2 MBA Admissions Essays That Worked
These outstanding MBA personal statements resulted in admissions offers.
2 MBA Essays That Worked
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MBA admissions officials say they prefer personal statements that convey personality and demonstrate grit.
There is no secret formula to writing a compelling personal statement for an MBA application, university admissions officials say.
The key, they say, is to write a statement that feels authentic and makes your case.
Bruce DelMonico, assistant dean for admissions at the Yale University School of Management , is wary of personal statements that tell dramatic stories and stretch the truth. He says he is not looking for students to have exotic experiences, but for evidence of resilience, introspection and initiative.
Yale's business school recruits students identified as unselfish leaders – those who strive to improve the circumstances of others and help themselves rather than those who exploit others for personal gain, DelMonico says.
"We are looking to bring in students who will be inclusive leaders and who will bring people together," DelMonico says.
William Rieth, former senior director with the Fox School of Business at Temple University , says applicants sometimes struggle to write a memorable personal statement, but being memorable is vital.
"Students need to remember their audience," he says. "Schools are reading thousands of essays."
He says a solid personal statement requires a "compelling story" and an honest writing voice. "It should reflect your personality and sound like you."
How to Write an MBA Application Essay: A Few Tips
MBA admissions experts say a business school application essay should offer a convincing argument about why a candidate belongs in an MBA program at that particular school.
Wayne Hutchison, managing director for the MBA program at Michigan State University’s Eli Broad College of Business , urges prospective MBA students to explain their reasons for applying to B-school and to describe whatever incidents spurred their interest in graduate business education.
"In addition, applicants should discuss the skills and abilities they have that will translate to academic and professional success," Hutchison wrote in an email, noting that failing to include this information can lead admissions officers to question an MBA hopeful's competitiveness.
Aaron Burch, who earned his MBA degree from the University of Texas—Austin's McCombs School of Business , says MBA essays should address the following questions:
- "What do you want to accomplish career-wise that either requires an MBA or will be accelerated by an MBA?"
- "Why is this the exact point in your career where an MBA would be most impactful?"
- "What about this particular school is especially important for your career plans?"
- "How will you contribute?"
Burch, owner of DiscoverContainers.com – a website that provides information about shipping container houses – suggests that MBA students convey that they are at a point in their careers where they can "pivot without being pigeonholed" while having meaningful accomplishments, including "real responsibility."
It's also essential for MBA candidates to showcase what they have to offer a B-school, Burch wrote in an email. "You want to demonstrate that you're not just a taker and you want to add to the prestige and reputation of the school, add to the experience your future classmates will have, etc."
MBA alumni say it's crucial for prospective MBA students to describe how they intend to use an MBA .
"Admissions officers will want to understand your vision behind why an MBA might help you, so it's incumbent upon you to articulate the plan you have for yourself, and how their institution is going to help your journey," MBA degree recipient Taylor Constantine – the partner channel lead with Rain, a financial services company – wrote in an email.
Margo Bell, senior assistant director of admissions with Pepperdine University's Graziadio Business School in California, notes that MBA essays are influential factors in the MBA admissions process. Application essays help B-school admissions committees gauge the compatibility of a prospective student with the culture and values of the institution.
"As applicants begin to write their MBA applicant essays, it’s important for prospective students to share who they are as an individual," Bell wrote in an email. "The essay allows MBA admission officers to get a better understanding of who you are, what you wish to accomplish and why you deserve to be accepted."
Michal Strahilevitz, associate professor of marketing with St. Mary's College of California , advises MBA applicants to view the application essay as an opportunity to provide context for deficits in their admissions profile. "For example, if your undergraduate grades were not great because you worked full time to pay for school, write about it," Strahilevitz explained in an email.
What to Keep in Mind About MBA Essay Prompts
MBA admissions consultants note that business schools often have distinctive essay prompts, so it's important for applicants to tailor their essay to every school where they apply.
"Each school asks a specific question in the essay, and one of the most important things you can do as an applicant is to answer that question – not the question you wished we asked or the one you want to answer," DelMonico wrote in an email. "The various elements of the application fit together, and we’re looking to get very specific pieces of information from the essay. So please follow the essay instructions you’re given and don’t feel as though you need to or should make the essay broader in scope."
Barbara Coward, founder of the MBA 360° Admissions Consulting firm based in the Baltimore-Washington metropolitan area, notes that the first step in the essay writing process should be meticulously reading the question prompt. Think about the question for a few days while going about routine tasks so that ideas can "marinate."
Coward says that once prospective students have decided what they'd like to write about, they should let the words flow without filtering them because too much self-editing at the beginning of the creative process can interfere with productivity. Revisions and tweaks can come after an applicant has fully expressed his or her ideas.
Admissions experts note that MBA hopefuls who are struggling to figure out how to describe themselves may want to ask friends and family for advice. Prospective MBA students can also gain self-awareness by keeping a diary or creating a storyboard of their life.
Mistakes to Avoid in MBA Admission Essays
Taking too long to express the main idea or central thesis of an essay is a no-no, Coward says. Applicants should directly respond to a question and ensure that their essay is easily understood by an admissions officer. "Keep in mind that somebody is not reading a novel," she says. "They're going to be glancing through."
Excessively verbose essays don't make a good impression, Coward adds. Applicants should respect word limits and be concise, because doing otherwise creates extra work for admissions officers under time pressure, she explains.
Two other errors to avoid in MBA essays, Coward says, are being monotonous or melodramatic . It's important to have an introductory sentence that strikes the right tone, she adds. "You're not trying to create drama, but you don't want to put the person to sleep either," Coward says.
Examples of Outstanding MBA Essays
Here are two MBA essays that made the cut. The first is from the Fox School of Business and the second is from Yale. These essays are annotated with comments that explain why the essays charmed admissions committees.
Searching for a business school? Get our complete rankings of Best Business Schools .
Tags: graduate schools , business school , MBAs , students
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A Guide to “Why MBA?” and “Why Our Business School?” Essays
D uring your MBA application campaign, you will almost certainly be asked why you believe you need an MBA. Often, this question is not just about “Why MBA?” it is also asking why you want an MBA from that particular business school.
The “Why MBA” Essay is your chance to convince admissions officers that their school is the perfect fit for what you are looking for in an MBA program. The best essays are both personal and specific. You need to effectively convey what you are seeking from an MBA program and tell the admissions committee why their school will best meet your needs. This article takes a close look at the “Why Our Business School” Essay and provides you with the insights, tools, and examples you need to succeed.
First, we’ll talk about the common mistakes that applicants make when writing a “Why MBA” Essay and highlight resources for preparing better answers. We’ll also share the characteristics of an outstanding essay response. We’ll even provide you with a set of building blocks for crafting a unique and powerful essay of your own.
In the final section of this article, we analyze a sample “Why Our Business School?” Essay so that you see all of the principles in this article in action.
Common Mistakes in a “Why MBA” Essay
You might seriously undermine your chances for admission to a top-tier program with a weak or generic answer to the “Why MBA” question.
Effectively answering this MBA essay question begins with careful research to select which business schools to apply to. That work will take more than browsing the rankings and spending a few minutes on each program’s website. When admissions committees ask you why you are applying to their school, you need to explain at a deeper level what you’re hoping to gain from an MBA program and how that exact school best meets your needs.
Because so many applicants submit generic, flawed answers to the “Why MBA” question, it’s worth spending a few moments examining an ineffective essay response.
Here we have printed an example MBA essay written by an aspiring student who failed to read this article and follow our advice:
I am applying to your school because I need a thorough grounding in general management and the key business disciplines. In your program, I will have the opportunity to study with world-class professors, alongside ambitious students who have distinguished themselves as future leaders. Your school’s alumni network will open doors and prepare me for long-term success. In short, I couldn’t be more excited about spending the next two years in your program and would be honored if offered the opportunity to do so.
This would-be MBA will cut and paste this response into all of his MBA applications and assume that he’s adequately explained his motivations for applying for an MBA. Months later, he’ll scratch his head and wonder what went wrong when the “ding letters” start rolling in from business schools he hoped to attend.
But what’s wrong with this example essay? His reasons for applying to the school appear logical on the surface, and he’s written flattering things about the program.
To understand the problems with this sample essay, put yourself in an admissions officer’s shoes. Would this essay response convince you that the applicant knows what sets your program apart from the others? Has he proven that your school is an excellent fit with his specific career goals, academic needs, and cultural expectations?
An effective “Why MBA” essay begins with thoughtful research on the programs available. If you haven’t started your school research , then you have plenty of work to do before you begin outlining the contents of this kind of essay. Once you have chosen your target programs, you’ll need to dig deeper into the specific resources each program offers that make it a good fit.
Research Tips for “Why Our School” MBA Essays
Where can you go to generate valuable material for a “Why Our Business School?” MBA essay? Here are some sources you may not have considered:
Visit the School
School visits will provide you with first-hand observations that admissions officers appreciate. For example, in your essays and interview, you can reference students you met and things that stood out to you while visiting the school. However, don’t go overboard; if it feels like you are name-dropping or padding your answer, this strategy can backfire.
Join Official Email Distribution Lists and Read Admissions Blogs
Many MBA admission offices communicate regularly through traditional and new media channels. We recommend that you make every effort to stay on top of information the admissions office publishes. Be sure to add your email to the distribution list of each school on your target list so that you don’t miss important news and events.
Follow Student Blogs
An increasing number of MBA students are writing blogs to share their experiences in business school; while some are sanctioned by the admissions office, others are not. Do not overlook these opportunities to benefit from current students’ eye-witness accounts.
Talk to Current Students
An information source even more valuable than a student blog is a chat, whether on the phone or in person, with a current student. Many MBA students are happy to play the role of ambassadors for their program and give you the “inside scoop” on classes, clubs, and the student experience. Officers of student clubs related to your personal or professional interests are possible options if you don’t have friends or friends-of-friends in your network. Make sure to respect the time of everyone you speak to — they are very busy people. Think carefully about what you want to learn so that you can ask questions that will lead to great insights for your “Why MBA” essay.
Chat with Alumni
The school’s alumni network is one of the most critical assets of any MBA program. Many alumni are ready and willing to tell you more about their experiences and relive their days in the program by sharing them with prospective students. Search your professional networks (such as LinkedIn) for connections to alumni from the schools you will apply to and ask them if they would be willing to have a quick chat with you about their alma mater.
Once you’ve gathered this information, it’s time to start thinking about which data points to include and how to assemble them. To do this successfully, you need to know how to score top marks with the admissions officer reading your essay.
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Please enter your email below to gain 30 days of free access to our MBA Essay Writing course. Learn about the five most frequently asked MBA application essay questions and access our brainstorming tools and sample essays.
How to Score Top Marks on the “Why MBA” Essay
The best answers to the “Why MBA” essay questions are both personal and specific. They are personal because they cover the unique challenges that you need to prepare for, given your short-term and long-term career goals. They are specific because they draw distinct connections between your motivations for an MBA and the distinctive resources that a particular school offers. An excellent response will prove that you don’t just want an MBA; you want an MBA from that individual school!
Let’s look at the characteristics of an outstanding “Why MBA” Essay.
First off, MBA admissions officers tend to use the “Why MBA” essay question as a test of your decision-making abilities and your ability to communicate your rationale for a decision. These skills are fundamental to succeeding in business school and as a business leader in the future.
