how to read body language essay

• Bipolar Disorder
• Therapy Center
• When To See a Therapist
• Types of Therapy
• Best Online Therapy
• Best Couples Therapy
• Best Family Therapy
• Managing Stress
• Sleep and Dreaming
• Understanding Emotions
• Self-Improvement
• Healthy Relationships
• Student Resources
• Personality Types
• Guided Meditations
• Verywell Mind Insights
• 2024 Verywell Mind 25
• Mental Health in the Classroom
• Editorial Process
• Meet Our Review Board
• Crisis Support

Understanding Body Language and Facial Expressions

Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital.

Body language refers to the nonverbal signals that we use to communicate. These nonverbal signals make up a huge part of daily communication. In fact, body language may account for between 60% to 65% of all communication.

Examples of body language include facial expressions, eye gaze, gestures, posture, and body movements. In many cases, the things we  don't  say can convey volumes of information.

So, why is body language important? Body language can help us understand others and ourselves. It provides us with information about how people may be feeling in a given situation. We can also use body language to express emotions or intentions.

Facial expressions, gestures, and eye gaze are often identified as the three major types of body language, but other aspects such as posture and personal distance can also be used to convey information. Understanding body language is important, but it is also essential to pay attention to other cues such as context. In many cases, you should look at signals as a group rather than focus on a single action.

This article discusses the roles played by body language in communication, as well as body language examples and the meaning behind them—so you know what to look for when you're trying to interpret nonverbal actions.

Click Play to Learn How To Read Body Language

This video has been medically reviewed by David Susman, PhD .

Facial Expressions

Think for a moment about how much a person is able to convey with just a facial expression. A smile can indicate approval or happiness . A frown can signal disapproval or unhappiness.

In some cases, our facial expressions may reveal our true feelings about a particular situation. While you say that you are feeling fine, the look on your face may tell people otherwise.

Just a few examples of  emotions  that can be expressed via facial expressions include:

The expression on a person's face can even help determine if we trust or believe what the individual is saying.

There are many interesting findings about body language in psychology research. One study found that the most trustworthy facial expression involved a slight raise of the eyebrows and a slight smile. This expression, the researchers suggested, conveys both friendliness and confidence .

Facial expressions are also among the most universal forms of body language. The expressions used to convey fear, anger, sadness, and happiness are similar throughout the world.

Researcher Paul Ekman has found support for the universality of a variety of facial expressions tied to particular emotions including joy, anger, fear, surprise, and sadness.

Research even suggests that we make judgments about people's intelligence based upon their faces and expressions.

One study found that individuals who had narrower faces and more prominent noses were more likely to be perceived as intelligent. People with smiling, joyful expression were also judged as being more intelligent than those with angry expressions.

The eyes are frequently referred to as the "windows to the soul" since they are capable of revealing a great deal about what a person is feeling or thinking.

As you engage in conversation with another person, taking note of eye movements is a natural and important part of the communication process.

Some common things you may notice include whether people are making direct eye contact or averting their gaze, how much they are blinking, or if their pupils are dilated.

The best way to read someone's body language is to pay attention. Look out for any of the following eye signals.

When a person looks directly into your eyes while having a conversation, it indicates that they are interested and paying attention . However, prolonged eye contact can feel threatening.

On the other hand, breaking eye contact and frequently looking away might indicate that the person is distracted, uncomfortable, or trying to conceal his or her real feelings.

Blinking is natural, but you should also pay attention to whether a person is blinking too much or too little.

People often blink more rapidly when they are feeling distressed or uncomfortable. Infrequent blinking may indicate that a person is intentionally trying to control his or her eye movements.  

For example, a poker player might blink less frequently because he is purposely trying to appear unexcited about the hand he was dealt.

Pupil size can be a very subtle nonverbal communication signal. While light levels in the environment control pupil dilation, sometimes emotions can also cause small changes in pupil size.

For example, you may have heard the phrase "bedroom eyes" used to describe the look someone gives when they are attracted to another person. Highly dilated eyes, for example, can indicate that a person is interested or even aroused.   

Mouth expressions and movements can also be essential in reading body language. For example, chewing on the bottom lip may indicate that the individual is experiencing feelings of worry, fear, or insecurity.

Covering the mouth may be an effort to be polite if the person is yawning or coughing, but it may also be an attempt to cover up a frown of disapproval.

Smiling is perhaps one of the greatest body language signals, but smiles can also be interpreted in many ways.

A smile may be genuine, or it may be used to express false happiness, sarcasm, or even cynicism.

When evaluating body language, pay attention to the following mouth and lip signals:

• Pursed lips. Tightening the lips might be an indicator of distaste, disapproval, or distrust.
• Lip biting. People sometimes bite their lips when they are worried, anxious, or stressed.
• Covering the mouth. When people want to hide an emotional reaction, they might cover their mouths in order to avoid displaying smiles or smirks.
• Turned up or down. Slight changes in the mouth can also be subtle indicators of what a person is feeling. When the mouth is slightly turned up, it might mean that the person is feeling happy or optimistic . On the other hand, a slightly down-turned mouth can be an indicator of sadness, disapproval, or even an outright grimace.

Gestures can be some of the most direct and obvious body language signals. Waving, pointing, and using the fingers to indicate numerical amounts are all very common and easy to understand gestures.

Some gestures may be cultural , however, so giving a thumbs-up or a peace sign in another country might have a completely different meaning than it does in the United States.

The following examples are just a few common gestures and their possible meanings:

• A clenched fist  can indicate anger in some situations or solidarity in others.
• A thumbs up and thumbs down  are often used as gestures of approval and disapproval.  
• The "okay" gesture , made by touching together the thumb and index finger in a circle while extending the other three fingers can be used to mean "okay" or "all right."   In some parts of Europe, however, the same signal is used to imply you are nothing. In some South American countries, the symbol is actually a vulgar gesture.
• The V sign , created by lifting the index and middle finger and separating them to create a V-shape, means peace or victory in some countries. In the United Kingdom and Australia, the symbol takes on an offensive meaning when the back of the hand is facing outward.

The Arms and Legs

The arms and legs can also be useful in conveying nonverbal information. Crossing the arms can indicate defensiveness. Crossing legs away from another person may indicate dislike or discomfort with that individual.

Other subtle signals such as expanding the arms widely may be an attempt to seem larger or more commanding, while keeping the arms close to the body may be an effort to minimize oneself or withdraw from attention.

When you are evaluating body language, pay attention to some of the following signals that the arms and legs may convey:

• Crossed arms  might indicate that a person feels defensive, self-protective, or closed-off.
• Standing with hands placed on the hips  can be an indication that a person is ready and in control, or it can also possibly be a sign of aggressiveness .
• Clasping the hands behind the back  might indicate that a person is feeling bored, anxious, or even angry.
• Rapidly tapping fingers or fidgeting  can be a sign that a person is bored, impatient, or frustrated.
• Crossed legs  can indicate that a person is feeling closed-off or in need of privacy. 

How we hold our bodies can also serve as an important part of body language.

The term posture refers to how we hold our bodies as well as the overall physical form of an individual.

Posture can convey a wealth of information about how a person is feeling as well as hints about personality characteristics, such as whether a person is confident, open, or submissive.

Sitting up straight, for example, may indicate that a person is focused and paying attention to what's going on. Sitting with the body hunched forward, on the other hand, can imply that the person is bored or indifferent.

When you are trying to read body language, try to notice some of the signals that a person's posture can send.

• Open posture  involves keeping the trunk of the body open and exposed. This type of posture indicates friendliness, openness, and willingness.
• Closed posture  involves hiding the trunk of the body often by hunching forward and keeping the arms and legs crossed. This type of posture can be an indicator of hostility, unfriendliness, and anxiety .

Personal Space

Have you ever heard someone refer to their need for personal space? Have you ever started to feel uncomfortable when someone stands just a little too close to you?

The term proxemics , coined by anthropologist Edward T. Hall, refers to the distance between people as they interact. Just as body movements and facial expressions can communicate a great deal of nonverbal information, so can the physical space between individuals.

Hall  described four levels  of social distance that occur in different situations.

Intimate Distance: 6 to 18 inches 

This level of physical distance often indicates a closer relationship or greater comfort between individuals. It usually occurs during intimate contact such as hugging, whispering, or touching.

Personal Distance: 1.5 to 4 feet

Physical distance at this level usually occurs between people who are family members or close friends. The closer the people can comfortably stand while interacting can be an indicator of the level of intimacy in their relationship.

Social Distance: 4 to 12 feet.

This level of physical distance is often used with individuals who are acquaintances.

With someone you know fairly well, such as a co-worker you see several times a week, you might feel more comfortable interacting at a closer distance.

In cases where you do not know the other person well, such as a postal delivery driver you only see once a month, a distance of 10 to 12 feet may feel more comfortable.

Public Distance: 12 to 25 feet

Physical distance at this level is often used in public speaking situations. Talking in front of a class full of students or giving a presentation at work are good examples of such situations.

It is also important to note that the level of personal distance that individuals need to feel comfortable can vary from culture to culture.

One oft-cited example is the difference between people from Latin cultures and those from North America. People from Latin countries tend to feel more comfortable standing closer to one another as they interact, while those from North America need more personal distance.

Roles of Nonverbal Communication

Body language plays many roles in social interactions. It can help facilitate the following:

• Earning trust : Engaging in eye contact, nodding your head while listening, and even unconsciously mirroring another person's body language are all signals that you and someone else are bonding.
• Emphasizing a point : The tone of voice you use and the way you engage listeners with your hand and arm gestures, or by how you take up space, are all ways that affect how your message comes across.
• Revealing truths : When someone's body language doesn't match what they're saying, we might intuitively pick up on the fact that they are withholding information, or perhaps not being honest about how they feel.
• Tuning in to your own needs : Our own body language can reveal a lot about how we're feeling. For instance, are you in a slumped posture, clenching your jaw and/or pursing your lips? This may be a signal that the environment you're currently in is triggering you in some way. Your body might be telling you that you're feeling unsafe, stressed, or any number of emotions.

Remember, though, that your assumptions about what someone else's body language means may not always be accurate.

What does body language tell you about a person?

Body language can tell you when someone feels anxious, angry, excited, or any emotion. It may also suggest personality traits (i.e., whether someone is shy or outgoing). But, body language can be misleading. It is subject to a person's mood, energy level, and circumstances.

While in some cases, a lack of eye contact indicates untrustworthiness, for instance, it doesn't mean you automatically can't trust someone who isn't looking at you in the eyes. It could be they are distracted and thinking about something else. Or, again, it could be a cultural difference at play.

How to Improve Your Nonverbal Communication

The first step in improving your nonverbal communication is to pay attention. Try to see if you can pick up on other people's physical cues as well as your own.

Maybe when someone is telling you a story, you tend to look at the floor. In order to show them you're paying attention, you might try making eye contact instead, and even showing a slight smile, to show you're open and engaged.

What is good body language?

Good body language, also known as positive body language, should convey interest and enthusiasm. Some ways to do this include maintaining an upright and open posture, keeping good eye contact, smiling, and nodding while listening.

Using body language with intention is all about finding balance. For instance, when shaking someone's hand before a job interview, holding it somewhat firmly can signal professionalism. But, gripping it too aggressively might cause the other person pain or discomfort. Be sure to consider how other people might feel.

In addition, continue to develop emotional intelligence . The more in touch you are with how you feel, the easier it often is to sense how others are receiving you. You'll be able to tell when someone is open and receptive, or, on the other hand, if they are closed-off and need some space.

If we want to feel a certain way, we can use our body language to our advantage. For example, research found that people who maintained an upright seated posture while dealing with stress had higher levels of self-esteem and more positive moods compared to people who had slumped posture.

Of course, it's verbal and nonverbal communication—as well as the context of a situation—that often paints a full picture.

There isn't always a one-size-fits-all solution for what nonverbal cues are appropriate. However, by staying present and being respectful, you'll be well on your way to understanding how to use body language effectively.

A Word From Verywell

Understanding body language can go a long way toward helping you better communicate with others and interpreting what others might be trying to convey. While it may be tempting to pick apart signals one by one, it's important to look at these nonverbal signals in relation to verbal communication, other nonverbal signals, and the situation.

You can also learn more about how to improve your nonverbal communication to become better at letting people know what you are feeling—without even saying a word.

Foley GN, Gentile JP. Nonverbal communication in psychotherapy . Psychiatry (Edgmont) . 2010;7(6):38-44.

Tipper CM, Signorini G, Grafton ST. Body language in the brain: constructing meaning from expressive movement . Front Hum Neurosci . 2015;9:450. doi:10.3389/fnhum.2015.00450

Todorov A, Baron SG, Oosterhof NN. Evaluating face trustworthiness: a model based approach. Soc Cogn Affect Neurosci. 2008;3(2):119-27. doi:10.1093/scan/nsn009

Ekman P. Darwin's contributions to our understanding of emotional expressions. Philos Trans R Soc Lond, B, Biol Sci. 2009;364(1535):3449-51. doi:10.1098/rstb.2009.0189

Kleisner K, Chvátalová V, Flegr J. Perceived intelligence is associated with measured intelligence in men but not women. PLoS ONE. 2014;9(3):e81237. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0081237

D'agostino TA, Bylund CL. Nonverbal accommodation in health care communication. Health Commun . 2014;29(6):563-73. doi:10.1080/10410236.2013.783773

Marchak FM. Detecting false intent using eye blink measures. Front Psychol. 2013;4:736. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2013.00736

Jiang J, Borowiak K, Tudge L, Otto C, Von kriegstein K. Neural mechanisms of eye contact when listening to another person talking. Soc Cogn Affect Neurosci. 2017;12(2):319-328. doi:10.1093/scan/nsw127

Roter DL, Frankel RM, Hall JA, Sluyter D. The expression of emotion through nonverbal behavior in medical visits. Mechanisms and outcomes . J Gen Intern Med. 2006;21 Suppl 1:S28-34. doi:10.1111/j.1525-1497.2006.00306.x

Montgomery KJ, Isenberg N, Haxby JV. Communicative hand gestures and object-directed hand movements activated the mirror neuron system. Soc Cogn Affect Neurosci. 2007;2(2):114-22. doi:10.1093/scan/nsm004

Vacharkulksemsuk T, Reit E, Khambatta P, Eastwick PW, Finkel EJ, Carney DR. Dominant, open nonverbal displays are attractive at zero-acquaintance . Proc Natl Acad Sci USA. 2016;113(15):4009-14. doi:10.1073/pnas.1508932113

Hall ET. A system for the notation of proxemic behavior . American Anthropologist. October 1963;65(5):1003-1026. doi:10.1525/aa.1963.65.5.02a00020.

Hughes H, Hockey J, Berry G. Power play: the use of space to control and signify power in the workplace . Culture and Organization. 2019;26(4):298-314. doi:10.1080/14759551.2019.1601722

Chemelo VDS, Né YGS, Frazão DR, et al. Is there association between stress and bruxism? A systematic review and meta-analysis.  Front Neurol . 2020;11:590779. doi:10.3389/fneur.2020.590779

Jarick M, Bencic R.  Eye contact is a two-way street: arousal is elicited by the sending and receiving of eye gaze information.   Front Psychol . 2019;10:1262. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01262

Fred HL. Banning the handshake from healthcare settings is not the solution to poor hand hygiene .  Tex Heart Inst J . 2015;42(6):510-511. doi:10.14503/THIJ-15-5254

Nair S, Sagar M, Sollers J 3rd, Consedine N, Broadbent E. Do slumped and upright postures affect stress responses? A randomized trial .  Health Psychol . 2015;34(6):632-641. doi:10.1037/hea0000146

Hehman, E, Flake, JK and Freeman, JB. Static and dynamic facial cues differentially affect the consistency of social evaluations .  Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin . 2015; 41(8): 1123-34. doi:10.1177/0146167215591495.

Pillai D, Sheppard E, Mitchell P. Can people guess what happened to others from their reactions? Gilbert S, ed. PLoS ONE . 2012;7(11):e49859. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0049859.

• Ekman P. Emotions Revealed: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve Communication and Emotional Life. 2nd ed. New York: Holt; 2007.
• Pease A, Pease B. The Definitive Book of Body Language. Orion Publishing Group; 2017.

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

Reading and Understanding Body Language Report (Assessment)

• To find inspiration for your paper and overcome writer’s block
• As a source of information (ensure proper referencing)
• As a template for you assignment

Introduction

Body language.

Body language refers to the non-verbal and often unintentional communication manifested by an individual through gestures, stances and facial expressions. Since this form of communication accounts for between 60 to 75 percent of the meaning in a message (Hogan, K., 2010), it is very important to learn how to read the body language.

Our study of reading the body language begins from the amount of space between us and the person we are addressing. The closer someone is to us, the more comfortable they are. If you try to move slightly closer to the person and he moves slightly further back, this implies that the person does not want the relationship to be closer than it already is (Businessballs para. 4) However, if the person doesn’t move further away, then they are receptive but if they even move closer then they perhaps like us. The amount of space between two people can be used to deduce the nature of their relationship though this may vary from one culture to another.

Head position

A study of the position of the head also reveals much; a tilted head is a sign of sympathy but if the head tilting is accompanied by a smile, then this is an indication of the person being mischievous or flirting. A lowered head indicates that the person is not being honest, shy or embarrassed. Nodding shows agreement while slow nodding shows attentiveness. Head shaking shows disagreement and slow head shaking is a sign of a strong disagreement.

The head tends to affect the general movements of the body, it is also delicate being where the brain is. It is therefore used in many directional movements for both body language and protective mechanisms.

Eye movements

Eye movements such as blinking, eye direction or winking conveys a lot of information. Looking sideways is a sign of dishonesty or distraction while looking down exposes someone to be shy. Direct and persistent eye contact can reveal a faked honesty while widening the eyes shows someone’s interest. Winking is a friendly acknowledgement or cheeky behavior and blinking frequently can mean that one is lying (Psychologist World p. 2). Details of the eye can be observed from 40 meters or more and this makes it an accurate communication tool if the people are 40 or 50 meters away from each other.

