Lapse of Nature When Literature Meets Jurisdiction: The Mother, the Father and the Child As it has been mentioned above, the play incorporates the elements of a moral dilemma concerning who the parent of a child should be […]
Relationship Between Parents and Children The book is based on the story of a farmer and his family, who, due to the problematic nature of the head of the family, are forced to change their place of residence: “None of […]
Parents’ Duty to Monitor Children’s Online Activities Parents on the other hand should take responsibility and control the content which their kids are exposed to online so as to prevent their exploitation.
Parenting Education Programs: Pros and Cons To ensure that new pregnant couples are prepared to handle the responsibilities associated with raising kids and with helping alleviate stress and support families, it is essential that parents take parenting education programs.
Sources of Conflict Between Parents and Teenagers One of the recurrent themes linked to dress codes and the conflict between parents and adolescents is the adherence to cultural norms.
Good Parenting and Strong Social Development As a result, it is debatable whether the idea of rewarding children does or does not lead to an increase in their pro-social conduct.
What Is a Parent? In the cases wherein the egg and sperm do not come from the couple, and a surrogate is used to carry the child, who is the real parent of the child?
How Ineffective Parenting Affects a Child’s Future In addition to impairing a child’s social skills, ineffective parenting may result in a codependent relationship between a parent and their child.
The Struggles of Single Parenting The associated unavailability of proper housing, insecurity and abuse increase the influence of single-parenthood to development of a child in spite of the fact that wealth is no guarantee of positive outcome in character of […]
Respect, Honor, & Love Children for Their Parents They should never disrespect them or talk to them rudely and calmly listen to whatever they say. Children must always accompany their parents to the temples and worship wholeheartedly in front of the Gods.
Cybernetics and Parenting Styles in Family Therapy This concept will be very helpful in my future work since I will be able to notice negative behavior in children that is the result of the parenting style adopted by the parents.
The Relationship Between Parental Influence and Juvenile Delinquency Parents that do not allow their children to play with their neighbors, or discourage their children from associating with particular families lead to the children developing a negative attitude towards the families.
Authoritarian vs. Permissive Parenting Styles Authoritarian and permissive styles are parenting approaches that are commonly used and that have varied effects on children because they approach the concepts of discipline, warmth, nurturance, and communication differently.
Good Parents Traits and Raising Children – Psychology Some of the traits of a good parent include being a good listener, readiness to guide, self-discipline, setting time aside to spend with the children, and meeting the physical needs of children. In addition, good […]
Parental Involvement in Teenage Relationships Parents can monitor their child’s academic progress, engage them in conversations about romance and relationships, and give them career advice and guidance. Parental involvement in their children’s academic and social lives helps parents to understand […]
Children Mental Illness and Its Effects on Parents There is a dearth of research on the effects of childhood mental illnesses on the parents. In this view, the impact of childhood mental illnesses on the lives of the parents appears to be underestimated.
Parents’ Role in Children-Technology Relations The aim of pilot study was to apply Day in the Life as method of research to understand how young children use technology in their daily lives.
Parent-Child Relationships in “Everyday Use” by Alice Walker The more distant and fractious relationship is between the narrator and Dee. The narrator is referred to as “Mama,” and a mama she is.
Parental Involvement in Education From the analysis of the positive relation, research studies make of two-parent families and student achievement, it is correct to note that parental involvement in two-parent family setups is more preferred to single-parent family setups.
Parenting Styles and Authority Problems Authority or the right to influence the actions and opinions of other people plays an important part in many areas of our life, including the relations between a parent and a child.
Parents’ Involvement in Schoolwork Parent involvement is important in improving academic performance as students have to prove to teachers and parents that they are working hard at school.
Collectivist and Individualist Parents The grandparent’s role in a collectivist family would be similar to that of parents, and they would be expected to help with the upbringing, and children would need to bey them.
Parenting Styles and Their Influence on Adulthood The family context is regarded as essential because it helps to establish the link between childhood and the relationships of a person with their parents with future behavior and performance.
Why Are Young People Living Longer With Their Parents? When referring to a young adult, who is “living at home with their parents,” “living at parental home,” “stays with parents,” the research means that the mentioned adult is a child or a stepchild of […]
Academic Performance and Parental Influence This paper will explicate the idea that the approaches, used by Chinese mothers to foster the performance of their children in academics, are effective.
Parental Differential Treatment and Favoritism As such, parents embrace differential treatment and favoritism of children based on age of the child, gender of the child, the personality of the child, or order of birth.
How Divorce and Single Parenting Affects Children With the disturbances in the homeostatic balances in the family, there is a need to set up a new balance in at least the following important areas: The loving relationships between the single parent and […]
Adolescents’ Decision-Making and Parenting Concerns Parents are to give their children freedom of choice in love life and dating as anyway, teenagers will do whatever they want but without parental notification.
Parenting and Its Influence on Adult Children My parents have different views and character traits from my grandparents, and sometimes these contrasts cause difficulties in their relationships. Thus, love in the bonds between children and parents is essential, but it is sometimes […]
Parenting: Managing and Controlling Behavior of a Child The main objective of the author is to inform the public about the parenting needs and challenges faced by parents in bringing up children.
Single Parent and Child Language Development The first-born child in a family is more likely to have a higher chance of better language development than the remaining children that follow him.
Understanding and Addressing Family Stress: Parental Responses and Impact on Children The spousal relationship, employment, a lack of structure in the household, and psychological suffering all contribute to stress. They are regarded as potent mediators, and therefore, offending elders indicates disrespecting the father and may lead […]
Parenting Style in Japan and USA Parenting encompasses the growth ecology of a growing up child, and hence it is very important in shaping up the behavior of the child and in their physical survival, social growth, cognitive development, and emotional […]
Group Therapy for Pregnant and Parenting Teenagers It is important for the girls to understand that life still has meaning in spite of their circumstances. If the girls are able to develop a positive perception of life, they will be motivated to […]
Parents as Failed Role Models: A Doll’s House and Fight Club The drinking culture of parents revealed in the story of the Fight Club underscores the elements that increase children’s exposure to alcohol and drug taking.
Ethical Dilemma of Parental Refusal From Children’s Vaccination Kerry attempts to convince the Smiths of the relevance of vaccination in preventing infection by chronic diseases. Autonomy, beneficence, non-maleficence, and justice are ethical principles applicable in resolving the moral issue of whether or not […]
Conditioning in Parenting: Getting Kids to Do Chores One of those is an attempt to teach the child the love to the core and develop the initiative of helping with the housekeeping duties.
The Challenges of Teen Parenting: Socioeconomic Consequences and Child Development Risks This paper aims to evaluate the risks associated with teen parenting to determine whether they have a significant impact on the quality of life of parents and children.
“Blood Wedding” by F. G. Lorca and “The Metamorphosis” by F. Kafka: The Impact of Roles of Parents To compare the role of parents in the stories, we must first get a brief background of the parents in both stories.
Role of Parents in the Education of Young Children The paper will examine the role of parents in the education of young children. It is therefore, the conscientiousness of parents to provide these basic needs to their children.
Parental Non-Involvement in Children’s Education The articles under consideration reveal the problem of the involvement of parents in children’s education. The second part of the article is devoted to the ways of parents’ involvement.
Good Parent-Children Relationship Characteristics of the children compared to those of the parents can also influence the relationships between the parents and the children.
The Role of Parental Involvement in School Life The expert states the pointlessness of the argument and the joint work of the institutions that are important in the education and life of the child.
Epilepsy and Seizure Disorder: A Guide for Parents The use of electrodes is completely painless, and it allows the detection of the movement of neurons in the patient’s brain. First, a child is likely to experience challenges in learning due to seizures and […]
Hamlet’s Parental Relationships The death of his father, the actions of his mother and his existing relationship with his uncle all have Hamlet confused regarding the true nature of the world.
Children Reading Skills: Parents and Babysitters Effect This research aims to determine the role of parents and child caregivers in developing a child’s reading style; from the data to be collected and analyzed, an advisory guide to parents will be developed to […]
Cartoons, Young Children, and Parental Involvement This paper claims that parents should be more aware of the type of animations that are being watched by their children and need to become involved in their children’s cartoon experience; the following sections present […]
Four Styles of Parenting The authors continue to explain that parenting styles are affected by children’s and parents’ dispositions and mainly based on the influence of one’s culture, traditions and origins. The four types of parenting styles include Authoritarian […]
Parent-Teacher-Youth Mediation Program Analysis Firstly, the parent-child communication quality will be evaluated within the framework of the characteristics of their relationships and the ability to manage the conflicting situation.
Parenting Style and the Development First of all, the effectiveness of the authoritative style has been repeatedly confirmed in the relevant literature; in fact, it is now considered to be the most effective of the three styles.
What Is a Concept Good Parent? Overall, a good parent is a parent who can offer one’s child love and affection which is important for his or her normal development as a dignified and contented person, and is also successful in […]
Disability Equality of a Disabled Lone Parent Although the officials were initially reluctant owing to her physical condition and the nature of work she was to perform, they allowed her to try.
Parental Roles and Changes in the Last 50 Years Traditionally, it is the father’s role to provide food, shelter, and clothing to the family, while the mother takes care of the home and the children.
Parental Investment Theory In this theory, Trivers linked the levels of parental investment in their offspring with the potential of this offspring’s survival in the future, as well as the parental ability to invest in a new offspring […]
Why Chinese Parents Are Superior They deny their children many forms of popular leisure, are not shy to criticize them when they fail and drill them until they are perfect at whatever given task.’Western parents’ on the other hand, the […]
Cooperation Between Teachers and Parents To guarantee the parents’ responsiveness and interest in the children’s activities, it is necessary to inform them about all the significant events and children’s successes.
Parental Behavior in the Great Apes In contrast to chimpanzees, orangutan and gorilla newborns are less frequently separated from their mothers and have highly developed motor skills.
Impact of Free Childcare on Working Parents At the same time, having a free caregiver can improve the financial situation of parents and the child, as they can return to work.
Parental Dietary Behaviors and Children’s Eating Habits The child forms eating behavior based on the parental example and the traditions adopted in the house. I think the article is based on the theory that children tend to adopt their parents’ patterns of […]
Parenting Practices and Theories in Early Childhood While modern parenting practices and thoughts do not specify precisely how to interact with children through the ages of 6-11, they suggest that parents can develop knowledge about children’s development process.
Parenting Behaviors and Their Impact on Children The final research paper on the effect of good and bad parenting is the most important part of the portfolio. The question regarding the effects of good and bad parenting appears provocative and uncertain, and […]
Parenting: Plan for a Program Evaluation The purpose of the evaluation is to assess the changes to the parenting style of foster parents. The data collected at the end of the evaluation will provide the valuable information on the effectiveness of […]
Parenting: The Role of Socioeconomic Level and Discipline The influence of stress on discipline was modulated by the parent’s perceptions and thought functions such as concerns about the future of the child and the availability of alternative correctional tactics.
Parental Perception of Weight Management Barriers The study examined the parents’ perception on factors that contribute to childhood obesity and sort their suggestions on the possible ways of overcoming the barriers.
Society and Parenting: Survey Results Among the participants, the age group category of 30-40 was the highest, followed by 40+ years, then the 20-30 years category, and finally, the below 20 years.
Parental Knowledge, Attitudes, and Cultural Beliefs Regarding Oral Health A good understanding of parental knowledge, attitudes, beliefs, and awareness regarding oral health is important for improving health promotion efforts focused on elevating the dental health of young children.
Safety Promotion for Parents and Caregivers of Infants Recognizing and assessing the risk involved leads to the containment of the matter by identifying the plan required to promote infant safety.
Parental Education on Overweight and Obese Children The search term used includes “Effect of parental education on BMI,” “the importance of parental Education in reducing Obesity,” and “BMI, parental education, and Bodyweight”.
The Partnership With Parents and Community The relationship between parents and children is a complex system of relationships, the subject of the study of the psychology of parenthood, the purpose of which is to determine the mechanisms of the development of […]
Old-Young and Parent-Child Relationships in Early Chinese Society It is possible to apply the same principle to the relationships of the parent and the child, where the child should always respect the parent and follow their orders and advice.
“Black Parents Ask for a Second Look” by Adjei & Minka The authors claimed that the lack of understanding of the former often results in children of color being taken away from their families by Child and Family Services.
Child-Parent Relationships in Contemporary International Cinema Understanding the quality of the relationships between parents and children plays an important role in modern society, and various methods are used to deliver the message and share opinions.
Parental Role in Adolescents’ Phone Addiction In other words, the connection between the guardian and the teenagers is critical and should be maintained to allow children experience the love of their parents.
Education for Parents of Children With Cancer The hospital was selected because I am have been working there for a long time, and the personnel is willing to help me with the implementation of the process.
“Parental Characteristics and Offspring Mental Health” by Jami The title of the article is “Parental characteristics and offspring mental health and related outcomes: A systematic review of genetically informative literature”.
Teachers-Parents Partnership and Children’s Literature The literature also allows children to learn and appreciate their differences with other kids and families, facilitating the establishment and maintenance of friendship.
Parental Leaves for Both Parents in the US and Other Countries In the absence of federal paid leave policies in the U. As of 2018, in addition to the FMLA, four states had paid family leave laws in place, and three more were determined to pass […]
Minors Seeking Treatment for Sexually Transmitted Diseases Without Parental Consent Due to the severity of sexually transmitted diseases, it is very important for doctors to provide minors with the necessary care.
Parental Control as a Guarantee of Children’s Safety on the Internet Parents are liable for the safety of children on the Net and therefore are obliged to control and expand their knowledge in this field constantly.
The Four Basic Parenting Practices This type of parent listens to their children and provides love and comfort in conjunction with boundaries and reasonable chastisement. Children that have authoritarian parents are more personality and capable of thinking for themselves.
Parental Differences in Eastern and Western Cultures The main finding of this study was that children of Chinese families were better equipped for school, when the family employed greater parental involvement combined with high authoritative parenting style.
Should the Church Baptize Babies of Commited Christian Parents? One of the most common is the idea of the unity of the believers that surpass any genetic or race accessory.
Adolescent Shoplifting: Infographics for Parents The consequences of unaddressed juvenile shoplifting are the involvement of teenagers in organized theft, other serious gang activities, and placement in a youth detention center.
The Impact of Parental Incarceration and Foster Children to Delinquency It was proved that the causal relationship between events such as parental incarceration and foster care and the social phenomenon of juvenile delinquency truly exists.
Case Study: Parental Dispute The threshold criteria are the evidence and facts that are to be proven by the social services in order for the court to consider making the Care and Supervision Order.
A Generational Dance: How Parents and Kids Relate In summation, it is vital to note that the well-being and development of a child depend on the wholesome relations with their parents.
How Does Having a Child With Autism Affects Parents’ Lifestyle? The creation of a system of psychological, pedagogical and social support can reduce the risk of a complete family life dedication to a child with autism.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Parenting Style On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being lowest and 10 being highest, how much do you believe that kids need to learn early who the boss is in the family?
Parental Corporal Punishment of Young Children But did you know that the States is the only permanent and non-permanent member of the United Nations that is not a signatory to Article 19, which condemns and prohibits all forms of physical abuse […]
Parenthub as Resource for Parent-Child Relationships Building Unfortunately, not all parents understand effective methods of upbringing, do not realize the value of a favorable environment for the child’s independence, and neglect the appearance of the youth’s emotional anticipation.
How Parents of Color Transcend Nightmare of Racism Even after President Abraham Lincoln outlawed enslavement and won the American Civil War in 1965, prejudice toward black people remained engrained in both the northern and southern cultural structures of the United States.
Parenting Counseling in the New York City Community Overall, Cap4Kids has developed a wide range of resources and opportunities for children and their parents, thus, addressing the parenting issues that New York City community members are likely to experience presently.
The Relationships Between Parents and Children and Keys to Their Success The key points, which people frequently neglect, are the need for parents to be nurturers, never-ending personal development, and the risks with which the prevalence of emotional motives for parenthood is associated.
Impact of Free Childcare on Parents Willingness to Go Back to Work or College The study is unique in that it assesses the impact of free childcare in aiding parents to get back to college and work, unlike existing literature that focuses on parental return to work only.
Children and Parent’s Adjustment Process The adjustment process of new children and their parents can be challenging for them and the teacher. Inviting the parents to the classroom can help with the separation anxiety in both children and their parents.
The Experience of Parents of Children With Disabilities Enhancing support for the mental well-being of parents of children with a disability: developing a resource based on the perspectives of parents and professionals.
“Home, School, and Community Relations”: The Complex Role Nature of Parenting However, emphasizing work sometimes leads to a lack of attention to the educator’s role, which can also hurt a child. From my perspective, such behavior is a warning signal, which has to be taken seriously […]
The Sandwich Generation: Caring for Children and Parents The definition indicates a person “sandwiched” between managing the responsibilities of a parent and a caring child at the same time.
Raising the Standards for Children of Incarcerated Parents The sources of their hardships extend to social, economic, and emotional levels, and it is up to the community to recognize that and affect change by advocating for appropriate programs, policies, and practices.
The Relationship Between Single-Parent Households and Poverty The given literature review will primarily focus on the theoretical and empirical aspects of the relationship between single-parent households and poverty, as well as the implications of the latter on mental health issues, such as […]