Do you have crystal clear reasons for pursuing an MBA at that school? By this stage in your application process, you need to have the building blocks of a convincing case for pursuing an MBA and pursuing an MBA there . Armed with those points, you are ready to make your case to the admissions officers. Your overarching objective is to persuade admissions officers that attending this program will benefit you tremendously – not just any student, but you specifically.
In the earlier essay example, you learned not to cut-and-paste boilerplate reasons for why you want an MBA. Instead, show admissions officers that you genuinely understand the school’s unique resources and culture. “Boilerplate” answers like “I’m applying because you have great professors, an amazing student body, and a powerful alumni network” just won’t cut it. Look carefully at each point in your essay outline – if you can make the same point about any top MBA program, then you haven’t tailored your essay enough to prove to the admissions committee that you value what their school has to offer.
Building on that idea, write about the classes, clubs, professors, and special programs that matter most to you. An essay that sounds like a list of bullet points analyzing the program’s competitive advantages can entirely miss the mark. The things that are different about the school must connect to your learning goals — the new skills, knowledge, and experiences you hope to acquire in the program that will help you succeed in the future. Armed with a clear understanding of your learning agenda, tell admissions officers how you plan to close those gaps as a student at their school.
If you’ve done your school due diligence, you’ve taken active steps to get to know the program. However, simply name-dropping the professors, students, or alumni you’ve spoken to won’t help. Instead, tell your reader what you learned in your school research that impressed you and why.
Next, once you have a complete draft, consider the tone of your essay – have you expressed excitement and enthusiasm? Your emotional and personal reasons for applying can be just as convincing as the logical ones.
Finally, while some schools may ask a separate “what you plan to contribute” essay , this prompt offers another opportunity to share plans for being an active contributor on campus. For example, if you write about a student club that appeals to you, also tell the admissions officers how you might make the club even better as a student leader.
Let’s take a look at the content building blocks for an outstanding “Why MBA” Essay.
Content Building Blocks for the “Why MBA” Essay
You already know that, to create a strong “Why MBA” Essay, your points must be personal, specific, and convincing. The trick is to connect your learning goals — the new skills, knowledge, experience, and relationships you must have to succeed in your future career – with the unique resources that impressed you about the school — the academic programs, professors, student organizations, special programs, and relationships that only this school can offer you.
On the way to showing you an effective sample MBA essay, let’s look at the brainstorming process of a hypothetical applicant who has a plan for showcasing personal and specific evidence for her “Why MBA” essay.
Our case study applicant “Cheryl” plans to start a luxury retail goods company long-term. In general, Cheryl wants to build marketing expertise through an MBA. Specifically, she wants to acquire expertise in building a brand in the luxury retail sector. During her school research, she discovered that Columbia had several courses, professors, and resources that matched her learning goals. She combined her career planning and school research to create sharp points for her “Why MBA” essay.
First of all, Cheryl will go beyond boilerplate answers such as “I need to learn about marketing” and plans to write about the “Design and Marketing of Luxury Products Course” offered by Columbia.
Second, instead of a generic point about building relationships with her fellow students, she will make the more specific point that Columbia is the ideal place to build relationships in the luxury retail sector because of its location in New York, a global fashion hub. Furthermore, Columbia is one of only a handful of programs with a Retail and Luxury Goods Club, and Cheryl aspires to be the President of the club.
Finally, whereas the flawed sample essay refers vaguely to the appeal of “Top-Notch Professors, ” Cheryl is going to write about her plans to conduct a field study with the former CEO of Saks 5th Avenue, who, she learned, is currently a visiting professor at Columbia.
In the sample essay below, you can see how Cheryl assembled her content building blocks into a compelling “Why MBA” essay.
We hope this example convinces you of the power of synthesizing your development goals with thorough school research. If you do that, you will have points for your “Why MBA” essay that describe your learning goals and illustrate how they link to the school’s unique attributes and resources.
“Why Our School” Essay Sample
Introduction One of the most valuable things I have learned in my two years founding and building an Internet retailer is what I don’t know. After successfully selling my start-up to a larger firm, I have decided to apply for an MBA from Columbia to learn how luxury brands are built.
Lead/Thesis Columbia’s courses, professors, location, and extracurricular organizations make the program an ideal place to prepare me for my career aspirations to build a luxury goods brand.
“Why Our School” Point #1 At Columbia, I can learn how a fashion brand is built. I was thrilled to discover Columbia’s “Design and Marketing of Luxury Products” Course – where I would have the chance to study cases of successful luxury brands and to collaborate on a class project with designers from the Parsons School of Design.
“Why Our School” Point #2 Only at Columbia will I have the opportunity to study with Professor John Smith, a recognized guru in the luxury goods world and former CEO of Saks Fifth Avenue. Furthermore, in the school’s innovative Master Class program, I can engage with a luxury goods retailer in my second year and apply what I have learned about luxury brand building in the Columbia classroom.
Final Thoughts
When you conduct school research to determine which MBA programs to apply to, assess the program’s “fit” with your goals and preferences. Your “Why Our Business School?” essay is your chance to present that evidence to admissions officers to persuade them that their school is the perfect match with your academic needs, career goals, and cultural expectations. Aligning your interests with the program’s strengths and resources in a personal and specific way will get you one step closer to an acceptance letter from a top MBA program.
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- Why MBA? and Why Our School? Essay Example
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Home — Essay Samples — Education — Graduation — Why I Choose Business Major: The Reasons
Why I Choose Business Major: The Reasons
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Updated: 27 November, 2023
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Works Cited
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- Falcone, E. A., Schorr, G. S., Douglas, A. B., Calambokidis, J., Henderson, E. E., McKenna, M. F., ... & Hildebrand, J. A. (2019). Species‐specific responses to anthropogenic noise: Baleen whales respond to piling noise. Marine Mammal Science, 35(1), 1-19.
- Giles, D., & Middleton, J. (2013). Killer whales, SeaWorld, and the Blackfish Effect. International Journal of Humanities and Social Science Research, 1(2), 39-49.
- Lusseau, D., & Higham, J. E. S. (2004). Managing the impacts of dolphin-based tourism through the definition of critical habitats: the case of bottlenose dolphins (Tursiops spp.) in Doubtful Sound, New Zealand. Tourism Management, 25(6), 657-667. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tourman.2003.09.008
- Marino, L., Lilienfeld, S. O., Malamud, R., Nobis, N., & Broglio, R. (2010). Do zoos and aquariums promote attitude change in visitors? A critical evaluation of the American zoo and aquarium study. Society & Animals, 18(2), 126-138. https://doi.org/10.1163/106311110X12586086109504
- Morgan, D. K., & Tromborg, C. T. (2007). Sources of stress in captivity. Applied Animal Behaviour Science, 102(3-4), 262-302.
- Ross, L. E., & Campbell, L. K. (2013). The Psychological Effects of Captivity: A Review of the Literature. Journal of Applied Animal Welfare Science, 16(2), 105-125.
- Smith, A. (2013, July 18). The Dark Secrets Behind America's Captive Killer Whale Industry. The Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/film/2013/jul/18/blackfish-killer-whale-seaworld-documentary.
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MBA Essay Tips: The 4 Admissions Essays You’ll Likely Encounter When Applying to Business School
It can seem like there are an infinite variety of MBA admissions essays. With famous examples, like the Stanford GSB application’s “What Matters Most to You, and Why?” or the Duke Fuqua application’s “25 Random Things”, it is easy to get overwhelmed thinking that you will have to write a completely different essay with a different subject for every question on every one of your business school applications. While each type of MBA essay does need to be tailored to each b-school, you can simplify and streamline the process of essay writing by embracing the idea that most admission essay prompts can be categorized into core themes.
Let’s get to know them below:
MBA Application Essay #1: The Personal Statement
MBA admissions committees care about your core values, your moral character, and the passions that motivate you. For example, UC Berkeley’s Haas Business School has four stated defining principles :
- Question the Status Quo
- Confidence Without Attitude
- Students Always
- Beyond Yourself
Dartmouth’s Tuck School of Business is interested in accepting genuinely nice people . Duke’s Fuqua School of Business is interested in people’s “ decency quotient .” These business schools look to recruit people with worldviews that are compatible with these values and it is your job, in this category of essay, to make sure that comes across.
Luckily, you can talk about almost anything in these personal essays. Applicants will often discuss relationships with friends and mentors. Others might talk about the hardships they overcame or difficult experiences. However, there are some things to avoid which we discus here: 4 Mistakes Applicants Make when Writing the Personal Essay .
Do You Have Enough Time to Apply in Round 2?
Take our quiz and find out whether you should submit in Round 2— or whether you should wait to apply next year.
At the core, your business school personal statement should serve to illuminate who you are as a person and demonstrate that you live according to a code that is in line with your target business school’s own approach to education.
Yaron Dahan on the Importance of Your Story:
Mba application essay #2: the career goals essay.
Business school admissions committees want you to have a good job when you graduate from their MBA program. This is for three reasons:
- Business schools want their employment report to look good! That means that a very high percentage of graduates receive job offers (currently 98.4% at Wharton , for example), and those jobs have high compensation.
- Business schools want you to get not just “a job”, but a job that you really want. Satisfied students who achieved their goals are likely to promote the school to other potential students and speak well of the program.
- Business schools hope for (some of) their graduates to make enough money to eventually become donors.
Even though getting a good job is important, this isn’t everything. In order to stand out from other candidates, the job needs to be a bit inspiring as well. If you are not ambitious enough in outlining your goals and the impact you want to make in your future career, it is possible to come across as a boring candidate who is more or less content to stay in their current position with slightly better pay. Business schools will likely take a hard pass on those applicants. That said, if you are not somewhat realistic with what you want to accomplish, you can end up sounding naïve or unserious.
The goal here is to walk the line between the two. It is your job to convince the school that you have goals which are meaningful, but also grounded in your past experiences and considered enough that your success is assured.
To hear more on this, check out: Career Goals for MBA Essay Writing and More .
Demonstrating School Fit
After you state your goals, you’ll also need to explain how the MBA is a necessary part of achieving those goals. This is a chance to show that not only do you need an MBA , but that the particular program you’re applying to is exactly the right fit with your development needs.
What MBA programs really want to know is that you have done your homework and researched the school in detail. Admissions officers DON’T want to see copy/paste from the course catalogue. It is important to network with schools beforehand and then use what you learned to show that only their institution really has the resources to make your goals a reality.
Rebecca Heath Anderson on Researching Career Goals:
Mba application essay #3: school participation essay.
Business schools are selfish! They want to know that you will add something to their institution by attending. Schools rely on students to run many programs, such as professional clubs, and want to know that you will be an active participant in the campus culture. In fact, MBA programs tend to do almost every class and activity in groups.
In order to answer questions like these effectively, you will need to map out the kinds of school-sponsored clubs, conferences, and activities in which you are interested in participating. Consider where you can make helpful contributions to campus life: how can you benefit your classmates as well as the school as a whole?
MBA Application Essay #4: Behavioral Essays
An MBA program might ask about your previous experiences, both to gauge whether you’re ready to benefit from the school’s leadership development programs and to know your moral values as a leader. These questions can come in a number of forms.
They might prompt you by saying “Tell us about a time when you led a team” or even “Tell us about a time when you failed.”
What schools really are looking for, in this instance, is some sign that you are self-reflective. They want to understand that you have experienced some leadership setbacks that have made you interested in and prepared to take in the knowledge they have to offer.