Arm Position

The position of the arms also give information about an individual. Crossed arms give the impression of a possibly defensive position. When the legs are also crossed, the person is probably defensive but when he clenches his fists too, then this is a definite defensive position. Crossed arms with parted feet signify authority but if the hands are rested on the hips then the person is growing impatient. Arms are quite an accurate communicator of mood and emotion especially when used in combination with other body languages.

Position of Feet or Legs

Legs and feet can give more accurate information than other body parts. Look at the individual’s feet, if he is tapping them, shifting weight or walking in circles then he is impatient or scared. A knee buckle with the arms rested on the knees is a sign of exhaustion. When an individual crosses his feet at the ankles while sitting, then he is relaxed and when the legs are together (standing at attention), this as a sign of respect. Movements of the legs and feet are quite difficult to control than other parts like the head and can give more accurate messages about the individual’s mood.

The type of handshake can also give information about someone, especially his emotions; a firm handshake shows that the person is confident but placing hands in the pocket shows nervousness, lack of confidence or boredom (Lee para. 5). A firm handshake should however not be mistaken as a sign of physical strength, neither does it have a meaning of a positive mood or persona. When the handshake is done using both hands, then the person is trying to win your trust or showing his honesty. This type of handshake could also mean that the person is trying to extend his control over you. Sweaty palms could be a sign of dishonesty, this type of body language is also prone to misinterpretation since a medical condition known as Hyperhidrosis also causes sweating of the palms and feet (Businessballs para. 12). Finger play is commonly practiced by children and is a sign that the child is telling a lie or is being dishonest in some way.

Our body language study now focuses on the voice; the tone, pitch or volume of the voice all give meaning about you. Yelling shows that an individual has lost control of a situation while a lack of tonal variation is a sign of boredom (LessonPlans para. 6). Boredom is also exhibited by use of one-sentence answers while an energetic voice tone shows that the person is confident. The voice is prone to misunderstanding and must be carefully used, some people are used to speaking in a loud voice and this may be misinterpreted to mean rudeness.

While body language can be used to gather more information than verbal communication, misinterpretations can easily occur especially if the people are not from the same culture. Different gestures or facial expressions have different meanings in different societies; therefore, analysis of a body language becomes more accurate when used in combination with other forms of communication.

Certain bodily signals are known to be due to medical conditions, examples include Hyperhidrosis, which causes sweating of palms, and Astigmatism, which causes defects in the eye and may be mistaken to mean that one is avoiding eye contact. Cultures also have different interpretations for the different body languages; avoiding eye is a sign of respect in some Black Caribbean cultures but is a sign of dishonesty in the Western cultures.

• Businessballs. Body Language: how to read body language signs and gestures – non- verbal communications – male and female, for work, social, dating , and mating relationships . 2010. Web.
• Hogan, K. Secrets of How to Read Body Language . 2010. Web.
• Lee, M. Reading Body Language. 2010.
• Lesson Plans Inc. Tone of Voice and Nonverbal Body Language. 2010. Web.
• Psychologist World. Reading the Eyes . 2010. Web.
• Types of Conflicts and Ways to Resolve Them
• The Art of Listening: Communication Skill
• The Norwegian Business Etiquette
• Nonverbal Behavior of Japanese
• Sociology and Theory of Conflict
• Analyzing Messages in Communications: E-Mail Examples
• Facilitation Technique: A Framework for Efficient Communication
• How Communication Systems Work?
• Negotiation: Concept and Effectiveness
• Deliberative Dialogues: Community Communication
• Chicago (A-D)
• Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2021, December 25). Reading and Understanding Body Language. https://ivypanda.com/essays/reading-body-language/

"Reading and Understanding Body Language." IvyPanda , 25 Dec. 2021, ivypanda.com/essays/reading-body-language/.

IvyPanda . (2021) 'Reading and Understanding Body Language'. 25 December.

IvyPanda . 2021. "Reading and Understanding Body Language." December 25, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/reading-body-language/.

1. IvyPanda . "Reading and Understanding Body Language." December 25, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/reading-body-language/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Reading and Understanding Body Language." December 25, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/reading-body-language/.

How To Read Body Language & Nonverbal Cues (The Correct Way)

Article Created:

Article Last Updated:

Understanding body language is key to understanding people and can give us hints about the person we are talking with. Crying, restless feet and a clenched jaw can all signify unhappiness and show that you’re not agreeing with what’s being said and that’s just the start of learning non-verbal cues.

You already know how to read people’s body language, but when you start narrowing it down and noticing these nonverbal cues, you start seeing them a lot more clearly. You almost have an eye for reading people’s intentions before they act on them. It’s like you have an invisible superpower at your fingertips.

You need to be observant of your environment and the context of the conversation in order to be able to read body language. You should take note of the way someone moves, their facial expressions, and any other gestures they make. This is called a baseline in the body language community. Once you identify these nonverbal cues, it is easier for you to understand what the person may be feeling or thinking about at that moment.

I used to judge people based on their looks alone, but now I realize that body language is often a better indication of someone’s personality. By learning about it, I’ve become a much better communicator and express my feelings nonverbally and verbally in a more articulate manner. It’s my ace up the sleeve when dealing with difficult people or making people feel better about themselves.

Next, we will go over how to READ CONTEXT in order to learn about body language. After that, I’ll introduce my top 8 TIPS for reading people.

Quick Video On How To Read Body Language.

Understand context first. (learning how to read), the reason we baseline first., what do we do once we notice a cluster shift, do the words match the body language cues, 8 area of the body to read first., look at the direction of their feet., forehead first. (furrowed brow), see if they’re making direct eye contact., observe their posture., pay attention to their hands and arms., notice their breathing., check out their smile (facial expressions & fake smile), see if they’re mirroring your own body language (think crossed legs), now, what do you do (learning how to read), what is body language, can body language be misleading, what is nonverbal communication, why is understanding body language important, how do you use your body language.

• How to read body language with pictures
• Who can read body language

How Do You Read Body Language In An Interview?

• How To Read Body Language When Someone Is Lying.

How Do You Read Body Language When Someone Likes You?

What does your body language say about you, final thoughts..

When you first approach or observe a person or group of people it’s important to consider their context. For example, are they in a social, business or formal setting?

When observing people in informal settings, you might notice they’re less guarded and more “natural”. For example, you might see someone playing with their hair or sitting with their legs apart and arms at rest – they are feeling relaxed in their surroundings. “It’s more common to see this behavior in informal settings.”

When it comes to context, we need to remember where a person is (environment), who they are talking to (one on one or in a group), and the conversation’s topic (what they are talking about). This will give us factual data that we can use when analyzing somebody’s body language and nonverbal cues.

Now that we understand what context is, we need to understand what a baseline is and how we can use it to start to a person’s body language.

What Is A Baseline In Body Language?

The baseline of a person is the set of behaviors, thoughts, and feelings that are typical for them. It is how they act in everyday life and in different environments.

For example, someone who is feeling depressed might move around lifelessly with their head down. Another example of a baseline is when someone is in a social setting and feels more relaxed and happy they will use open gestures, smile more and make good eye contact.

Different people have different reactions under different conditions. So to get a true baseline, you need to see them in relaxed and heated situations, as well as in normal conditions; this way, we can also pick out inconsistencies.

This is easier said than done, so we need to work with what we have and gather information and data points by analyzing the situation we find ourselves in or the person we are trying to read.

The reason we need to get a baseline is to catch sudden changes and questions within the person’s body language. Any shift or unnatural change should be an area of interest.

It’s worth noting here detecting deception is difficult. It can be hard to know if a person is lying by looking at them, and the person may not even tell the lie with words. However, it has been found that small changes in body language can indicate signs of deceit, such as sudden movements or gestures.

By establishing a baseline and noticing any sudden changes in an individual’s body language, it will be possible to catch or probe a little further into a person’s thought process.

This is why we baseline someone. To see what changes they’re going through so we can spot issues they might not be telling us about or problems as they arise. Body language is hard to read, but it will get easier the more you work on it.

Next, we’ll take a look at clusters of information shifts. This will give us clues as to what’s going on internally with a person.

Noticing Cluster Cue’s (Non-Verble Shifts)

A cluster or cluster shift is when we see someone become uncomfortable. You can tell when this happens because they’ll have a few different body language movements.

We are looking for a shift from the baseline, but not just one or two differences. There needs to be a group of four or five cues to raise our interest.

Example of clusters: Arms down to the side being moved across our chest a shift in breathing from the stomach to the chest. An increase in blink rate from slow to rapid, moving sitting up in a chair or moving around, eyebrows narrowing, and pupil dilation.

A cluster shift is defined as a group of clusters taking place within five minutes.

When we notice a cluster shift, this is the time to think back on what has been said or done to the person for them to react in that way. For example, if you’re a car salesperson trying to sell a car and mention the cost of ownership, and your client sits up straight or crosses their arms, this can be interpreted as them feeling uncomfortable about that particular point. Maybe they don’t have the money, maybe they’re just coming to look at a potential car—whatever the reason, it’s your job to figure this out or avoid it altogether.

When you spot a shift or cluster group, something is happening. That’s when we need to take account of the data point and adjust accordingly. Since I picked up this skill, I’ve become a better observer and that has helped me to become better at conversations. It’s kind of like a secret superpower.

Next up, we need to look at the words and nonverbal cues people use all at once and determine if there is any continuity between them. This will tell us if something is quite right!

superpower.

When we analyze body non-verbals we also have to listen to the voice. Does the message match the cues?

Body language should also match the sentiment of what is being discussed. For example, if someone mentions money or a pay increase, they may rub their hands together because the person would be happy about it. Or when a person uses an illustrator (taps a table or points out something with their hand) the hand will move as we talk to highlight the points we are making.

If they are out of sync with the message, this would be a data point that interests us one that is worth noting depending on the context of the situation.

A more accurate way to determine if someone is telling the truth or not is by checking their body language. A person may answer “yes” verbally but physically shake their head. It’s important to notice when people don’t match up because this can send a wrong message.

Now that you understand how to read body language a little bit, let’s take a look at my top 8 areas to note when you’re looking for someone for the first time.

• Forehead First.
• See if they’re making eye contact.
• Check out their smile.
• See if they’re mirroring your own body language.

In the fabulous book What Every Body Is Saying , Joe Navarro suggests we start to analyze from the ground up. The feet will indicate where a person wants to go, as well as comfort and discomfort.

When I first analyze a person, I always look at their feet. This gives me two pieces of information: where they want to go and who they’re most interested in. I do this by looking at a person’s feet.

For example, if they are pointing towards the door, then they want to go that way, but if they are in a group of people and their feet are pointing towards someone, then that is the person they find most interesting. I recommend taking a look at Body Language Of The Feet (One Step At A Time) for a more in-depth understanding.

The feet are also a reflection of what the person is feeling on the inside. When we are feeling restless or uncomfortable, our feet will often be bouncing around or wrapping around a chair leg to lock. If someone has their feet up on the seat of a chair, it may be because they feel superior to others and need to put themselves in an elevated position.

When in doubt, trust your gut. Emotions often appear as microexpressions in fractions of seconds, so if we feel a certain way, it’s probably for good reason.

Most people look ahead first, then they look at their forehead. The forehead is one of the most visible areas of the body and one that is visible almost all the time. You can tell a lot about a person from their forehead just by looking at it. For example, if you see a furrowed brow , it could mean they are angry or confused. This is context-dependent. I always take a quick look at the forehead in the first few second of analsising a person. Check out What Does It Mean When Someone Looks At Your Forehead for more information on the forehead.

Once you have a general idea of how a person feels, take a look at their eye contact. Are they looking away, or keeping good eye contact? This should give you some idea of how comfortable they feel around people. Also pay attention to their blink rate; a faster blink rate tends to mean more stress and p Check out Body Language Of The Eyes (Learn All You Need To Know) for more information about the eyes.

The second place I look is at their posture. How are they standing or sitting? What kind of vibe am I getting from them? Are they happy, comfortable, or sad and depressed? You want to get a general impression of how they look to get an idea of what is going on internally with them.

Hands and body signals are a great place to glean information. One of the first things we notice about people is their hands, which can tell you a lot about them. For instance, someone who bites their nails could be anxious; if dirt under the nails suggests they work in a garage or some kind of manual labour.

The hands are also used to express oneself and hide from things one doesn’t like. They’re also used as adapters and pacifiers to calm ourselves down. For a better understanding of the hands check out What Does Body Language Of The Hands Mean.

There are two places a person tends to breathe from depending on how he or she is feeling. A person who is relaxed will tend to breathe from the stomach area, while a person who is nervous or excited will breathe from his or her chest area. This can give you some good data points to work with in order to tell you how a person is feeling. For a more detailed understanding of what to look in for in breathing check out this article on mentalizer.com

You might think that a person who smiles at you likes you, but that isn’t always the case. There are true and false smiles that can mean many different things, for example, I saw a manager flash a smile to someone who worked for him. The smile was only a brief moment before it dropped from his face in an instant. A true smile will fade from the face naturally over a few seconds these are called Duchenne smile for more about smiles check out When You’re Happy, Your Body Language Is Happy Too.

Mirroring someone else’s body language, in some cases, is indicative of rapport with that person or trying to build it. People will mimic the postures and gestures of others in order to build rapport. For example, if you see someone sit back in a chair and then someone else does this a few seconds later, you know they have synced with each other and built a kind of rapport. Another example would be when one person crosses their legs, and then someone else does this a few seconds later. They’ve also synced.

You need to know the reason behind reading body language in the first place. The reason could be to figure someone out or to analyze a true crime program, for example. Once you understand why you’re trying to read body language, it becomes easier. We can use the new knowledge we have obtained to communicate with a person on their level or in a more formal setting to gain the upper hand in a sales or business setting. Whatever the reason may be, that’s up to you to decide. Next, we’ll take a look at a few common questions.

Frequently Asked Questions.

Body language is a form of nonverbal communication in which physical behaviors, such as facial expressions, body posture, and hand gestures, are used to convey messages. These nonverbal cues can be used to understand another person’s emotional state and to communicate one’s own emotions. There are different types of body language cues that can be used to communicate different things, such as happiness, sadness, anger, or fear. It is important to be able to understand and interpret body language in order to effectively communicate with others.

Body language, facial expressions, gestures, and body movements can all be misleading. For example, someone may cross their arms while telling a lie, which could be interpreted as a sign of disinterest or nonverbal communication. But no single body language gesture can tell you anything. You have to observe clusters to get an idea of what’s happening and it’s only an idea.

Nonverbal communication is the process of sending and receiving messages without using words. It can include body language, facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, and posture. Nonverbal cues are important in helping us to understand a message.

Understanding body language is important because it can help you to better understand what someone is saying, even if they are not using words. This is because body language cues can give you clues about how a person is feeling or what they are thinking. For example, if someone has their arms crossed, shifted in their seat, crossed their legs and looking at you with the intent they may be feeling defensive or uncomfortable

You can use body language to read what someone is expressing without them even knowing it. You can also use body language to gain trust, win people over and build rapport.

How to read body language with pictures?

In order to read body language with pictures, you will need to first understand the basics of body language. This includes understanding the different parts of the body and how they can be used to communicate. Once you have a basic understanding of body language, you will be able to better interpret the meaning of body language in pictures.

Who can read body language?

People from all walks of life can read body language to some degree, but those who have studied it extensively (such as psychologists and police officers) are able to glean much more information from it.

One of the most common mistakes that interviewees make is not paying attention to body language, which may be their downfall.

Some of the most common body language cues include:

• Facial expression- optimism, anger, or surprise.
• Gestures- waving hands to emphasize a point or showing palms in an effort for openness and honesty.
• Posture- slouched over or upright posture taking up space.
• Speech patterns- fast-talking or slow talking.

The way a person behaves in an interview can tell a lot about them. Most importantly, how they respond to the questions that are asked will show their interest and whether or not they would be a good fit for the position.

Having said that, we could confuse nervous body language with negative body language. We need to take the candidate’s stress into account before we analyze them.

Some signs that could show if someone is interested in the job include eye contact, leaning forward when talking, taking notes, asking questions at the end of the interview.

Signs that might indicate that someone is not interested to include: looking around the room, crossing arms across the chest, looking bored or uninterested.

How To Read Body Language When Someone Is Lying?

Most people believe that they can spot a liar by their body language. This is not exactly true.

People who are lying might display some specific behaviors such as looking away, playing with their hair, scratching themselves, etc. However, the problem is that these behaviors might also happen when someone is uncomfortable or feels guilty about something. In addition to this, some people are just really good liars and their body language reveals nothing about whether they are telling the truth or not.

It is worth checking out Spy A Lie how to detect deception and also Telling Lies by Paul Ekman for a more in-depth look into lying and body language tells.

You can generally tell when a person likes you by observing their body language. We can see if they are trying to get closer to us, talk more, or make eye contact.

A person who likes you will try to get closer to you and be more engaged in the conversation. They will also try to make eye contact with you and touch your arm or back in order to show interest in what you’re saying.

To learn more about if someone likes you check out how to tell if he secretly loves you for more tips and tricks.

The most important thing to keep in mind when trying to read body language is that it isn’t just about what someone does with their hands. Body language also communicates information through facial expressions, posture, the way they sit or stand, and even how they dress.

It is important that you are aware of your own body language as well. Your posture, facial expressions, and other movements can have an impact on how others perceive you.

Are you displaying any negative body language or are you more open and honest? It’s worth checking out this YouTube video of Mark Bowden talking about how to use non-verbal communication.

How to read body language is a natural form of nonverbal communication between humans. It is instinctive and not that hard to pick up on. The difficult part is determining when to pick up on cluster and tells, which can be done through experience, learning the basics of body language, and understanding the context.