Parental Intervention on Self-Management of an Adolescent With Diabetes Diabetes development and exposure are strongly tied to lifestyle, and the increasing incidents rate emphasizes the severity of the population’s health problem.
The Difference in Parenting an Adolescent Similarly, the father, who appears to be a disconnected and distant parent, has to support the mother and the child psychologically bonded to their adolescent to improve parenting.
Parenting Models in Modern Family Unit of Emigrants in the USA The fact is that the Lee family has three children, one of whom is just a baby, and the other two are studying at the moment in high school.
Empathy in Parent-Child Relationships It is the responsibility of parents to explain to their children what is right and what is wrong so that they can form their own opinion and develop a sense of self-worth.
Single, Low-Income, or Homeless Mothers’ Health and Parenting Problems To promote their wellbeing, health professionals may support homeless mothers in practices such as the use of strengths-anchored nursing, supporting ideas of good parenting, overcoming stigma, and discovering and eliminating the unsurmountable hindrances encountered within […]
Parents Who Teach Their Kids About Self-Worth Teaching their kids to be proud is essential because it can give them the strength to stand up for what is right and evaluate the situations around them with a sense of pride and self-worth.
A Quality All Parents Should Cultivate Parents should be able to show their love to their children since they are not able to express themselves when they need it most. Parents’ love for their children is unparalleled, and they need to […]
Parent-Child Relationships in Later Life My mother, in turn, seeks to demonstrate that she is not a child anymore, and the patronage of that kind insults her.
What Every New Parent Should Know Undoubtedly, the issue of preparing for the baby is essential, and it touches almost every young couple, so the majority of people are familiar with it. For instance, the conflict between the parents and their […]
Parenting Styles and Overweight Status The authoritarian parenting style has a strict disciplinarian and a high expectation of the child’s self-control from the parent but a low sensitivity.
Infantilization: Adult Children Living With Parents When the time comes to leave home, young people are petrified of the idea of living on their own and not having the same level of everyday care and support that they are used to.
Analysis of Bullying and Parenting Style Since the given topic usually refers to children and adolescents, it is evident that their parents hold a portion of responsibility because the adults affect the growth and development of young individuals.
Parent’s Right to Travel Out of the Country This paper seeks to analyze the parent’s right to travel out of the country and outlines why traveling has been an issue for the courts In the US, the Supreme Court acknowledges that every citizen […]
Parent Involvement and Student Achievement The purpose of the study is to investigate whether parental involvement plays a role in elementary school student achievement.
Autism and Vaccination Refusal Management Among Somalian Parents Somalian parents in their community in Minnesota refuse from their children being vaccinated, as they believe that vaccination causes autism.
Parents’ Immunization Decisions and Complex Issues in Toddlers The child and family health nurse can collaborate with diverse professionals, including the state’s immunization specialists, to improve the child’s health prospects while also empowering the mother to get updated information from national authorities in […]
The Home Interaction Program for Parents and Youngsters Aarash said that children’s well-being is his priority and mentioned that the family needs proper food for Hamdiya and a washing machine and iron to ensure the children look neat.
Parents’ Perception of Attending an ADHD Clinic The main principles of the clinic’s specialists should be an objective diagnosis of the neurological status of the child and the characteristics of his/her behavior, the selection of drug treatment only on the basis of […]
Assessment and Communicating With Parents Technology allows for an accurate quantitative measurement of the students’ progress. Technology helps compare and contrast the results of two assessments.
Childhood Obesity and Parental Education The thesis is as follows: parents should cooperate with local organizations to receive and provide their children with education on healthy living and the dangers of obesity because they are responsible for their children’s diet.
The Importance of Parenting Aspects First, it is essential to note the critical periods of prenatal development, when the mother and the baby are the most vulnerable.
Success: How to Parent? Therefore, it is crucial to choose a competent approach to raising a child to not injure them in this way. This will help in choosing a profession and the entire path of life.
Technology and Parenting: Gaming and Social Media The current project is a social media campaign report targeted at addressing the increased use of social media and gaming among the growing generation.
Parent-School Communication The current paper includes an interview with the school’s principal regarding the opportunities for parent-school partnership.
Positive Parenting Tips for Young Child’s Safety So to keep your child healthy and safe, the first two years of a child’s growth are very important and hence should be taken care of cautiously.
Adverse Childhood Experiences With Incarcerated Parents The Method of Data Collection: Mixed: survey and secondary data will both be utilized. The Research Design: First, there will be a survey of families in which there are incarcerated parents.
Jennifer Morse: Parents or Prisons Among the many reasons cited to have led to high the number of cases of juvenile offending is divorce and single parenthood.
Teen Pregnancy and Early Parental Care The scholars established the high value of prenatal care for the teenage mothers that was likely to save thousands of dollars invested in the newborn care and support of the pregnancies.
Parental Consent in Minors’ Abortions Thus, the parents or guardians of the teenage girl ought to be aware of the planned abortion and explain the possible consequences of abortion to the girl.
Vicarious Liability of Parents for Their Children Vicarious liability is a term used to refer to situations where parents are punished because of the offenses committed by their children.
Music in Parental Participation in Pediatric Laceration The check list forms facilitate the giving out of answers by the subjects while the tables allow for easy recording of the numerical data collection from the recorded forms, and this would translate to lessening […]
Conjugal Visits: Programs for Inmate Parents These visits are offered to inmates with the supervision of correctional officers in the prisons, “they are private meeting between inmates and their wife and during those meeting they are allowed to engage in anything […]
Care Needs of Children Whose Parents Have Incurable Cancer One of the common themes raised in the articles under consideration is anticipatory grief or the effect of forewarning of death on the children’s perception of one of their parents’ death.
Parental Agony in Natal Alienation in Chesnutt’s The Sheriff’s Children & Harper’s The Slave Mother The aim of this essay is to compare and contrast the theme of the impact of neonatal separation as presented by Chesnutt’s The Sheriff’s Children and Harper’s The Slave Mother.
Ethical Dilemma: Parental Notification The main issue that is to be addressed is that the boy asks the counselor not to notify his parents about the drug problem, but is it ethical to keep this information confidential?
Teens Talking With Their Partners About Sex: The Role of Parent Communication The MSS covers areas relevant to the study that are the communication of students with parents, sexual behavior, and communication with sexual partners.
Parent Interview: Through the Generations
“Gender Differences in Work-Family Guilt in Parents of Young Children”: Quantitative Research Critique
The Parent-Involvement Research
Toddlers and Tiaras: Have Parents Gone Too Far
“When Couples Become Parents” by Bonnie Fox
Family Systems Theory: Parenting and Family Diversity Issues
College Planning Brochure for Parents
Incarceration of a Parent or a Guardian of Recidivist
The Influence of Parents on Schoolchildren and Students
Parenting in Battered Women: The Effects of Domestic Violence
Lone Parents: Social Work and Exclusion
Gender-Schema and Social Cognitive Theory in Parenting Styles
Concern-Based Adoption Model in the Learning Process
Behavioral Parenting Training to Treat Children With ADHD
The Issue of Parents’ Censorship
Why Single Parents Should Stop Working?
Should Parents Use Monitoring Software?
Parenting Training Classes: A Psychology Experiment
Pilgrims and Puritanism Parenting
Teaching Parents of Schoolchildren on Sex and Sexuality
“Home, School and Playroom” by Claire Etaugh: The Combined Effects and Interactions Among Parental Child-Rearing Practices
Why Spanking Is Acceptable in Parenting
Parental Rights Terminating: Reasons and Procedures
Parental Rejection Effects on Homosexuals
Parents Influence Sexuality, Based on Two Novels
Parental Intervention for Abnormal Pubescence
The Relationships Between Physiotherapists and Educators, Parents, and Service Providers
Communication Plan for Students, Teachers and Parents
Fine and Lee on Psychoeducational Program for Parents
Male and Female Parents: Is There a Difference?
The Idea of Gay Parenting
Critical Issues in Education: Parenting and Its Implication on Student’s Achievement
Parenting a Child with a Disability Study Books Used in Class
A Critical Review of Corporal Punishment as a Form of Parental Discipline
Problems of Learning and Mutual Understanding of Students, Teachers and Parents
African-American Community: Parental Involvement
Parent-Child Relations in Poetry
Single Parents in the Alcoholic Classification
Parent Involvement in the Elementary School Setting
Parent-School Online Communication Platforms
Antibiotic and Analgesic Self-Medication Practices Among Parents for Childhood Problems
Parenting in “Hey, Kiddo” by Jarrett J. Krosoczka
Parental Beliefs’ Impact on Children’s Therapy
Parental Refusal of Treatment: Ethical Decision-Making
Parents’ Role in Youth Probation Outcomes
Parental Divorce and Its Impact on Teenagers
Parental Report of Vaccine Receipt in Children With Autism Spectrum Disorder
Discharging Minors in a Psychiatric Facility While Parents Feel Unsafe
Schools and Parents’ Fight Against Cyberbullying
Parenting Topic in Developmental Psychology
Low-Functioning Parents: Resolving the Issue
Parental Disclosure of Artificial Conception
Mental Illness in Children and Its Effects on Parents
Parental Responsibilities and Related Conflicts
Parenting, Child Development, and Socialization
Family, Marriage, and Parenting Concepts Nowadays
Children With Disabilities and Parental Mistreatment
Rights of Parents of Students With Disabilities
Relations of Parents and Teenagers
Parent Education and Discipline-Training Programs
Parenting Behaviors Throughout Child’s Life
Abbreviated Plans: Parent or Guardian Incarceration
The Importance of Right Parenting in America
Developing an Effective Parenting
Productive Communication With Parents
Parenting Strategies for Early Childhood Development
Parents as Teachers Program From Educator’s View
Parent Volunteering in the Early Education Centers
Disabled Child Guidance Through the Parents’ Eyes
“The Economic Benefits of Paid Parental Leave” by C. Miller
Parental Uninvolvement in Personality Development
Education Effect on Cultural Practices of Parents
Parent-Child Perceptions: Sexual Discussions
Being a Father: Parenting Roles and Experiences
Poverty in American Single-Parent Families
Grandparents as Parental Figures in Modern Families
Group Counseling for Children of Addicted Parents
Parent-Teacher Conferences and Their Forms
Child Counseling and Parenting Problems
Infant-Parent Attachment: Secure or Insecure?
The Physiological Impact of Autism on Children and Parents
Saudi Parents’ Perceptions of Early Intervention
Parenting Styles and Academic Motivation
School Communication and Interaction With Parents
Vegan Parents’ Influence on Their Children’s Diet
Children’s Right to Be Parented by the Best Parent
Computer Literacy: Parents and Guardians Role
Parenting Styles: China vs. North America
Children’s Success Requirements in Parents’ Views
Parenting Children With Learning Disabilities
Self-Concept, Parental Labeling, and Delinquency
Child Parenting Guide and Challenges
Parental Care and Its Role in Poor Families
Teacher-Parent Collaboration in Special Education
Parent-Child Relationship in Early Modern England
Parental Control and Young Adult Criminal Behavior
Young Adults Increasingly Moving in With Parents
Parental Narcissism and Adolescent Development
Parents’ Participation in Cultural Activities
Teaching Project: The Tube-Fed Children’s Parents
Why Young People Live Longer With Their Parents
Parenting, Divorce, Dating in the Dear Abby Letter
Parental Participation in Educational Activities
Parents’ Reasons Allowing Their Newborns to Die
Marital and Parental Subsystems in Family
Nuclear Family vs. Single Parenting Effects on Child
Parental Involvement and Children’s Aspirations
Emotions in Parent of a Child With Special Needs
Aljoudah School: Teachers and Students’ Parents Experiences
Adolescent Self-Perception and Parental Care
Parents and Community Involvement
Parent-Teen Relations in the United States and Denmark
Parents Challenges: Raising Bilingual Children
“Parental Choice” of Son-In-Law or Daughter-In-Law
Parental Involvement in School-To-Work Transition
Parents’ Education and Children’s Achievement
Parenting Styles of Young Adults
Parenting: Learning That an Adolescent Is Gay or Lesbian
Association of Parenting Factors With Bullying
Aspects of Parenting Infants and Toddlers
Parenting Methods: Pros and Challenges
Parent-Teacher Interaction Strategies
Parent Interview and Infant Observation
Parents’ Depression and Toddler Behaviors
Parenting and Its Major Styles
Styles of Parenting as a Psychological Strategies
Cross-Cultural Study: Parenting and Psychological Disorders in Adolescents
Parents Impact on Children Obesity – Nutrition
Children Learning Activities and Parental Involvement
Child Obesity and Parental Negligence
Parents Need Help on Snow Days
Chinese Parenting Style in Raising Successful Children
Parents Conferences Role in Education
Parenting Behavior Supporting Obesity in School-Aged Children
Children Obesity Issues and Role of Parents in It
The Lived Experiences of Native American Indian Women Parenting off the Reservation
Parents’ Involvement and Factors Important for Children’s Growth and Development
Different Parenting Styles
Suggestions for Future Strategies in Analysis of Parental Involvement in School Administration
Parenting Variables in Antenatal Education
Parent–Child and Sibling Relationships
Single Parents Raise Kids
Effective Responses to Challenging Parental Behaviors
“Dating and the Single Parent” by Ron Deal
“Dating and the Single Parent” by Deal
Designing Educational Spaces: A Birth-To-Eighteen-Year-Old Training for a Rich Parent
Parenting for Healthy Emotional Development
Should Parents Be Allowed to Choose the Characteristics of Their Children Through Genetic Manipulation?
First Time Parenting
Relationship Between Parental Involvement and Children’s Motivation
Abortion and Parental Consent
The Effects of Parental Involvement on Student Achievement
Teach Your Parents Well
How Children of Incarcerated Parents Are Affected
Parental Involvement in Adolescent’s Life: Contributing to Identity Formation
Does Parental Involvement and Poverty Affect Children’s Education and Their Overall Performance?
Problems Experienced by Children of Homosexual Parents
When Couples Become Parents
Analysis of Psychoeducational Program for Parents of Dysfunctional Backgrounds
Reflective Entry of “Trauma Through a Child’s Eyes: Awakening the Ordinary Miracle of Healing Children, Parenting and the Family Series” and “Udaan”
Helicopter Parents
Gay Marriage, Same-Sex Parenting, And America’s Children
Parents and Families as Partners
Families and Young Children: What Constitutes Effective Parental Discipline?
“Against the Grain: Couples, Gender, and the Reframing of Parenting”
Principles of Parenting in Psychology
Plans for Caring for Elderly Parents
The Development Psychology: Parents’ Probability of Having Another Children
Milwaukee Parental Choice Program
Parents Attitude Towards the Importance of Childhood Nutrition
Psychology: Parents’ Decisions on Having the Second Child
Parents Need Help: Restricting Access to Video Games
The Mothers Who Are Not Single: Striving to Avoid Poverty in Single-Parent Families
The Relationship Between Shin and His Parents. Escape From Camp 14
What Defines Parental Techniques and Strategies: The Case of Soccer Moms
Chinese Mothers and Their Incredible Parenting
How Does the Gender of Parent Matters?
A Dysfunctional Behavior Involving a Drunkard Parent
Parent Involvement Interview
Effects of Parental Promotion of the Santa Myth
Freakonomics and Parenting: A Position Paper
Social Network and Personal Loss Among Young Adults With Mental Illness and Their Parents: A Family Perspective
Parents’ Influence on the Life of the Main Characters
Harsh Parenting in Relation to Child Emotion Regulation and Aggression.
Harsh Parenting: Emotion Regulation and Aggression
Should Justin Ellsworth’s Parents Have Been Given Access to His Email?
Parent Involvement and Educational Outcomes
Gay Marriage and Parenting
Effects of a Parental Death on Younger Children
Adopted Children With Gay Parents Have Better Chances of Succeeding
How Parents in Different Cultures Scaffold Their Children’s Learning
The Impact of Media on Adolescents, and the Roles Played by School and Parents
Family Issues: Parents Should Stay at Home When They Have Babies
Parenting’s Skills, Values and Styles
Psychological Effects of Parental Employment and Early Childcare
Teenage Alcoholism: Parental Influence and How to Get Rid of Vice
Gay Parenting and the Issue of Adoption
Western and Eastern Parenting Styles
Foster Parenting Together: Foster Parent Couples
The Five Major Parenting Modes and the Most Effective Parenting Style
Parenting Techniques and Their Influences on Their Child’s Behavior and Habits
Family, Parenting and Child Conduct Problems
Social and Legal Obstacles of Gay and Lesbian Parenting
Work-Family Conflict and Mindful Parenting: The Mediating Role of Parental Psychopathology Symptoms and Parenting Stress in a Sample of Employed Parents
Parenting and Family: What’s Intergenerational Transmission
Valuable Strategies for Parenting an Impulsive Child
The Correlation Between Cyberbullying and Parenting Style, the Gender Differences in Cyberbullying
Same-Sex Couples, Adoption, and Parenting
Gender Equality and Inequality in Parenting Other Chapter
Parenting Styles According to Social Class
Authoritarian Parenting- Negative Effects of Authoritarian Parenting
The Relationship Between Teen Pregnancy and Parenting
Health and Social Services for Pregnant and High-Risk Parenting Teens
Socioeconomic Status and Parenting Styles
Different Parenting Styles and Their Effect on Children’s Behavior
Economic Deprivation, Maternal Depression, Parenting and Children’s Cognitive and Emotional Development in Early Childhood
Single Parenting Versus Double Parenting
Low-Income Single Mothers’ Community Violence Exposure and Aggressive Parenting Practices
Parenting Stress and Emotional or Behavioral Problems in Adolescents
Relationships Between Parenting Style and Self Reliance
Homeownership and Parenting Practices: Evidence From the Community Advantage Panel
Parenting Styles: Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive, and Uninvolved
Parenting and Education During Early Childhood
Effective Parenting-Early Development, Various Parenting Styles and Discipline
Implementing Parenting Programmes Across Cultural Contexts: A Perspective on the Deficit Narrative
The Social Norm for Parenting and the Three Classic Parenting Patterns
Family Income, Parenting Styles, and Child Behavioral-Emotional Outcomes
Parenting Stress Among Child Welfare Involved Families: Differences by Child Placement
Bidirectional Longitudinal Relations Between Parent and Grandparent and Co-parenting Relationships
Relationship Between Parenting Styles and Anxiety Sensitivity
Attachment Theory and Maternal Drug Addiction: The Contribution to Parenting Interventions
Ideal Family and Parenting Configurations
Social Behavior, Crime, and Poor Parenting
The Psychosocial Variables Associated With the Parenting a Child Having Special Needs
Attachment and Parental Reflective Functioning Features in ADHD: Enhancing the Knowledge on Parenting Characteristics
Adoptive Parenting and Attachment: Association of the Internal Working Models Between Adoptive Mothers and Their Late-Adopted Children During Adolescence
Does Strength-Based Parenting Predict Academic Achievement?
What Are the Different Parenting Types Used by Families?
How Does Social Class Influence Parenting and Child Development?
How Has Parenting Changed Over the Generations?
What Challenges Do Parents Face by Their Gender or Sexual Identities?
Are the Major Causes of Juvenile Crime Lack of Parenting?
How Does Culture Affect Parenting Styles?
What Are the Effect of Bad Parenting?
What Unites All Parenting Styles?
Are Testosterone Levels and Depression Risk Linked Based on Partnering and Parenting?
How Parenting Styles Around With How Culture and Religion?
When Children Rule: Parenting in Modern Families?
How Has Technology Impacted Parenting?
When Behavioral Barriers Are Too High or Low – How Timing Matters for Parenting Interventions?
Does Parenting Style Matter?
Does Mothers Self-Construal Contribute to Parenting Beyond Socioeconomic Status and Maternal Efficacy?
Who Helps With Homework? Parenting Inequality and Relationship Quality Among Employed Mothers and Fathers?
How Does Parenting Styles Influence a Child’s Development?
Does Parenting Affect Children’s Eating and Weight Status?
How Parenting Styles Affect the Psychological Growth of a Child?
Does Homosexual Parenting Have Adverse Effects?
How Different Parenting Styles Affect Children?
When Parenting Fails: Alexithymia and Attachment States of Mind in Mothers of Female Patients With Eating Disorders?
Does Authoritative Parenting Impact Juvenile Delinquency?
Why Doesn’t Single Parenting Always Mean Tough Life for Children?
Are Our Parenting Classes Needed?
Why Has Parenting Gotten More Difficult?
How Is Parenting Role and Parental Status Influence on Impatience?
What Are Parenting Styles?
How Does Gender and Sexuality Condition Influence Parenting?
Child Development Research Ideas
Attachment Theory Essay Topics
Child Abuse Essay Topics
Motherhood Ideas
Spanking Ideas
Child Welfare Essay Ideas
Surrogacy Questions
Caregiver Topics
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5 College Essay Tips for Parents