MBA Leadership Essays and How to Write Them
What makes you a strong leader? This can be a difficult question to answer. If you have a lot of leadership experience, your challenge is to tell your story in a compelling and authentic way. And if you don’t have a lot of leadership experience, your task is to be creative about how you answer the prompt, so that you can demonstrate to admissions committees the type of leader you’ll be.
In both cases it’s important not to exaggerate the truth. As soon as you inflate what your actual experience was, you call into question not only your response to the leadership question, but also the truthfulness of the rest of your application.
When shaping a response to the leadership question, you should first think about all of the people you interact with at your job: your manager, colleagues, team members of other departments, office staff, and HR. Consider your role on this team, and what your contributions were.
If you truly had a leadership role, reflect upon your experiences—good and bad—in leading a team. Admissions committees want to see not just your successes, but also your resilience and ability to learn from mistakes. If you weren’t the leader, you can pull from examples of good leadership that you have encountered, and demonstrate how you embody those skills, perhaps by describing non-work-related leadership positions you have held.
Questions to Consider for Leadership Essays
When developing your response to the leadership question, it is important to provide as many specifics as possible—particularly in your earliest drafts. Here are some questions that can help you make your essay convincing and engaging. (You don’t necessarily need to answer all of them; they are just a starting point.)
- What did you do in your role to fix problems?
- How did you handle situations where you had to escalate the issue to management?
- How did you work with people who weren’t members of your team? How did you get what you needed, even from people who couldn’t care less about you?
- If everyone in the office was down, what did you do to perk people up?
- Did you ever informally mentor junior colleagues?
- What fears or problems did you overcome in order to lead successfully?
Writing about Difficulties, Failures and Weaknesses
A common question in MBA essay prompts concerns a failure or setback in your career. These are a few examples of essay prompts that top MBA programs have used to ask about this topic:
- Tell us three setbacks you have faced.
- Describe a situation taken from your personal or professional life where you failed. Discuss what you learned.
- Discuss a time when you faced a challenging interpersonal experience. How did you navigate the situation and what did you learn from it?
These can be unpleasant topics to write about. How should an applicant respond to questions like these?
Pick a Genuine Failure or Weakness
Although it may seem tempting to tell a story in which your own failures are minimized, this type of response is unlikely to be effective, because it does not give you the chance to show self-reflection and personal growth. Moreover, an example where you give a ‘faux failure’ is much less likely to engage the reader than one where you describe a genuine failure of setback.
For example, imagine that you decided to write about an important project that failed due to an error by someone in the team you supervised. You may be tempted to write that “the team member was unable to take the responsibility and should have been monitored more closely.” Although this may be part of the story, a better response would include some reflection on your personal contribution to the problem. Instead of giving the trite insight that you should have monitored the team more carefully, you could write about the shortcomings in your management style and ability to motivate the team. By doing this, you show that you are honest and able to to reflect on failures, and you give yourself the chance to go on to describe what you have learned.
Don’t Turn a Failure Essay Into an Achievement Essay
For instance, in the above example, do not draw the attention away from your failure in managing the team by pointing out how hard you worked on the project yourself. You do not want to give the application committee the impression that you only want to talk about your successes, but are reluctant to reflect on your weaknesses.
Describe What You Learned
End your essay by describing what you have learned from your failure or setback and give an example of how you used your new insight. This is an expected topic even if it is not mentioned in the text of the prompt.
An average essay draws trite lessons. Sticking again with the example above, you might write that “each team member has a unique style and should be motivated accordingly.” A better response includes more details: Why did you fail to connect with the problem team member? Were there warning signs that you could have seen? A great response includes an example where you put your fix into action: you can mention, for instance, how you worked successfully with the same team member on a later project or were able to spot a potential problem early on in another team you managed afterwards.
By taking the courage to write honestly and directly about your failures, and then showing how you have put your learnings into action after the failure, you will have tackled this difficult essay topic successfully.
Now that we have looked at the main categories of MBA essays, let’s talk about one of the persistent myths about the MBA application process: using example essays and templates.
MBA Essay Examples and Templates–A Bad Idea
It is tempting to think that you can model your business school essay off of someone else’s successful essay. People spend time and money searching for “the perfect MBA essay sample” to use as a guide. First, you may hope to avoid the effort of having to write the essay yourself. Second, this is the sort of cargo cult thinking that says: if I copy what a successful applicant did, then I will also be admitted.
The truth of the matter is that sample essays don’t work. People get admitted to MBA programs for many reasons. Menlo Coaching has bought and reviewed several editions of the Harbus Essay Guide , which contains a number of successful HBS essays… and some of the essays therein are absolutely terrible. One essay spent its entire length bragging about the writer’s vast family wealth and all the celebrities the writer knew. Clearly, that applicant did not get in on the merits of their essay-writing skills.
Former HBS director of admissions Dee Leopold famously said that “Applying to Harvard is not an essay writing contest.” As per our MBA applications and admissions guide , people are accepted to MBA programs not on the quality of the writing, but on the quality of the thinking that went into the essay. As a result, “the perfect essay” is actually the one that answers the question based on your perspective and experiences.
By focusing on these broad categories, you can avoid some of the pitfalls of the essay writing process. Try to keep in mind what your overall MBA story is and don’t get lost in some of the things that don’t matter, such as “sample essays” or figuring out the exact language you are going to use.
Remember, the best application essay is the one that addresses the question in a way that is tied in to your personal experience.
Discover what sets standout MBA application essays apart from the crowd with expert guidance from our experienced MBA admissions consulting team .
Read more on MBA essays
- Taking the Stress out of the MBA Essay Writing Process
- Best strategies for the Harvard MBA Essay
- What Matters Most: Conquering the Stanford GSB Essay A
- Give & Take in the Wharton MBA Essays
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20 must-read mba essay tips.
Business school admissions committees care about more than (just) your GMAT scores and GPA —they want to know who you are and why you belong in their program . Your MBA essays are your best chance to sell the person behind the résumé. They should tie all the pieces of your business school application together and create a comprehensive picture of who you are, what you've done, and what you bring to the table. Here's a roundup of our best MBA essay tips to keep in mind as you begin to write.
How to Write an Unforgettable B-School Essay
1. communicate that you are a proactive, can-do sort of person..
Business schools want leaders, not applicants content with following the herd.
2. Put yourself on ego-alert.
Stress what makes you unique, not what makes you number one.
3. Communicate specific reasons why you're great fit for each school.
Simply stating "I am the ideal candidate for your program" won't convince the admission committee to push you into the admit pile.
Read More: Find Your Business School
4. Bring passion to your writing.
Admissions officers want to know what excites you. And if you'll bring a similar enthusiasm to the classroom.
5. Break the mold.
Challenge perceptions with unexpected essays that say, "There's more to me than you think."
6. If you've taken an unorthodox path to business school, play it up.
Admissions officers appreciate risk-takers.
7. Talk about your gender, ethnicity, minority status or foreign background....
But only if it has affected your outlook or experiences.
8. Fill your essays with plenty of real-life examples.
Specific anecdotes and vivid details make a much greater impact than general claims and broad summaries.
9. Demonstrate a sense of humor or vulnerability.
You're a real person, and it's okay to show it!
BONUS: Don't Make These MBA Essay Mistakes
1. write about your high school glory days. .
Admissions committees don't care if you were editor of the yearbook or captain of the varsity team. They expect their candidates to have moved onto more current, professional achievements.
2. Submit essays that don't answer the questions.
An off-topic essay, or one that merely restates your résumé, will frustrate and bore the admissions committee. More importantly, it won't lead to any new insight about you.
Attend UNC's top-ranked online MBA program without putting your career on hold. See how.
3. Fill essays with industry jargon.
Construct your essays with only enough detail about your job to frame your story and make your point.
4. Reveal half-baked reasons for wanting the MBA.
Admissions officers favor applicants who have well-defined goals. However unsure you are about your future, it's critical that you demonstrate that you have a plan.
5. Exceed the recommended word limits.
This suggests you don't know how to follow directions, operate within constraints or organize your thoughts.
6. Submit an application full of typos and grammatical errors.
A sloppy application suggests a sloppy attitude.
7. Send one school an essay intended for another—or forget to change the school name when using the same essay for several applications.
Admissions committees are (understandably) insulted when they see another school's name or forms.
8. Make excuses.
If your undergraduate experience was one long party, be honest. Discuss how you've matured, both personally and professionally.
9. Be impersonal in the personal statement.
Many applicants avoid the personal like the plague. Instead of talking about how putting themselves through school lowered their GPA, they talk about the rising cost of tuition in America. Admissions officers want to know about YOU.
Read More: How to Ace Your MBA Interview
10. Make too many generalizations.
An essay full of generalizations is a giveaway that you don't have anything to say.
11. Write in a vacuum.
Make sure that each of your essays reinforce and build on the others to present a consistent and compelling representation of who you are, what you've done, and what you bring to the table.
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12 Effective “Why This College?” Essay Examples
What’s covered.
- Essay 1: UPenn Nursing
- Essay 2: UPenn
- Essay 3: UW Madison
- Essay 4: Northwestern
- Essay 5: NYU
- Essay 6: NYU
- Essay 7: Boston University
- Essay 8: Boston University
- Essay 9: Tufts
- Essay 10: Tufts
- Essay 11: Georgia Tech
- Essay 12: Georgia Tech
Where to Get Your Essays Edited
The “ Why This College?” essay is one of the most common supplemental prompts. These school-specific essays help colleges understand if you’re a good fit for them, and if they’re a good fit for you.
In this post, we’ll share 12 “Why This College?” essay examples from real students and explain what they did well, and what could be improved. Read these examples to understand how to write a strong supplemental essay that improves your chances of acceptance.
Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized.
Essay Example #1: UPenn Nursing
Prompt: How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying (650 words).
Sister Simone Roach, a theorist of nursing ethics, said, “caring is the human mode of being.” I have long been inspired by Sister Roach’s Five C’s of Caring: commitment, conscience, competence, compassion, and confidence. Penn both embraces and fosters these values through a rigorous, interdisciplinary curriculum and unmatched access to service and volunteer opportunities.
COMMITMENT. Reading through the activities that Penn Quakers devote their time to (in addition to academics!) felt like drinking from a firehose in the best possible way. As a prospective nursing student with interests outside of my major, I value this level of flexibility. I plan to leverage Penn’s liberal arts curriculum to gain an in-depth understanding of the challenges LGBT people face, especially regarding healthcare access. Through courses like “Interactional Processes with LGBT Individuals” and volunteering at the Mazzoni Center for outreach, I hope to learn how to better support the Penn LGBT community as well as my family and friends, including my cousin, who came out as trans last year.
CONSCIENCE. As one of the first people in my family to attend a four-year university, I wanted a school that promoted a sense of moral responsibility among its students. At Penn, professors challenge their students to question and recreate their own set of morals by sparking thought- provoking, open-minded discussions. I can imagine myself advocating for universal healthcare in courses such as “Health Care Reform & Future of American Health System” and debating its merits with my peers. Studying in an environment where students confidently voice their opinions – conservative or liberal – will push me to question and strengthen my value system.