It’s natural and instinctive to pay attention to body language. What’s not natural, however, is understanding when someone is expressing emotion and when they are trying to hide it. Hopefully, these techniques will help you to read between the lines more easily.

Thank you for reading. I hope you found this post helpful!

Body Language Matters

How it works

Transform your enterprise with the scalable mindsets, skills, & behavior change that drive performance.

Explore how BetterUp connects to your core business systems.

We pair AI with the latest in human-centered coaching to drive powerful, lasting learning and behavior change.

Build leaders that accelerate team performance and engagement.

Unlock performance potential at scale with AI-powered curated growth journeys.

Build resilience, well-being and agility to drive performance across your entire enterprise.

Transform your business, starting with your sales leaders.

Unlock business impact from the top with executive coaching.

Foster a culture of inclusion and belonging.

Accelerate the performance and potential of your agencies and employees.

See how innovative organizations use BetterUp to build a thriving workforce.

Discover how BetterUp measurably impacts key business outcomes for organizations like yours.

A demo is the first step to transforming your business. Meet with us to develop a plan for attaining your goals.

• What is coaching?

Learn how 1:1 coaching works, who its for, and if it's right for you.

Accelerate your personal and professional growth with the expert guidance of a BetterUp Coach.

Types of Coaching

Navigate career transitions, accelerate your professional growth, and achieve your career goals with expert coaching.

Enhance your communication skills for better personal and professional relationships, with tailored coaching that focuses on your needs.

Find balance, resilience, and well-being in all areas of your life with holistic coaching designed to empower you.

Discover your perfect match : Take our 5-minute assessment and let us pair you with one of our top Coaches tailored just for you.

Research, expert insights, and resources to develop courageous leaders within your organization.

Best practices, research, and tools to fuel individual and business growth.

View on-demand BetterUp events and learn about upcoming live discussions.

The latest insights and ideas for building a high-performing workplace.

• BetterUp Briefing

The online magazine that helps you understand tomorrow's workforce trends, today.

Innovative research featured in peer-reviewed journals, press, and more.

Founded in 2022 to deepen the understanding of the intersection of well-being, purpose, and performance

We're on a mission to help everyone live with clarity, purpose, and passion.

Join us and create impactful change.

Read the buzz about BetterUp.

Meet the leadership that's passionate about empowering your workforce.

For Business

For Individuals

How to read body language and gain deeper emotional awareness

Jump to section

What is body language?

Why is understanding body language important, how to read body language according to every body part, 5 ways to read positive body language, 5 ways to read negative body language, upskill yourself by learning how to read body language.

Although we can communicate with our words and tone of voice, there’s another language we all speak. 

And that’s body language.

The way we present ourselves   to others via   nonverbal communication cues   can speak louder than words. A person’s gestures, facial expressions, and amount of eye contact all tell a story.

Learning how to interpret and understand body language helps you better understand your peers. Being aware of your own body language is also important so that you can present yourself in the way you’d like.

Understanding body language psychology isn’t always simple. But we’re going to help demystify the secrets behind body language signs.

Here’s how to read body language and the meaning behind different types of nonverbal communication.

If you've gauged a friend or stranger’s mood just by looking at their face or gestures they made, you successfully read their body language. 

The body language definition refers to nonverbal cues we consciously and unconsciously use to communicate. It includes all non-verbal communication.

The words we use when speaking make up our verbal communication.

The non-verbal cues that make up a person's body language often communicate more than the words they use. These cues can include:

• Facial expressions
• Hand gestures
• Physical behavior
• Tone of voice

We’ll look at cues in more detail as we delve deeper into how to read body language below. 

One of the most important facts about body language signs is that we often use nonverbal signals instinctively or unconsciously. 

For this reason, body language can often tell others more about what we think or feel than the words we use.

Depending on the body language you use, you can encourage the person you’re communicating with   to trust you   and be relaxed in your presence. Or you can confuse or offend them. 

The types of nonverbal communication you use can even undermine or contradict what you say.

So, why is body language important, and what are the benefits of learning how to understand it?

The answers to these questions become clearer when   we look at the 7-38-55 rule . This rule is based on the findings of psychology professor Albert Mehrabian. The University of California professor developed the rule in the late ‘60s and early ‘70s. 

According to Mehrabian, the spoken word communicates 7% of meaning. Your tone of voice communicates 38% of meaning, and your body language communicates 55% of meaning.

Given how much we communicate via body language cues, learning how to understand them is essential if you’re serious about   being a good communicator . When you know how to read body language, you can gain   deeper insight   into what others are really saying. 

You can also consciously improve your nonverbal communication.

Let’s explore the benefits of understanding body language:

1. Develop your emotional awareness

Being able to read body language signs allows you to better   interpret the emotions and moods of other people . This enables you to understand what they really think or feel about something. 

You can then respond to them in the appropriate way.

2. Bond better with your peers

Not everyone is comfortable   sharing their true feelings or thoughts . They might be going through family difficulties at home. Or they might feel that no one would   listen to them   anyway. 

By interpreting people's body language, you can better understand their views. Or you can be friendly and supportive   when they need support   but don’t feel that they can ask for it.

3. Build trust easier

When you know how to read body language, you know   how to use it to build trust . 

You can consciously use nonverbal cues that indicate you’re being open and honest. You can also avoid the cues that imply you're distracted,   dishonest, or hiding something .

4. Get your point across in the right way

Another benefit of understanding body language is that you can use it to better get your point across. You can consciously incorporate gestures and other nonverbal cues that emphasize your point rather than contradict it.

5. Make a good impression and influence people

Consciously using different types of nonverbal communication can help you   appear confident , even if you don’t feel it. You can also emphasize your message and inspire trust, as mentioned. Altogether, this helps you make a good first impression and   builds your influence   on others. 

Learning how to read body language signals isn’t limited to one or two parts of the body. 

Familiarize yourself with these parts of the body that offer important insights into a person and their message.

The eyes are known as the windows of the soul. They play an important role in face-to-face communication. Take note of body language signs such as:

• Eye contact:   a direct gaze indicates interest unless it’s prolonged, in which case it can be threatening. Looking away frequently or avoiding eye contact can indicate that the person is uncomfortable, trying to hide something, or distracted.
• Pupil dilation:   highly dilated pupils can indicate excitement, attraction, or desire. Constricted, smaller pupils could indicate anger or a negative mood.
• Blinking:   frequent blinking can indicate that the person feels uncomfortable or upset.

2. Facial expressions

Often unconscious, our facial expressions can reveal what we really think about something. 

There is   no global standard for facial expressions   linked to specific emotions. The meaning behind facial expressions depends on context. However, expressions can indicate a range of emotions. 

Among them are:

A person’s arms can also be used for non-verbal communication. Body language examples of this include:

• Keeping the arms close to the body to draw less attention
• Expanding the arms to   appear more commanding , larger, or threatening
• Crossing the arms to indicate feelings of self-protection, defensiveness, or being closed-off

4. Feet and legs

Our feet and legs aren’t the first body parts that come to mind when we think about types of nonverbal communication. 

However, they also play a role in body language psychology:

• Both feet pointed toward you or in a V-shape toward you can indicate interest.
• Both feet pointed away from you, especially in an angled V-shape, can indicate disinterest.
• Crossed legs may indicate the person feels disinterested or closed-off.

5. Hands and fingers

From excitable hand-flapping to obscene gestures, we can use our hands to express a lot of emotions. Being aware of the hands and fingers is an important part of learning how to read body language.

Examples of using the hands and fingers for nonverbal communication include:

• Giving a thumbs-up as a sign of approval
• Using the index and middle fingers to form a forward-facing V-sign to indicate victory
• Raising a clenched fist to indicate anger or solidarity
• Clasping hands behind your back   to indicate anxiety   or boredom
• Rapidly tapping fingers to express irritation or frustration
• Standing with hands on the hips   to indicate control   or aggression

The torso also offers a few important body language examples:

• An erect posture and open torso (rather than being shielded by crossed arms) can show confidence,   assertiveness , and attention.
• A slouched posture can indicate boredom, disinterest, and being closed-off.

The mouth makes some of the most important body language signs. Examples include:

• Smiling to show happiness , approval, sarcasm, or cynicism
• Biting the lower lip to indicate insecurity or   worry
• Covering the mouth to hide a reaction such as a genuine smile or smirk
• Pursing the lips to indicate disapproval, distrust, or annoyance

Knowing   how to read positive body language can help you in business   and social contexts. Here are a few things to look out for:

1. Having good posture

If someone is sitting up straight, it’s a sign they’re   paying attention   to what you’re saying. An open posture also indicates friendliness.

2. Maintaining eye contact 

There’s a difference between maintaining eye contact and staring or glaring. 

If someone makes a healthy amount of direct eye contact with you, it means they’re engaged in the conversation and paying attention. It’s normal for them to blink and look away occasionally. 

If someone stares or glares at you, it’s usually not a positive sign.

3. Leaning in to listen

Various body language signs indicate that someone is   listening to what you’re saying . If their head and torso are turned in your direction and they’re leaning toward you, it means   they’re listening . 

Other positive signs include nodding their head, sitting with arms and legs uncrossed, and aiming an ear in your direction.

4. Keeping the body still

If a person’s body is still, it can mean they’re relaxed. It can also indicate that they’re focused and paying attention to what you’re saying.

If the person’s emotion or attitude isn’t clear from how still their body is, look at the other types of nonverbal behavior on display.

5. A firm handshake

If someone gives you a firm handshake, it’s a sign that they respect you. 

If they were the one to reach out to shake hands, they probably have healthy self-confidence. A firm handshake should not be painful, as that can be intimidating.

Your knowledge of body language psychology should also include negative signs. 

When you can recognize the following signs in your audience, you can change tactics or express your message in another way.

If you become aware that you’re using negative nonverbal cues, you can consciously change them to positive cues. This is a way of supporting or encouraging the speaker by letting them know you’re interested — or by disguising the fact that you’re not interested.

In situations where discretion is best, you can use negative types of nonverbal communication to express distrust, disinterest, or disapproval.

Negative body language examples include:

1. Bad posture or slouching

If the person you’re communicating with is slouched or tense, it’s a sign that they’re bored. They might also feel disinterested, threatened, or worried. 

You can use verbal and nonverbal cues to reassure them or to regain their interest.

2. Avoiding eye contact

If someone avoids making eye contact with you, it could be a negative sign for one or more reasons. 

Having a lot of eye movement and not making eye contact may indicate that they’re disinterested or distracted. They might be trying to hide something, or they feel uncomfortable or guilty. 

3. Crossed arms

Interpreting crossed arms is one of the basics of learning how to read body language, as it’s one of the classic negative signs. 

Crossed arms are likely to show that the person feels defensive or closed-off to you and your message. It can also indicate aggression or anger.

4. Fidgeting and unable to keep still

If someone is fidgeting or unable to keep still, it’s a sign that they are distracted, bored, or uninterested in what you are saying.   Stress can also cause fidgeting . 

Common types of fidgeting include foot-tapping, crossing and uncrossing of legs, or consistently playing with an object such as a pen.

5. Negative facial expressions

A range of facial expressions can indicate negative attitudes or emotions. Recognizing them can help you understand your audience’s actual responses to your message. 

Frowning may indicate disagreement, anger, or confusion. 

Pursed lips usually indicate annoyance, displeasure, and distaste. 

Flared nostrils may show aggression or disapproval. Or they can indicate that the person is making a judgment about something.

Learning how to read body language, as well as how to use it consciously, is   an important soft skill   that has many benefits in the workplace and outside of it.   Upskilling   yourself with powerful   communication skills   will help you move your career forward.

Reading body language can help you better respond to your audience, whether they’re family members, friends, or coworkers. You can tailor your communication to them when you can identify what engages and interests them.

You can use different types of nonverbal communication to:

• Repeat and strengthen your verbal message
• Complement your verbal message
• Substitute for a verbal message
• Accent elements of your message

Improve your body language understanding with   coaching from BetterUp . Building effective communication skills takes time, but the effects are worth the effort both professionally and personally.

Request a custom demo   to get started.

Elevate your communication skills

Unlock the power of clear and persuasive communication. Our coaches can guide you to build strong relationships and succeed in both personal and professional life.

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

Understanding social learning theory to enhance your life

Purpose of the emotion anger: how anger can actually be helpful, how to find inner peace, identifying weaponized incompetence & how to stop it, how to stop catastrophizing and cut back on negative thinking, how emotions affect learning: the impact of emotions, understanding the role of reaction formation in our daily lives, where’s your stress from learn about different types of stressors, the unspoken truth about trauma: how it truly affects your life, 10 simple ways to work on self-improvement, covid ptsd is real — and here’s how to get through it, feeling lost: signs, causes, and 4 tips for finding your way, building resilience part 6: what is self-efficacy, understanding the difference between sympathy and empathy, how to practice relaxation techniques when your mind won’t turn off, is poor mental health and well-being contagious, learn how to let go of resentment to find inner peace, seeing my divorce as a catalyst for positive change, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

3100 E 5th Street, Suite 350 Austin, TX 78702

• Platform Overview
• Integrations
• Powered by AI
• BetterUp Lead™
• BetterUp Manage™
• BetterUp Care®
• Sales Performance
• Diversity & Inclusion
• Case Studies
• Why BetterUp?
• About Coaching
• Find your Coach
• Career Coaching
• Communication Coaching
• Life Coaching
• News and Press
• Leadership Team
• Become a BetterUp Coach
• BetterUp Labs
• Center for Purpose & Performance
• Leadership Training
• Business Coaching
• Contact Support
• Contact Sales
• Privacy Policy
• Acceptable Use Policy
• Trust & Security
• Cookie Preferences

How to read body language (like a pro)

In this article, I’ll give you some tips that’ll teach you how to read body language like a pro. I won’t be discussing specific body language gestures but general things that you should keep in mind while decoding body language.

Mastering non-verbal communication skills will turn you into a magician. You’ll be able to predict the future behaviour of people, you’ll be able to understand what’s on a person’s mind without talking to them and you’ll know what kind of a conversation a group is having by simply watching it from a distance.

But, of course, this kind of power has to be earned- you don’t get it by having a magic wand waved over your head or by chanting mantras. You have to work for it.

I recommend that you continue reading this post only after you’ve read at least some of the posts in the body language section so that you may get a good idea about the advantages of learning body language.

Okay, so what are the things you need to do in order to become the David Copperfield of body language?

1) Keep your eyes open

I know that your eyes are already open but do they see as much as they can? For most, the answer is no. We humans have selective attention. We filter out everything from the environment that we consider unimportant. 

Once you learn body language, a whole new world will open up to you. You’ll feel like you were blind before. How could you ever miss so many obvious signs?

What actually happens when you seriously start to learn body language is that your mind starts to realize how important it is.

Before, it was just useless data that your conscious mind simply filtered out without bothering much about it. But now every movement, every gesture is important. It may give a clue as to what a person’s thinking.

Learning and practising body language will open up your awareness dramatically. A cascade of information will flow into your mind whenever you see or meet people.

This information will initially seem overwhelming but don’t worry your mind will gradually adapt to this new way of seeing the world. You’ll reach a point where observing body language as you go along with your normal life will become a  habit , a second nature.

This overwhelming awareness, however, can piss some people off. They might want to back off and ‘forget about it’ because it is simply too much mental work. So they soon start to unlearn their non-verbal skills and go back to their previous, comfortable level of awareness.

Like I said, your mind will gradually adapt to this high-level awareness so you don’t need to freak out. The benefits of developing non-verbal skills far outweigh the initial discomfort that it may cause. 

2) Observe yourself as much as you observe others

Learning body language is all about understanding how our emotional state is reflected in our body movements and gestures in different situations. The more you observe body language and interpret it correctly, the more the skill will solidify in your mind.

You always have to connect a gesture with what’s going on in a person’s mind. But there’s no way you can peek into a person’s mind to see what they’re thinking, in case you wanted to confirm your observations. All you can do is watch their actions and hear their words.

But that’s not the case when you’re observing yourself. By watching your own body language in different situations, you’ll master your non-verbal skills in no time because you’re already in your head and you know what you’re thinking. So you can confirm the meaning of different gestures easily and quickly without much ambiguity.

Again, awareness matters here or to be more precise- self-awareness. Only by watching your thoughts and then relating them to your gestures can you engrave non-verbal skills more deeply in your mind.

Your skill in reading others’ emotional states will be in direct proportion of how well you understand your own emotional states and their associated gestures.

3) Time reveals all

The whole purpose of reading body language is to be able to understand a person’s emotional state before they verbalize it or act upon it. Observing gestures in an isolated manner is a grave mistake.

You not only need to look at the context in which a gesture is done but you also need to take note of the preceding and succeeding gestures to fully understand a person’s emotional state.

Oftentimes, when the body language of a person is ambiguous, the gestures that the person did a few seconds earlier or the gestures that he does a few seconds later reveal what actually was on his mind.

So don’t look at things individually. Keep the whole picture in mind. If the preceding gestures don’t give you a clue then the succeeding gestures most likely will. Time will reveal all.

4) Learn from mistakes

Your non-verbal skills will be as good as the number of mistakes you make when you start practising, period. If you’re making mistakes it means you’re sharpening your axe, honing your skills. 

When you start out reading body language, you’ll make a lot of mistakes. If you don’t, something is wrong. You’re either jumping to conclusions or you simply haven’t understood body language. 

As you continue practising, you’ll notice that you’re making lesser and lesser mistakes. This is true for any skill, not just body language. If you stick with it, you’ll soon reach a skill level that will amaze you.

You’ll thank the heavens for not quitting early on when it all seemed to be going nowhere.

Keep practising. Every mistake has something to teach so be prepared to make a lot of them.

Hi, I’m Hanan Parvez (MA Psychology). I’ve published over 500 articles and authored one book. My work has been featured in Forbes , Business Insider , Reader’s Digest , and Entrepreneur .