So, if you’re a parent or guardian, take heart, you have an important place in this process (even as you see your kids growing up). And high schoolers, don’t worry, we respect your space. Make sure to forward this list to mom and/or dad so that they know what to do.

1. Start early.

When you enter the insanity that is college admissions, everyone needs to be on the same page about timeline. There is A LOT of writing involved, so the earlier you get started, the better. The Common App prompts are already out so now is a great time to look them over and do some preliminary brainstorming. Parents, this could mean that you do a little nagging in the next few months, or it could mean that you help your kids get organized and protect their time by making sure their schedules are not overloaded. (Pro tip: there are only 24 hours in a day.)

2. Understand that this is a process.

As we tell our students all the time, great writing doesn’t happen overnight. It won’t happen in one sitting and it definitely won’t happen without effort. It’s important to remember this when looking over early drafts. Don’t be too hard on your college hopefuls, and don’t let them be too hard on themselves. Frustration and procrastination are often symptoms of perfectionism, and you can play a key role in helping manage stress and expectations.

3. Make yourself a resource.

Your memory is a goldmine. You remember SO MUCH that your kids may not be able to recall. Encourage them to ask you questions, to look through old photo albums with you, or to mine your memory in other ways. The kinds of details that you can recall may spark new ideas and will definitely contribute colorful details to the narrative.

4. Remember whose essay this is.

As much as you may know or remember, at the end of the day, this essay is not supposed to represent your memories or feelings or worldview. While your thoughts may be helpful during the early phases of the writing process, it’s important for you to step back as the essay develops. You know, like that time you finally let go of the bicycle seat.

5. Know when it’s time to ask for outside help.

Under the intense pressure of the college admissions process, tempers can flare and otherwise copacetic relationships can become strained. As much as parental involvement can help during the writing process, that doesn’t mean it definitely will help. Sometimes it can feel like extra pressure and scrutiny. Distance can be your friend, and there’s no shame in calling for a mediator during this trying time. That’s what we’re for. Our lines are always open.

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Written by Thea Hogarth

Category: Essay Tips

Tags: Admissions , advice , college application , college essay , common application , guidance , help , junior year , parents , tips

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Writing Compassionately about Parents

Image: silhouettes of an older couple sitting at a bus stop, seen from the back through frosted glass.

Today ’s post is by writer and editor Katie Bannon ( @katiedbannon ).

You may be familiar with the iconic opening line of Anna Karenina : “All happy families are alike. Each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”

Many of us end up writing about our family dynamics in memoir and personal essays, whether we planned to or not. Family members, for better or for worse, are endlessly fascinating. But how do we write about our uniquely dysfunctional families—and our parents, in particular—without being petty? How can we craft rich portraits that show their full, flawed humanity?

The more complex, the better.

Readers respond most to complicated characters. Try to be as balanced as possible in your portrayal of your parents. Showing their redeeming qualities alongside their shortcomings will make them read as human on the page. As a species, we are full of contradictions, and your parent characters should be too.

Remember that it’s difficult for readers to connect with characters who appear one-dimensional. If your mother or father is coming across as either wholly good or wholly bad, the reader is likely to distrust you as a narrator. Readers might wonder if you’ve done the processing necessary to come to terms with who your parents are/were, and if personal grievances are causing you to portray them unfairly.

Readers are also highly attuned to moments when the narrator wants them to see a character a particular way, rather than allowing them to form their own judgments. A one-sided portrayal of a parent won’t cause a reader to hate or love them—it will probably only make them detach from the narrative entirely. Capturing our parents’ complexity isn’t about giving them a “free pass” or sugar-coating their flaws. It’s about ensuring our readers can feel invested in them as characters, and as a result, stay engaged in the narrative as a whole.

If you’re writing about a difficult parent, consider how you might add nuance and compassion to their portrayal by asking the following questions:

What might have motivated the parent to act the way they did? Was it protectiveness? Fear? Low self-esteem?
As an adult, what do you understand about the parent that you didn’t know when you were a child?
Think about the parent’s own trauma and family history. Can you draw connections between the parent’s actions/behaviors and their own past? The ways their own parents treated them?

On the flipside, maybe you idealize a parent. Sometimes this happens once parents have passed away; grief can make it difficult for us to recognize a parent’s shortcomings. But readers distrust perfect characters—they often read as inauthentic or cartoon-like. To help dig deeper into your parent’s complexity, ask yourself the following questions:

What scares/scared this person? What is/was their greatest fear?
What do you imagine is/was their biggest regret in life?
What makes/made your parent feel embarrassed or ashamed?

Don’t tell us who your parents are. Show us instead.

Scenes allow us to watch your parents in action. We can see how they interact with you and others, observe their body language and mannerisms (biting fingernails, scowling, etc.), and hear the way they speak. Detail is at the heart of excellent character portrayals, and scenes are the perfect place to create the color and texture that brings parent characters to life.

Many of us harbor strong feelings toward our parents. This may result in a tendency to sum them up neatly in the narration: “My father was an angry man.” “My mother dealt with a lifetime of guilt.” While telling certainly has its place in memoir and personal essay, it’s often more effective to show us your parents’ personalities through scenes.

Instead of telling us your father was an angry man, show us a scene of him throwing a plate across the kitchen. Paint a picture of his anger through the details: the furrowing of his brow, the thunderous sound of the plate smashing, the way his screams echoed off the walls. A scene like this will allow readers to feel your father’s rage in a visceral, immersive way.

Showing parents in scene also helps you avoid labeling them. Labels reduce your parents to a “type,” diluting the nuance of your character portrayals. Mary Karr doesn’t call her parents “alcoholics” in her memoirs; instead, we see her pouring her parents’ vodka down the drain. Scenes and hyper-specific details are what make your parents idiosyncratic and believable to a reader.

Need help showing your parents on the page? Try this writing exercise:

Write a scene about a time you fought with or were scolded by a parent. The key here is using details to humanize the parent and show the reader the dynamic between the two of you. Play with the tension between what the character of “you ” wants in the scene, versus what the character of your parent wants. Try to include the following elements:

Your parent’s physical characteristics
Your parent’s body language (twirling hair, stiffening of the shoulders, etc.)
Your parent’s speech (word choice, tone, cadence)
Your parent’s actions and reactions
Speculation about what your parent might have wanted and/or felt in the scene (which may be in conflict with what you felt/wanted)

Use “telling details” that capture your parents’ essence.

Sometimes just one detail about a parent can speak volumes about who they are. These “telling details” could be as simple as a nervous tic, a favorite catchphrase, or the way they take their coffee. In my memoir, I describe how my father told waiters we had a show to catch (even when we didn’t) just to speed up the service. My mother insisted on standing on the outside of the group in family photos, doing her best to slip out of the photo entirely. Carefully chosen details evoke a huge amount about a parent’s life and identity.

Don’t neglect “telling” physical descriptors. Sometimes we’re so familiar with family members we don’t include the level of detail necessary for readers to see, hear, and feel them on the page. Details like how your parents dressed, the way they walked, what cherished objects they kept in their purse or wallet, can go a long way.