COMPETENCE. Two aspects that drew my attention to Penn’s BSN program were its high-quality research opportunities and hands-on nursing projects. Through its Office of Nursing Research, Penn connects students to faculty members who share similar research interests. As I volunteered at a nursing home in high school, I hope to work with Dr. Carthon to improve the quality of care for senior citizens. Seniors, especially minorities, face serious barriers to healthcare that I want to resolve. Additionally, Penn’s unique use of simulations to bridge the gap between classroom learning and real-world application impressed me. Using computerized manikins that mimic human responses, classes in Penn’s nursing program allow students to apply their emergency medical skills in a mass casualty simulation and monitor their actions afterward through a video system. Participating in this activity will help me identify my strengths and areas for improvement regarding crisis management and medical care in a controlled yet realistic setting. Research opportunities and simulations will develop my skills even before I interact with patients.
COMPASSION. I value giving back through community service, and I have a particular interest in Penn’s Community Champions and Nursing Students For Sexual & Reproductive Health (NSRH). As a four-year volunteer health educator, I hope to continue this work as a Community Champions member. I am excited to collaborate with medical students to teach fourth and fifth graders in the city about cardiology or lead a chair dance class for the elders at the LIFE Center. Furthermore, as a feminist who firmly believes in women’s abortion rights, I’d like to join NSRH in order to advocate for women’s health on campus. At Penn, I can work with like-minded people to make a meaningful difference.
CONFIDENCE. All of the Quakers that I have met possess one defining trait: confidence. Each student summarized their experiences at Penn as challenging but fulfilling. Although I expect my coursework to push me, from my conversations with current Quakers I know it will help me to be far more effective in my career.
The Five C’s of Caring are important heuristics for nursing, but they also provide insight into how I want to approach my time in college. I am eager to engage with these principles both as a nurse and as a Penn Quaker, and I can’t wait to start.
What the Essay Did Well
This essay has many positive aspects, but the most impressive one is the structure. Utilizing the Five C’s of Caring to discuss Penn’s offerings was a genius way of tying in this student’s passion for nursing while also making their essay exciting and easy to read. Beginning each paragraph with the respective adjective helped focus the paragraph and allowed the student to demonstrate how they exemplify each quality without explicitly stating it. The student wasn’t afraid to think outside the box and add creativity to their essay structure, which really paid off.
Another positive is how specific and specialized the Penn resources and opportunities the student mentions are. This essay did not fall into the trap of name-dropping professors or programs. In every paragraph, there was a connection to something the student wants to do at Penn to further themselves in the respective characteristic they were describing.
Not only did this student mention a resource at Penn—whether it was a professor, a class, or a club—in every paragraph, but they elaborated on what that resource was and how it would help them achieve their goal of becoming a nurse. The what and how is what sets this essay apart from other supplements that just name-drop resources for the sake of it. The amount of detail this essay went into about some of these resources makes it clear to the admissions officers reading the essay that this student has seriously looked into Penn and has a strong desire to come to campus and use these resources.
What Could Be Improved
One thing this essay could do to make it stronger is improve the first paragraph. The student does a good job of setting up Sister Roach and the Five C’s, but they don’t mention anything about their desire to study or pursue nursing. The first paragraph mentions both Sister Roach and Penn, but left out the student. This could be fixed by simply adding something along the lines of “I can’t wait to embody these values as a nursing student at Penn” to the paragraph.
Essay Example #2: UPenn
Prompt: Considering the specific undergraduate school you have selected, how will you explore your academic and intellectual interests at the University of Pennsylvania? For students applying to the coordinated dual-degree and specialized programs, please answer these questions in regard to your single-degree school choice; your interest in the coordinated dual-degree or specialized program may be addressed through the program-specific essay. (300-450 words)
I always loved watching the worms when it rained. I used to put my little raincoat on, sit on the doorsteps, and watch them move toward the puddles. My younger brother, forever intent on destroying the world around him, would try to stomp on the worms, and I would run after him screaming. In my imagination, the brain looked like a pile of squiggly worms. However, my neuroscience curiosity has since grown beyond a worm’s habits.
For example, my mother thought that I was insane when I wanted to watch American Murder: The Family Next Door . To her immense relief, I was interested in the psychology of the criminal rather than the crime itself. Although neuroscience is my primary interest, I also hope to learn more about the intersection between law and medicine at the UPenn College of Arts and Sciences. I’ve been able to explore this topic through various projects at school such as presentations on juvenile crime and the death penalty.
At the University of Pennsylvania, I look forward to taking classes like Forensic Neuroscience (BIBB 050) as well as Neuroscience and Society (PSYC 247) both of which directly combine my two interests. Hopefully, the Take Your Professor to Dinner program resumes as I would make sure to talk to Dr. Daniel Langleben about his research on forensic functional brain imaging over a meal of Philly cheesesteaks.
I also hope to participate in the Race, Science, and Society Program where I can discover how race biases and neuroscience go hand-in-hand and contribute to the fight against racism. The Beyond Arrests: Re-Thinking Systematic-Oppression Group immediately caught my attention while looking at Penn’s opportunities to engage in relevant dialogue. My fascination with the criminal system began with reading Fyodor Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment , and Penn will both fuel that curiosity as well as introduce new questions about the world of justice reform.
As an eight-year Latin scholar and a five-time reader of the Percy Jackson franchise, I would like to take classes in the Penn Classical Studies department where I can learn more about the impact of ancient cultures on society today. Classes such as Greek and Roman Medicine (CLST 271) would intersect my interests in medicine and classical civilizations.
Although I do harbor a deep love for Philly cheesesteaks and enjoyment of running in strange places like the Woodlands Cemetery, the range of programs to support my diverse interests and unmatched opportunities to put learning into action make me confident that the University of Pennsylvania is the best university for me to succeed.
The real strength in the essay lies in the sheer number of details this student is able to include in a short space, without sacrificing style and flow. The first two paragraphs really have nothing to do with Penn, but the inclusion of them makes this response feel like an essay, rather than a list of offerings at Penn. Striking the balance is important, and the anecdote at the beginning ultimately humanizes the writer.
From the three unique courses to the specific professor and his research to the race and criminal justice programs, this student has clearly done their homework on Penn! The key to this essay’s success isn’t just mentioning the offerings at Penn that excite the student, but the context that explains how each opportunity fits into the student’s academic interests.
Adding book titles like Crime and Punishment and Percy Jackson to support their passion for the criminal justice system and classics are extra details that help us learn more about how this student pursues their passions outside of the classroom. Finding little ways to humanize yourself throughout the essay can take it from good to great.
One area of improvement for this essay is the structure. It follows a very traditional “ Why This College? ” framework—start with an anecdote, then discuss classes, and then extracurriculars and programs—that gets old quickly for admissions officers.
A great way to add some spice to the format would be to use a sample schedule for the day. This essay mentions three different classes, two different groups, and a Take Your Professor to Dinner opportunity. Together, that’s the recipe for a full day at UPenn!
There are a few ways to play around with an essay that follows a typical day-in-the-life. Maybe each paragraph starts with a time and explains what they do during that hour. Maybe they narrate walking through campus on their way from one class to the next and what they just learned. However they choose to go about it, adding in a playful spin to the traditional essay structure is one of the best ways to instantly set an essay apart from the crowd.
Essay Example #3: UW Madison
Prompt: Tell us why you decided to apply to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In addition, please include why you are interested in studying the major(s) you have selected. If you selected undecided, please describe your areas of possible academic interest. (650 words)
Essay – # Day 117
7:30 am… As I open my eyes, I look at the pinboard in front of my bed. Written in red block letters are two of the many goals of my life: “Make life better and more independent for the Visually impaired; Inspire kids to explore the field of STEM, making them the future problem solvers.“
Keeping these goals afresh in mind, I freshen up and prepare for the first class of the day, ECE 533 Image Processing. As the professor explains the Applications of Image Processing in Computer Vision, a light bulb sparks in my mind. I can modify the head contraption of PERIPHIS to identify objects in peripheral vision and alert the wearer via an earpiece using Text to Speech (TTS).
After the class, I see Professor Mohit Gupta at the WISION Lab, where he shares his insights from the Block World Cameras system, which helps to geometrize 3D Man-made environments. We brainstorm ways we can implement this system on PERIPHIS.
Deep in the discussion and intrigued by my curiosity, he asked me where my interest in this niche field sparked during high school, and then I recount the incident from 9th grade:
“In Hindi – Agar aaj mere paas paise hote to ye din na dekhna padta” (If I had money, I would not have had to see this day.)
These were the words of Aadiya, a glaucoma patient, who couldn’t help but cry in despair as she injured herself in an accident just because she couldn’t sense the incoming traffic. During my visit to “Baroda Association for Blind (BAB)” for a survey, I saw and experienced firsthand how hard and inaccessible it is for an underprivileged visually impaired to locomote without anyone’s assistance.
What happened next was my first adventure into the world of Computer Science and Engineering. I dedicated the next four years to find an affordable solution to a pressing problem. It was called PERIPHIS, a smart wearable that helps alert the visually impaired wearer of impending danger while locomoting.
When I finally presented this device to Aadiya, the smile on her face made me realize how big an impact technology can make in one’s life.
11:00 am… As I head to the Engineering Hall to complete my assignments of COMP SCI 570
Introduction to Human-Computer Interaction, I crossways with my roommate from the Chadbourne Residential College, who is also interested in researching applications of Computer Vision in real life. We fix a time to chat later.
1:20pm… After a quick bite, I head to Human-Computer Interaction Laboratory. I expand my knowledge on different applications of Computer Science to make human life better than I found. I get fascinated when I see a few students building a child-friendly humanoid robot to teach kids the principles of Coding and AI. I hop in and share insights from my experience of being the President at AiGoLearning and kindling interest in STEM for young children. I explain how crucial the UI is when it comes to technology for the young.
5:00pm… To blow off some steam and socialize, I meet up with my fellow countrymen and artists at the Indian Graduate Students’ Association. We discuss and plan the upcoming Diwali Night Music at Shannon Hall. I feel proud to share my national identity while bringing out my musical self by contributing as a Tabla player at the student organization.
As I close my day, I reflect and think of the most unique resource at UW. It is not the labs, research facilities, classes, but the people, including the professors and students, all aligned to a single goal: “Solving problems to make society a better place.”
10:00pm… I find my way back to my dorm room and write with red block letters on my pinboard: “Meet with at least 1 Badger every day and gain new insight from them.”
This essay is a stellar example. The day in the life formatting is a common way to spice up your “Why This College?” essay, but the way this writer executes it is nearly flawless.
Opening with the vision board makes the student’s college goals clear from the very start, and this was cleverly done since vision boards are naturally one of the first things you see when you wake up.
The student then takes us to specific courses and labs and shares their thoughts on how they could improve their invention, PERIPHIS. The author seamlessly includes background information on PERIPHIS by including this hypothetical conversation with a professor who speaks their native language.
As we go through the day, we can see that this student will not only be involved academically, but also socially. We learn how important their culture is to them and how they plan to share it with the campus community.
This essay does everything a “Why This College?” essay should: it shares the student’s goals and motivations behind them, how the university can support those goals, and how the student will engage with the campus beyond academics.
There’s not much this essay could improve, besides a few formatting and wording issues. The first line of this essay—“ Essay – # Day 117”—is a great attention-grabber, but the placement of the # symbol is confusing and perhaps should’ve been in front of the number.
There are also a couple spots where wording is a bit awkward, such as these lines:
I crossways with my roommate from the Chadbourne Residential College, who is also interested in researching applications of Computer Vision in real life. We fix a time to chat later.
It should instead say something like “I run into my roommate” and “We schedule a time”. This is likely due to English not being the student’s native language, but could’ve easily been caught by proofreading from a native speaker.