• ABOUT UBIQUITY
• TOPIC AREAS
• EDITORIAL BOARD
• CONTRIBUTE TO UBIQUITY
• ORGANIZE A SYMPOSIUM
• BECOME AN EDITOR
• PERMISSIONS
• BLOG@UBIQUITY
• COMMUNICATION
• MAKE A PITCH
• COMMENTARIES
• CALL FOR CONTRIBUTIONS
• PHILIP YAFEE
• JOHN STUCKEY
• ESPEN ANDERSEN
• GOUTAM KUMAR SAHA
• ABOUT COLLECTIONS
• BROWSE OTHER ACM PUBLICATIONS
• ADD THIS WEBSITE
• SEND US FEEDBACK
• PRINT THIS PAGE

How to effectively use body language

Volume 2021, Number February (2021), Pages 1-6

Communication Corner: How to effectively use body language Philip Yaffe DOI: 10.1145/3447263

Each " Communication Corner " essay is self-contained; however, they build on each other. For best results, before reading this essay and doing the exercise, go to the first essay " How an Ugly Duckling Became a Swan ," then read each succeeding essay. Learn how to use body language when delivering a speech or presentation. This installment of Communication Corner presents the practical aspects of body language such as eye contact, gestures, and vocal intonation to name a few.

Some people claim how you deliver a speech is much more important than what you actually say, in particular "body language." This is nonsense. If your objective is to convey important information and ideas, or to convince people to consider and adopt your point of view, words are crucial. No matter how effectively you employ your body, if people can't easily understand and assimilate what you are saying, your effort is useless.

This can easily be demonstrated. Many great orators of the early to mid-20th century moved audiences—and indeed changed the course of history—via radio, where body language was not an option.

This is not to say the various elements of body language are not important, but they should be kept in proportion; otherwise, they can become seriously detrimental.

For example, some speakers regularly pace back and forth in front of an audience because they believe movement attracts and holds the audience's attention. Indeed, it does. However, when movement is mechanical and as predictable as a metronome, it has exactly the opposite effect. Likewise, speakers who mechanically wave their hands around or constantly shift their weight from one foot to the other are making the same mistake.

The true purpose of body language is not to focus attention on the speaker, but to emphasize what they are saying. Movements that take on a life of their own are counterproductive.

So what should be the proportion between words and movement in a successful oral presentation? This question has no answer, because it makes no sense. It all depends on what the speaker is saying and what kind of response they seek to achieve.

Perhaps the best overall advice on the subject comes from Toastmasters International, the worldwide club (not a school) devoted to improving public speaking. In their manual for members (some 360,000 individuals across 145 countries), they say:

Body language should look natural and unrehearsed, and be consistent with the words being spoken. Using body language that is comfortable for you and enjoyable for your audience takes thought and practice. After you have drafted your speech, read it and note any places where body language would be appropriate and help convey your message. Try several different ways of using your arms, hands, and facial expressions. Match your gestures to your words. You should be compelled to gesture and make facial expressions when your thought requires such action.

In short, body language must complement and reinforce your words, never overpower them.

With this theoretical framework in mind, let's look at some of the practical aspects of body language.

Eye Contact

The first thing on virtually everyone's list of body language components is eye contact. This is because if you can make some kind of personal bond with your audience, i.e. if they feel that they are being recognized as individuals, they will pay closer attention and give greater credence to what you are saying.

Many novice speakers seem to want to look anywhere but at the audience, e.g. at the floor, the ceiling, the walls, their notes, their hands. When they do look at the audience, it is almost as if they are looking at an amorphous blob, or right through them as if they weren't even there.

It is not enough to just regularly gaze around the room as if your head were on a swivel. Each time you move you gaze, try to focus on a single individual listener. Look them directly in the eyes for 5–10 seconds. The larger the audience, the less apparent it will be at who you are looking, but this doesn't matter. The important thing is to look at them as individuals, not as a group.

Facial Expressions

Express emotion with facial expressions. If you are pleased by something, smile. If you are disturbed by something, look perplexed. If you are calling the audience to action, show determination. In short, whatever you are feeling, try to inscribe it on your face. In principle, your words and tone of voice should be enough; however, emphasis shown by an appropriate facial expression can significantly boost the effect.

Unconscious Gestures

Unconscious gestures are those you do without being aware of them. They are perhaps best described as "distracting mannerisms." Since they add nothing to your presentation, they can only detract from it. Unconscious gestures include such things as fidgeting, twitching, lip biting, key jingling, hands in the pockets or behind the back, etc.

Such distracting gestures are difficult to overcome by yourself because they are unconscious; you are not aware that you are doing them. A good way to overcome them is to videotape yourself while you are practicing a speech. Another way is to have a friend observe you while you are practicing a speech.

Perhaps the best way is to join a self-help group such as Toastmasters International. Some distracting mannerisms may not reveal themselves during a practice session, but only when you are in front of an audience. Noting and helping members overcome these distracting mannerisms in front of a live audience is integral to what Toastmaster meetings are all about.

Conscious Gestures

Conscious gestures are those that you use deliberately because they add energy and increase the impact of your presentation. The number of such gestures is almost limitless. As Toastmasters advises, the key thing is that your gestures should match your words. You should be compelled to gesture and make facial expressions when your thought requires such action.

For example, counting off a series of items on your fingers; holding your hands apart to show height or length; or drawing a square, a circle, a triangle in the air with your hands to show the shape of something, etc.

On occasion, you may also wish to use your entire body. For example:

• When you want to emphasize something, take a step or two toward the audience, which suggests that you are taking them into your confidence.
• When you have completed one section of your presentation and want to start on the next, take a couple of steps to the left or right of the speaking area. Ideally, this maneuver should be made without speaking. The two or three seconds of silence necessary for the movement is a clear signal to the audience that an important change in the presentation is about to take place.

The number of ways you can effectively use your body to reinforce your words is virtually endless. But at all times, bear in mind that reinforcing your words is the overriding purpose of body language. You should be compelled to make such gestures because your words call for them. Otherwise, leave them alone.

How to Effectively Use Vocal Variety

Have you ever read a text where virtually every sentence contained at least one word in italics, or one word underlined, or double underlined? And virtually every sentence was punctuated with an exclamation mark, or two exclamation marks, or even three exclamation marks? If you have, chances are you didn't read much of it.

It is the writer's craft (it is not an art) to make their appeal by the words they choose and how they weave them into clear, concise, logically structured sentences and paragraphs. Weighing down writing with such obvious attention-soliciting artifices as double underlining and multiple exclamation marks not only betrays the writer's lack of skill, it is seriously counterproductive.

On the other hand, a speech delivered without analogous oral artifices is equally counterproductive because most listeners are likely to find it dull, tedious, and soporific.

Why this dichotomy?

Fundamentally, it is because with a text, the reader sets the environment and controls the flow of information. With a speech, the listener controls nothing; they are dependent on the speaker.

Oral artifices employed to guide the listener's attention come under the heading "vocal variety." They are used to emphasize key words and phrases by raising and lowering the volume of the voice, raising and lowering the pitch of the voice, emphasizing and de-emphasizing specific words. And often by apparently doing nothing at all, i.e. pausing.

Judicious use of vocal variety ensures listeners receive each point of emphasis and nuance that otherwise would go by too quickly for them to capture and analyze it. Moreover, the use of vocal variety is entertaining.

However, we must be careful not to go to extremes. Each vocal variety artifice must be used for a purpose—and that purpose must be to help the listener glean as much as possible from the presentation as quickly and agreeably as possible. And in particular, to ensure the key ideas of the presentation will be understood and retained days, weeks, and even months later.

To achieve this objective, you should build in vocal variety as you prepare your oral presentation.

It is usually preferable not to do this in the first draft, which should be dedicated to getting down all your relevant information in reasonably comprehensible form. Starting from the second draft (all oral presentations require at least two drafts), look for places where vocal variety could help your cause, and then clearly mark them.

The four principal types of vocal variety you will want to consider are:

• Pace. One of the easiest ways to give emphasis to a phrase or a sentence is simply to slow down from your normal pace as you say it. Listeners can't help but notice that a change is taking place, so they pay closer attention.
• Pitch. Use pitch to help convey different emotions. A sad voice will have a different pitch than a happy one; an excited voice will have a different pitch than a bored one, etc.
• Volume. Volume (loudness) is also a good way to express emotions. A sad voice will have a different volume than a happy one; an excited voice will have a different volume than a bored one, etc.
• Pause. The simple pause (1–3 seconds of silence) is perhaps the most overlooked—and therefore most underused—form of vocal variety. It is also one of the most important. As all professional entertainers know, not saying something (timing) often speaks volumes.

Philip Yaffe was born in Boston, Massachusetts, in 1942 and grew up in Los Angeles, where he graduated from the University of California with a degree in mathematics and physics. In his senior year, he was also editor-in-chief of the Daily Bruin , UCLA's daily student newspaper. He has more than 40 years of experience in journalism and international marketing communication. At various points in his career, he has been a teacher of journalism, a reporter/feature writer with The Wall Street Journal , an account executive with a major international press relations agency, European marketing communication director with two major international companies, and a founding partner of a specialized marketing communication agency in Brussels, Belgium, where he has lived since 1974. He is the author of more than 30 books, which can be found easily in Amazon Kindle.

2021 Copyright held by the Owner/Author.

The Digital Library is published by the Association for Computing Machinery. Copyright © 2021 ACM, Inc.

Your Name (Required)

Your E-Mail address (Required)

Comment (Required - HTML syntax is not allowed and will be removed)

• COLLECTIONS

• Effective Communication: Improving Your Interpersonal Skills

Conflict Resolution Skills

Improving emotional intelligence (eq), anger management: help for anger issues, managing conflict with humor.

• The 5 Love Languages and Their Influence on Relationships
• Gaslighting: Turning Off the Gas on Your Gaslighter
• Online Therapy: Is it Right for You?
• Mental Health
• Health & Wellness
• Children & Family
• Relationships

Are you or someone you know in crisis?

• Bipolar Disorder
• Eating Disorders
• Grief & Loss
• Personality Disorders
• PTSD & Trauma
• Schizophrenia
• Therapy & Medication
• Exercise & Fitness
• Healthy Eating
• Well-being & Happiness
• Weight Loss
• Work & Career
• Illness & Disability
• Heart Health
• Childhood Issues
• Learning Disabilities
• Family Caregiving
• Teen Issues
• Communication
• Emotional Intelligence
• Love & Friendship
• Domestic Abuse
• Healthy Aging
• Aging Issues
• Alzheimer’s Disease & Dementia
• Senior Housing
• End of Life
• Meet Our Team

What is body language?

The importance of body language, types of body language and nonverbal communication, how body language can go wrong, how to improve nonverbal communication, tip 1: learn to manage stress in the moment, tip 2: develop your emotional awareness, tip 3: better read body language, body language and nonverbal communication communicating without words.

Your facial expressions, gestures, posture, and tone of voice are powerful communication tools. Here’s how to read and use body language to build better relationships at home and work.

Body language is the use of physical behavior, expressions, and mannerisms to communicate nonverbally, often done instinctively rather than consciously. Whether you’re aware of it or not, when you interact with others, you’re continuously giving and receiving wordless signals. All of your nonverbal behaviors—the gestures you make, your posture, your tone of voice, how much eye contact you make—send strong messages.

In fact, it’s not the words that you use but your nonverbal cues or body language that speak the loudest. They can put people at ease, build trust, and draw others towards you, or they can offend, confuse, and undermine what you’re trying to convey. These messages don’t stop when you stop speaking either. Even when you’re silent, you’re still communicating nonverbally.

In some instances, what comes out of your mouth and what you communicate through your body language may be two totally different things. If you say one thing, but your body language says something else, your listener will likely feel that you’re being dishonest. If you say “yes” while shaking your head no, for example. When faced with such mixed signals, the listener has to choose whether to believe your verbal or nonverbal message. Since body language is a natural, unconscious language that broadcasts your true feelings and intentions, they’ll likely choose the nonverbal message.

However, by improving how you understand and use body language and nonverbal communication, you can express what you really mean, connect better with others, and build stronger, more rewarding relationships—both in your personal and professional relationships.

Your nonverbal communication cues—the way you listen, look, move, and react—tell the person you’re communicating with whether or not you care, if you’re being truthful, and how well you’re listening. When your nonverbal signals match up with the words you’re saying, they increase trust, clarity, and rapport. When they don’t, they can generate tension, mistrust, and confusion.

If you want to become a better communicator, it’s important to become more sensitive not only to the body language and nonverbal cues of others, but also to your own.

Body language can play five roles:

• Repetition: It repeats and often strengthens the message you’re making verbally.
• Contradiction: It can contradict the message you’re trying to convey, thus indicating to your listener that you may not be telling the truth.
• Substitution: It can substitute for a verbal message. For example, your facial expression often conveys a far more vivid message than words ever can.
• Complementing: It may add to or complement your verbal message. As a boss, if you pat an employee on the back in addition to giving praise, it can increase the impact of your message.
• Accenting: It may accent or underline a verbal message. Pounding the table, for example, can underline the importance of your message.

The many different types of nonverbal communication or body language include:

Facial expressions. The human face is extremely expressive, able to convey countless emotions without saying a word. And unlike some forms of nonverbal communication, facial expressions are universal. The facial expressions for happiness, sadness, anger, surprise, fear, and disgust are the same across cultures.

Body movement and posture. Consider how your perceptions of people are affected by the way they sit, walk, stand, or hold their head. The way you move and carry yourself communicates a wealth of information to the world. This type of nonverbal communication includes your posture, bearing, stance, and the subtle movements you make.

Gestures. Gestures are woven into the fabric of our daily lives. You may wave, point, beckon, or use your hands when arguing or speaking animatedly, often expressing yourself with gestures without thinking. However, the meaning of some gestures can be very different across cultures. While the “OK” sign made with the hand, for example, usually conveys a positive message in English-speaking countries, it’s considered offensive in countries such as Germany, Russia, and Brazil. So, it’s important to be careful of how you use gestures to avoid misinterpretation.

Eye contact. Since the visual sense is dominant for most people, eye contact is an especially important type of nonverbal communication. The way you look at someone can communicate many things, including interest, affection, hostility, or attraction. Eye contact is also important in maintaining the flow of conversation and for gauging the other person’s interest and response.

Touch. We communicate a great deal through touch. Think about the very different messages given by a weak handshake, a warm bear hug, a patronizing pat on the head, or a controlling grip on the arm, for example.

Space. Have you ever felt uncomfortable during a conversation because the other person was standing too close and invading your space? We all have a need for physical space, although that need differs depending on the culture, the situation, and the closeness of the relationship. You can use physical space to communicate many different nonverbal messages, including signals of intimacy and affection, aggression or dominance.

Voice. It’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it. When you speak, other people “read” your voice in addition to listening to your words. Things they pay attention to include your timing and pace, how loud you speak, your tone and inflection, and sounds that convey understanding, such as “ahh” and “uh-huh.” Think about how your tone of voice can indicate sarcasm, anger, affection, or confidence.

Can nonverbal communication be faked?

There are many books and websites that offer advice on how to use body language to your advantage. For example, they may instruct you on how to sit a certain way, steeple your fingers, or shake hands in order to appear confident or assert dominance. But the truth is that such tricks aren’t likely to work (unless you truly feel confident and in charge). That’s because you can’t control all of the signals you’re constantly sending about what you’re really thinking and feeling. And the harder you try, the more unnatural your signals are likely to come across.

However, that doesn’t mean that you have no control over your nonverbal cues. For example, if you disagree with or dislike what someone’s saying, you may use negative body language to rebuff the person’s message, such as crossing your arms, avoiding eye contact, or tapping your feet. You don’t have to agree, or even like what’s being said, but to communicate effectively and not put the other person on the defensive, you can make a conscious effort to avoid sending negative signals—by maintaining an open stance and truly attempting to understand what they’re saying, and why.

What you communicate through your body language and nonverbal signals affects how others see you, how well they like and respect you, and whether or not they trust you. Unfortunately, many people send confusing or negative nonverbal signals without even knowing it. When this happens, both connection and trust in relationships are damaged, as the following examples highlight:

• Jack believes he gets along great with his colleagues at work, but if you were to ask any of them, they would say that Jack is “intimidating” and “very intense.” Rather than just look at you, he seems to devour you with his eyes. And if he takes your hand, he lunges to get it and then squeezes so hard it hurts. Jack is a caring guy who secretly wishes he had more friends, but his nonverbal awkwardness keeps people at a distance and limits his ability to advance at work.
• Arlene is attractive and has no problem meeting eligible men, but she has a difficult time maintaining a relationship for longer than a few months. Arlene is funny and interesting, but even though she constantly laughs and smiles, she radiates tension. Her shoulders and eyebrows are noticeably raised, her voice is shrill, and her body is stiff. Being around Arlene makes many people feel anxious and uncomfortable. Arlene has a lot going for her that is undercut by the discomfort she evokes in others.
• Ted thought he had found the perfect match when he met Sharon, but Sharon wasn’t so sure. Ted is good looking, hardworking, and a smooth talker, but seemed to care more about his thoughts than Sharon’s. When Sharon had something to say, Ted was always ready with wild eyes and a rebuttal before she could finish her thought. This made Sharon feel ignored, and soon she started dating other men. Ted loses out at work for the same reason. His inability to listen to others makes him unpopular with many of the people he most admires.

These smart, well-intentioned people struggle in their attempt to connect with others. The sad thing is that they are unaware of the nonverbal messages they communicate.

[Read: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship]

If you want to communicate effectively, avoid misunderstandings, and enjoy solid, trusting relationships both socially and professionally, it’s important to understand how to use and interpret body language and improve your nonverbal communication skills.

Find your space for healing and growth

Regain is an online couples counseling service. Whether you’re facing problems with communication, intimacy, or trust, Regain’s licensed, accredited therapists can help you improve your relationship.