Which “telling details” about your parents will capture their essence on the page? Brainstorm ideas by filling in the blanks.

On a hot day, my mother/father always wore _______ and drank _______.
The object my mother/father most treasured was ______ because _______.
When we had company over, my mother/father would ________.
When my mother/father was annoyed, her/his voice would ________ and her/his face looked like ________.
Around the holidays, my mother/father would _________, but she/he would never ________.

Final thoughts

Parents have the potential to be your most vivid characters. Their nuances and contradictions provide incredibly fertile ground for writers. Still, writing compassionately about parents is no easy task. Applying character-focused craft techniques—leaning into complexity, developing scenes, and using evocative details—is crucial to making parent characters believable and engaging for the reader. Only then can we hope to bring our parents, and their humanity, to life on the page.

Katie Bannon is a writer, editor, and educator whose work has appeared in The Rumpus, ELLE Magazine, Narratively , and more. Her memoir manuscript, which charts her journey as a compulsive hair puller, was a finalist for the Permafrost Nonfiction Book Prize. A graduate of GrubStreet’s Memoir Incubator, she holds an MFA in creative nonfiction from Emerson College. She is a developmental editor who loves working with memoirists and essayists on how to write and revise their most vulnerable, taboo stories. She teaches at GrubStreet and lives in Central Massachusetts with her partner and two cats.

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Great piece. Really helpful!

I’m so glad it was useful, Ellen!

This teaching article has helped me very much. I have struggled for over a year at writing a memoir of my relationship with my father and how I have come to forgive him since his death 8 years ago. Thank you for publishing this. I am certain I will reread it several times as I work towards finishing the book.

I’m so glad to hear it helped, Elizabeth! Your story sounds really powerful — best of luck as you work toward completing the manuscript!

Thank you for this insightful post. It was exactly what I needed at this juncture in my writing. I am writing about my sister and I had completely forgotten to do a physical description. Can you believe it?

I’m so glad this was useful, Naomi! And I can absolutely believe it — it took me multiple drafts of writing about family members before I realized I’d included almost no physical description of them…it’s easy to forget to do that on the page when we can picture them so well in our own minds!

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The Best Advice My Mom Ever Gave Me

I’m currently pregnant with my first child. I’m an anxious person and I’ve been worried about countless things: Will our baby be healthy? Do we have everything we need for the nursery? Is the crib we’re looking to buy safe? Will I be a good mom?

That last worry is the one that has been dominating my mind as of late. Parenting is a tricky, complex task, and no parent is perfect. But I want to prime myself to be the best possible mom I can be. So I did some research.

In honor of Mother’s Day, I asked different people to share the best piece of advice they ever received from their mom or the motherly figure in their life.

“One of my favorite pieces of advice that my mom ever gave me is: Listen to the person’s advice who has nothing to lose or gain from your decision.”

— Charlene Bazarian; attorney; Reading, Massachusetts

“Always prepare early. Give yourself enough time so you have peace of mind and don’t have to rush.”

—Heather Watkins; disability rights advocate; Boston

“The best advice my mom ever gave me is to never look back because life only moves forward. As a person with anxiety disorders, I often get stuck in the past. Whenever I get stuck in a rut, I think of what my mom always told me, and I’m able to keep moving forward and not dwell on the past.”

—Tsvetty Kolarova; social work student; Toronto

“The one thing my mom drilled into me was to have good posture. She constantly told me to sit up straight at the dining table and not slouch while standing. As a teen, it was very annoying. But since then, I have thanked my mother countless times for this lesson.

“It seems like such a small thing, but it isn’t. I’ve read that good posture makes you more confident and more attractive, and it gives non-verbal clues to others that you are self-assured and powerful.”

—Kathleen Owens; financial advisor; Hilton Head, South Carolina

“With this being her first Mother’s Day as a new mom, I have to give credit to my beautiful wife, Lauren, for her constant reassurance that, in our journey of parenthood, it’s OK that we don’t have all the answers and mistakes are inevitable.

“As she’ll say, ‘We don’t even know what we don’t know.’ Being reminded of that regularly brings me so much relief, because I tend to put pressure on myself to do everything perfectly when it comes to our 3-month-old little girl.

“She keeps me balanced and remembering that this is a marathon, not a sprint, and the most important thing is to be loving and patient, not only with our daughter, but with ourselves.”

—Josh Ellis; SUCCESS editor in chief; Dallas

“The best piece of advice my mom ever gave me was that there is no reason to be jealous of anyone. She said, ‘You have two hands and a brain. If you want something someone else has, go out and get it on your own.’ That is how I live my life.”

—Ilena Di Toro; small business owner; Philadelphia

“ When I was a kid, we had a swimming pool in our backyard. One day, I got hurt doing a trick in the water. It was only a bruise, but I decided I was done for the day. My mom stopped me. She told me to do it again. ‘I’m too scared,’ I told her. ‘I’ll do it tomorrow.’

“‘No,’ my mom said, ‘you need to do it today because you’re scared. If you wait until tomorrow or some other day, the feeling of being scared will get bigger. And once it gets bigger, it will get harder for you to do it again.’

“I’ll never forget that advice. The more we hesitate over something, the bigger it becomes. But that’s exactly why you should do it again. Do it right away, and don’t give your brain the opportunity to turn a stumble into a setback.”

—Jandra Sutton; author; Nashville, Tennessee

“I’ve always loved my mom and she’s always been my best friend. I know that I didn’t appreciate her enough until I became a mom myself.

“When my first child was 10 days old, my mom found me hiding in my closet, crying from the exhaustion of being a new mom. She embraced me with the empathy of a friend and a mother. She told me I could do this because I have to. It may seem like tough love, but it is exactly what I needed to hear.

“As mothers, we work hard to care for and provide all of the needs of our children. It often goes unrecognized because you don’t always see moms hiding in their closets crying from the pain of trying to be everything. Instead we just do it, and we support all the awesome moms out there!”

—Lauren Cannon; SUCCESS senior digital director; Dallas

“Anytime I would be in an emotional spiral as a child, my mother would tell me, ‘Do not feed the fears.’ It serves as a reminder that we have a choice: Choose to feed logic and find a solution or choose to feed emotions and unravel.”

—Daryl Appleton; psychotherapist; New York City

“I grew up in India, and it was a completely different social platform. Being a girl was a disadvantage there. My mother gave me a lifetime of advice, but the most important thing she told me was that being a girl—being a woman—was my biggest strength and I should use it accordingly.”

—Maneet Chauhan; celebrity chef and Food Network personality; Nashville, Tennessee

“My mom puts her whole heart into everything she does. For my sisters and me. For my family. Her friends. Even strangers. I admire her for so many things, but especially her generosity.

“I know what she’s doing right now without asking: sewing. She started as soon as there was a need and she hasn’t stopped since. She is part of a mask brigade making and donating protective wear to health care workers and first responders. She’s sewn almost 500 masks since the start of this pandemic, and I know she’ll keep going as long as there are requests.

“My mom’s mission has always been to help others, and her selfless dedication to that has shown me that nothing matters quite like giving kindness. Our actions leave an impact, and we can all make a difference in this life if we just choose to look for the opportunity to help.”

—Jessica Larijani; SUCCESS director of digital content; Dallas

“The best piece of advice my mother ever gave me came as a conversation that turned into a guiding principle in my life. I remember her telling me that all she wishes for me is happiness. She said, ‘Always do what makes you truly happy, even if it goes against what others try to tell you is best for you, because only you know.’

“This—along with the understanding that this was not to be used in a selfish manner and always with the well-being of others in mind—has helped me at many points in my life.”

—Rachel Meakins; doula; Toronto

“The wisdom of my grandmother was the major influence to shift my mindset and move me toward greater self-belief. The one lesson that always stood out to me was to love myself. Her insight helped me view every failure as a learning experience and not allow fear to dictate my life. Although she’s not here physically, her spirit of determination is one of the greatest gifts she could have given me.”

—Garrett Hughes; SUCCESS director of digital marketing; Dallas

“The best piece of advice my mom ever gave me is that pain + reflection = growth. Life is a journey where you continuously evolve and become the best version of yourself. If we stay in our comfort zones and never go beyond them, we will never truly live. We are meant to experience life and the world. To shelter ourselves out of fear and cling to what we know only inhibits our growth.”

—Alex Azoury; entrepreneur; Byron Bay, Australia

“Don’t worry twice. You don’t need to worry about something you think might happen in the future—if it happens, deal with it at that time. For now, just live in the present.”

— Tania Elliott; allergist/immunologist; New York City

“From the time I was a little girl, my mom told me the story of the bumblebee. She’d tell me that the bumblebee was just a plump little bug with tiny little wings—wings that were far too small to hold him up—but regardless, he flew. She’d say that he flew because no one ever told him he couldn’t, and then she’d tell me that I was the bumblebee.

“Today, my mom still tells me the same story. A story that has led me through each and every milestone in my life. And because she believed I was the bumble bee, I did, too.”

—Madison Plott, SUCCESS multimedia content producer; Dallas

“Are you happy with who you are and your decisions? At the end of the day, you are the one and only person you have no matter what. Make sure you like yourself.”

—Lily Nielsen; secretary; Eureka, California

“Mom: ‘You’ll never be happy unless you realize you are happy right now.’ Translation: Happiness is all about perspective. If you wait for something to be perfect or just as you planned, it will never happen. Instead, focus on feeling the love and gratitude around you.”

—Charles McElroy; entrepreneur; Cincinnati

“As I experience the world for the first time with a toddler, it has given me a deeper appreciation for everything my mom did to raise me. Her love, selflessness and perseverance guide me through the stages of motherhood. She taught me to be fearless and to always be the best version of myself, qualities that I want to pass on to my children.

“She is truly a blessing to everyone she encounters by inspiring kindness and welcoming them with a humble heart. Her character will forever be a legacy I will proudly carry on, and I am so honored to be her daughter and thankful for the beautiful life she has given me.”

—Ingrid Ulloa; SUCCESS social media manager; San Antonio

“The best advice I ever received from my mom wasn’t something she said, but rather how she lives her life. She enjoys the ordinary moments. My mom loves sipping coffee in the morning and talking about the novels we’re reading. She loves to fill the bird feeder and watch all the different birds come to eat. My mom can make a bowl of popcorn and a movie into the most special occasion ever because she takes such pleasure in ordinary things.”

—Sherry Richert Belul; entrepreneur; San Francisco

“You’d think that raising nine children would try any mother’s patience on a daily basis. But my mother was a model of calm and cool. She had a quiet kindness, genuine care, love and compassion for others. I’d like to think that these are the most important lessons she taught me and my brothers and sister.”

—Hugh Murphy; SUCCESS product marketing manager; Dallas

“My mother’s advice was quite simple: ‘There will always be something.’”

— Desirée Rogers; former social secretary for President Barack Obama; Chicago

“The best piece of advice my mom ever gave me was to be kind, especially in the face of someone else’s anger. She said that kindness creates a ripple effect we often cannot see and that anger is often fear in disguise. The best way to counterbalance it is through kindness.”

—Kat Medina; writer; San Jose, California

“The best advice from my mother was: If you wouldn’t want it published on the front page of the newspaper—don’t do it. This advice has helped me both personally and in business.”

—Ineke McMahon; executive recruiter; Brisbane, Australia

“ My grandmother was a special woman. I always remember her reciting a poem she loved when I was a child: ‘The only things you need in life are this: a book, a pipe, a friend, and just a little cash to spend.’

“She didn’t smoke and neither do I, but the lesson of the poem has always stuck with me: It’s important to enjoy the simple things in life. Whenever I find myself worrying about problems I know are insignificant, I remember this little poem and it grounds me.”

—Jamie Friedlander; freelance writer; Chicago

“My mom taught me what it means to love unconditionally.

“I didn’t realize it as a kid, but now that I’m all grown up and working full time, I’m in awe of just how much my mom did for me and my siblings. Everything she did, she did for her kids and she’d stop at nothing to make sure we were happy and healthy. She never missed an event. Not a single game or recital. She was always there intentionally cheering louder than every other mom in the crowd no matter how embarrassing it was for her children. We always had dinner on the table at night and clean clothes to wear in the morning. On top of all of it, she somehow managed to work a full-time job with bosses that demanded more and more of her time.

“Here I am, age 30, no kids, a full-time job, and a consistent daily struggle to find a clean pair of pants. For the life of me, I cannot figure out how she did it all without going crazy. When I ask her how she did it, she always says the same thing: ‘I’d do anything for my children.’ That’s unconditional love. That’s my mom.”

—Blake Stepan; SUCCESS marketing specialist; Portland

Read next: 25 Mother’s Day Quotes to Express Your Love and Appreciation

Photo by @dbpicado/Twenty20.com

Jamie Friedlander

Jamie Friedlander is a freelance writer based in Chicago and the former features editor of SUCCESS magazine. Her work has been published in The Cut , VICE, Inc. , The Chicago Tribune and Business Insider , among other publications. When she's not writing, she can usually be found drinking matcha tea into excess, traveling somewhere new with her husband or surfing Etsy late into the night.

5473 Blair Road, Suite 100 PMB 30053 Dallas, TX 75231

How to Be a Good Parent

Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff

There is no one right way to be a good parent, although there are many proven ways to be a flawed one, such as abuse, neglect, or overindulgence. A key challenge is resisting the urge to manage, guide, or control kids at all times, but research suggests that parents who give their children room to explore, grow, and, importantly, fail, may be serving them better. No parent should allow kids to put their health or safety at risk, or to allow core house rules to be flouted, especially when it comes to daily home and school responsibilities. But beyond that, building a home life that provides caring, consistency, choices, and consequences should go a long way toward a child’s social, emotional, and intellectual development—which should also lead to a stronger parent-child bond and happier child-raising years for everyone involved.

A paradox of parenting is that kids typically need less from their mothers and fathers than the adults realize. What they need, though, is essential: Love, emotional security, conversation, validation, responsibilities, time outside, and opportunities to play and learn. Parents who can focus their attention on these baseline goals and avoid getting caught up in the minutiae of measuring minutes on screens or dictating which shirt gets worn to preschool, will find that they and their children will enjoy each other more , and that their kids will more quickly become comfortable with their own selves.

Daily routines, and regular rituals, can be a powerful way to bond with children and help them feel emotionally secure. Time spent each day reading together, listening to music, going outside, performing a simple chore, and especially a positive interaction to start the day and open time at bedtime to review the day and say goodnight, research finds, helps kids establish a stable, positive emotional outlook.

Research on the casual chitchat also known as banter has found that it is essential for children’s emotional development, and for their vocabulary. Informal talks with parents expand kids’ knowledge and skills, and has positive emotional and social effects that last into adulthood. Weekend plans, neighborhood news, funny memories, seasonal changes, to-do lists, dream recollections, and things that excite you are all valid topics for banter during quiet portions of the day.