Essay Example #4: Northwestern
Prompt: While other parts of your application give us a sense of who you are, we are also excited to hear more about how you see yourself engaging with the larger Northwestern community.
In 300 words or less, help us understand how you might engage specific resources, opportunities, and/or communities here. We are curious about what these specifics are, as well as how they may enrich your time at Northwestern and beyond.
For as long as I can remember, I have seen my parents, both farmers, struggling to produce food because of the challenges presented by the environment. Joining Northwestern’s community, and majoring in Environmental Engineering, will allow me to understand what are the reasons behind climate change and learn how to stop them and/or prevent them from happening.
Having witnessed how plant diseases affect crops, I would like to collaborate in the PLANT-Dx project and in its widespread application. I strongly believe that it will be able to help farmers to improve the quality and quantity of their production, and reduce famine around the world. At some point in my education, I want to take advantage of the study-abroad programs Northwestern has to offer and learn about farming practices in a different part of the world. In addition, I want to conduct research on sustainable alternative farming methods that adapt to the new environmental conditions and that can be practiced in countries with fewer resources.
Apart from having access to outstanding professors, rigorous academics, and cutting-edge research resources, I will be able to be part of a close-knit community genuinely curious about others’ activities, truly passionate about what they do, and not afraid to step out of their comfort zone to make of this world a better place. Being part of Engineers for a Sustainable World at Northwestern will allow me to get to know people that share one of my passions in addition to learning and teaching how to apply sustainable practices in daily life.
I am already looking forward to marching through the Weber Arch.
This essay is extremely cohesive, as it focuses on the student’s agricultural background and desire to study environmental engineering. The student mentions a couple resources specific to Northwestern, such as the PLANT-Dx project and Engineers for a Sustainable World.
Because of the background information the student provided, their motivations for participating in these opportunities is also clear. We can see that Northwestern would be a school that would help them achieve their goals.
There are two main aspects of the essay that could be improved: the writing and its specificity.
To begin with, the intro paragraph is a bit clunky and vague. The student should have specified the challenges the environment has presented to their parents’ farming with detailed imagery about droughts or torrential rain. The final sentence about climate change is also much too broad, and the student should’ve stated a goal in a smaller niche of environmentalism.
For example, here’s what a rewritten strong intro paragraph might look like:
The drought this year was bad, and the once-flourishing tomato crops on my family’s farm were afflicted with Southern Blight. As my family and our community struggled to put food on the table for the third year in a year, I resolved to major in Environmental Engineering at Northwestern to learn how to preserve our agriculture in the face of climate change.
Another writing error is the typo in the final paragraph, where they write “to make of this world a better place”. It’s important to proofread your essay and have others help you proofread as well!
Finally, while the essay mentions a couple specific Northwestern resources, the other resources they mention are too vague. The student could’ve improved by mentioning a specific study abroad program and a current research project on sustainable alternative farming methods. Most colleges let you study abroad and conduct research, so you need to explain why Northwestern is the best place for your goals.
Essay Example #5: NYU
Prompt: We would like to know more about your interest in NYU. What motivated you to apply to NYU? Why have you applied or expressed interest in a particular campus, school, college, program, and or area of study? If you have applied to more than one, please also tell us why you are interested in these additional areas of study or campuses. We want to understand – Why NYU? (400 words)
“A futuristic way of looking at academics,” the student panelist said during a New York University virtual information session. I reflected on a conversation I had with my grandma; she couldn’t understand how her vegetarian granddaughter could build a career in the food industry. However much I tried convincing her that vegetarianism was the future, as it offers substantial benefits to the environment and can offer health benefits to a growing population with the same environmental resources, she insisted that tofu would never provide the same satiation as meat. She was raised in a community where meat consumption was embedded in the culture, and its production is a large part of the country’s economy. In contrast, I had the privilege of living a few steps from San Francisco, with many restaurants and grocery stores dedicated to plant-based meat alternatives. Trying innovative recipes and products eventually allowed me to develop my own recipes. Upon my move to Nicaragua, where my grandmother is from, I found my food options to be limited, expensive and hard to find. So I developed my own small-scale solutions that did not break the bank and satiated grandma.
An institution that implements forward-thinking is what I need to reach my goals of changing the future of plant-based diets and people’s views on vegetarianism. NYU’s Nutrition and Food Studies program offers multiple disciplines of food studies that I will apply to my aspirations as a vegetarian. I plan to study under Adjunct Faculty Kayleen St. John, whose success in the plant-based industry and her teaching of the ‘Foundations of Plant-Based Nutrition’ in The Vegetarian Times excites me. The variety of classes like Introduction to Food History, Food Photography, and Food Systems: Food & Agriculture will give me an overview of what is available in the food industry to be prepared for all fields. Not to be cliche, but NYU’s proximity to the city is essential for the rapidly changing vegetarian industry. The multiculturalism available in NYC and NYU will allow me to understand the food system and diets of various cultures, religions, and areas. I can explore the extremes of the food industry, from fancy restaurants to public school cafeterias. These juxtapositions, much like the one I experienced after my move to Nicaragua, will allow me to broaden my reach and demonstrate that the vegetarian diet is not something reserved for select groups but a diet attainable to all.
A core strength of this essay is the fact it takes its time to provide the reader with ample background on why this student is interested in nutrition and food studies and how they have grappled with difficult questions and surrounding this topic in the past. It’s okay to not mention anything about NYU for a whole paragraph if you are using that space to bring depth to your interests and tell the reader the crucial backstory behind pursuing your intended degree.
Another positive aspect is the inclusion of New York City for a purposeful reason. NYU admissions officers read thousands of essays that just talk about living in NYC for the sake of NYC—this is not what they want to hear. In contrast, this essay focuses on the vast and lively food scene in New York that the student considers to be an invaluable asset to her NYU education. This is a time where including New York actually plays to the appeal of NYU, rather than making it seem like the student is simply applying for the city.
Finally, this student clearly demonstrates that they are someone who wants to change the world for the better, but through their personal niche. NYU is looking for people who express this desire to be a changemaker, but oftentimes sweeping statements like “I want to change the world” come across as vague and disingenuous. The essay does mention changing diets and looking to the future, but it is focused within the student’s specific area of interest, making the claim to change the world more determined and authentic.
This essay could be made stronger if there was a bit more personal reflection included. The first paragraph provides a lot of details on the student’s vegetarianism and how it conflicts with her grandmother and her heritage. What it doesn’t include very much of is how the student thinks and feels about her diet being at odds with that of her family.
Does this student feel they are betraying their heritage by being vegetarian? What emotions do they feel when people criticize vegetarianism? Why did they go vegetarian in the first place? Probing questions like these that get to the emotional core behind the story in the first paragraph would really help to build out this student’s backstory. We want to understand what their emotional responses and reasoning processes look like, so finding ways to include those into an already expositive paragraph would further bolster this essay.
Essay Example #6: NYU
My mother never takes off her Cartier necklace that my father gave her 10 years ago on their anniversary. As a child, I didn’t fully understand this attachment. However, on my 15th birthday, my aunt gifted me a ring, which was uniquely designed and made up of three rings linked together. Wearing it every day and making sure I would never lose it, I didn’t treat it like my easily replaceable childhood necklaces; it was my piece of luxury. This sparked my deep curiosity for the luxury world. The niche strives to provide the finest and most memorable experiences, as equally as my Japanese attention to detail and my French appreciation towards aesthetic beauty. In a constantly shifting environment, I learned that luxury chases timeless excellence.
NYU Stern’s BS in business and a co-concentration in management and marketing will fully immerse me in the business side of luxury fashion that I aim to pursue a future career in. The luxury marketing track, offered only by NYU, will enable me to assemble the most suited classes to reflect my interests. Specifically, NYU Stern’s exciting electives such as The Dynamics of the Fashion Industry seminar and Brand Strategy & Planning will encourage me to develop the skills that I was introduced to and grew keen on when running a virtual sustainable fashion auction.
As someone who has moved around from Paris to Tokyo, to Chicago and now Athens, I thrive in meeting and collaborating with others from diverse backgrounds. The school’s strong global outlook, demonstrated through Stern’s International Business Exchange Program, further sets NYU apart for me, as it is crucial to building essential soft skills. This opportunity allows me to experience new cultural approaches to luxury business which I can bring back with me to New York, and therefore push me to become a well-rounded business student. Similarly, I am excited to take part in the array of student clubs offered, such as the Luxury and Retail Association (LARA), which I learned about after connecting with and talking to current students. Seeing past talks from employers of companies like Conde Nast, I am eager to learn outside of the classroom from future speakers.
Finding myself in new situations constantly, I always seek new challenges and explorations – to me, it is clear that NYU Stern will push me to create the finest and most unique learning experiences of timeless excellence.
This essay has an amazing introduction paragraph. It doesn’t mention anything about NYU or what this student is planning on studying, which is what makes it so intriguing. The reader doesn’t know where this student is headed after making such a seemingly unrelated statement about jewelry, but we want to find out.
Not only does this essay immediately capture the reader’s attention, it maintains a succinct and direct tone that helps the reader effortlessly flow from one paragraph to the next. The student chose to include three opportunities at NYU that excite them and fully elaborate on them. This serves as an excellent example of more is less.
We aren’t bombarded with a laundry list of classes, professors, and clubs the student wants to take. Instead, the student took a focused approach and described why they were excited by each offering they highlighted. Going deeper into a smaller number of opportunities at the college still shows this student did their research, but it allows for their backstory and goals to be discussed in far greater detail.
While this student does a good job of elaborating, they also mention a few key aspects of their personality as throw-away lines, when it would have been great to elaborate further on them. For example, they mention running a virtual sustainable fashion auction (cool!), but don’t provide us with any details on what that actually entails, how they got involved with it, what they enjoyed about it, etc. They also mention moving around a lot in the context of developing a diverse perspective, but they don’t include any emotional insight into what that was like.
Although there are only 400 words available, and you don’t want to spend too much time discussing the past, it would be nice to see just a sentence or two that delves into the details of this student’s background. The fashion auction and moving around clearly had an impact on the student, so we want to know what that was. If they are choosing to include these details, they must be important in the student’s decision to pursue business at NYU, so they shouldn’t be afraid to divulge the emotional significance to the reader.
Essay Example #7: Boston University
Prompt: In no more than 250 words, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what specifically has led you to apply for admission.
Boston University’s College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) attracts me because of its support of interdisciplinary study among its wide array of majors. In fact, the CAS now offers a course that combines biology, chemistry, and neuroscience. As I hope to conduct medical research into brain disorders, I plan to pursue all three areas of study. These cross-disciplinary connections at BU will prepare me to do so.
CAS’s undergraduate research program would allow me to work with a mentor, such as Dr. Alice Cronin-Golomb or Dr. Robert M.G. Reinhart related to their research on neurological disorders. With them, I can advance the work I have already completed related to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). In a summer class at our local university, my partner and I extracted data from fMRI and PET studies and inputted them into a coding program. We then created an indicator map, which we imported into another software program, AFNI, to display significant activity in the brain regions affected by DID. Seeing the representation of our data thrilled me because I knew it could eventually help people who live with DID. I want to experience that feeling again. Successfully analyzing these fMRI and PET studies and learning to code drives me to pursue more research opportunities, and this desire motivates me to study at a university that offers research opportunities to undergraduates. BU’s interdisciplinary approach to psychology and support for independent undergraduate research will optimally prepare me for a career as a neurological researcher.