Nonverbal communication is a rapidly flowing back-and-forth process that requires your full focus on the moment-to-moment experience. If you’re planning what you’re going to say next, checking your phone, or thinking about something else, you’re almost certain to miss nonverbal cues and not fully understand the subtleties of what’s being communicated.

As well as being fully present, you can improve how you communicate nonverbally by learning to manage stress and developing your emotional awareness.

Stress compromises your ability to communicate. When you’re stressed out, you’re more likely to misread other people, send confusing or off-putting nonverbal signals, and lapse into unhealthy knee-jerk patterns of behavior. And remember: emotions are contagious. If you are upset, it is very likely to make others upset, thus making a bad situation worse.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by stress, take a time out. Take a moment to calm down before you jump back into the conversation. Once you’ve regained your emotional equilibrium, you’ll feel better equipped to deal with the situation in a positive way.

The fastest and surest way to calm yourself and manage stress in the moment is to employ your senses—what you see, hear, smell, taste, and touch—or through a soothing movement. By viewing a photo of your child or pet, smelling a favorite scent, listening to a certain piece of music, or squeezing a stress ball, for example, you can quickly relax and refocus. Since everyone responds differently, you may need to experiment to find the sensory experience that works best for you.

In order to send accurate nonverbal cues, you need to be aware of your emotions and how they influence you. You also need to be able to recognize the emotions of others and the true feelings behind the cues they are sending. This is where emotional awareness comes in.

[Read: Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ)]

Being emotionally aware enables you to:

• Accurately read other people, including the emotions they’re feeling and the unspoken messages they’re sending.
• Create trust in relationships by sending nonverbal signals that match up with your words.
• Respond in ways that show others that you understand and care.

Many of us are disconnected from our emotions—especially strong emotions such as anger, sadness, fear—because we’ve been taught to try to shut off our feelings. But while you can deny or numb your feelings, you can’t eliminate them. They’re still there and they’re still affecting your behavior. By developing your emotional awareness and connecting with even the unpleasant emotions, though, you’ll gain greater control over how you think and act. To start developing your emotional awareness, practice the mindfulness meditation in HelpGuide’s free Emotional Intelligence Toolkit .

Once you’ve developed your abilities to manage stress and recognize emotions, you’ll start to become better at reading the nonverbal signals sent by others. It’s also important to:

Pay attention to inconsistencies. Nonverbal communication should reinforce what is being said. Is the person saying one thing, but their body language conveying something else? For example, are they telling you “yes” while shaking their head no?

Look at nonverbal communication signals as a group. Don’t read too much into a single gesture or nonverbal cue. Consider all of the nonverbal signals you are receiving, from eye contact to tone of voice and body language. Taken together, are their nonverbal cues consistent—or inconsistent—with what their words are saying?

Trust your instincts. Don’t dismiss your gut feelings. If you get the sense that someone isn’t being honest or that something isn’t adding up, you may be picking up on a mismatch between verbal and nonverbal cues.

Evaluating body language and nonverbal signals

Eye contact – Is the person making eye contact? If so, is it overly intense or just right?

Facial expression – What is their face showing? Is it masklike and unexpressive, or emotionally present and filled with interest?

Tone of voice – Does the person’s voice project warmth, confidence, and interest, or is it strained and blocked?

Posture and gesture – Is their body relaxed or stiff and immobile? Are their shoulders tense and raised, or relaxed?

Touch – Is there any physical contact? Is it appropriate to the situation? Does it make you feel uncomfortable?

Intensity – Does the person seem flat, cool, and disinterested, or over-the-top and melodramatic?

Timing and place – Is there an easy flow of information back and forth? Do nonverbal responses come too quickly or too slowly?

Sounds – Do you hear sounds that indicate interest, caring or concern from the person?

More Information

• Take Control of Your Nonverbal Communication (video) - How to notice and use body language. (Harvard Business Review)
• Herrando, C., & Constantinides, E. (2021). Emotional Contagion: A Brief Overview and Future Directions. Frontiers in Psychology , 12 , 712606. Link
• How to Use All 5 Senses to Beat Stress | Psychology Today . (n.d.). Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link
• Wertheim, E., 2008.  The Importance of Effective Communication . Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link
• Segal, Jeanne. The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships (McGraw-Hill, 2008) Link
• De Stefani, Elisa, and Doriana De Marco. “Language, Gesture, and Emotional Communication: An Embodied View of Social Interaction.” Frontiers in Psychology 10 (September 24, 2019): 2063. Link
• Nonverbal Communications . (n.d.). Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link

More in Communication

Effective communication.

Tips for building communication skills

Tips for handling conflicts, arguments, and disagreements

Boost your EQ to help find happiness and success

How to feel and respond to the emotions of others

Tips and techniques for getting anger under control

Using laughter and play to resolve disagreements

The 5 Love Languages

What they are and how they influence relationships

Turning Off the Gas on Your Gaslighter

5 ways to deal with gaslighting

Professional therapy, done online

BetterHelp makes starting therapy easy. Take the assessment and get matched with a professional, licensed therapist.

Help us help others

Millions of readers rely on HelpGuide.org for free, evidence-based resources to understand and navigate mental health challenges. Please donate today to help us save, support, and change lives.

TED is supported by ads and partners 00:00

Reading minds through body language | Lynne Franklin | TEDxNaperville

23 Essential Body Language Examples and Their Meanings

Body language is the science of nonverbal signals. I’ve studied body language for over 10 years—here are my top body language cues you can use today.

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter

Learning to decode body language is powerful and one of the most important nonverbal communication skills.

This guide is your key to reading people AND having confident body language.

Watch our video below to learn how to read people and decode 7 body language cues:

In this article, we’re going to cover the essential must-knows to mastering your body language skills.

Before we dive in, be sure to take our body language quiz here to find out how good you are at reading body language!

What is Body Language?

Body language is the science of nonverbal signals such as gestures, facial expressions, and eye gaze that communicate a person’s emotions and intentions. In total, there are 11 types of body language that we use to communicate. Unlike words, body language is often done subconsciously and constitutes a large part of our communication.

Our founder at Science of People has identified 97 cues you should know. Get started with the 23 in this article. Want to learn them all? Check out:

Unlock the Secrets of Charisma

Control and leverage the tiny signals you’re sending – from your stance and facial expressions to your word choice and vocal tone – to improve your personal and professional relationships.

Why is Body Language So Important?

Body language is a key part of how we communicate with each other. It helps show our feelings and attitudes, even when our words say something different. Being good at understanding body language can make conversations better and help people get along well.

People who are good at reading body language typically excel in their careers, have great relationships, and get “freebies” in life.

If you want to learn more about the importance of body language, I recommend checking out my article here: 5 Powerful Reasons Why Body Language is Important .

Body language can be broken down into 2 major categories—positive or open body language and negative or closed body language.

And just like how they sound, these 2 broad categories of cues signal just how open (or closed) someone is from their external environment. Whether at a networking event talking to a random stranger you’ve just met, giving a presentation or speech or on a first date , knowing how to read these cues is key to knowing how receptive others are to you or the situation.

Reading body language is as close to mind reading as we can get.

Open Body Language Examples

The eyebrow flash.

When someone does an eyebrow flash, you’ll typically see their eyebrows raise slightly for less than ⅕ of a second.

What it Means: The eyebrow raise is a great sign of interest. People tend to use the eyebrow flash in 3 main ways:

• The eyebrow flash can show interest professionally, as when giving approval, agreeing to something, thanking someone, or seeking confirmation. It’s used as a nonverbal “yes” during conversation.
• The eyebrow flash can also show interest romantically.
• Or the eyebrow flash can show interest socially, as when 2 people recognize each other. It signals to the other person that you are happy to see them.

Whenever we use the eyebrow flash, we call attention to our face. Teachers and speakers often use it as a way to say, “Listen to this!” or “Look at me!”

Interestingly, some cultures like the Japanese find this cue indecent and avoid it 1 https://www.amazon.in/NCHI-Science-Technology-Medicine-Colonialindia/dp/0521055822 .

The Science: According to researchers 2 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/243768681_Human_facial_expressions_as_adaptations_Evolutionary_questions_in_facial_expression_research at the University of Pittsburgh, the eyebrow flash is a universally recognized form of greeting and can be found all over the world, suggesting that this gesture is common among all cultures.

This gesture is even used by monkeys and apes 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 !

How to Use it: There are so many ways to use the eyebrow flash. Here are a few:

• To Show Liking: When you see someone you like or who you want to like you, give them a quick eyebrow flash followed by a warm smile.
• To Increase Engagement: If you want someone to listen to something you are about to say, raise your eyebrows right before you deliver.
• To Show Interest: Are you curious? Your eyebrows are the best way to show it!

The Equal Handshake

An equal handshake has these 7 elements:

• good eye contact
• a warm, genuine smile
• an extended arm with a slight bend at the elbow
• fingers pointing downward while approaching the other person’s hand
• this one’s the big one —EQUAL pressure during the hand clasp
• slight forward lean toward the other person
• a slow release after 1–2 seconds

What it Means: This handshake is a breath of fresh air and signals mutual respect for both parties.

An equal handshake signals confidence, openness, and power during an interaction and leaves both participants feeling warm and fuzzy inside.

How to Use it: Before shaking hands, consider the context. Salespeople learned early on that an uninvited or surprise handshake from nowhere was damaging to their sales—the buyers obviously didn’t welcome them, and they felt forced to shake hands.

Handshakes also aren’t universal—some cultures commonly bow as a greeting, as they do in Japan, and people in other cultures give a kiss on the cheek, as they do in Italy or Spain.

A good rule of thumb is to only shake hands when you know the other person will warmly reciprocate it. Otherwise, a head nod is a good option—or wait for the other person to initiate the handshake.

On another important note, older people require less pressure, so avoid crushing an older person’s hand with your firm grip. When shaking hands with a higher-status individual, allow them to set the length and pressure of the handshake first, and follow up with an equal exchange for maximum bonding.

Authentic Mirroring

Displaying similar body language to other participants during a social situation.

What it Means: Mirroring is a highly rapport-building cue that signals a desire to connect with someone else. People tend to mirror only whom they like, and seeing someone else mirror our own body language creates a feeling of similarity and likeness.

The Science: Mirroring is powerful. Studies have shown that mirroring leads to the following:

• Greater compliance 4 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21375122/ with requests. So mirror if you want to persuade someone.
• Higher sales numbers 5 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/251630934_Retail_salespeople%27s_mimicry_of_customers_Effects_on_consumer_behavior . So be sure to mirror if you are in sales.
• Positive evaluations. So mirror your manager to build rapport.
• Even larger tips 6 http://j.b.legal.free.fr/Blog/share/M1/Articles%20INC/Mimicry/Mimicry%20for%20money.pdf from customers!

Mirroring others is literally hardwired into our brains. Professor Joseph Heinrich 7 https://henrich.fas.harvard.edu/files/henrich/files/henrichcv2017_oct.pdf from the University of Michigan explains that mirroring others helps us cooperate—which leads to more food, better health, and economic growth for communities.

How to Use it: Make sure to mirror subtly. If someone nods their head vigorously in agreement, and you do the same, you may come off as too obvious—this can lead to suspicion or decreased rapport.

You can also avoid mirroring someone entirely if you’re disinterested in them or want to create boundaries.

If the other person is displaying negative body language cues, try displaying open positive language cues yourself to get them to open up, instead of copying their closed gestures.

Mutual Gazing

Eye contact that is mutual—neither lacking eye contact nor being a little too interested.

What it Means: Longer eye contact, especially from people who are high-status, makes us feel favored. This is especially true when receiving eye contact from celebrities or movie stars 8 https://www.amazon.com/What-Every-Body-Saying-Speed-Reading/dp/0061438294 .

Increased eye contact also indicates the other person may be curious as when people are more attentive to their surroundings, their blink rate will generally decrease 1 https://www.amazon.in/NCHI-Science-Technology-Medicine-Colonialindia/dp/0521055822 .

Warning: Do not make 100% eye contact! That is actually a territorial signal and shows aggression. People often do it before a fight.

You want to do mutual gazing. Eye contact when you agree, when you are listening, when you are exchanging ideas, or when staring at your amazing self in the mirror!

The Science: Making eye contact just 30% of the time has been shown 9 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16081035/ to significantly increase what people remember you say.

You can also give a boost to your perceived persuasiveness, truthfulness, sincerity, and credibility just by mutual eye gazing 1 https://www.amazon.in/NCHI-Science-Technology-Medicine-Colonialindia/dp/0521055822 .

Interestingly, certain personality traits were found to relate to more mutual gazing—namely, extraversion, agreeableness, and openness 1 https://www.amazon.in/NCHI-Science-Technology-Medicine-Colonialindia/dp/0521055822 .

How to Use it: Increase your eye gaze to bond. However, make sure to glance away occasionally, since too much eye contact can be seen as threatening and make people feel uncomfortable.

This is a fake smile. This smile lacks the characteristic “crow’s feet” wrinkles around the corners of the eyes.

Lack of Barriers

Keeping objects (like phones, bags, or glasses) out of the way when talking signals that you are fully present and open to the interaction.

What it Means: Removing physical barriers between you and the other person indicates that you’re giving them your full attention.

Objects—anything from your notebook, coffee mug, or even a desk—can act as distractions or shields, so keeping the space clear demonstrates your interest in a meaningful exchange.

Even having your smartphone nearby can reduce your cognitive function 10 https://www.journals.uchicago.edu/doi/10.1086/691462 !

How to Use it: When you’re in a conversation, be mindful of any objects you may be holding or actions you might be performing that could create a barrier. Put your phone down or away, keep bags or other items to the side, and make sure your hands are free to gesture naturally. This will not only make you appear more open but will also encourage the other person to do the same.

Duchenne Smile

The Duchenne smile is a smile that signals true happiness and is characterized by the “crow’s feet” wrinkles around the corners of the eyes along with upturned corners of the mouth.

The opposite is a fake smile:

*Avoid at all costs*

What it Means: When you see a Duchenne smile, this likely indicates genuine happiness.

It is difficult, but not impossible, to fake a real smile. In most cases, we smile dozens of times in normal conversation, but many of these smiles are given out of politeness or formality.

The Science: Research shows that babies several weeks old will already use the Duchenne smile for their mothers only while using a more polite, social smile for others 8 https://www.amazon.com/What-Every-Body-Saying-Speed-Reading/dp/0061438294 .

People also tend to smile more with others than when alone—in fact, when we see a smiling face, endorphins are released into our system 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 .

Studies show that athletes will smile noticeably differently, whether they finish in first, second, or third place. This distinction was the same even in congenitally blind athletes who never even saw a smile before 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 .

How to Use it: When smiling, remember to “smile with your eyes” instead of just your mouth. It also helps to smile widely enough to bring the cheeks up, helping activate the muscles around your eyes. Remember to maintain the smile even after an encounter—in fake happiness encounters, you may often see an “on-off” smile that flashes and then vanishes quickly after 2 people in the interaction go their separate ways Peoplewatching .

Example: In this example, George W. Bush flashes a childish Duchenne smile ( “Oops, I got caught!”) when he tries to open a door, but fails:

Shared Laughter

Simultaneous laughter shared between individuals in response to a joke or funny observation.

What it Means: When you crack a joke and the other person shares a laugh with you, this is a good sign that they are open to connecting with you. Laughter is meant to establish potential relationships 11 http://www.mysmu.edu/faculty/normanli/Lietal2009.pdf or maintain existing ones, especially if the joke wasn’t particularly funny.

Laughter is also an indication that someone is relaxed, since stiff and nervous people usually do not laugh genuinely or instead may give a tense laugh if they feel nervous.

The Science: Neurologist Henri Rubenstein found that just one minute of laughter provides up to 45 minutes of subsequent relaxation 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 ! The relaxation boost you get certainly justifies watching your favorite comedians on TV.

As we age, we usually laugh less. Adults laugh an average of only 15 times per day, while preschoolers laugh 400 times daily 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 .

A great way to boost your laughter is to get more social! Robert Provine found that laughter is more than 30x more likely to occur in social situations than when a person is alone. In his study, participants were videotaped watching a funny video clip in 3 different situations:

• with a same-sex stranger, and
• with a same-sex friend.

Those who watched alone had significantly less laughter than those who watched with a stranger or friend.

How to Use it: Try incorporating humor into your conversations such as giving the opposite answer to a yes/no question.

Example: If people are expecting you to say yes, say no; if people are expecting you to say no, say yes instead. It’s simple but effective.

This is Jennifer Lawrence’s go-to strategy.

The World’s Funniest Joke In 2001, Richard Wiseman set out to find the world’s funniest joke. In his experiment, Wiseman set up a website named LaughLab 12 laughlab.co.uk , in which users could input their favorite joke, and participants could rate them. By the end of the project, which garnered 40,000 jokes and had over 350,000 participants from 70 countries, one joke was found to stand out above the rest: Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator says, “Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”

When using hand gestures, make sure you display your palms and don’t hide them from others. Pockets, hands behind back, and closed fists can all act as barriers against open palms.

What it Means: People who display open palms are seen as honest and sincere. It can also be used as a questioning gesture.

Have you ever been in a situation where you met someone, and they seem nice, but something inside you felt a bit… off? It might have been that their palms weren’t showing.

Evolutionarily, when we see closed palms, our brains receive signals that we might be in danger—after all, the other person could be brandishing a weapon or hiding something dangerous.

How to Use it: When gesturing with your hands, make sure your hands are open most of the time and that people can see your open palms. It is also a good idea to keep the palms facing upward most of the time rather than facing downward.

Leaning slightly toward the person you are communicating with shows that you are engaged and interested.

What it Means: Leaning in while talking to someone usually signals that you are fully present and interested in the conversation. This action draws you physically closer to the other person, building a sense of intimacy and focus. It can be a strong indicator of attentiveness and a desire to understand or connect with the other person.