There are reasons why younger kids don’t always cooperate with a parent’s requests, even if the parent doesn’t immediately recognize them as good reasons. A child deeply engaged with play, for example, may resist being called away to get dressed or come to dinner. To avoid conflict, a parent should observe what a child is involved in before demanding that they move away from it. It’s often helpful to talk to a child about what they’re doing, and even join them for a time, before requesting that they move on to a necessary task. Just five minutes of such “sensitive caregiving” can not only avoid resistance but help a child become better able to develop social competence.

Research suggests that it will. Many studies have found that dog ownership helps younger kids learn responsibility and empathy, and potentially even develop language skills. Recent research has also found that kids who live with a pet become less likely to have conduct problems or peer conflicts, with behavioral improvement averaging around 30 percent. The effect emerged simply by having a dog present in the home, and the results were even more striking when children were actively involved in walking and caring for the pet—although having a pet did not necessarily diminish the symptoms of clinically diagnosed emotional conditions.

In many cities and states, local laws prohibit children under a certain age from either staying home alone or being outside without an adult present. Many parents have protested such rules, arguing that kids entering the tween years should be allowed to be on their own if mothers and fathers determine that they’re responsible. This movement, often called free-range parenting , makes the case for overturning such laws to bring families more freedom, independence, trust, and joy, but while some municipalities have moved to amend their laws, many others have resisted.

It’s impossible for a parent to be perfect. Fortunately, it’s not that hard to be the right parent for your own child. Listening, being supportive, encouraging activity and creativity, and establishing a secure family structure all go a long way toward providing the kind of childhood that help kids thrive. Unfortunately, even in the pursuit of these goals, parents can go too far by overscheduling kids, micromanaging them, refusing to recognize learning or emotional struggles for what they are, modeling unhealthy responses to stress, violating boundaries, or criticizing kids or comparing them to others—even siblings—out of frustration.

In a word, no, and no child can be perfect, either. But parents who believe perfection is attainable, in themselves or their kids, often struggle to take any joy in their role, or to provide joy to their children. It’s easy for a parent to become self-critical and beat themselves up over opportunities they didn’t offer their kids, or for not pushing them hard enough. But an intense, overscheduled childhood may not be the right one for your child. Being a “good enough” parent , many experts suggest, is sufficient to raise children who are decent and loving, confident enough to pursue their interests, and able to fail.

It shouldn’t be. Many parents believe they should control children at all times, directing them to fit their own vision of what type of person they should become. Such parents may be shocked and angered when children resist such pushing, leading to power struggles and potentially years of conflict. Parents who instead focus on baseline expectations and standards for responsibility and routines, and stick to them, while working to understand their children’s temperament and emotional needs, can form a connection with their kids and work with them to discover and pursue their own interests.

In many families, one parent emerges as the “fun one,” or the “good cop,” with the other wedged into the role of the serious one, or the “bad cop.” Not only does this generate a potentially unhealthy family dynamic, it can also strain a couple’s relationship. Partners who discuss their values, and each other’s priorities as parents, can face their children with more confidence, divide responsibilities more evenly, and approach children with consistency.

It can be tricky for parents of young children to recognize when a child is acting out and when there is a valid reason for what appears to be unwelcome behavior. For example, a child may become overstimulated or feel rushed during a busy day; become angry because they’re hungry; struggle to express “big feelings”; react to a long period of physical inactivity with high energy and a need to play; or become frustrated by a parent’s inconsistent limits. Taking a step back to evaluate whether a child’s behavior may be caused by a factor outside their direct control can go a long way toward keeping parents from punishing children who may not deserve it.

Ideally, a responsible one. Surveys suggest that well over 90 percent of children have an online presence by age 2—often their own Instagram or Facebook accounts (created and maintained by their parents). “ Sharenting ,” or sharing news or images of a child, can provide parents with social validation and the support of an online community. But as kids enter the tween and teen years they may push back and feel exposed or embarrassed by what their parents have posted, leading to family conflict. Parents should understand the privacy settings of all their social media platforms, consider whether a particular photo may eventually embarrass a child and as kids get older, ask for their approval before sharing anything online.

When a parent is anxious or worried, a child may become anxious as well. Parents who talk about adult worries with kids, fail to model or teach coping skills, or who are unreliable or fail to keep promises, can drive anxiety in their sons and daughters. But parents who swoop in to eliminate any source of anxiety, by, for example, taking over difficult tasks, can also inadvertently raise kids who may struggle to cope with challenges or stress. Parents who make time to listen, take children’s concerns seriously, provide consistent support, step back and let kids solve problems on their own (or not), and allow ample free time for play, can help children thrive.

For more, see Children and Anxiety

Children may feel anxious in a variety of situations—at the doctor’s office, at a birthday party, before a test, or in a storm—and look to parents for help. Unfortunately, simply telling them to “calm down” likely will not work. But encouraging them to calm themselves by taking slow, deep breaths, chewing gum or singing, talking openly about their worries and naming them, or finding humor in the situation can help them get through it and be better prepared to handle future stressors.

When kids are feeling stress, parents can easily become anxious as well, but mothers and fathers should aim to avoid displaying it, or “ mood matching ,” which may only amplify a child’s stress. Keeping calm and grounded, perhaps through the application of mindfulness techniques, can help parents remain a source of support even in difficult moments.

Younger children feel emotions deeply, but their emotions may also change quickly, sometimes shocking parents and making them feel helpless. A child may have a limited ability to control their emotions, but a parent can help them develop the competence they need to manage their feelings themselves, and gain confidence and self-esteem in the process. An important step is to help children identify and talk about negative emotions like sadness or anger and not deny or suppress them.

Highly sensitive children may struggle with their feelings more than other kids, become more easily overwhelmed, or take setbacks more personally. Parents who can successfully manage their own emotions can help a sensitive child by creating a calm environment at home, maybe in one specific place; focusing on the child’s strengths while accepting their struggles as part of the mix; and working with the child to recognize their triggers and the most effective ways to respond.

Too often, children who are depressed don’t tell their parents about it; two out of three parents admit that they worry they wouldn’t recognize depression in a child , and clinicians find that children often report having symptoms for two to three years before they get help. Many kids avoid talking about depression at home because they think a parent won’t listen, will just tell them it’s temporary, or try to fix it quickly like a boo-boo. Other kids keep quiet because they want to protect their parents’ feelings. Creating a home where difficult feelings can be talked about and respected is an important step toward children feeling comfortable enough to speak about anything, including depression.

The idea of bringing a child to a psychologist is scary for many parents, but they should not see it as a personal failure but an active and positive step toward helping their child get the help they need. And as the experts on their family, parents should work to find someone they believe their child (and themselves) will be comfortable with. Parents should ask potential providers about their typical approach, how closely they involve parents in therapy, how to talk about it with their child, and how soon they should expect improvement.

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, getting college essay help: important do's and don’ts.

College Essays

If you grow up to be a professional writer, everything you write will first go through an editor before being published. This is because the process of writing is really a process of re-writing —of rethinking and reexamining your work, usually with the help of someone else. So what does this mean for your student writing? And in particular, what does it mean for very important, but nonprofessional writing like your college essay? Should you ask your parents to look at your essay? Pay for an essay service?

If you are wondering what kind of help you can, and should, get with your personal statement, you've come to the right place! In this article, I'll talk about what kind of writing help is useful, ethical, and even expected for your college admission essay . I'll also point out who would make a good editor, what the differences between editing and proofreading are, what to expect from a good editor, and how to spot and stay away from a bad one.

What Kind of Help for Your Essay Can You Get?

What's Good Editing?

What should an editor do for you, what kind of editing should you avoid, proofreading, what's good proofreading, what kind of proofreading should you avoid.

What Do Colleges Think Of You Getting Help With Your Essay?

Who Can/Should Help You?

Advice for editors.

Should You Pay Money For Essay Editing?

The Bottom Line

What's next, what kind of help with your essay can you get.

Rather than talking in general terms about "help," let's first clarify the two different ways that someone else can improve your writing . There is editing, which is the more intensive kind of assistance that you can use throughout the whole process. And then there's proofreading, which is the last step of really polishing your final product.

Let me go into some more detail about editing and proofreading, and then explain how good editors and proofreaders can help you."

Editing is helping the author (in this case, you) go from a rough draft to a finished work . Editing is the process of asking questions about what you're saying, how you're saying it, and how you're organizing your ideas. But not all editing is good editing . In fact, it's very easy for an editor to cross the line from supportive to overbearing and over-involved.

Ability to clarify assignments. A good editor is usually a good writer, and certainly has to be a good reader. For example, in this case, a good editor should make sure you understand the actual essay prompt you're supposed to be answering.

Open-endedness. Good editing is all about asking questions about your ideas and work, but without providing answers. It's about letting you stick to your story and message, and doesn't alter your point of view.

Think of an editor as a great travel guide. It can show you the many different places your trip could take you. It should explain any parts of the trip that could derail your trip or confuse the traveler. But it never dictates your path, never forces you to go somewhere you don't want to go, and never ignores your interests so that the trip no longer seems like it's your own. So what should good editors do?

Help Brainstorm Topics

Sometimes it's easier to bounce thoughts off of someone else. This doesn't mean that your editor gets to come up with ideas, but they can certainly respond to the various topic options you've come up with. This way, you're less likely to write about the most boring of your ideas, or to write about something that isn't actually important to you.

If you're wondering how to come up with options for your editor to consider, check out our guide to brainstorming topics for your college essay .

Help Revise Your Drafts

Here, your editor can't upset the delicate balance of not intervening too much or too little. It's tricky, but a great way to think about it is to remember: editing is about asking questions, not giving answers .

Revision questions should point out:

Places where more detail or more description would help the reader connect with your essay
Places where structure and logic don't flow, losing the reader's attention
Places where there aren't transitions between paragraphs, confusing the reader
Moments where your narrative or the arguments you're making are unclear

But pointing to potential problems is not the same as actually rewriting—editors let authors fix the problems themselves.

Want to write the perfect college application essay? We can help. Your dedicated PrepScholar Admissions counselor will help you craft your perfect college essay, from the ground up. We learn your background and interests, brainstorm essay topics, and walk you through the essay drafting process, step-by-step. At the end, you'll have a unique essay to proudly submit to colleges. Don't leave your college application to chance. Find out more about PrepScholar Admissions now:

Bad editing is usually very heavy-handed editing. Instead of helping you find your best voice and ideas, a bad editor changes your writing into their own vision.

You may be dealing with a bad editor if they:

Add material (examples, descriptions) that doesn't come from you
Use a thesaurus to make your college essay sound "more mature"
Add meaning or insight to the essay that doesn't come from you
Tell you what to say and how to say it
Write sentences, phrases, and paragraphs for you
Change your voice in the essay so it no longer sounds like it was written by a teenager

Colleges can tell the difference between a 17-year-old's writing and a 50-year-old's writing. Not only that, they have access to your SAT or ACT Writing section, so they can compare your essay to something else you wrote. Writing that's a little more polished is great and expected. But a totally different voice and style will raise questions.

Where's the Line Between Helpful Editing and Unethical Over-Editing?

Sometimes it's hard to tell whether your college essay editor is doing the right thing. Here are some guidelines for staying on the ethical side of the line.

An editor should say that the opening paragraph is kind of boring, and explain what exactly is making it drag. But it's overstepping for an editor to tell you exactly how to change it.
An editor should point out where your prose is unclear or vague. But it's completely inappropriate for the editor to rewrite that section of your essay.
An editor should let you know that a section is light on detail or description. But giving you similes and metaphors to beef up that description is a no-go.

Proofreading (also called copy-editing) is checking for errors in the last draft of a written work. It happens at the end of the process and is meant as the final polishing touch. Proofreading is meticulous and detail-oriented, focusing on small corrections. It sands off all the surface rough spots that could alienate the reader.

Because proofreading is usually concerned with making fixes on the word or sentence level, this is the only process where someone else can actually add to or take away things from your essay . This is because what they are adding or taking away tends to be one or two misplaced letters.

Laser focus. Proofreading is all about the tiny details, so the ability to really concentrate on finding small slip-ups is a must.

Excellent grammar and spelling skills. Proofreaders need to dot every "i" and cross every "t." Good proofreaders should correct spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and grammar. They should put foreign words in italics and surround quotations with quotation marks. They should check that you used the correct college's name, and that you adhered to any formatting requirements (name and date at the top of the page, uniform font and size, uniform spacing).

Limited interference. A proofreader needs to make sure that you followed any word limits. But if cuts need to be made to shorten the essay, that's your job and not the proofreader's.

A bad proofreader either tries to turn into an editor, or just lacks the skills and knowledge necessary to do the job.

Some signs that you're working with a bad proofreader are:

If they suggest making major changes to the final draft of your essay. Proofreading happens when editing is already finished.
If they aren't particularly good at spelling, or don't know grammar, or aren't detail-oriented enough to find someone else's small mistakes.
If they start swapping out your words for fancier-sounding synonyms, or changing the voice and sound of your essay in other ways. A proofreader is there to check for errors, not to take the 17-year-old out of your writing.

What Do Colleges Think of Your Getting Help With Your Essay?

Admissions officers agree: light editing and proofreading are good—even required ! But they also want to make sure you're the one doing the work on your essay. They want essays with stories, voice, and themes that come from you. They want to see work that reflects your actual writing ability, and that focuses on what you find important.

On the Importance of Editing

Get feedback. Have a fresh pair of eyes give you some feedback. Don't allow someone else to rewrite your essay, but do take advantage of others' edits and opinions when they seem helpful. ( Bates College )

Read your essay aloud to someone. Reading the essay out loud offers a chance to hear how your essay sounds outside your head. This exercise reveals flaws in the essay's flow, highlights grammatical errors and helps you ensure that you are communicating the exact message you intended. ( Dickinson College )

On the Value of Proofreading

Share your essays with at least one or two people who know you well—such as a parent, teacher, counselor, or friend—and ask for feedback. Remember that you ultimately have control over your essays, and your essays should retain your own voice, but others may be able to catch mistakes that you missed and help suggest areas to cut if you are over the word limit. ( Yale University )

Proofread and then ask someone else to proofread for you. Although we want substance, we also want to be able to see that you can write a paper for our professors and avoid careless mistakes that would drive them crazy. ( Oberlin College )

On Watching Out for Too Much Outside Influence

Limit the number of people who review your essay. Too much input usually means your voice is lost in the writing style. ( Carleton College )

Ask for input (but not too much). Your parents, friends, guidance counselors, coaches, and teachers are great people to bounce ideas off of for your essay. They know how unique and spectacular you are, and they can help you decide how to articulate it. Keep in mind, however, that a 45-year-old lawyer writes quite differently from an 18-year-old student, so if your dad ends up writing the bulk of your essay, we're probably going to notice. ( Vanderbilt University )

Now let's talk about some potential people to approach for your college essay editing and proofreading needs. It's best to start close to home and slowly expand outward. Not only are your family and friends more invested in your success than strangers, but they also have a better handle on your interests and personality. This knowledge is key for judging whether your essay is expressing your true self.

Parents or Close Relatives

Your family may be full of potentially excellent editors! Parents are deeply committed to your well-being, and family members know you and your life well enough to offer details or incidents that can be included in your essay. On the other hand, the rewriting process necessarily involves criticism, which is sometimes hard to hear from someone very close to you.