This student clearly outlines BU-specific resources (the interdisciplinary course and undergrad research program), plus how these resources align with their professional goals (to become a neurological researcher). They do name professors, but since their work clearly relates to the student’s interests, it doesn’t look disingenuous, and shows that the student has done research on their fit with BU. The student also provides background on why they want to pursue research, and shows that they already have experience, which makes their interest in the undergrad research program more concrete.
The only thing missing from this essay is the student’s fit with BU in terms of extracurriculars and social life. “Why This College?” essays should also cover extracurriculars, as colleges are also interested in how you’ll contribute to their community.
In general, these essays should be academic-leaning (especially if they’re under 250 words), but you should still address some social aspects of the college that appeal to you (we recommend about 70% academics, 30% social, with more or less focus on social aspects depending on the word count).
Since the student probably already detailed their previous research in their Common App activities section, they could’ve just summarized their research background in one sentence (instead of 78 words, which is 31% of the total word count!), and used that valuable space to talk about a specific social aspect of BU that interests them.
Essay Example #8: Boston University
Prompt: In no more than 250 words, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what specifically has led you to apply for admission.
I am fascinated by research, though completely uninterested in the disciplines traditionally associated with it, such as STEM fields. I need to find a school that will balance my desire to conduct research with my interest in political science.
While many schools boast in-depth student research programs for those looking to cure diseases or develop solutions to global warming, few tout their support for humanities research. Additionally, many universities that do allocate funding to social science research typically reserve these monies for graduate students or upperclassmen. BU, with the help of its Undergraduate Research Opportunities Program, will allow me to conduct research on the topics that most intrigue me, such as gender disparity in politics, or the relationship between dominant parties in power and the country’s economy and involvement in foreign affairs. Furthermore, I can begin these studies as early as my first year. Not only can I take classes with professors like Sandra McEvoy or Dino Christenson to develop my interests in a classroom setting, but I could also work with one of them to develop new knowledge in the topics that we both enjoy learning about. With this knowledge base and experience conducting studies with top professors in a respected research institution, I will be well-prepared for my future law career. I want to learn in an environment that encourages independent study no matter one’s field of interest or experience, and BU’s support of intellectual curiosity for all of its students makes it a perfect fit for me.
This student knows exactly what they want, and they’re not afraid to state it bluntly. Their intro paragraph is totally honest about their interests (or lack of interest), and we immediately understand one of their main college goals: to conduct political science research.
The student mentions a specific resource, the Undergraduate Research Opportunities Program, as well as an alignment with BU’s value of encouraging independent study in all fields. Showing alignment with a specific value of the university is a great way to take your essay to the next level.
This essay shows us that the student would be a great fit for BU and would take advantage of its research opportunities.
The writer mentions some of their research interests, but doesn’t explain the motivation behind them. We don’t actually learn very much about the student themself, which is a common flaw of “Why This College?” essays. The essay would’ve been stronger if they’d explained why they’re interested in “gender disparity in politics, or the relationship between dominant parties in power and the country’s economy and involvement in foreign affairs.” For example, maybe they feel strongly about abortion rights and are upset about the way men have been legislating women’s rights.
The student also names two professors whose classes they’d like to take and with whom they’d like to do research, but we aren’t told which classes they’re interested in, or which topics they could cover together. You want to avoid “name-dropping” professors without context in your essay. If the student shared the names of specific classes or research topics and why they’re interested in them, that would’ve strengthened their essay.
Essay Example #9: Tufts
Prompt: Why Tufts? (100 words)
When Deanne, Tufts’ admissions counselor, visited my school, she immediately caught my attention by emphasizing Tufts’ diverse yet unified campus. Tufts’ inclusive definition of diversity goes beyond merely recruiting students from a variety of backgrounds. Tufts seeks to integrate these categories of diversity and pushes its students to learn from one another. One such intersectional program that attracts me is CAFE (Conversation, Action, Faith, and Education). By joining CAFE, a community that promotes interfaith education, I will learn from my peers, become more understanding of other religious backgrounds, and apply this broader understanding to my academic work at Tufts.
It’s hard to write a “Why This College?” essay in 100 words. This essay does a good job sticking to one unique element of Tufts—its intersectionality. Since Tufts also cares about demonstrated interest, it’s great that the student also mentioned speaking with an admissions counselor.
We unfortunately don’t learn very much about the student from this essay. Why do they care about diversity and interfaith programs? How does this relate to their academic and career goals? While the word count is super short, they could’ve cut these lines and jumped right into the specific resource they’re interested in: Tufts’ inclusive definition of diversity goes beyond merely recruiting students from a variety of backgrounds. Tufts seeks to integrate these categories of diversity and pushes its students to learn from one another.
Here’s an example of a stronger version of this essay:
When a Tufts admissions counselor visited my school, she immediately caught my attention by emphasizing Tufts’ diverse yet unified campus. As a Muslim hoping to go into International Relations, I want to attend a school that not only recruits diverse students, but pushes them to learn from one another. I hope to join intersectional programs such as CAFE (Conversation, Action, Faith, and Education). By joining this community that promotes interfaith education, I will gain the necessary perspective and compassion to become a human rights lawyer in countries with religious conflict, such as my homeland Azerbaijan.
Essay Example #10: Tufts
Prompt: Why Tufts? (100 words)
Someday I hope to conduct medical research in developing countries; Tufts attracts me because of its wide array of majors it offers and support for undergraduate research. To understand the human brain, I hope to study biology, neuroscience, and psychology. In addition to outstanding faculty in each of these areas, Tufts also organizes initiatives including the International Research Program. Through this program, I would work with other students and faculty members on an international project related to brain diseases. This opportunity will give me a taste of my future career and help me narrow the scope of my later studies.
This essay does a better job of sharing the student’s goals with us compared to the previous Tufts essay. We learn that the applicant is interested in medical research in developing countries on brain diseases, and that Tufts has a program to support international research.
The essay still mentions some resources that could apply to many schools, which is not an effective use of the tiny word count. For example, they say: “Tufts attracts me because of its wide array of majors it offers and support for undergraduate research” and they mention the “outstanding faculty” in the fields they plan to study.
They also don’t tell us their motivation behind studying brain diseases abroad, and it feels like there’s a significant story there. Giving some background would’ve further strengthened their essay.
Finally, they mention that they still need to narrow the scope of their studies; while it’s fine to be undecided on your career and majors, you don’t need to spend your precious word count saying that in your essay. They could’ve instead shared a couple potential avenues they’re considering.
Here’s what the student could’ve written instead:
Outcomes for schizophrenia patients are better in developing countries than in developed ones. I hope to research the reasons behind this and improve the treatment options in the US for the cousin I grew up with. In college, I want to study biology, neuroscience, and psychology. Tufts attracts me because of its unique interdisciplinary BS in Cognitive and Brain Science and its International Research Program. Through this program, I could do the research I’ve dreamt of doing with a faculty member and other students, preparing me for my future career as either a researcher or clinician.
Essay Example #11: Georgia Tech
Prompt: Why do you want to study your chosen major specifically at Georgia Tech? (300 words)
Climate change is a human rights issue.
There the headline was, screaming on my phone screen. I think about those suffering from a lack of clean water. I think about those suffering from a lack of clean air.
I often think back to that headline – it’s what drives my passion for environmental engineering. As an environmental engineer, I can mitigate air pollution and design water treatment systems that address the water injustices that people face. However, it’s not just about creating a technology that cleans water; it’s about changing people’s lives. New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech’s research on creating a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those in need of improved sanitation aligns perfectly with my interests.
At Georgia Tech, through the student-led organization, Engineers for a Sustainable World and the InVenture Prize, I can translate the knowledge gained from my classes into a concrete vision. I can design and implement hands-on sustainability projects around Atlanta and invent a water sanitation system for the on-site acquisition of clean water.
Georgia Tech can also provide me with ample research opportunities, such as the broad area of Healthy Communities in the School of Civil and Environmental Engineering. I can further pursue my interest in developing solutions to deliver clean water while welcoming new areas of inquiry. An area I would like to explore would be the controlling of dangerous matter in the air to reduce health hazards; reducing the impact of climate change is of utmost importance to me.
Studying environmental engineering at Georgia Tech would well prepare me to develop solutions to climate-related issues. With the countless opportunities that Georgia Tech has to offer, I know there is nowhere else where I can receive a better environmental engineering education.
What the Essay Did Well l
This essay begins with an attention-grabbing statement that leaves the reader wondering how this will relate to the student’s interest in Georgia Tech. They then transition seamlessly into how climate change and human rights motivate their desire to become an environmental engineer.
The student mentions several resources specific to Georgia Tech that would help them achieve their goals, such as the research on the toilet turning waste into water, Engineers for a Sustainable World, InVenture Prize, and Healthy Communities research. It’s clear that they did their research and have reflected on their fit with the campus community.
They end the essay explicitly stating that Georgia Tech is the best place for them to grow, and the reader is certainly convinced of this by the end.
This essay is quite strong, so there’s not much that the student could’ve improved. That said, there is one sentence that is a bit awkwardly worded: New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech’s research on creating a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those in need of improved sanitation aligns perfectly with my interests.
Instead, the student could’ve written:
New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech aligns with this value of mine and is even developing a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those who need improved sanitation.
Essay Example #12: Georgia Tech
From my first Java project, a somewhat primitive graphing calculator, I realized that CS unlocks a different way of thinking. My brain races at speeds it seldom touches with other subjects. Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve and affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application.
“Progress and Service,” Georgia Tech’s motto, tells me there’s no better place to explore my curiosity and deepen my CS skills while simultaneously helping make the world a better place, my ultimate goal for a college education.
In the classroom, I look forward to GT’s threads program, where I can tailor the curriculum to suit my career choice after exposing myself to all technical aspects of CS.
I’ll apply my specialized learning with Tech’s fascinating research opportunities. Professor Pandarinth’s brain-machine interfacing software means a lot to me. My uncle passed away from a freak accident after extensive paralysis because potential treatments were unaffordable. Exploring this revolutionary brain decoding software wouldn’t just involve me in cutting-edge artificial intelligence technology research, I’d be personally driven to ensure its success and accessibility.
I’m at my best building towards tangible results. I learned this on my robotics team using design skills to create a technically complex robot that tackles anything from shooting balls to hanging on a balance beam. I’m excited to expand my skills on the RoboJackets team, applying my career interests to build ferocious BattleBots and autonomous race robots that compete on the Indy Speedway, two events that sound ridiculously fun.
Of course, I can’t skip hackathons. These competitions molded my interest in coding so I want to give back to Georgia Tech’s Hack-Community by planning HackGT and the Catalyst Mentorship program as a member of the Hexlabs team.
The student’s passion for CS shines through this essay. They explain what they love about the subject (the problem-solving aspect) and they share that they hope to make a difference through CS, demonstrating alignment with Tech’s motto of “progress and service”.
It’s clear that this student has done their research, mentioning specific academic programs, research, and clubs. We can see that they’d be greatly engaged with the campus community.
Finally, this essay is also down-to-earth. The student doesn’t try to use impressive vocabulary or formal language. In fact, they even describe some extracurriculars as “ridiculously fun.” While you shouldn’t get too informal in your essays, this student’s casual tone in this context makes them feel more approachable and more excited about the prospect of going to Georgia Tech.
This essay has a couple sentences that are confusing to read:
Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve and affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application.