The Science: Studies 13 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/259128505_Inclined_to_better_understanding-The_coordination_of_talk_and_’leaning_forward’_in_doing_repair have shown that leaning in can actually facilitate better understanding and communication. It creates what psychologists call “proximity,” or closeness, that encourages more open sharing of information.

How to Use it: Leaning in should be a natural and subtle move, not an exaggerated lunge! Use this body language cue when you truly want to engage with someone—whether you’re trying to understand what they’re saying or show that you agree with them.

However, it’s crucial to gauge the other person’s comfort level; leaning in too aggressively or when the other person is leaning away can create major discomfort.

Appropriate touches like a gentle pat on the back or arm can convey openness and empathy.

What it Means: Using a warm touch, such as a pat on the back or a light touch on the arm, often signals that you’re emotionally present and attuned to the other person’s needs or feelings. This gesture can create an immediate bond, break tension, or offer comfort.

The Science: Touch triggers the release of oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone” or “bonding hormone,” which plays a significant role in social bonding and attachment. This can also depend on the context (some people may not like to be touched), but oxytocin-increasing effects can even last after a conversation 14 https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2023/05/230509122117.htm .

Research 15 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1088868316650307 has shown that appropriate touch can reduce stress hormones, lower heart rate, and increase feelings of trust and security.

How to Use it: Warm touch can be a powerful way to connect, but it’s essential to be aware of the other person’s comfort zone and cultural norms. A well-timed pat on the back can enhance a friendly conversation or provide consolation in a more serious moment. Use warm touch judiciously, always being aware of cues that indicate whether the other person is receptive to this level of contact.

Closed Body Language Examples

Crossed ankles.

The feet are crossed, and one ankle lies on top of the other. This can be done whether sitting or standing—or even with the feet on the table.

What it Means: A person crossing their ankles might feel uncomfortable and closed-off, although there is an exception (I’ll talk about that below). The tighter their ankles are locked, the more anxiety or stress the person may be experiencing.

Women often sit with their ankles locked 8 https://www.amazon.com/What-Every-Body-Saying-Speed-Reading/dp/0061438294 , especially if they are wearing a skirt. However, it is unnatural to sit like this for a prolonged period of time and should be considered strange, especially if done by males.

When taken a step further, people may lock their feet around the legs of a chair under high-stress situations. I call this the “ejection seat” position because it’s something many people would do if they were about to be launched out of their seat.

The big exception to this rule is if you see the ankles crossed while legs are outstretched on the floor. This can be a relaxed posture with the legs taking up space.

The Science: In a study of 319 dental patients by the Peases 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 , ankle locking was a common body language cue done by most patients: 68% of patients getting a checkup locked their ankles, 89% of patients locked their ankles as soon as they sat in their chair to get some dental work done, and a whopping 98% of them ankle-locked when they received an injection.

It’s safe to say that these patients felt de-feeted during this situation!

Hand Clasping

When we don’t have someone else to hold onto, we might choose to hold our own hand. Sometimes we interlace our fingers, and other times we hug one hand on top of the other.

Here’s an interesting fact: every time we interlock our fingers, one thumb is on top, and this is our dominant thumb Peoplewatchig . For most people, it feels super weird if we switch thumbs and put our dominant one underneath!

What it Means: Interlaced fingers are a form of “self-hug.” Essentially, people who perform this gesture are comforting themselves with their hands, and it acts as a nostalgic reminder of the security we felt when holding hands with our parents as kids.

As adults we do this when we’re insecure—you’ll find this during overly formal events or when meeting a nervous client at work.

How to Use it: Use this gesture if you want to conclude a meeting or end an interaction with someone. If you want to appear confident, you can even use this cue but with your thumbs stuck out—this signals confidence instead of stress.

If you see someone with interlaced fingers and want to open them up, try humor. Once they start laughing, you’ll see their body language start opening up!

Have you ever seen a fencing bout before? These guys are on their feet, constantly moving back and forth in a game of who-can-stab-the-other-guy-first. It’s basically chess but with swords.

But the way that fencers use their stance is exactly what people do when closing off. When blading, the torso is turned away, maximizing reach, while minimizing damage to the oh-so-vulnerable frontal parts in the event of contact.

Since up to 90% 16 https://www.livescience.com/what-causes-left-handedness.html of people are right-handed, when you see blading, the left foot (which is also non-dominant in most cases) is usually the one that steps forward, or the right foot may step backward.

What it Means: Blading can commonly be seen right before a fight begins. You can see it before a bar fight breaks loose, during a boxing match, or if you made a statement your conversation partner doesn’t agree is correct.

If you’re talking to a buddy in a front-to-front situation, and you see him blade all of a sudden, he might be feeling a bit defensive or threatened.

An exception to blading is when both people are observing an event and square up shoulder-to-shoulder such as sitting on the couch and watching TV together.

Thumbs Hidden

The thumbs are hidden away from view such as inside pockets or even wrapped around the other fingers.

What it Means: Usually a display of lower self-confidence, hiding thumbs usually signals concern, insecurity, or feelings of threat. High-status people have been observed to do this sometimes when relaxing 8 https://www.amazon.com/What-Every-Body-Saying-Speed-Reading/dp/0061438294 but never when they’re “on.”

Dogs also perform a similar cue by hiding their ears during times of stress. They do this in order to streamline themselves in case they need to make a mad dash… like if they manage to bite a hole through their $50 doggy bed while you were out dining with your partner (oddly specific?).

How to Use it: Around close friends and trusted others it’s totally fine to relax your hands in your pockets once in a while. But if you want to make the other person feel a bit insecure for whatever reason, sticking your hands deep in your pockets is a surefire way to do it!

a) confidence . Even though the hands are inside the pockets, the big difference here is that the thumbs are sticking out. Thumbs are also the most powerful digits of your hand. When they are displayed confidently, this can often indicate confidence or power in a given situation.

Neck Rubbing

When people rub their necks they’ll usually do it on the side or back of the neck. In more extreme cases, you’ll see the suprasternal notch, which is the part where your neck meets your clavicle, being touched (usually more in women).

What it Means: People usually rub their neck when feeling insecure or stressed. For some people this is their go-to method to relieve stress:

Those who habitually rub the neck also have a tendency to be more negative or critical 3 https://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language-attitudes/dp/1409168506 than others.

The Science: When the nerve on the side of the neck called the vagus nerve is massaged, acetylcholine, a neurotransmitter that sends signals to the heart, causes the heart rate to go down.

A Deadly Example: Warning: This example contains graphic content.

In the formal interview of a Canadian-born Chinese-Vietnamese woman named Jennifer Pan, she told detectives that her parents were murdered in her house by 3 unknown thugs.

However, the interview officially turned into an interrogation when the detectives became suspicious. They noticed her story didn’t line up, and the nonverbal cues she displayed weren’t quite normal for her situation. It turns out that she actually staged the murder herself, and she was faking her story the entire time!

One nonverbal cue she consistently displayed that signaled high stress was touching her suprasternal notch (timestamp 36:47):

Physical Retreat

Stepping back or leaning away from someone suggests you may be disinterested or uncomfortable.

What it Means: If you find yourself stepping back or leaning away during a conversation, it usually indicates a desire for more personal space , which could stem from discomfort, disinterest, or even distrust. This physical retreat serves as a subtle cue that you’re not fully engaged in the interaction.

The Science: A physical retreat often triggers psychological mechanisms related to the fight-or-flight response, such as increasing adrenaline 17 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0924977X20302546 , signaling to others that you are in a defensive or guarded state, or even want to run away.

How to Use it: Being aware of your own tendencies to step back or lean away can help you better understand your feelings in a given situation. If you notice yourself retreating, it might be worth asking yourself why you feel the need to create more physical distance. On the flip side, if you notice someone else retreating, it could be a signal for you to reassess the situation and perhaps change your approach.

Hunched Shoulders

How many times have you heard “shoulders back, head straight!”

Believe it or not, hunched shoulders are becoming even more common nowadays, as you’ll see people slumped over, looking at their cellphones. Over time this might even become the norm as people develop chronically-hunched shoulders from staring at smartphones and hunched over laptops all day.

All kidding aside, people who are super submissive in social situations like those with clinical depression or self-proclaimed “social failures” may also walk with a permanent stoop and with shoulders rounded and their neck hunched forward.

Meaning: This is a naturally defensive posture. Forward shoulders may indicate that someone is trying to hide something or feeling vulnerable, since this posture closes off your vulnerable neck and chest areas.

You’ll also rarely see this in fashion shows and magazines, as it instantly drops your attraction value. This cue literally reminds me of a turtle withdrawing into its shell.

Perhaps a better name for this cue would be “turtling!”

Rubbing Eyes

People who rub their eyes usually use their index finger, middle, or thumb to get in on that eyelid action. It can range either from a gentle, split-second touch to more obvious rubbing.

What it Means: Rubbing the eyelids really helps people calm down as it acts like a “visual reset.” Essentially what you’re saying when you rub your eyes is this: “Look, please go away. I wish everything in front of me would just vanish!” You’ll typically see this gesture with high-stakes poker players as soon as they lose a hand or during an argument between an angry and frustrated couple.

Of course, people naturally do this to get those nasty eye boogies out so always take into account how tired someone is before placing a negative label on them.

The Science: Rubbing the eyelids stimulates a special nerve in the eyelids called the vagus nerve 18 https://www.livescience.com/vagus-nerve.html which helps slow down heart and breathing rates when it’s massaged.

You can also see people rub their eyelids during conversations and interrogations when they are asked a difficult or stress-inducing question. They want to cut off eye contact to reduce their own stress or anxiety.

You may often see this gesture more in men than women because women might be conditioned to avoid rubbing their eyes, especially if they wear eye makeup.

How to Use It: Having a hard day at work? Try closing your eyes in a safe space and gently rubbing your eyelids while taking a breath. I’ve found just 30 seconds of this helps immensely and gives a sense of calm during a stressful day.

Fidgeting with Objects

Fidgeting involves playing with nearby objects, such as keys, coins, a pen, a ring, or a necklace. And yes, even with the infamous fidget spinner.

What it Means: Fidgeting typically signals boredom. Bored of talking, bored of sitting down, and yes—even bored of you ( ouch!) .

People who fidget may be subconsciously desiring sensory reassurance 19 https://books.google.com/books?id=7xzhVIwIqSMC&lpg=PA180&ots=BWWFrFNWBP&dq=desmond%20morris%20putting%20objects%20mouth&pg=PA180#v=onepage&q=desmond%20morris%20putting%20objects%20mouth&f=false . This is similar to how babies hold onto their favorite toy. Other times, it may mean that people are anxious or short on time—and in some cases, even disappointed.

The Science: Observations at railway stations and airports revealed that there are 10x as many displacement activities in flying situations than in ordinary circumstances. In other words, people fidget a lot when they’re about to fly. These behaviors include the following:

• checking tickets
• taking out passports and putting them away
• rearranging hand baggage
• making sure their wallet is in place
• dropping things and picking them up

In contrast only 8% of people boarding a train showed signs of fidgeting compared to 80% of people at a check-in desk of a jumbo-jet flight across the Atlantic Desmong People .

How to Use it: If you want an easy out to a conversation just start jangling your keys or coins in your pocket or hands. It might be a bit rude, but if you’ve really gotta go, this is a great way to end a conversation .

Historic Example: In 1969 when Elvis Presley made his first public stage appearance in 9 years, he displayed signs of fidgeting. What do you think he was feeling, judging by this picture?

Touching Ears

The ear is rubbed, pulled, scratched, touched, picked at, or rubbed vigorously.

What it Means: OK, you might have noticed a trend by now—touching yourself basically means anxiety. Not in all cases, but unless you’ve just got an itch that won’t go away, repetitive self-touch in all forms is a way to ease tension throughout your body.

People generally scratch behind their ears, says Dutch biologist Nikolaas Tinbergen 20 https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2004-16480-000 , as a way to ease tension during stressful situations—such as when you’ve made a public speaking blunder in front of thousands of people.

Effectively, people who touch their ears this may be trying to “block” information that they’ve just heard—whether it’s a prodding question, or even if they’ve been accused.

Example: You may be familiar with the American actress Carol Burnett, who was famous for tugging on her left ear. She did this at the end of each show to let her grandmother know she was doing well and loved her. After her grandmother’s passing, she continued tugging her ear as a tradition and in memory of her beloved grandmother.

Pocketed Hands

Keeping hands in pockets may indicate disinterest or discomfort in revealing one’s thoughts and feelings.

What it Means: Having your hands in your pockets during a conversation generally signals a reserved or closed-off attitude. It might mean you’re uncomfortable, disinterested, or unwilling to engage fully with the other person. This gesture often hampers open communication and can make you appear unapproachable.

The Science: Psychological research 21 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/304151618_Body-Language-Communication_194_Aproprioception_The_IW_case suggests that hand gestures contribute significantly to communication. Therefore, pocketed hands limit this expressive capability, often leading to misinterpretation or a lack of connection during interactions.

How to Use it: If you notice yourself resorting to this stance, it may be helpful to ask yourself: “Am I nervous, uncomfortable, or disengaged?” Likewise, if you observe someone else with pocketed hands, it might be a sign to approach the situation with greater sensitivity.

Example: In many crime dramas, like “Law & Order,” suspects or witnesses often put their hands in their pockets when being questioned, which immediately makes them appear more guarded and less trustworthy to the detectives.

What Are the 11 Types of Body Language?

Besides open and closed, body language can be further broken down into 11 different channels, including facial expressions, body proxemics, and ornaments.

Facial Expressions

Researcher Dr. Paul Ekman discovered 7 universal microexpressions which are short facial gestures every human makes when they feel an intense emotion. We are very drawn to looking at and observing the face to understand someone’s hidden emotions.

Body Proxemics

Proxemics is a term for how our body moves in space. We are constantly looking at how someone is moving—are they gesturing? Leaning? Moving toward or away from us? Body movements tell us a lot about preferences and feelings.

The most common gestures are hand gestures. We often use our hands to express our emotions, tell a story, or comfort ourselves. My team even did an experiment on TED talks and found the most popular speakers also used the most hand gestures.

Clothes, jewelry, sunglasses, and hairstyles are all extensions of our body language. Not only do certain colors and styles send signals to others, how we interact with our ornaments is also telling. Is someone a fidgeter with their watch or ring?

Interest cues can be signs of attraction or general interest that usually don’t involve touch. From obvious cues like winking and smiling, to more subtle ones like a flick of the hair or displaying the wrist, knowing which cues to give and recognizing them is key to building rapport.

Eye movements and changes tell us a lot about others’ intentions. During an interaction, we can often see changes such as longer eye gaze, sideways glances, and blocked eyes. These cues can indicate emotions like attraction, skepticism, or stress.

Pacifying behaviors consist of a wide range of self-soothing behaviors that serve to calm us down after experiencing something unpleasant. This can be seen with fidgeting, bouncing feet, and arm rubbing. As a general rule of thumb, any repetitive behavior is likely pacifying.

Haptics refers to body language cues that involve touch. These include handshakes, touching another’s arm, hugs, a pat on the shoulder, and kissing. Since we interact with the world through touch, we can observe how others touch us to get an insight on their preferences.

Blocking cues are performed to magically “vanish” the cause of people’s stress or anxiety. Like the three wise monkeys—“see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil”—these cues consist of barriers like touching the mouth or crossing the arms to block out the environment.

Paralanguage

Paralanguage is the nonverbal communications of your voice, such as pitch, tone, and cadence. Often, we can hear how confident or anxious one feels by simply listening to their voice. By learning paralanguage, we can even master our own voices and give power to our words.

Emblems, or symbolic cues, represent messages that are consciously understood by others, and are often used in place of words. There are over 800 emblems, from your “OK” sign and “thumbs up,” and they are heavily dependent on a person’s culture and geographic location.

Understanding & Interpreting body language

Body language isn’t just about seeing a body language cue. It’s also about interpretation and knowing what to look for. If you really want to take a deep dive into body language, check out the most advanced book on cues:

In the world of body language, there are 2 camps: Absolutists believe that whenever a body language cue appears, it 100% has the interpreted meaning. For example, if a person crosses their arms, it means they are feeling blocked off in all cases. Contextualists believe that body language depends on the situation. If a person crosses their arms, it could mean that they’re cold, or it’s simply more comfortable for them.

The key to understanding body language is to be a contextualist, not an absolutist. Learning about body language cues without knowing how to apply them may skew your opinions about others for the worse, rather than improving them for the better.

Body Language Mini FAQ

Here are some other questions I’ve been asked about body language, which I’ve compiled into a mini FAQ: 

Yes! Body language cues and their consistency have been scientifically proven time and time again by researchers such as Paul Ekman, Joe Navarro, Barbara and Allan Pease, Desmond Morris, and Carol Kinsey Goman. However, it’s important to note that everyone has their individual quirks that may be different from the norm.

No. While many cues are universal, such as the eyebrow flash and 7 facial microexpressions, many body language cues are specific to a culture or geographic location. For example, many Western cultures prefer a handshake as a greeting; however, some Spanish or Latin cultures may kiss, Thai culture often employs the “wai” greeting, and the Japanese may prefer to bow.

A nonverbal cue is anything that is done nonverbally during an interaction, such as a hand gesture or bodily movement. Many body language cues can be interpreted to reveal a person’s intentions or feelings during a situation.

When there is a mismatch between a person’s words and body language, it is generally preferred to rely on their body language for an accurate interpretation of their true feelings. Most people make a conscious effort to choose their words carefully; however, body language is much harder to consciously control and therefore more reliable in most cases.

Nonverbal communication is the broad term used to describe all types of communication without using words. Body language is a category of nonverbal communication that focuses on all parts of the body, such as facial expressions and gestures.