A parent or close family member is a great choice for an editor if you can answer "yes" to the following questions. Is your parent or close relative a good writer or reader? Do you have a relationship where editing your essay won't create conflict? Are you able to constructively listen to criticism and suggestion from the parent?

One suggestion for defusing face-to-face discussions is to try working on the essay over email. Send your parent a draft, have them write you back some comments, and then you can pick which of their suggestions you want to use and which to discard.

Teachers or Tutors

A humanities teacher that you have a good relationship with is a great choice. I am purposefully saying humanities, and not just English, because teachers of Philosophy, History, Anthropology, and any other classes where you do a lot of writing, are all used to reviewing student work.

Moreover, any teacher or tutor that has been working with you for some time, knows you very well and can vet the essay to make sure it "sounds like you."

If your teacher or tutor has some experience with what college essays are supposed to be like, ask them to be your editor. If not, then ask whether they have time to proofread your final draft.

Guidance or College Counselor at Your School

The best thing about asking your counselor to edit your work is that this is their job. This means that they have a very good sense of what colleges are looking for in an application essay.

At the same time, school counselors tend to have relationships with admissions officers in many colleges, which again gives them insight into what works and which college is focused on what aspect of the application.

Unfortunately, in many schools the guidance counselor tends to be way overextended. If your ratio is 300 students to 1 college counselor, you're unlikely to get that person's undivided attention and focus. It is still useful to ask them for general advice about your potential topics, but don't expect them to be able to stay with your essay from first draft to final version.

Friends, Siblings, or Classmates

Although they most likely don't have much experience with what colleges are hoping to see, your peers are excellent sources for checking that your essay is you .

Friends and siblings are perfect for the read-aloud edit. Read your essay to them so they can listen for words and phrases that are stilted, pompous, or phrases that just don't sound like you.

You can even trade essays and give helpful advice on each other's work.

If your editor hasn't worked with college admissions essays very much, no worries! Any astute and attentive reader can still greatly help with your process. But, as in all things, beginners do better with some preparation.

First, your editor should read our advice about how to write a college essay introduction , how to spot and fix a bad college essay , and get a sense of what other students have written by going through some admissions essays that worked .

Then, as they read your essay, they can work through the following series of questions that will help them to guide you.

Introduction Questions

Is the first sentence a killer opening line? Why or why not?
Does the introduction hook the reader? Does it have a colorful, detailed, and interesting narrative? Or does it propose a compelling or surprising idea?
Can you feel the author's voice in the introduction, or is the tone dry, dull, or overly formal? Show the places where the voice comes through.

Essay Body Questions

Does the essay have a through-line? Is it built around a central argument, thought, idea, or focus? Can you put this idea into your own words?
How is the essay organized? By logical progression? Chronologically? Do you feel order when you read it, or are there moments where you are confused or lose the thread of the essay?
Does the essay have both narratives about the author's life and explanations and insight into what these stories reveal about the author's character, personality, goals, or dreams? If not, which is missing?
Does the essay flow? Are there smooth transitions/clever links between paragraphs? Between the narrative and moments of insight?

Reader Response Questions

Does the writer's personality come through? Do we know what the speaker cares about? Do we get a sense of "who he or she is"?
Where did you feel most connected to the essay? Which parts of the essay gave you a "you are there" sensation by invoking your senses? What moments could you picture in your head well?
Where are the details and examples vague and not specific enough?
Did you get an "a-ha!" feeling anywhere in the essay? Is there a moment of insight that connected all the dots for you? Is there a good reveal or "twist" anywhere in the essay?
What are the strengths of this essay? What needs the most improvement?

Should You Pay Money for Essay Editing?

One alternative to asking someone you know to help you with your college essay is the paid editor route. There are two different ways to pay for essay help: a private essay coach or a less personal editing service , like the many proliferating on the internet.

My advice is to think of these options as a last resort rather than your go-to first choice. I'll first go through the reasons why. Then, if you do decide to go with a paid editor, I'll help you decide between a coach and a service.

When to Consider a Paid Editor

In general, I think hiring someone to work on your essay makes a lot of sense if none of the people I discussed above are a possibility for you.

If you can't ask your parents. For example, if your parents aren't good writers, or if English isn't their first language. Or if you think getting your parents to help is going create unnecessary extra conflict in your relationship with them (applying to college is stressful as it is!)

If you can't ask your teacher or tutor. Maybe you don't have a trusted teacher or tutor that has time to look over your essay with focus. Or, for instance, your favorite humanities teacher has very limited experience with college essays and so won't know what admissions officers want to see.

If you can't ask your guidance counselor. This could be because your guidance counselor is way overwhelmed with other students.

If you can't share your essay with those who know you. It might be that your essay is on a very personal topic that you're unwilling to share with parents, teachers, or peers. Just make sure it doesn't fall into one of the bad-idea topics in our article on bad college essays .

If the cost isn't a consideration. Many of these services are quite expensive, and private coaches even more so. If you have finite resources, I'd say that hiring an SAT or ACT tutor (whether it's PrepScholar or someone else) is better way to spend your money . This is because there's no guarantee that a slightly better essay will sufficiently elevate the rest of your application, but a significantly higher SAT score will definitely raise your applicant profile much more.

Should You Hire an Essay Coach?

On the plus side, essay coaches have read dozens or even hundreds of college essays, so they have experience with the format. Also, because you'll be working closely with a specific person, it's more personal than sending your essay to a service, which will know even less about you.

But, on the minus side, you'll still be bouncing ideas off of someone who doesn't know that much about you . In general, if you can adequately get the help from someone you know, there is no advantage to paying someone to help you.

If you do decide to hire a coach, ask your school counselor, or older students that have used the service for recommendations. If you can't afford the coach's fees, ask whether they can work on a sliding scale —many do. And finally, beware those who guarantee admission to your school of choice—essay coaches don't have any special magic that can back up those promises.

Should You Send Your Essay to a Service?

On the plus side, essay editing services provide a similar product to essay coaches, and they cost significantly less . If you have some assurance that you'll be working with a good editor, the lack of face-to-face interaction won't prevent great results.

On the minus side, however, it can be difficult to gauge the quality of the service before working with them . If they are churning through many application essays without getting to know the students they are helping, you could end up with an over-edited essay that sounds just like everyone else's. In the worst case scenario, an unscrupulous service could send you back a plagiarized essay.

Getting recommendations from friends or a school counselor for reputable services is key to avoiding heavy-handed editing that writes essays for you or does too much to change your essay. Including a badly-edited essay like this in your application could cause problems if there are inconsistencies. For example, in interviews it might be clear you didn't write the essay, or the skill of the essay might not be reflected in your schoolwork and test scores.

Should You Buy an Essay Written by Someone Else?

Let me elaborate. There are super sketchy places on the internet where you can simply buy a pre-written essay. Don't do this!

For one thing, you'll be lying on an official, signed document. All college applications make you sign a statement saying something like this:

I certify that all information submitted in the admission process—including the application, the personal essay, any supplements, and any other supporting materials—is my own work, factually true, and honestly presented... I understand that I may be subject to a range of possible disciplinary actions, including admission revocation, expulsion, or revocation of course credit, grades, and degree, should the information I have certified be false. (From the Common Application )

For another thing, if your academic record doesn't match the essay's quality, the admissions officer will start thinking your whole application is riddled with lies.

Admission officers have full access to your writing portion of the SAT or ACT so that they can compare work that was done in proctored conditions with that done at home. They can tell if these were written by different people. Not only that, but there are now a number of search engines that faculty and admission officers can use to see if an essay contains strings of words that have appeared in other essays—you have no guarantee that the essay you bought wasn't also bought by 50 other students.

You should get college essay help with both editing and proofreading
A good editor will ask questions about your idea, logic, and structure, and will point out places where clarity is needed
A good editor will absolutely not answer these questions, give you their own ideas, or write the essay or parts of the essay for you
A good proofreader will find typos and check your formatting
All of them agree that getting light editing and proofreading is necessary
Parents, teachers, guidance or college counselor, and peers or siblings
If you can't ask any of those, you can pay for college essay help, but watch out for services or coaches who over-edit you work
Don't buy a pre-written essay! Colleges can tell, and it'll make your whole application sound false.

Ready to start working on your essay? Check out our explanation of the point of the personal essay and the role it plays on your applications and then explore our step-by-step guide to writing a great college essay .

Using the Common Application for your college applications? We have an excellent guide to the Common App essay prompts and useful advice on how to pick the Common App prompt that's right for you . Wondering how other people tackled these prompts? Then work through our roundup of over 130 real college essay examples published by colleges .

Stressed about whether to take the SAT again before submitting your application? Let us help you decide how many times to take this test . If you choose to go for it, we have the ultimate guide to studying for the SAT to give you the ins and outs of the best ways to study.

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points? We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download them for free now:

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Experts offer four reasons why kids need to own their college essays — and one way parents can help

The day the Operation Varsity Blues admissions scandal broke, I was gutted. The news that a well-heeled cohort of parents paid eye-watering amounts of money to get their kids into brand-name universities felt acutely damaging and unfair — not only to the kids who earned their admissions offers honestly but also to those kids whose parents conned the system.

Beyond telegraphing to students that it’s okay to cheat, the message these parents sent to their children was: You know all that hard work you did in high school? None of it is good enough.

Admittedly, the college application process can be overwhelming, and kids could use some assistance navigating it all. But if the college application process feels as if it’s gotten out of hand, we parents — with our resources and connections, degrees and expectations — are at least partly to blame.

“Can we just say how crazy it is that we even have to have this conversation in the first place?” says Macy Lenox, a mom of two and an associate dean of admissions at the University of Virginia. “As a parent myself, I don’t come to this from a place of judgment but from one of understanding. We’re drowning our kids in our best intentions. We’ve lost sight of our job, which is not to be the applicant, but to be the best supporters of the applicant we can be.” This means demonstrating confidence in their abilities, Lenox says. “By doing things for them, you’re saying, I can do this better than you . Part of our job is empowering them to be advocates for themselves; to be successful in college, you’ve got to be able to use your own voice.”

Yet when we hear stories from friends or read posts on social media about all the hoop-jumping necessary to get into college these days, it’s understandably crazy-making. Even the most stalwart defenders of their kids’ independence can lose sight of the line between supporting and doing the work for them. And while most parents would rightfully balk at the idea of, say, rigging their kid’s SAT score , or Photoshopping their child’s face onto the body of an athlete in a sport their kid doesn’t play , the writing of college essays — with their lack of oversight, benchmarks or guarantees — remains a gray area.

Shawn Felton, senior director of undergraduate admissions at Cornell University, stresses how essential it is that kids don’t leapfrog over the opportunities for introspection intrinsic in writing essays. “Applying to college is a milestone marked by an applicant’s commitment to invest in further engaging, understanding and communicating themselves [to people] beyond those who have always known them,” Felton says. “Colleges ask applicants to take a look inside themselves and consider who they are and what they want. My hope is that individuals invest in better knowing themselves during this moment, and that they bring a real authenticity to communicating with colleges when writing their essays.”

Parents can, however, support their kids through this process, which includes encouraging them to do the challenging and ultimately gratifying work of telling their story on the page. Here, college admissions experts offer four reasons why parents should take a step back — and one way we can lean into the moment.

Writing their college essays helps kids gear up for success after high school . “The admission experience is a precursor to life in college — parents are not going to be there to concierge for their child,” says Rick Clark, director of undergraduate admission at Georgia Tech and author of “ The Truth About College Admission .” Clark says that the essays are the one place on the application that kids’ voices can come through: “That’s fundamentally the point of the essay — it’s important for the applicant to examine and articulate what matters to them . When parents become a second author, they rob the essay of the very thing we’re looking for, which is the student’s voice.”

“The college search itself is a learning experience, and everything changes so much from the time kids start the process to the time they enroll. In writing the essays, kids should discover something that’s important to them,” says education journalist and author of Jeff Selingo, who spent a year embedded in admissions offices at competitive colleges around the country for his book “ Who Gets in and Why?: A Year Inside College Admissions .” On a practical note, Selingo adds: “You’re going to have to be able to write when you’re in college; you might as well learn how to write now.”

Writing is therapy. “It can be frustrating to watch students grapple with their personal narratives, but when adults impose their word choices and life experiences on a student’s college essays, it sacrifices the authenticity,” says Mike Mallory, a former associate dean of admissions at U-Va. and current president and CEO of the Ron Brown Scholar Fund.

Mallory, who has been reading college essays for more than three decades, including more than 2,000 essays each year written by the high-achieving African American students who apply for the Ron Brown program, emphasizes that the exercise of telling your story is part of the coming-of-age of the college process: “ The inherent value of an essay is the opportunity for reflection and growth, and drafting essays involves a decision-making process that can be as unique as a thumbprint. When students decide on their own topic, ... it’s invariably much better than whatever someone else might come up with for them. It may not be an easy topic to write about, but if it’s yours, no one should dissuade you from writing it.”

Admissions officers know what a 17-year-old voice sounds like — and what a 47-year-old voice sounds like. “When parents overly coach or even write the essays, they usually end up trying to shoehorn their kid’s entire life into a couple of hundred words, or trying to write a list of what they think the admissions officers want to read — I started a nonprofit, I went on a service trip to fill-in-the-blank country . It’s highly mind-numbing,” Selingo says. “Admissions officers are really looking for something they can’t learn from other parts of the application, the slice-of-life stories. It’s the authenticity of the kid’s voice that makes an essay stand out. ”

UVA’s Lenox underscores this point: “The best essays are the ones where we don’t just want to admit the student, we want to take them out for coffee once they’re here. We’re not admitting academic machines — we’re admitting classmates and roommates and kids who will make thoughtful contributions to our community.”

If you write your kid’s essay, you’re depriving them of the opportunity to recognize just how much they do bring to the table. “Communicating with intent and purpose through their admission essays is a kind of writing exercise that most college applicants have not experienced,” Cornell’s Felton says. “Just like the life journeys of most college applicants are still being shaped and realized, so, too, are their communication and writing skills. When reading college application essays, we expect to see this unfinished vulnerability on display in a distinct, unique way for each applicant. It’s important for us to hear directly from each applicant about their story and how it’s going so far.”

Essays can provide a growth opportunity for parents, too. Yes, kids need to write their own essays, but they don’t have to do it alone. Whitney Soule, dean of admissions and student aid at Bowdoin College, adds that parents can help with essays by encouraging them to flesh out their thoughts and ensure clarity: “Parents can be a sounding board for an idea, asking questions that help the student develop that idea further or let them know if a description is confusing. When anyone besides the student does the writing, it actually interferes with how that picture comes together for us in admissions.”

Lenox says that the most effective editing is in questioning, not rewriting: “Parents can ask what did you mean by that? Is it clear to the audience? Polishing is clarity, not changing. Kids should be asked this many times over to ensure they’re not just throwing out an answer that they think you want to hear.”