This sentence could’ve been broken up and rewritten as:
Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve. For me, the field affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application.
This sentence also uses incorrect grammar—the comma should be replaced with a semicolon:
Exploring this revolutionary brain decoding software wouldn’t just involve me in cutting-edge artificial intelligence technology research, I’d be personally driven to ensure its success and accessibility.
These details would make the essay more readable.
The organization of the essay could also be reworked. The student mentions Tech’s motto of “progress and service,” but doesn’t follow up until later with an example of how they’d use CS for the greater good. Using CS for social good isn’t ultimately the theme of their essay, so this section would’ve been better placed at the end of the paragraph about AI technology research, or at the very end of the essay. The essay actually ends abruptly, so placing the section at the end might’ve tied it up nicely, if the student could’ve placed more emphasis on how they plan to use CS to improve society.
Do you want feedback on your “Why This College” essays? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays.
If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!
Related CollegeVine Blog Posts
“Why Do You Want to Pursue an MBA?” Essay Examples
Featured Expert: Nirusan Rajakulendran, MBA
“Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay is one of the most common supplemental or optional essays. Whether you are looking to apply to Harvard Business School or the Kellogg Business School , you will need to prepare to answer this question via essay or an MBA interview question .
Some schools may indeed state that the essay is optional, but any serious candidate would be well-advised to write it.
In this post, we will help you write the “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay and increase your chances of landing that seat in the coveted program.
>> Want us to help you get accepted? Schedule a free initial consultation here <<
Article Contents 9 min read
“why do you want to pursue an mba” essay: why business schools ask for it.
At this point, you’re probably wondering why business schools even bother with such an essay. Well, there are many reasons, including:
#1 How an MBA will help your career goals
Universities don’t want to waste their time and resources on candidates who can’t fully commit to their studies. They need to select candidates who will graduate and pursue careers that will become a testimony to their alma mater.
Your essay will show them how much mettle and commitment you, the applicant, have. You can use this essay to show what getting an MBA will do for your career. It allows you to tell the admissions committee about why you’re going after an MBA – What are your motivations? What are your goals?
They can gauge your academic achievements by looking at your transcripts and GRE scores, for example. But, with this essay, you get a chance to reveal what drives you forward and what an MBA can help you with.
#2 Insight into personal character
Personal character is an important indicator of what the candidate is “made” of. The essay gives them an insight into your eligibility as a well-rounded and reliable individual.
They are looking for characteristics that make a candidate a dependable, even honorable, individual that can be relied upon to make smart decisions both in life and in their career.
Most importantly, it offers a chance for you to show the admissions officers what it is that makes you stand out from other candidates who have similar or better academic achievements and extracurricular activities.
This essay is another chance for you to stand out and remind the admissions committee of your unique skills and experiences.
#3 Shows how much the candidate wants the spot
More importantly, the admissions officers will be able to see how much you want to join the MBA program. A good “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay conveys an applicant’s eagerness, passion, and even future dedication to a career in the business field.
There are some points to consider before you start writing. To begin with, don’t veer off-topic – the essay needs to lie within the school’s word-length requirements. For example, Harvard Business School has set its application essay length at 400, Yale asks for three required essays of 300 words or less, while Kellogg School of Business asks for two essays of 450 words each. This means that every word needs to contribute towards answering the question “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” and nothing more.
Before you even start brainstorming, you need to do some research:
#1 School history
Do thorough research on the school. Find out as much as you can about its history, alumni, awards, commendations, and recognition it may have earned.
Are there any courses and classes the business school is known for and that you are interested in? Are there any faculty members lecturing at the school with whom you would like to work?
Are there any famous internship programs that can help you with achieving your career goals? Do they have a curriculum you know will teach you about a specific niche of business?
You can openly express your interest in these aspects of your future education in your essay. Showing that there is something specific that interests you in your chosen program demonstrates that you have made a careful and calculated decision. For example, you can say that a lecturer at this school is a role model with whom you would like to study. Or you can express that a specific course curriculum interests you because it is directly tied to your future career goals.
If you know someone who has graduated from your chosen MBA program, reach out to them! Send them an email or try to meet in person to ask any questions you may have. Alumni can be a great insight into the inner workings of a program. They can indicate what qualities you may want to showcase in your application and interview. Having someone on the inside is a great advantage!
#3 Extracurricular activities
University life doesn’t only involve life in the classroom. There are various on-campus activities for students to partake in. If your essay shows that you will contribute to life outside of the classroom, this may be your chance to stand out.
Business schools offer a wide range of sports, clubs, musical ensembles, theater groups, and student organizations. They always strive to enroll students with diverse interests so that they can effectively contribute to their collegial community.
What to Include in a “Why Do You Want to Pursue an MBA?” Essay
Let us move on and delve into what makes up a “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay. We will have a look at important components that help create a well-rounded essay.
Some suggestions include:
#1 Achievements
Your essay should demonstrate to the admissions officers the different accomplishments you have achieved in your education, profession, and other aspects of your life.
Proof of accomplishments can include academic awards, professional recognitions, or contests that you have entered and placed in, such as essay contests, art competitions or science fair competitions, work diplomas or awards.
To show a track record of excellence, initiative, and ambition. ","label":"Aim","title":"Aim"}]' code='tab1' template='BlogArticle'>
#2 Strengths
Your essay must demonstrate, via examples, that you can indeed be “creative”, “mature” or “skilled.” The key is to show, rather than tell the admissions committee what relevant strengths you possess that make you the perfect candidate for an MBA program. Make sure to include details and demonstrate, with examples, what makes you the right fit for your chosen MBA program and the business world in general.
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#3 International experience
If you are an MBA candidate looking to pursue a career in international business, you might want to emphasize what steps you took to prepare yourself for this path so far.
You can use the “Why do you want to pursue an MBA” essay to demonstrate your exposure to a wider world beyond your country’s borders. Whether it’s an educational or a professional experience, you can include it in this essay to show that you are serious about a global career.
Additionally, your experience abroad will demonstrate that you can get along with, learn from, and grow with peers from various countries.
To show that you have taken the necessary steps to prepare yourself for a career in international business. ","label":"Aim","title":"Aim"}]' code='tab3' template='BlogArticle'>
#4 Extracurricular activities
A healthy individual will have a well-rounded life outside of the office. Your essay can demonstrate that you have hobbies and commit to non-work-related activities. Do not make the mistake of thinking that your extracurriculars are not interesting to the admissions committee! These may be precisely the details that make you stand out from the crowd. So, if you love dancing or tutoring children in math or science, you can feel free to incorporate this in your essay!
To demonstrate commitment and dedication to your community, as well as well-roundedness and curiosity. ","label":"Aim","title":"Aim"}]' code='tab4' template='BlogArticle'>
Admissions officers want to know what the candidate is aiming for. They need to have a clear picture – even if you don’t exactly have one yet – that you are at least aiming for a few milestones in your career. Remember, you do not have to be specific. However, you can mention what aspect of the business world you want to grow in.
You can be as specific as you want to be about your goals post-MBA.
The candidate demonstrates that they have plans of putting their education to good use both in the short and long run. ","label":"Aim","title":"Aim"}]' code='tab5' template='BlogArticle'>
Do’s and Don’ts of the "Why Do You Want to Pursue an MBA?" Essay
Ok, we have come this far and the “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay is almost complete. But, we also need to see what to do and not do in the essay.
Let’s have a look:
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Don\u2019t use clich\u00e9s and generalizations or include controversial topics in your essay. "}]' code='timeline2'>
Now, let’s have a look at a sample “Why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay:
As a child, I was interested in how businesses were run. The idea of owning and growing a small business into an international conglomerate thrilled me. It is this passion that led me to want to join this esteemed institution.
My journey to pursue an MBA started during my first year in college, when I joined one of the largest banks in Canada as a Cash Counter Clerk.
Immediately, I loved that the work was demanding and required extra hours and even coming in on weekends. I learned and thrived in this environment. My communication and organizational skills that I applied in my role soon made me a reliable colleague. I managed to become Employee of the Month three times in a row without it affecting my college work. As a matter of fact, the experience at the bank helped me with creating a schedule for managing my time in college. I received several promotions at the bank while I was at college, and after graduation was also immediately offered a Supervisor position at the bank.
In my new role, I continued to develop my leadership abilities, which culminated in the $1billion move of our Finance and Auditing business from Memphis to Toronto – right in the middle of a financial system meltdown.
As a Supervisor, I used feedback from my team to make effective changes in my style of management. I allowed workers who wanted to work from home to do so as long as the deliverables and deadlines were met. This cut down on overhead in the office while also creating more relaxed, happier, and more efficient team members. My versatility and self-awareness resulted in a positive response from my team members, which was reflected in their attitudes and the quality of their work. They started putting in more hours and were more creative with their contributions. We cut costs but increased productivity.
Having worked as a Supervisor for over 4 years now, I have made the decision to pursue an MBA program to further develop my leadership and management skills. I have found that your MBA program, with its faculty and curriculum, is the exact tool I need to achieve my career goals. I hope to graduate and join the ranks of alumni like [INSERT NAME] who, after graduating from your business school went on to create ACME Intl. – one of the leaders in the business finance field. I am sure that with Professor [INSERT NAME], who teaches Leadership, Teamwork, Management, and Organizational Behavior, I will be able to build upon my experiences and take a step closer to making my dreams come true.
Want to see more MBA essay examples from top business schools?
- Harvard MBA personal statement examples
- Wharton MBA essay examples
- Columbia MBA essay examples
- Yale MBA essay examples
- Kellogg MBA essay examples
- Haas essay examples
- Kelley MBA essay examples
- Cornell MBA essay examples
- Stanford MBA personal statement examples
Writing the “why do you want to pursue an MBA?” essay might understandably seem like a daunting task – after all, it is only your future career that is hanging in the balance. But, the trick to use is to imagine oneself telling a story and then trying to capture that story in writing. It is all about conveying the story intact.
Make sure to give yourself at least 6 weeks to draft and redraft your essay. Consider reaching out to an MBA essay consultant to help you. These professionals can help you brainstorm, edit, and finalize an essay that will perfectly reflect your strengths and suitability.
The rule of thumb is to avoid using fancy fonts. The best options are Times New Roman, Arial, or Calibri in 12-point type. Also avoid using bold, italics or emojis.
Always check the university’s guidelines first. If there are none, make sure to structure your essay as an academic essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Additionally, make sure that your essay includes A 1” margin on all sides with 1.5 or double line spacing and left alignment with no justification.
Use transitional sentences to connect paragraphs. As you read your essay, it should flow from one paragraph to the next.
Always check the university’s guidelines for specific length requirements. DO NOT write more than the word limit. If there are no guidelines, stick to 400 words or so. . Remember, it’s always best to write a concise essay, so writing less than the word limit is a good strategy.
The best way to gauge if a story belongs in your essay is to imagine telling it to someone you just met a few minutes ago. How would they react? That’s probably exactly how the admissions officer reading it would react too.
If there is a teachable moment you have experienced or a lesson was learned while trying to right a wrong, then you should, by all means, include them to show that you can learn from your mistakes.
Only as much as necessary. Remember, you are submitting your essay alongside other educational documents. The admissions committee will have access to them. You, therefore, don’t need to dwell on it unless it helps with your essay – “I passed with distinction…” or “I graduated top of my class…” should be enough information.