Absolutely! Many people, especially those who are new to reading body language, will make the mistake of attempting to read body language but get it wrong. They may read a certain body language cue and forget to take into consideration the context or environment. They may also read a cue but miss out on other, more important cues that signal the opposite of their interpretation.

Common body language cues that indicate lying are touching the nose, increased eye contact, licking the lips, uncertain vocal tonality, and a frozen posture. There are many lying cues that may indicate deception. However, there is no single cue that definitively means a person is lying.

It depends. Some people are naturally gifted at reading body language and can pick up on it readily. For others, it may take months in order to get a basic grasp of body language. The amount of time spent observing cues, a person’s perceptiveness, and the amount of training and research one does all affect a person’s body-language-reading abilities.

I hope this article has been useful to you! To continue the guide, please click on the next article link below.  And if you have any other questions about body language, please leave a comment below so I can potentially add it to the mini FAQ!

To your success,

Crack The Code on Facial Expressions

The human face is constantly sending signals, and we use it to understand the person’s intentions when we speak to them. In Decode, we dive deep into these microexpressions to teach you how to instantly pick up on them and understand the meaning behind what is said to you. Don’t spend another day living in the dark.

Side Note: As much as possible we tried to use academic research or expert opinion for this master body language guide. Occasionally, when we could not find research we include anecdotes that are helpful. As more research comes out on nonverbal behavior we will be sure to add it!

• Why Body Language is Important
• Examples and Meanings
• How to Read People
• Presentation Cues
• Interview Cues
• Workplace Cues
• Business Cues
• Aggressive Cues
• Confident Cues
• Condescending Cues
• Presidential Cues
• Resting Bitch Face
• Advertising Cues
• AI and Body Language
• Facial Microexpressions
• Shoulder Cues
• Hand Gestures
• Female Cues
• Rules of Attraction
• How to Flirt

Article sources

Popular guides, 36 thoughts on “23 essential body language examples and their meanings”.

I have to say, while I understand what you said, there are many other reasons why people do things. For example, I have psoriasis. I move because I am itchy, especially in the winter. During these times, we are all stressed! People with ADHD have many body twitches, etc. This article was way too judgmental for me! Let’s get to know people before we judge them by their movements! It is very stressful for some of us to learn new ways of body movements, especially right now with the stress of being online all the time! Thank you!

Great article Vanessa. Very comprehensive. Thanks for sharing your knowledge. I am sure to find it useful.

Informative, organised and entertaining . Really good article! Thank you!

Quite helpful

Hello My name is adel zaedan and I am a Ph.D. student at the University of Baghdad in Iraq. I am trying to conduct research about “body language” and I am looking for a professor who has done research in this area to ask him/her a few questions. Do you or someone that you know have done any work related to this topic? If not, are there any resources that I could use as a reference? Please let me know

Hi Adel, feel free to message [email protected] to take this question further. Thanks! Rob | Science of People Team

very informative.

Have you ever noticed Putin when he walks? He swings his left arm in a very exaggerated way from front to back. Why? When seated and facing someone, he frequently raises one or both feet off the ground except for the heel. What does this mean?

Very informative and so essential in my work as counsellor.

Comments are closed.

How to Deal with Difficult People at Work

Do you have a difficult boss? Colleague? Client? Learn how to transform your difficult relationship. I’ll show you my science-based approach to building a strong, productive relationship with even the most difficult people.

Related Articles

Science of People offers over 1000+ articles on people skills and nonverbal behavior.

Get our latest insights and advice delivered to your inbox.

It’s a privilege to be in your inbox. We promise only to send the good stuff.

Body Language

Microexpressions

Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff

Body language is a silent orchestra, as people constantly give clues to what they’re thinking and feeling. Non-verbal messages including body movements, facial expressions, vocal tone and volume, and other signals are collectively known as body language.

Microexpressions (brief displays of emotion on the face), hand gestures, and posture all register in the human brain almost immediately—even when a person is not consciously aware they have perceived anything. For this reason, body language can strongly color how an individual is perceived, and how he or she, in turn, interprets others’ motivation , mood, and openness . It's natural to mirror; beginning as soon as infancy, a newborn moves its body to the rhythm of the voice he hears.

Body language is a vital form of communication, but most of it happens below the level of conscious awareness. When you wait for a blind date to arrive, for instance, you may nervously tap your foot without even realizing that you’re doing it. Similarly, when you show up to meet your date, you may not consciously perceive that your date appears closed-off, but your unconscious mind may pick up on the crossed arms or averted gaze. Luckily, with knowledge and a little practice, it is possible to exert some measure of control over your own body language and to become more skilled at reading others.

The face is the first place to look , arching eyebrows might indicate an invitation of sorts, and smiling is another indication that the person welcomes you. And is the person standing or sitting close to you? If so, then there is interest. Plus, open arms are just that: Open.

If a person repeatedly touches your arm, places a light hand on your shoulder, or knocks elbows with you, the person is attracted to you and is demonstrating this with increased touch. People interested in each other smile more, and their mouths may even be slightly open. Engaging in eye contact is another indication. A person who leans towards you or mirrors your body language is also demonstrating interest.

A common form of body language is mirroring another person’s gestures and mannerisms; mirroring also includes mimicking another person’s speech patterns and even attitudes. This is a method of building rapport with others.  We learn through imitating others, and it is mostly an unconscious action.

When you want to persuade or influence a person, mirroring can be an effective way to build rapport. Salespeople who use this with prospective clients pay close attention to them and they listen, observe, mimic with positive results.

People who are attracted to one another indeed copy each other’s movements and mannerisms. In fact, many animals mirror as well. That is why cats circle each other, and why chimpanzees stare at each other before intercourse.

If you tilt your head while looking at a baby, the baby relaxes. Why is that? The same applies to couples who are in love, tilting the head exposes the neck, and perhaps shows vulnerability. The person with a tilted head is perceived as more interested, attentive, caring, and having less of an agenda.

Eye blocking , or covering your eyes, expresses emotions such as frustration and worry. And sometimes the eyelids shut to show determination, while sometimes the eyelids flutter to show that you have screwed up and feel embarrassed.

When you’re stressed out, touching or stroking the neck signals a pacifying behavior. We all rub our necks at the back, the sides, and also under the chin. The fleshy area under the chin has nerve endings and stroking it lowers heart rate and calms us.

The hands reveal a lot about a person. When you feel confident, the space between your fingers grows, but that space lessens when you feel insecure. And while rubbing the hands conveys stress, steepling the fingers means that a person feels confident.

In many cultures, a light touch on the arm conveys harmony and trust. In one study, people in the UK, the US, France, and Puerto Rico were observed while sitting at a coffee shop. The British and the Americans hardly touched, and the French and the Puerto Ricans freely touched in togetherness.  

To make others feel comfortable while standing, crossing your legs will show you are interested in what the other person has to say. It also means, “Take your time.” The standing crossed legs will help you say that you are comfortable with the other person.

Fidgety hands mean anxiousness or even boredom and keeping your arms akimbo may telegraph arrogance. Crossing the arms and legs is, no doubt, a closed position. Whereas sitting with open arms invites the other person in. If you are sitting and want to appear neutral, it’s best to hold your hands on your lap, just like the Queen of England.

Shake hands firmly while making eye contact, but do not squeeze the person’s hand—your goal is to make someone feel comfortable , not to assert dominance. It is important to be sensitive to cultural norms: if you receive a weak handshake, it may be that the person comes from a background in which a gentle handshake is the norm.

Most people think that crossed arms are a sign of aggression or refusal to cooperate. In fact, crossed arms can signal many other things, including anxiety, self-restraint, and even interest, if the person crossing their arms is mirroring someone who is doing the same.   

For the most part, yes. All primates demonstrate behaviors including the freeze response and various self-soothing behaviors, such as touching the neck or twirling the hair in humans. We know that many non-verbal behaviors are innate because even blind children engage in them. Still, some behaviors are mysteries. 

In males, wide shoulders and narrow hips are associated with strength and vitality; this is reflected in everything from the form of Greek statues to padded shoulders in men's suit jackets. How one hold's one's shoulders conveys dominance and relative status within a hierarchy. 

Freezing in place, rocking back and forth, and contorting into a fetal position are all known as " reserved behaviors ," as they are used only when a person experiences extreme stress. Facial expressions alone can signal this state, such as pursing or sucking in the lips, often seen when a person is upset or feels contrite. 

As social animals, we evolved to display emotions, thoughts, and intentions, all of which are processed by the brain's limbic system. Because these reactions precede and at times even override conscious deliberation, body language is uniquely capable of revealing how a person feels--but only if another person is schooled in what these gestures indicate. 

Language is constantly changing, and we all use it differently. How can we keep up? Two words: adaptive communication

There are ways to catch our lying public officials.

The science of deceptive nonverbal communication.

When it comes to relaxation, are you trying too hard? Four creative and intuitive ways to cope with stress, worry, and anxiety.

It may depend on the quality of the sex, and if you're sober.

Speaking on the phone can make it easier to talk about difficult subjects and may feel more intimate than even in-person treatment. But there are drawbacks.

Most show signs of stress in hugs; many try to bite.

2. Relying too much on words.

Elephants greet one another with complex, multisensory rituals—and they consider the visual attention of the other elephant when choosing how to communicate.

If we’ve been told as children that we are beautiful or ugly, strong or weak, winners or losers, we carry ourselves accordingly.

• Find a Therapist
• Find a Treatment Center
• Find a Psychiatrist
• Find a Support Group
• Find Online Therapy
• United States
• Brooklyn, NY
• Chicago, IL
• Houston, TX
• Los Angeles, CA
• New York, NY
• Portland, OR
• San Diego, CA
• San Francisco, CA
• Seattle, WA
• Washington, DC
• Asperger's
• Bipolar Disorder
• Chronic Pain
• Eating Disorders
• Passive Aggression
• Personality
• Goal Setting
• Positive Psychology
• Stopping Smoking
• Low Sexual Desire
• Relationships
• Child Development
• Self Tests NEW
• Therapy Center
• Diagnosis Dictionary
• Types of Therapy

Sticking up for yourself is no easy task. But there are concrete skills you can use to hone your assertiveness and advocate for yourself.

• Emotional Intelligence
• Gaslighting
• Affective Forecasting
• Neuroscience

TOPIC SENTENCE/ In his numerous writings, Marx critiques capitalism by identifying its flaws. ANALYSIS OF EVIDENCE/ By critiquing the political economy and capitalism, Marx implores his reader to think critically about their position in society and restores awareness in the proletariat class. EVIDENCE/ To Marx, capitalism is a system characterized by the “exploitation of the many by the few,” in which workers accept the exploitation of their labor and receive only harm of “alienation,” rather than true benefits ( MER 487). He writes that “labour produces for the rich wonderful things – but for the worker it produces privation. It produces palaces—but for the worker, hovels. It produces beauty—but for the worker, deformity” (MER 73). Marx argues capitalism is a system in which the laborer is repeatedly harmed and estranged from himself, his labor, and other people, while the owner of his labor – the capitalist – receives the benefits ( MER 74). And while industry progresses, the worker “sinks deeper and deeper below the conditions of existence of his own class” ( MER 483).  ANALYSIS OF EVIDENCE/ But while Marx critiques the political economy, he does not explicitly say “capitalism is wrong.” Rather, his close examination of the system makes its flaws obvious. Only once the working class realizes the flaws of the system, Marx believes, will they - must they - rise up against their bourgeois masters and achieve the necessary and inevitable communist revolution.

Not every paragraph will be structured exactly like this one, of course. But as you draft your own paragraphs, look for all three of these elements: topic sentence, evidence, and analysis.

• picture_as_pdf Anatomy Of a Body Paragraph

• Search Menu
• Sign in through your institution
• Advance Articles
• Editor's Choice
• Braunwald's Corner
• ESC Guidelines
• EHJ Dialogues
• Issue @ a Glance Podcasts
• CardioPulse
• Weekly Journal Scan
• European Heart Journal Supplements
• Year in Cardiovascular Medicine
• Asia in EHJ
• Most Cited Articles
• ESC Content Collections
• Author Guidelines
• Submission Site
• Why publish with EHJ?
• Open Access Options
• Submit from medRxiv or bioRxiv
• Author Resources
• Self-Archiving Policy
• Read & Publish
• Advertising and Corporate Services
• Advertising
• Reprints and ePrints
• Sponsored Supplements
• Journals Career Network
• About European Heart Journal
• Editorial Board
• About the European Society of Cardiology
• ESC Publications
• War in Ukraine
• ESC Membership
• ESC Journals App
• Developing Countries Initiative
• Dispatch Dates
• Terms and Conditions
• Journals on Oxford Academic
• Books on Oxford Academic

Article Contents

Introduction, the power of non-verbal communication, in academic settings, the role of body language in interviews and evaluations, cultural considerations, the impact of body language on collaboration, declarations.

• < Previous

Unspoken science: exploring the significance of body language in science and academia

• Article contents
• Figures & tables
• Supplementary Data

Mansi Patil, Vishal Patil, Unisha Katre, Unspoken science: exploring the significance of body language in science and academia, European Heart Journal , Volume 45, Issue 4, 21 January 2024, Pages 250–252, https://doi.org/10.1093/eurheartj/ehad598

• Permissions Icon Permissions

Scientific presentations serve as a platform for researchers to share their work and engage with their peers. Science and academia rely heavily on effective communication to share knowledge and foster collaboration. Science and academia are domains deeply rooted in the pursuit of knowledge and the exchange of ideas. While the focus is often on the content of research papers, lectures, and presentations, there is another form of communication that plays a significant role in these fields: body language. Non-verbal cues, such as facial expressions, gestures, posture, and eye contact, can convey a wealth of information, often subtly influencing interpersonal dynamics and the perception of scientific work. In this article, we will delve into the unspoken science of body language, exploring its significance in science and academia. It is essential to emphasize on the importance of body language in scientific and academic settings, highlighting its impact on presentations, interactions, interviews, and collaborations. Additionally, cultural considerations and the implications for cross-cultural communication are explored. By understanding the unspoken science of body language, researchers and academics can enhance their communication skills and promote a more inclusive and productive scientific community.

Communication is a multi-faceted process, and words are only one aspect of it. Research suggests that non-verbal communication constitutes a substantial portion of human interaction, often conveying information that words alone cannot. Body language has a direct impact on how people perceive and interpret scientific ideas and findings. 1 For example, a presenter who maintains confident eye contact, uses purposeful gestures, and exhibits an open posture is likely to be seen as more credible and persuasive compared with someone who fidgets, avoids eye contact, and displays closed-off body language ( Figure 1 ).

Types of non-verbal communications. 2 Non-verbal communication comprises of haptics, gestures, proxemics, facial expressions, paralinguistics, body language, appearance, eye contact, and artefacts.

In academia, body language plays a crucial role in various contexts. During lectures, professors who use engaging body language, such as animated gestures and expressive facial expressions, can captivate their students and enhance the learning experience. Similarly, students who exhibit attentive and respectful body language, such as maintaining eye contact and nodding, signal their interest and engagement in the subject matter. 3

Body language also influences interactions between colleagues and supervisors. For instance, in a laboratory setting, researchers who display confident and open body language are more likely to be perceived as competent and reliable by their peers. Conversely, individuals who exhibit closed-off or defensive body language may inadvertently create an environment that inhibits collaboration and knowledge sharing. The impact of haptics in research collaboration and networking lies in its potential to enhance interpersonal connections and convey emotions, thereby fostering a deeper sense of empathy and engagement among participants.

Interviews and evaluations are critical moments in academic and scientific careers. Body language can significantly impact the outcomes of these processes. Candidates who display confident body language, including good posture, firm handshakes, and appropriate gestures, are more likely to make positive impressions on interviewers or evaluators. Conversely, individuals who exhibit nervousness or closed-off body language may unwittingly convey a lack of confidence or competence, even if their qualifications are strong. Recognizing the power of body language in these situations allows individuals to present themselves more effectively and positively.

Non-verbal cues play a pivotal role during interviews and conferences, where researchers and academics showcase their work. When attending conferences or presenting research, scientists must be aware of their body language to effectively convey their expertise and credibility. Confident body language can inspire confidence in others, making it easier to establish professional connections, garner support for research projects, and secure collaborations.

Similarly, during job interviews, body language can significantly impact the outcome. The facial non-verbal elements of an interviewee in a job interview setting can have a great effect on their chances of being hired. The face as a whole, the eyes, and the mouth are features that are looked at and observed by the interviewer as they makes their judgements on the person’s effective work ability. The more an applicant genuinely smiles and has their eyes’ non-verbal message match their mouth’s non-verbal message, they will be more likely to get hired than those who do not. As proven, that first impression can be made in only milliseconds; thus, it is crucial for an applicant to pass that first test. It paints the road for the rest of the interview process. 4

While body language is a universal form of communication, it is important to recognize that its interpretation can vary across cultures. Different cultures have distinct norms and expectations regarding body language, and what may be seen as confident in one culture may be interpreted differently in another. 5 It is crucial for scientists and academics to be aware of these cultural nuances to foster effective cross-cultural communication and understanding. Awareness of cultural nuances is crucial in fostering effective cross-cultural communication and understanding. Scientists and academics engaged in international collaborations or interactions should familiarize themselves with cultural differences to avoid misunderstandings and promote respectful and inclusive communication.

Collaboration lies at the heart of scientific progress and academic success. Body language plays a significant role in building trust and establishing effective collaboration among researchers and academics. Open and inviting body language, along with active listening skills, can foster an environment where ideas can be freely exchanged, leading to innovative breakthroughs. In research collaboration and networking, proxemics can significantly affect the level of trust and rapport between researchers. Respecting each other’s personal space and maintaining appropriate distances during interactions can foster a more positive and productive working relationship, leading to better communication and idea exchange ( Figure 2 ). Furthermore, being aware of cultural variations in proxemics can help researchers navigate diverse networking contexts, promoting cross-cultural understanding and enabling more fruitful international collaborations.