Parents should certainly play a supporting role in perhaps the most important aspect of the college process: helping kids thrive wherever they enroll. “Parents love their kids, but your job as a parent isn’t to get your kid into a certain school,” Clark says. “Your job is to prepare them for wherever they go. Build the foundation — not just academically. Wherever they land, you want them to be successful.”

Adrienne Wichard-Edds is a writer and co-founder of www.theessaycoaches.com . Follow her on Twitter at @WichardEdds .

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Should Parents Help Students Write College Essays?

What’s covered:, how involved should parents be with college applications, 4 ways parents can help with college essays, 4 elements of a good college essay, where your student can get their essay edited.

High schoolers applying to college go through a lot—from filling out multiple applications, keeping up impressive grades and extracurriculars, and writing dozens of college essays. Parents might be tempted to help out their kids and ease some of their burden during this busy time. But, should parents help write their kids’ college essays?

When it comes to helping out with the college process, parents should act as more of a coach or cheerleader than a director. Rather than hovering over your student and telling them when to fill out certain applications, what to write in their essays, and what safety schools to apply to, take a step back and support them without smothering them.

As a coach, parents can guide their student to keep them on schedule, have productive conversations about different college options and financial aid, and offer feedback and edits on essays. It’s important that parents don’t step in and play the game for themselves, so to speak, but rather assist their kid in reaching their full potential.

Another role parents can play is the cheerleader: encourage them through this challenging time and keep them engaged even when they get burnt out. The application process isn’t easy for students or parents, but having someone in your corner to cheer you on will help motivate students to keep going.

Since parents should not be at the helm, they should not do anything active like writing essays. More importantly, a parent directly writing any part of an essay would be plagiarism, and admissions officers can pick up on it via software and their intuition. Essays must be written with the student’s authentic voice and ideas. Here are some things parents can do:

1. Proofread Drafts

Every essay a student writes will likely have to go through multiple drafts—each time tweaking grammar, cutting down words, adding details, moving around sentences, etc. Parents can help expedite this process by reading over the essay drafts and providing constructive feedback. Important details to check for include:

Are there spelling errors or typos?
Could the grammar be elevated with literary devices or different diction?
Does this sound like my student speaking or a thesaurus?
Does the essay flow in a manner that is easy to follow?

2. Brainstorm Essay Topics

Figuring out how to answer each prompt can be difficult and exhausting when students have so many essays to write. This is a good place for parents to jump in and “coach” their students; sit down for a few hours and start brainstorming topics and themes that could work for various prompts.

A good way to organize brainstorming sessions is to break down essay prompts into categories ( “Why This Major?”, “Extracurricular”, “Community Impact”, “Overcoming Challenges” , etc.) and come up with five to ten stories or answers for each category.

3. Help Students Recall Childhood Memories and Stories

Along the lines of brainstorming, parents can play a huge role in reminding their students of anecdotes from their childhood that could make for a good essay. While you shouldn’t recount stories from your point of view that would color their perspective, parents can show pictures and videos, talk through some of their fondest memories of their kids, and fill in any gaps in stories kids partially remember.

4. Help Students Reflect on Who They Are

One of the important aspects of college essays is the ability to engage in self reflection and think about your character development and growth. This can be a lot for a teenager to do on their own, so it’s a good place for parents to provide some extra support.

Walk your child through some brainstorming exercises. Ask questions like “What three words would best describe you”, “What’s a good example of how you approach a challenge/new idea/etc”, “What are your personal and career goals”, and “How have you grown as a person since you were younger” .

Another way parents can help their kids is by ensuring they cover the bases that make a good essay. Make sure to check out our ultimate guide to college essays to learn how to write a good essay, but below are a handful of the things to check for:

1. Answers the 4 Core Questions

When it comes to a strong college essay, there are four questions that should be answered. These are:

“Who Am I?”
“Why Am I Here?”
“What is Unique About Me?”
“What Matters to Me?”

These might seem like daunting philosophical questions, but with an intentional, well-crafted essay, you’ll find that the answers to these questions come naturally. Perhaps a more helpful way to look at these questions would be the following:

What are your personality traits?
What was your journey through high school? What were you interested in and found meaningful? How have you evolved as you have grown?
Between your interests, skills, way of thinking, and personality, why are you different from other applicants?
What is something you care deeply about above all else?

2. Author’s Voice is Authentic and Approachable

Essays are the one opportunity for admissions committees to hear directly from the applicant. For that reason, the essay should sound like a high school student wrote it. Without being overly casual, make sure the tone of the essay reads like a conversation with a friend.

Don’t rely too heavily on a thesaurus and don’t worry about stuffing the essay full of metaphors and figurative language—this isn’t an essay for an English class!

3. Shows Instead of Tells

While the advice to “ show not tell ” in your writing might not be new, it could not be more important. What truly sets apart a good essay from a great essay is the ability to paint a picture for the reader with imagery.

A sentence like this, “I love the thrill of competing in the Math Olympiad,” simply tells the reader what the student enjoys. However, look at the difference when a sentence shows us what a student loves: “ Badum. Badum. Badum. The heavy thumping of my heart echoed painfully in my ears as a droplet of sweat made a lazy trail down my back. Adrenaline coursing through my veins, I whispered “ 7? ” as the time ran out.”

3. Avoids Cliches

Imagine reading through thousands upon thousands of essays every year as an admissions officer. After your 50th essay about scoring the winning goal at the soccer game, being changed by a volunteer trip to another country, or some other overused topic, you’ll no longer connect with these stories.

No matter how beautifully an essay is written, a cliche topic just makes admissions officers want to groan and get to the next one. Make sure your essay doesn’t fall into a traditional cliche topic to make it engaging and enjoyable to read.

4. Includes an Anecdote or Personal Story

Anecdotes bring excitement and personal depth to essays. They provide an easy way for a student to show what was happening in the moment that had such a profound impact on them. Including an anecdote also facilitates personal reflection because there is a solid foundation established. Once the reader can connect with a story, they are able to better empathize with the student and appreciate their character.

Editing college essays is a great way for parents to get involved, but it can be time consuming to read through multiple essays. Luckily, CollegeVine offers two avenues for students to get their essays reviewed.

Our free Peer Essay Review tool allows students to get a free review of their essay from another student. Students can also improve their own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays.

If students want a college admissions expert to review their essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for your student to improve their chances of getting into their dream school!

Ultimate Guide to Writing Your College Essay

Tips for writing an effective college essay.

College admissions essays are an important part of your college application and gives you the chance to show colleges and universities your character and experiences. This guide will give you tips to write an effective college essay.

Want free help with your college essay?

UPchieve connects you with knowledgeable and friendly college advisors—online, 24/7, and completely free. Get 1:1 help brainstorming topics, outlining your essay, revising a draft, or editing grammar.

Writing a strong college admissions essay

Learn about the elements of a solid admissions essay.

Avoiding common admissions essay mistakes

Learn some of the most common mistakes made on college essays

Brainstorming tips for your college essay

Stuck on what to write your college essay about? Here are some exercises to help you get started.

How formal should the tone of your college essay be?

Learn how formal your college essay should be and get tips on how to bring out your natural voice.

Taking your college essay to the next level

Hear an admissions expert discuss the appropriate level of depth necessary in your college essay.

Student Stories

Student Story: Admissions essay about a formative experience

Get the perspective of a current college student on how he approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about personal identity

Get the perspective of a current college student on how she approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about community impact

Student story: admissions essay about a past mistake, how to write a college application essay, tips for writing an effective application essay, sample college essay 1 with feedback, sample college essay 2 with feedback.

This content is licensed by Khan Academy and is available for free at www.khanacademy.org.

6 Phrases Adult Children Want To Hear From Their Parents

Senior Reporter, HuffPost Life

As we mature, the relationship we have with our parents is bound to change — sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. Fostering a healthy dynamic in this new phase of life does take some work. Clear communication, respect and empathy from all parties is essential.

Therapist Nedra Glover Tawwab , author of “Set Boundaries, Find Peace,” shared a post titled “Things Adult Children Want To Hear” on her Instagram earlier this year that listed a number of simple but powerful phrases parents could say to their grown kids.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Nedra Glover Tawwab, Therapist (@nedratawwab)

We asked Glover Tawwab and other therapists to talk about the statements they believe adult children would most like to hear from their parents and explain why these words can mean so much.

“Adult children often yearn for validating phrases from their parents, such as acknowledging past pain or expressing understanding,” Lara Morales Daitter , an associate marriage and family therapist at The Connective in Northern California, told HuffPost. “These affirmations can hold significant healing power, especially when parents may have been preoccupied with their own challenges, leading to unmet emotional needs in childhood.”

Below are six powerful things parents can say to their adult children that would improve their relationship.

1. ‘I’m sorry.’

These two words are what many adult children want to hear more than anything else, therapist and author Jor-El Caraballo told HuffPost.

“As Gen Xers and millennials and some Gen Z as well start to reflect more on their upbringings, they’ve started to fully recognize how their parents’ choices impacted them,” said Caraballo, co-founder of the mental health and wellness practice Viva.

“In some cases, those choices posed some challenges to their mental health. Being able to be validated, and apologized to, by their parents would be a huge win for adult children who are seeking to break some negative family cycles and move forward in their lives with better mental health.”

Receiving a heartfelt apology from your parent can be validating and healing.

Arielle Dualan , another associate marriage and family therapist at The Connective, underscored the importance of parents apologizing to their adult children for pain they may have caused, even if it was unintended.

“Most adult children understand their parents aren’t perfect and have the best intentions when it comes to parenting,” she said. “Some parents struggle with acknowledging unintentional or intentional hurt they may have inflicted on their adult children at any stage of their life.”

Adding a “How can we work through this?” to the apology can make it even more impactful.

“Taking ownership not only creates space for emotional repair and connection, it also models humility and relational healing for the adult child, which can transcend into other relationships in their life,” Dualan said.

Caraballo pointed out that parents from certain cultures may have a harder time apologizing to their kids — communities of color, in particular, he noted.

“As a therapist, I work with a lot of Black clients specifically, and oftentimes when they express a concern about how they were raised, parents can become defensive or obstinate,” he said. “This can be for a lot of reasons, of course, some of them personal and others cultural. There can be a lot of pressure to ‘save face.’ I think it’s incredibly healing for Black families to try and normalize parents apologizing to their children when appropriate. It’s certainly not the norm, but hopefully it becomes more common in time.”

Dualan, who specializes in working with the adult children of immigrant parents, said she’s noticed her clients’ families struggle in this area. The parents may have been raised in an environment where they needed to focus on fundamental needs, like safety, while their kids may have grown up with those needs met, allowing them to focus on prioritizing things like emotional connection, she explained.

“For my clients and myself, it might mean having to shift our expectations that our parents may not be the ones to initiate emotional connection,” Dualan said. “And there is grief in never knowing that type of relationship with their parents. But we as adult children can certainly try our best on our end to create the relationship we’ve always wanted with our parents as well.”

2. ‘I was in survival mode.’

While this statement is not an excuse for poor parenting or bad behavior, it does recognize that while the parent was trying to manage everything, they did, in fact, drop the ball, Glover Tawwab said.

“As a young adult, especially one without children, it can be very hard to think of your reality of childhood outside of you being the child,” she said, “versus as this adult who had a job, who had to come home and cook, who still had to have friendships, who had to do all of these things while parenting you.”

Talking about everything they had going on at that time can provide some useful context and understanding.

“If I had more support, if I had more resources, if I had more finances, if I wasn’t going through a divorce, if I wasn’t struggling with X, Y and Z — like really recognizing those things and being able to speak to them can be very healing for the adult child relationship,” Glover Tawwab said.

Los Angeles marriage and family therapist Gayane Aramyan echoed a similar point: Our parents were likely doing the best they could with the tools they had available at that time. They may not have had the keen awareness of their emotions or the communication skills we expect of parents today.

“Having tough conversations with your parents and having them acknowledge your experience as a child can be healing in repairing the relationship between adult child and parent,” Aramyan said.

3. ‘I’m really proud of you.’

"Hearing ‘I’m proud of what you’ve done and who you are’ can be a beacon of light," said therapist Jor-El Caraballo.

No matter their age, kids want to know their parents are proud of the person they’ve become and what they’ve accomplished.

“A lot of aging parents brought up their children to ‘be better’ and strive for more than [the parent] had available to them,” Caraballo said.

“This has propelled many of us with some confidence and anxiety about how well we’re doing. Hearing ‘I’m proud of what you’ve done and who you are’ can be a beacon of light for aging millennials who doubt their achievements and position in life.”

4. ‘Your life path is different than mine, but I support you.’

Some parents may push their grown kids to follow a similar trajectory because they believe it to be the “right” way. Perhaps it feels more familiar, conventional or stable to them. However, there are many paths that can be gratifying, even if they’re quite different than the one your parents chose. Hearing them say they respect and support your decision to live life on your own terms is powerful.

“This affirming statement recognizes the individuality of the adult child’s journey and affirms their autonomy in making life choices,“ said Morales Daitter. “It conveys parental acceptance and validation, fostering a sense of empowerment and emotional well-being.”

5. ‘Do you want advice, or would you prefer for me to listen?’

When a grown child is facing a challenge, sometimes they need to find their own way through it without being rescued by a parent.

“Adult parents have to remember that I, too, have bumped my head. I, too, have made bad decisions,” Glover Tawwab said. “And I am only speaking from a place of wisdom and knowledge after trying some of these things that my kids are talking about.”

The transition from parenting a child to parenting an adult can be a difficult one.

Asking directly whether you’re looking for guidance or just a listening ear removes any guesswork from the equation and shows they believe you’re capable of handling it.

When parenting an adult, “the job is not always to protect, as it might have been when you were younger,” Glover Tawwab added. “It is now to listen and observe and ask you if you want some feedback. But hopping in and saying, ‘Oh, I have the perfect answer for you, and you need to do this’ sometimes is not welcome.”

Though it’s natural for parents to want to shield their kids from making the same mistakes, it “doesn’t give space for the adult child to assert themselves as their own person,” Dualan said, “nor does it allow the parent to learn who their adult child has become.”

6. ‘I’m still here for you.’

There’s something beautiful and comforting knowing that, even in adulthood, your parent can be a soft place for you to land.

“The job of parenting isn’t over when children reach adulthood. The relationship just changes,” Caraballo said.

“While aging parents should adjust their focus from spending the bulk of their time tending to their children to other personal pursuits, it doesn’t mean they can’t still be involved and respectful allies in their children’s lives. Figuring out the right boundaries while still maintaining an active presence and care is a delicate but important dance,” he added.

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Dear Annie: Finding peace by forgiving parents

Published: May. 31, 2024, 5:30 p.m.

Annie Lane writes the Dear Annie advice column. Creators.com

DEAR ANNIE: I wanted to write in with a mindset shift that I have had over the past couple of years. What helps me get over childhood trauma is the realization that I am who I am because of the things I’ve experienced -- both the good things and the awful things that stem from my childhood and how I’ve lived as a result. Our parents were humans and went through their own trauma as well. I forgive them and realize they were doing the best they could. Life is a journey, and we’re all still on it. -- Moving Forward

DEAR MOVING FORWARD: It sounds like you have found grace for both your family and yourself, which is a pillar in living a peaceful, happy life. I hope your letter inspires others to let go of the ways they may have been wronged in the past and to embrace the journey of life -- no easy feat!

Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected] .

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What’s the Best Advice You’ve Received About Fatherhood?

With Father’s Day around the corner, we’re looking for tips you’d like to pass on.

A father brushes his daughter's hair while she sits on the bathroom counter.

By The New York Times

Parenthood does not come with a definitive instruction manual. While there are scores of books, influencers and classes offering guidance on how to raise children, the experts all have their own, sometimes wildly different, methods. Family members or strangers on the internet who may or may not have been asked for their advice are also eager to share their often conflicting opinions. And, still, even though men are spending more time at home with their families, many of those discussions are aimed at mothers.

That’s not to say dads aren’t searching for advice. Anyone with a child, no matter what age, needs help at some point, and, in the midst of all the noise, fathers find the strategies, tips, and yes, dad jokes, that work for them.

Ahead of Father’s Day, we’d like to hear your best pieces of advice for dads today. If you’re already a father, it could be a hack that was passed down to you, or one you discovered almost by mistake. Maybe you have a seemingly magic formula to calm down a fussy kid, or a way to stay connected to a teenager in your life. Is there a parenting motto that kept you sane when things got tough? Is there something special your own father did that you wish other dads knew about?

Please fill out the form below to share your experiences and tips, and your response may be part of an upcoming article. We will not publish any part of your submission without contacting you. A reporter will be in touch first.

Share your best advice for dads

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My Worst High School Bully Is About to Be My Daughter’s Teacher. I Worry My Kid Is Her Next Victim.

I cannot believe that this is happening..

Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .

Dear Care and Feeding,

I was bullied all through middle school and high school. Not just occasional name-calling or rude remarks but vicious harassment that didn’t end until I graduated and went to live with relatives in another state. Due to circumstances beyond my control, my daughter “Lucy” and I will be moving to my hometown this summer. You can imagine my shock and anger when I learned that the girl who was the ringleader of my bullies will be Lucy’s fourth grade teacher this fall!

I try to tell myself that high school was 12 years ago and things will be fine. A more visceral part of me doesn’t want that bitch anywhere near my little girl. What should I do, if anything?

—The Past Isn’t Past

Dear Not Past,

This sounds like a nightmare, or the premise of a horror novel. I’m sorry about your school-age experiences and sorry too that circumstances are forcing you to revisit them. I know that if I were forced for some reason to interact with my middle-school bully on a regular basis—much less deliver my child to him—I’d be a wreck, and that was nearly 40 years ago.

My first question is: Does this school have multiple fourth grade classrooms? If so, you are well within your rights to petition the school’s principal for a teacher change. You don’t need to be specific, but you may consider saying, “I grew up in this town, and this teacher and I have a history that would make it very difficult for me to communicate with her during the school year.” There’s no guarantee of success, but I do think many principals would make the change—fulfilling the request now, they may (correctly) surmise, will head off a litany of problems they’d just have to deal with later.

But what do you do if, for whatever reason, you can’t make a switch? Just as we must acknowledge the possibility of change in your former bully—she may view her behavior during those years with great regret—we must acknowledge the possibility of no change. Some people remain bullies, and some of those people are teachers. I can see an argument for being forthright: making an appointment with the teacher in August, writing yourself a script ahead of time, and telling her, “You were not kind to me in school. I will be watching carefully to make sure you are kind to my daughter.” I can also see an argument for staying as low to the ground as possible, making it through the year with polite emails, and skipping parent-teacher night. Only you can decide what course to take with the teacher. More important, I think, is the course you take with your daughter.

Once the school year begins, ask your child, as neutrally as possible, what her days are like and how her teacher talks to her students. You don’t need to bring your childhood trauma to bear on those conversations (that’s not a problem your daughter needs to face), but you can listen and understand your child’s experience. If it’s a positive one—if she loves the Trunchbull—great, amazing, incredible. If it’s a negative one, you can affirm her feelings, be on her side, and, perhaps, gird yourself for battle.

My entire family is moving to a new state in July, and so my children start at a new school in September. I’m particularly worried about my oldest child, “Grace,” who is a young teenager. Grace is autistic (diagnosed three years ago) and has issues with fitting in at her current school. She already has plans to completely change herself for her new school (including learning to do makeup and modifying her personality entirely). I don’t think that this is healthy, but I don’t know how to bring it up to Grace since she didn’t tell me. I found out because she left a notebook with her plans to change herself on the kitchen table.

I’m worried about Grace, and checking her phone last night didn’t ease my concerns. (Lots of YouTube videos about becoming “that girl” and being popular at school are saved to her Watch Later list, and her subscriptions on Webtoon contain the likes of “True Beauty”—I didn’t get into it too much, as it was an uncomfortable read, but basically: The main character is ugly and unpopular in middle school, then, over the summer, changes her looks and personality and interests to fit in, starts high school, and immediately becomes popular.) How do I talk to her about this without letting her in on the fact that her mom read her notebook? (She knows I check her phone.) Should I even bring it up to her at all? Is this actually completely normal and healthy behavior and I’m just overthinking it?

—She Shouldn’t Have to Change

Dear Shouldn’t,

Ah, the ol’ New School Glow-Up. To answer your final question first: This is completely normal behavior; like everything a young teenager does, it’s not entirely healthy; and yes, you’re overthinking it a tiny bit.

The teenage years are often when kids see the banal lessons of so much children’s entertainment— just be yourself, and you’ll be happy! —repudiated by the harsh realities of middle school. It can often feel to a middle schooler as if the very root of their unhappiness is whatever it is that makes them unique. After all, that’s what other kids torment them about! So, what’s so great about being myself? What if I was … someone else?

Your daughter sees an opportunity, in this new school, for a new start. It’s not surprising she’s considering trying to make the most of it. You’re naturally worried about your child burying her true self under some kind of mask—and worried too that if it doesn’t work the way she wants it to she’ll be hurt. Her diagnosis may be adding particular concern for you, given that for some people with autism, the act of “masking” can be damaging to their mental health.

And yet: Teenagers are unusually mutable! It’s not at all uncommon for a young teen to experiment with multiple looks, attitudes, and personalities over the course of a single school year. Many teens are trying to figure out who they are and trying a lot of selves on for size. That’s a normal, and in some ways laudable, part of adolescence. Expressing an interest in makeup might be the least surprising thing a young teenager can do. Honestly, going to a new school is intimidating. What your daughter needs most going into this new environment is confidence, something that’s been hard to come by over the past few years. If a little makeup and an artificially sunny disposition helps her ease this transition, well, she wouldn’t be the first person who faked it (a little) until she made it (a little).

Mention to Grace that you noticed some videos about makeup on her phone, and offer to help teach her about makeup this summer. You don’t need to punctuate your lessons with explanations about how she’s beautiful just as she is. Just connect with her while embarking on this new and interesting task. Indeed, if she has watched enough tutorials, you may end up learning quite a bit from her. (Like, what the hell is the point of “setting spray”? Is it like glue you apply to your face ? Maybe she’ll know.)

Is Grace truly going to attempt a total personality transplant? Who knows! Your job as a parent is to remind her that she is always going to be loved, no matter what experiments she embarks on, and to continue instilling in her the kindness and generosity that will remain in her core no matter what new identity she tries on.

I have a 3-year-old son, “Toby.” Toby is mostly a good kid, but he does have some tendencies that drive me up the wall. If he sees you with something, he wants it, no matter what it is or that he can’t do anything with it. And he’ll come up with some sort of ridiculous toddler argument for why he deserves it, then haggle relentlessly until he gets something. So, for instance, I received some Mother’s Day cookies as a gift a few weeks ago. I was nibbling one, and Toby came toddling in and wanted one. I told him they were a Mother’s Day present and only for mommies, which he took a moment to absorb and said, “You’re only a mom because of me. I should get half.” It was kind of funny, and I couldn’t stop chuckling, at which point he wanted to know what the joke was. That led to another round of negotiations, and eventually I managed to disentangle him. I just don’t know how to deal. The simplest of things turn into 10-to-15-minute-long discussions because he has grabby little fingers and never stops arguing. How do I get him to calm down already?

—OMG Stop Arguing With Me, Toby

Dear Stop Arguing,

It is very funny to me that your example of Toby’s maddening behavior is him seeing you eating a cookie and asking for a cookie, something that every 3-year-old on the face of the earth would also do. (It is also funny that you tried to convince him there is such a thing as a cookie “for mommies only”—though perhaps the reason this was the last straw was that you spend most days thinking, Cripes, isn’t anything just for me?! ) Anyway, I’ll leave that aside and take it as a given that Toby does this about everything in your house, not just delicious cookies.

The Dutch would say that Toby’s willingness to endlessly discuss and negotiate every point is a positive trait, one you should foster in order to encourage the building of consensus in family decisions. I, however, agree with you that this is annoying. Toby is endlessly haggling with you because you respond to the haggling. So if you want him to do it less, you need to engage less. The traditional way to cut such discussions short is to choose an answer (“Power saws are not safe for children,” “I’m reading this book now, and when I’m done you can look at it”) and stick with it. If he keeps pestering, repeat the answer in the most disinterested tone possible. Definitely don’t end the haggling by giving in and handing him the power saw!

However: You could follow this technique perfectly, spending your entire day repeating “This setting spray is not for children” in a robotic monotone, and he might still continue debating you forever. Some kids are just debate-me bros from birth! Eventually, they lose interest—or else go to law school.

I would be remiss if I did not point out: Another way to cut this short is to reconsider your initial response. I spent a lot of my kids’ childhood saying no on instinct because in some way I viewed that as my job—only to then find myself defending semi-absurd positions I’d knee-jerk declared out of a sense that I needed to remain consistent. Eventually I learned that a lot of the time, if it isn’t actually important, you might as well just give a kid the item when they first ask. Not when it’s a power saw. But definitely when it’s a cookie.

My baby is the only grandchild on both sides. My husband went to work for my father, so we moved here and built a house after we got married. My father-in-law sold his company, and my in-laws took an early retirement and now live across the country.

They extensively travel—just not to see us. They dislike our state and our city’s lack of local culture (despite the fact we are near a performing arts college). But they constantly complain about not getting time with our child! They haven’t seen her in nine months, and every conversation is centered on how unfair it is that my family sees her so much but they don’t.

They have visited Europe twice in the past six months. I don’t see why they can’t hop on a plane to see us. We have a guest room, and I very much don’t want to travel with our child until she is older.

My husband says that this is just how his parents are and not to let it get to me. Whenever we FaceTime with them, it’s the same old guilt tactics.

What do we do here?

—Just Book a Flight!

For starters, you should just get the hell off these FaceTimes! They’re his parents, not yours. Until such time as your in-laws make an effort to establish a relationship with you that isn’t based around guilt trips, you’re completely within your rights to just … go do something else while your husband and child talk to them. Go for a swim! Take in a show at the local performing arts college! Whatever!

As a rule, retired grandparents with money should make it their entire jobs to visit their grandchildren. I mean, they’re allowed to have other interests, but if they really want to see their grandchildren, they should be the ones traveling—parents of small children have plenty to do already! As a next step, your husband should make a specific invitation to them during his next FaceTime: “We would like you to visit for five days sometime in July. Please choose those days. If July doesn’t work for you, name a month.” I hope they wisely take him up on his offer and get to see their darling granddaughter. If they remain recalcitrant and keep complaining that they’re being left out, well, at least you won’t have to listen to them.

Are Selena Gomez's parents immigrants? Everything to know about singer-produced Netflix series Living Undocumented

S elena Gomez is a multi-platinum recording artist, philanthropist, actress, and producer. The Emilia Perez actress is the executive producer of the Netflix documentary Living Undocumented .

She was approached with the project in 2017 and was moved to tears after she watched footage of people who live in constant fear of deportation. Released in 2019, the six-part series follows the lives of eight undocumented immigrant families in the United States.

The Single Soon singer was born to Mandy Teefey and Ricardo Joel Gomez on July 22, 1992. While her mother was in Texas and has Italian ancestry, her father's side of the family has a complicated immigration history. Gomez penned an emotional note in honor of the documentary and the lives that are affected by undocumented immigration.

Everything about Living Undocumented

Executive-produced by Selena Gomez , Living Undocumented debuted on Netflix on October 2, 2019. The six-part documentary series does not depict fictional portrayals but rather follows the lives of eight families who live in six different states, hail from six different countries, and experience various problems due to their immigration status. According to Vulture, the families hail from Honduras, Mexico, Colombia, Laos, Israel, and Mauritania.

The series has been co-directed and co–executive produced by Aaron Saidman and Anna Chai. To find the families, the producers scanned through hundreds of potential candidates through local news, immigration attorneys, and even social media.

Gomez took to her Instagram to share a glimpse of the documentary. The footage shows a young girl who was separated from her uncle and aunt as they were detained at the borders.

"I feel afraid for my country," Executive Producer Selena Gomez writes powerful essay for Living Undocumented

Selena Gomez took to her Instagram to post about the release and expressed gratitude and joy in participating in the documentary. She wrote,

"Grateful to play a part in getting this out into the world."

Additionally, she penned an emotional and powerful essay in honor of the documentary with Time. The Rare Beauty founder wrote that she thinks about undocumented immigrants daily and is grateful to be born in the United States. However, she penned down her pain in seeing the atrocities faced by immigrants and expressed her fear,

"When I read the news headlines or see debates about immigration rage on social media, I feel afraid for those in similar situations. I feel afraid for my country."

In her essay, she acknowledged that she is not an expert on the complexities of immigration, but she recognizes that it can dismantle lives. Selena Gomez urged her readers who think about undocumented immigration and noted,

"How we deal with it speaks to our humanity, our empathy, our compassion. How we treat our fellow human beings defines who we are."

She also offered an idea in which everyone can contribute towards this sensitive cause. She wrote,

"It's time to listen to the people whose lives are being directly affected by immigration policies."

"It's time to get to know the individuals whose complex stories have been reduced to basic headlines."

Selena talks about her family's immigration and her message for immigrant graduates

Living Undocumented is close to Selena Gomez's heart and her family's experiences. In the essay, she also wrote about her family and noted her family's experiences crossing the border from Mexico and living in the United States. She wrote that in the 1970s, her aunt crossed the Mexico border and entered the United States "hidden in the back of a truck."

Selena Gomez further revealed that her grandparents followed, and her father was born in Texas. She reported that her family has worked hard for four decades to gain US citizenship. She wrote,

"In 1992, I was born a U.S. citizen thanks to their bravery and sacrifice."

In 2020, she talked about her family in a graduation speech and praised immigrant students who graduated during the COVID pandemic. She said,

"I want you guys to know that you matter and that your experiences are a huge part of the American story."

Selena Gomez's experience of Living Undocumented touches on her own personal experiences. Her essay urges her fans to become more aware of immigration concerns and educate themselves about the millions of people in the country.

Are Selena Gomez's parents immigrants? Everything to know about singer-produced Netflix series Living Undocumented

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