A good way to edit your essay fully would be to spellcheck, use third-party apps to have a second run through it, read it aloud, and finally have someone else read it.
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7 tips for writing a winning mba application essay.
Nervous about your MBA admissions essay? You’re not alone! Many applicants wonder how to put their best foot forward in a business school entrance essay.
In this article, I’ll tell you what admissions committees look for in application essays and offer MBA essay tips on how to make yours stand out. We’ll also take a look at the different kinds of business school essays and a few examples of MBA essay prompts.
Why Do Business Schools Ask for Essays? What Do They Look For?
Business schools ask for essays for several reasons, all of which help admissions committees determine whether you have the skills and traits to succeed in an MBA program.
First, MBA admissions committees want to see how you write. Communication skills—including concision, clarity, style, and fluency in English—will be essential to your success in business school. One way of discerning your level of writing ability is to require an original writing sample. In an MBA essay, you have to get your point across straightforwardly, elegantly, and concisely; being able to do this is a key element of succeeding in business school and the world of business in general.
Also, MBA admissions committees want to get a sense of who you are on a more personal level. MBA application essays tell admissions officials about you not only through what you say, but in how you say it. Are you self-aware, for example, and can you reflect on past challenges or mistakes in a thoughtful way? Do you demonstrate insight into who you are and your goals? How you answer questions about yourself, your career, and your journey can help MBA admissions officials discern your level of critical thinking and personal insight.
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You can have countless accomplishments, but to succeed in business school, you’ll also need to fit in with the campus climate, work well with your peers, and contribute to campus diversity in a meaningful way. The MBA essay is a place for you to talk about the background or experiences you have that are unique to you and that you believe could differentiate you from your colleagues and/or provide a fresh perspective to campus.
Finally, essays are a way for you to showcase the qualities that most MBA programs say they are looking for in applicants, such as leadership skills, community involvement, problem-solving skills, communication skills, clear goals, and a strong sense of ethics. Some of these traits might not be readily apparent from a resume alone, and an MBA essay can be a place for you to elaborate on how you’ve cultivated them in yourself.
MBA Entrance Essay Sample Prompts
Most MBA entrance essays ask you about one of several things. Many of them are variations on similar questions: the open-ended question, the leadership question, the personal growth question, questions on short- and long-term academic and career goals, and the diversity question. For each one, I’ll give an example of a real MBA essay prompt from 2016 or 2017.
#1: Open-Ended
The open-ended MBA application essay question is just that: open. It allows you to tell your own story, giving you quite a bit of freedom but also little to no guidance. For that reason, many applicants find it to be the most challenging MBA essay prompt.
Harvard Business School has only one essay for its MBA application, and it’s the quintessential open-ended MBA essay question. This is the prompt for 2017-2018 applicants.
As we review your application, what more would you like us to know as we consider your candidacy for the Harvard Business School MBA program?
Note that, as in other open-ended MBA admission essay prompts, this question asks you to decide what you’ll write about. Successful Harvard applicants and HBS admissions counselors have advised applicants to use the prompt as a chance to demonstrate their past use of an especially desired trait, such as problem-solving skills. For example, many successful applicants use the prompt to describe a scenario in which they faced and overcame a challenge, especially as a leader or alongside a team.
Notably, Harvard also doesn’t list a word limit, so you can decide the appropriate length for your essay. However, most admissions counselors will advise you to keep it concise and straightforward.
#2: Leadership
Another common MBA essay prompt asks you to demonstrate your experience and skills as a leader. Leadership qualities are listed by nearly all MBA admissions counselors as fundamental to a career in business and, thus, to a successful business school application.
Let’s look at a sample leadership MBA essay prompt from Kellogg.
Leadership and teamwork are integral parts of the Kellogg experience. Describe a recent and meaningful time you were a leader. What challenges did you face, and what did you learn? (450 words)
In a response to this kind of prompt, you should be as specific as possible. Name the company you were working for or specifically describe the project you were heading. Who was on your team? What were your objectives? Did you meet them? How could you have done so more effectively?
While you shouldn’t be overly self-deprecating, don’t be afraid to address the challenges you met and how you overcame them (or would overcome them now, with more experience and knowledge). Remember that one important aspect of leadership is accountability, so if there were problems, don’t solely blame your team for them. Instead, reflect on how you successfully worked with your team to solve the problems, and/or on how you could have done so more effectively or efficiently.
#3: Personal Growth
The personal growth MBA admission essay prompt will ask you how you’ve changed in the past and how you want to grow in the future. Here’s one example from the Northwestern University Kellogg School of Management.
Pursuing an MBA is a catalyst for personal and professional growth. How have you grown in the past? How do you intend to grow at Kellogg? (450 words)
Don’t be afraid to get a bit personal with these kinds of prompts . They’re meant to gauge something about your personality and who you are, rather than only what you’ve done.
Many successful MBA admission essays that respond to these kinds of questions follow a past/present/future format. Ask yourself what traits you’ve gathered over the years that have benefited you personally and professionally, how you’ve improved, and what you’ve learned. What experiences have shaped you? Be as specific as possible.
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Then, take stock of yourself now: your career, your education, and where you see yourself in the future. What do you need in order to get there?
Finally, most essay MBA prompts in this vein (like Kellogg’s) will ask you how they can help you move towards that personal or professional goal. Be as specific as you can, focusing on the particular strengths of the prospective MBA program and how they match up with what you want to improve about yourself as a person, colleague, and leader.
#4: Your Plan
Some MBA application essay prompts will ask you about your career goals and how attendance at a particular business school will help you to achieve them. Let’s look at one from the USC Marshall School of Business.
Essay #1 (Required) – What is your specific, immediate short-term career goal upon completion of your MBA? Please include an intended position, function, and industry in your response. (word limit: 100)
As you can see, questions like these often request brief responses. So get straight to the point, and give details. Name a specific job you’d like to hold, what you’d like to do there, and even particular companies if you can.
Questions like this one will require some research. Research alumni from your prospective business school who’ve ended up in positions comparable to ones you’d like to hold in the future, particular companies and positions that match up with your personal and professional goals, and specific coursework or industry experiences offered by your prospective business school that would help you get there.
#5: Diversity, Culture, and Community
Finally, some MBA essay prompts will ask you how your unique background and experiences would contribute to the overall diversity and collegial atmosphere of a school’s campus climate and community. Here’s one example from USC.
Essay #2 (Required) – At Marshall, we take pride in the fact that our students work collaboratively, both inside and outside the classroom, to create a culture, a community, and an environment that truly defines what we call the Trojan Family. Please describe the contributions you expect to make to your classmates during your time at USC. How will they benefit from your presence in the program? (word limit: 500)
You can respond to questions like this, depending on the wording of the original prompt, by discussing your cultural background, identity, and/or personal experiences that have given you particular insight into a given community or that have lent you a unique perspective that could be valuable to your colleagues as you collaborate.
You can also discuss past community service projects or issues you’re passionate about and how you plan to carry those experiences and passions into your work at your prospective MBA program.
7 MBA Essay Tips
Writing MBA essays takes a particular skill set. Let’s go over the top seven MBA essay tips for making your application essay shine.
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#1: Write Early and Often
Even though MBA entrance essays are brief, they take a lot of polishing. Writing MBA essays takes time.
Don’t expect to write yours at the last minute or knock out a quality essay in a day. Most students need several drafts to make sure they’re getting their points across as elegantly and clearly as possible.
Start your essay well before the application deadline, when you don’t yet feel any pressure. For several weeks, don’t try to write at all. Instead, before crafting your essay for MBA admission, take notes on your past, present, and future. What have you learned? What unique experiences have you had? What have been the most meaningful projects you’ve undertaken? Ask friends, family, and mentors to tell you what they value most about you or what they see as your greatest personal and professional assets.
Only once you’ve gathered this material should you begin your first draft of your MBA application essay. Start with an outline for each one that includes the story you want to tell and the main points you want to get across.
Once you have a clear outline, you can start drafting. Taking the writing process seriously from start to finish will give you a much better product in the end than trying to write something hastily right before the deadline.
#2: Show, Don’t Tell
MBA admissions committees want to be able to tell that you have the qualities that are necessary to succeed in business school, such as leadership skills and integrity.
Your MBA admissions essay can be a great place to showcase those qualities. However, remember to show, not tell. Saying “I have strong leadership skills” doesn’t tell an admissions committee much. Through an anecdote about, say, meeting a difficult deadline or overcoming an obstacle, a reader should be able to tell that you have the qualities of a strong leader without your having to say so explicitly.
#3: Research Your Goals
When describing your future goals, be as specific as possible. Business schools know that your goals may change in the future, but stating specific goals now will show that you’ve done your research and have an idea of what you want and how an MBA program can help you get there.
Before writing your essay for MBA admission, research the ins and outs of the industry you want to enter, the position you’d like to have, companies you might like to work for, and coursework and internships or fieldwork that could aid you on your way to those goals.
#4: Keep It Concise
Never, ever go over a stated word count limit when you’re writing your essay for MBA admission. It might be tempting, but business schools want to see that you can get your point across concisely and straightforwardly.This rule goes for MBA essay prompts that don’t have specific word counts, too: sometimes, less is more.
One of the biggest mistakes applicants make in writing an essay for MBA admission is to use too much flowery language to come across as more professional. If you do this, it can be distracting and cause the admissions committee to miss the main points you’re making.
Bottom line, trim anything extraneous from your essay —that is, anything that doesn’t actively support the main point(s) you’re trying to get across.
#5: Show Self-Awareness
It might feel tempting to use the MBA admission essay as a space to list all of your accomplishments (and since your resume is already part of your application, this is unnecessary), but MBA admissions committees would rather see that you have insight into both your strengths and weaknesses. No one is perfect, and in your essay for MBA admission, you shouldn’t try to come across as if you’ve never made a mistake or faced a challenge that you’ve had to learn from.
Also, in business school and the business world at large, bouncing back from failures, being flexible, and problem solving are all essential skills. All of them require a thick skin and awareness of what you could do better.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t showcase your achievements, but if you’re asked about personal growth or an obstacle you’ve overcome, be clear about what you could have done more effectively in the past (at a job or in your education, for example) and the steps you’ve taken or will take to sidestep that mistake in the future.
#6: Share Your Personal Journey
Many applicants would prefer to focus only on their professional backgrounds and goals in their MBA essays, but you shouldn’t be afraid to get personal in your essay. You don’t need to tell your whole life story, but especially in response to questions that ask about your growth over time, you should showcase your personality and give the admissions committee an idea of your personal background and experiences.
#7: Ask for Edits
It might seem obvious, but many applicants don’t do it: proofread your work! When writing MBA essays, revision is key. Turning in an MBA essay with typos and other errors will come off as thoughtless and unprofessional.
You should also get a second (and, perhaps, a third and fourth) pair of eyes on your essay to make sure it’s coming across as you want it to. Going through several rounds of drafts is a necessary part of the writing process to ensure that you’re putting your best foot forward in your MBA entrance essay.
What’s Next?
Worried about how your GMAT score matches up to other applicants’? Find out more in our list of average GMAT scores by school.
Concerned about your chances of getting into an MBA program? Our guide to business school acceptance rates will help.
Ready to apply to business school? Check out our top eight tips for applying to MBA programs here.
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Author: Laura Dorwart
Laura Dorwart is a Ph.D. student at UC San Diego. She has taught and tutored hundreds of students in standardized testing, literature, and writing. View all posts by Laura Dorwart
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