Overcoming the barrier of communication. The following factors are important for overcoming the barriers in communication, namely, using culturally appropriate language, being observant, assuming positive intentions, avoiding being judgemental, identifying and controlling bias, slowing down responses, emphasizing relationships, seeking help from interpreters, being eager to learn and adapt, and being empathetic.

On the other hand, negative body language, such as crossed arms, lack of eye contact, or dismissive gestures, can signal disinterest or disagreement, hindering collaboration and stifling the flow of ideas. Recognizing and addressing such non-verbal cues can help create a more inclusive and productive scientific community.

Effective communication is paramount in science and academia, where the exchange of ideas and knowledge fuels progress. While the scientific community often focuses on the power of words, it is crucial not to send across conflicting verbal and non-verbal cues. While much attention is given to verbal communication, the significance of non-verbal cues, specifically body language, cannot be overlooked. Body language encompasses facial expressions, gestures, posture, eye contact, and other non-verbal behaviours that convey information beyond words.

Disclosure of Interest

There are no conflicts of interests from all authors.

Baugh AD , Vanderbilt AA , Baugh RF . Communication training is inadequate: the role of deception, non-verbal communication, and cultural proficiency . Med Educ Online 2020 ; 25 : 1820228 . https://doi.org/10.1080/10872981.2020.1820228

Google Scholar

Aralia . 8 Nonverbal Tips for Public Speaking . Aralia Education Technology. https://www.aralia.com/helpful-information/nonverbal-tips-public-speaking/ (22 July 2023, date last accessed)

Danesi M . Nonverbal communication. In: Understanding Nonverbal Communication : Boomsburry Academic , 2022 ; 121 – 162 . https://doi.org/10.5040/9781350152670.ch-001

Google Preview

Cortez R , Marshall D , Yang C , Luong L . First impressions, cultural assimilation, and hireability in job interviews: examining body language and facial expressions’ impact on employer’s perceptions of applicants . Concordia J Commun Res 2017 ; 4 . https://doi.org/10.54416/dgjn3336

Pozzer-Ardenghi L . Nonverbal aspects of communication and interaction and their role in teaching and learning science. In: The World of Science Education . Netherlands : Brill , 2009 , 259 – 271 . https://doi.org/10.1163/9789087907471_019

Email alerts

Citing articles via, looking for your next opportunity, affiliations.

• Online ISSN 1522-9645
• Print ISSN 0195-668X
• Copyright © 2024 European Society of Cardiology
• About Oxford Academic
• Publish journals with us
• University press partners
• What we publish
• New features  
• Open access
• Institutional account management
• Rights and permissions
• Get help with access
• Accessibility
• Media enquiries
• Oxford University Press
• Oxford Languages
• University of Oxford

Oxford University Press is a department of the University of Oxford. It furthers the University's objective of excellence in research, scholarship, and education by publishing worldwide

• Copyright © 2024 Oxford University Press
• Cookie settings
• Cookie policy
• Privacy policy
• Legal notice

This Feature Is Available To Subscribers Only

Sign In or Create an Account

This PDF is available to Subscribers Only

For full access to this pdf, sign in to an existing account, or purchase an annual subscription.

Have a language expert improve your writing

Run a free plagiarism check in 10 minutes, generate accurate citations for free.

• Knowledge Base
• How to write the body of an essay | Drafting & redrafting

How to Write the Body of an Essay | Drafting & Redrafting

Published on November 5, 2014 by Shane Bryson . Revised on July 23, 2023 by Shona McCombes.

The body is the longest part of an essay . This is where you lead the reader through your ideas, elaborating arguments and evidence for your thesis . The body is always divided into paragraphs .

You can work through the body in three main stages:

• Create an  outline of what you want to say and in what order.
• Write a first draft to get your main ideas down on paper.
• Write a second draft to clarify your arguments and make sure everything fits together.

This article gives you some practical tips for how to approach each stage.

Instantly correct all language mistakes in your text

Upload your document to correct all your mistakes in minutes

Table of contents

Start with an outline, write the first draft, write the second draft, other interesting articles.

Before you start, make a rough outline that sketches out the main points you want to make and the order you’ll make them in. This can help you remember how each part of the essay should relate to the other parts.

However, remember that  the outline isn’t set in stone – don’t be afraid to change the organization if necessary. Work on an essay’s structure begins before you start writing, but it continues as you write, and goes on even after you’ve finished writing the first draft.

While you’re writing a certain section, if you come up with an idea for something elsewhere in the essay, take a few moments to add to your outline or make notes on your organizational plans.

Here's why students love Scribbr's proofreading services

Discover proofreading & editing

Your goals in the first draft are to turn your rough ideas into workable arguments, add detail to those arguments, and get a sense of what the final product will actually look like.

Write strong body paragraphs

Start wherever you want

Many writers do not begin writing at the introduction , or even the early body paragraphs. Start writing your essay where it seems most natural for you to do so.

Some writers might prefer to start with the easiest section to write, while others prefer to get the most difficult section out of the way first. Think about what material you need to clarify for yourself, and consider beginning there.

Tackle one idea at a time

Each paragraph should aim to focus on one central idea, giving evidence, explanation, and arguments that relate to that idea.

At the start of each paragraph, write a topic sentence that expresses the main point. Then elaborate and expand on the topic sentence in the rest of the paragraph.

When you’ve said everything you have to say about the idea, move onto a new paragraph.

Keep your argument flexible

You may realize as you write that some of your ideas don’t work as well as you thought they would. Don’t give up on them too easily, but be prepared to change or abandon sections if you realize they don’t make sense.

You’ll probably also come up with new ideas that you’d not yet thought of when writing the outline. Note these ideas down and incorporate them into the essay if there’s a logical place for them.

If you’re stuck on one section, move on to another part of the essay and come back to it later.

Don’t delete content

If you begin to dislike a certain section or even the whole essay, don’t scrap it in fit of rage!

If something really isn’t working, you can paste it into a separate document, but keep what you have, even if you don’t plan on using it. You may find that it contains or inspires new ideas that you can use later.

Note your sources

Students often make work for themselves by forgetting to keep track of sources when writing drafts.

You can save yourself a lot of time later and ensure you avoid plagiarism by noting down the name, year, and page number every time you quote or paraphrase from a source.

You can also use a citation generator to save a list of your sources and copy-and-paste citations when you need them.

Avoid perfectionism

When you’re writing a first draft, it’s important not to get slowed down by small details. Get your ideas down on paper now and perfect them later. If you’re unsatisfied with a word, sentence, or argument, flag it in the draft and revisit it later.

When you finish the first draft, you will know which sections and paragraphs work and which might need to be changed. It doesn’t make sense to spend time polishing something you might later cut out or revise.

Working on the second draft means assessing what you’ve got and rewriting it when necessary. You’ll likely end up cutting some parts of the essay and adding new ones.

Check your ideas against your thesis

Everything you write should be driven by your thesis . Looking at each piece of information or argumentation, ask yourself:

• Does the reader need to know this in order to understand or accept my thesis?
• Does this give evidence for my thesis?
• Does this explain the reasoning behind my thesis?
• Does this show something about the consequences or importance of my thesis?

If you can’t answer yes to any of these questions, reconsider whether it’s relevant enough to include.

If your essay has gone in a different direction than you originally planned, you might have to rework your thesis statement to more accurately reflect the argument you’ve made.

Watch out for weak points

Be critical of your arguments, and identify any potential weak points:

• Unjustified assumptions: Can you be confident that your reader shares or will accept your assumptions, or do they need to be spelled out?
• Lack of evidence:  Do you make claims without backing them up?
• Logical inconsistencies:  Do any of your points contradict each other?
• Uncertainty: Are there points where you’re unsure about your own claims or where you don’t sound confident in what you’re saying?

Fixing these issues might require some more research to clarify your position and give convincing evidence for it.

Check the organization

When you’re happy with all the main parts of your essay, take another look at the overall shape of it. You want to make sure that everything proceeds in a logical order without unnecessary repetition.

Try listing only the topic sentence of each paragraph and reading them in order. Are any of the topic sentences too similar? Each paragraph should discuss something different; if two paragraphs are about the same topic, they must approach it in different ways, and these differences should be made clear in the topic sentences.

Does the order of information make sense? Looking at only topic sentences lets you see at a glance the route your paper takes from start to finish, allowing you to spot organizational errors more easily.

Draw clear connections between your ideas

Finally, you should assess how your ideas fit together both within and between paragraphs. The connections might be clear to you, but you need to make sure they’ll also be clear to your reader.

Within each paragraph, does each sentence follow logically from the one before it? If not, you might need to add new sentences to make the connections clear. Try using transition words to clarify what you want to say.

Between one paragraph and the next, is it clear how your points relate to one another? If you are moving onto an entirely new topic, consider starting the paragraph with a transition sentence that moves from the previous topic and shows how it relates to the new one.

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

• Ad hominem fallacy
• Post hoc fallacy
• Appeal to authority fallacy
• False cause fallacy
• Sunk cost fallacy

College essays

• Choosing Essay Topic
• Write a College Essay
• Write a Diversity Essay
• College Essay Format & Structure
• Comparing and Contrasting in an Essay

 (AI) Tools

• Grammar Checker
• Paraphrasing Tool
• Text Summarizer
• AI Detector
• Plagiarism Checker
• Citation Generator

Cite this Scribbr article

If you want to cite this source, you can copy and paste the citation or click the “Cite this Scribbr article” button to automatically add the citation to our free Citation Generator.

Bryson, S. (2023, July 23). How to Write the Body of an Essay | Drafting & Redrafting. Scribbr. Retrieved July 15, 2024, from https://www.scribbr.com/academic-essay/body/

Is this article helpful?

Shane Bryson

Shane finished his master's degree in English literature in 2013 and has been working as a writing tutor and editor since 2009. He began proofreading and editing essays with Scribbr in early summer, 2014.

Other students also liked

How to write an essay introduction | 4 steps & examples, academic paragraph structure | step-by-step guide & examples, how to conclude an essay | interactive example, "i thought ai proofreading was useless but..".

I've been using Scribbr for years now and I know it's a service that won't disappoint. It does a good job spotting mistakes”

Sign in to access Harper’s Magazine

We've recently updated our website to make signing in easier and more secure

Hi there . You have 1 free article this month. Connect to your subscription or subscribe for full access

You've reached your free article limit for this month. connect to your subscription or subscribe for full access, thanks for being a subscriber, body language.

I am eight years old, sitting in my childhood kitchen, ready to watch one of the home videos my father has made. The videotape still exists somewhere, so somewhere she still is, that girl on the screen: hair that tangles, freckles across her nose that in time will spread across one side of her forehead. A body that can throw a baseball the way her father has shown her. A body in which bones and hormones lie in wait, ready to bloom into the wide hips her mother has given her. A body that has scars: the scars over her lungs and heart from the scalpel that saved her when she was a baby, the invisible scars left by a man who touched her when she was young. A body is a record or a body is freedom or a body is a battleground. Already, at eight, she knows it to be all three.

But somebody has slipped. The school is putting on the musical South Pacific, and there are not enough roles for the girls, and she is as tall as or taller than the boys, and so they have done what is unthinkable in this striving 1980s town, in this place where the men do the driving and the women make their mouths into perfect Os to apply lipstick in the rearview. For the musical, they have made her a boy.

No, she thinks. They have allowed her to be a boy.

Photograph by Annie Flanagan of Linden Crawford, from their collaboration All in One Piece © The artist

What I remember is the flush I feel as my father loads the tape into the player. Usually I hate watching videos of myself. Usually there is this stranger on the screen, this girl with her pastel clothing, and I am supposed to pretend that she is me. And she is, I know she is, but also she isn’t. In the third grade I’ll be asked to draw a self-portrait in art class, and for years into the future, when I try to understand when this feeling began—this feeling of not having words to explain what my body is, to explain who I am—I’ll remember my shock as I placed my drawing next to my classmates’. They’d drawn stick figures with round heads and blond curls or crew cuts; they’d drawn their families and their dogs and the bright yellow spikes of a sun. One had drawn long hair and the triangle shape of a dress, and another short hair and jeans. How had they so easily known what they looked like?

I had drawn a swirl.

Now, in the kitchen, what I notice is that my siblings are squirming in their seats, asking if they can leave—and that I, somehow, am not. I am sitting perfectly still. Is it possible that I want to see this video? The feeling is peculiar. I have not yet known the pleasure of taking something intimately mine and watching the world respond. Someday, I will be a writer. Someday, I will love this feeling. But at eight years old, my private world both pains and sustains me, and sharing it is new.

My mother hushes my siblings and passes popcorn around the table. My father takes his spot at the head. Onscreen, the auditorium of an elementary school appears. At the corner of the stage, there are painted plywood palm trees.

Then the curtains part, and there I am. My hair slicked back, my ponytail pinned away, a white sailor’s cap perched on my head. Without the hair, my face looks different: angular, fine-boned. I am wearing a plain white T-shirt tucked into blue jeans, all the frill and fluff of my normal clothing stripped away—and with it, somehow, so much else. All my life, I have felt ungainly—wrong-sized and wrong-shaped.

But look. On the screen. There is only ease.

I don’t know whether the hush I remember spread through the kitchen or only through me. My mother is the first to speak. “You make a good-looking boy!” she says.

I feel the words I’m not brave enough to say. I know.

S oon after, I began to ignore the long hair that marked me so firmly as a girl, leaving it in the same ponytail for days on end, until it knotted into a solid, dark mass. All my friends were boys, and my dearest hours were spent playing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the lawn with my twin brother and the neighbor boy. My room was blue, and my teddy bear was blue, and the turtle I wanted to be was Leonardo, not only because he was smart but because his color was blue. When my twin brother got something I didn’t—to go to the baseball game, though we were all fans; to camp with the Boy Scouts while my sisters and I were shuttled off to the ballet; to keep the porn mags I discovered in his bedroom—and the reason given was that he was a boy, rage choked me with tears. That was grief, I think now, the grief of being misunderstood.

One afternoon, when my brother yet again went shirtless for a game of catch and I wasn’t allowed to, I announced to my father that I didn’t want to be a girl, not if being a girl meant I had to wear a shirt. My father went to get my mother. They whispered together, then my mother explained that I should be happy to be a girl—there were so many good things about it. I knew there were; that wasn’t the problem. The problem was that people kept calling me one. I remember realizing I couldn’t explain this to her.

Back then, in 1985, the word genderqueer —how I now identify, the language that would eventually help me see myself—hadn’t yet been invented. The term wouldn’t come into existence for another decade, nor would nonbinary, which first appeared in an online forum: “Do you ever really feel as if you’ve moved from that nonbinary existence as a transsexual into a real man or woman?” Note the way nonbinary was positioned from its inception as transitory, as a passing through. It could not itself be a destination, the end to a story. As the scholar Jay Prosser has written, “transsexuality is always narrative work, a transformation of the body that requires the remolding of the life into a particular narrative shape.” It is the narrative constructed in retrospect—perhaps even more than the body—that makes the self recognizable, even cognizable. But narrative requires language. What word was there for me then that could have conveyed the wrongness of everything?

So I said nothing. In middle school I looked up and realized that everyone had chosen sides. The girls suddenly wore makeup and sparkles. The boys no longer played with them. Not choosing sides meant everyone would see that you were other. By then I already felt so other I couldn’t bear it. And so the years of frosted pink and purple eye shadow began, and the earrings I bought in packs at Kmart, my favorite a pair of tiny turquoise dangling airplanes. In girl or boy or neither form, I have always been a fan of excess.

At eighteen, I admitted to myself that it was the girls who caught my eye, not the boys. Terrified, I kept this, too, a secret, and kept dating boys until, at twenty-eight, I met a woman who pursued me. In her, I chose—as I would keep choosing—the sort of woman who made me feel safe. They wore long earrings like I did; sometimes we traded glitter eye shadow, and when we went to bars together we were at once highly visible and utterly invisible. Men asked if we were sisters. They bought us drinks.

All of this felt like fakery even as I lived it, my life arranged into a role like those in the plays I did throughout high school. To live that way—to make your life suit a prearranged story, a gender—was possible.

Until abruptly it wasn’t. I was in graduate school when this changed, dating a woman who identified as butch and looked so much like a boy that the first time I went to meet her at a bar, I walked right by her on the street. When I stood with her I was always read as the feminine one; I was always safe; nobody knew my secret. I told my graduate school I was taking a leave of absence, moving to New Orleans to research a murder that I would eventually write a book about. I told no one that this was a lie; I already had the research I needed. I moved to figure out something I could not articulate even to myself, but that on some quiet level I had been wondering about since I was eight. My body did not feel like mine. My life did not feel like mine. Was there a self that wouldn’t feel like a costume?

Christine Jorgensen, 1953 © Tom Gallagher/New York Daily News Archive/Getty Images

I don’t know when I first learned of Christine Jorgensen, only that even decades after her gender-confirmation surgery, she was still my first image of what transgenderism, and transition, looked like. In the footage of her returning home to the United States from Denmark after her operation, in 1953, she steps off the plane in a thick, high-necked coat, her hair pinned up and curled just so beneath her hat, her heels smart and her stride strong. Once, she was a G.I., but now she stands flanked by uniformed officers, and no one would ever mistake her for one of them. She is a lady.

In front of a tall microphone, cameras flash. Her eyes are wide, searching. “I’m very impressed by everyone coming,” she says. But she doesn’t quite look impressed. She looks stunned. She turns her head left to right. Presumably it’s the cameras she’s looking at, the size of the crowd that has come to see her. But she also seems like she’s taking in the strength of the gender line she’s just crossed. Will there be a movie deal? a reporter wants to know. Perhaps the theater? What will Jorgensen do with her new body, her new notoriety?

“I thank you all for coming,” she says. “But I think it’s too much.”

Some fifty thousand words from the major wire services followed. The size of the hunger that greeted her showed how shocking her trespass was. “How does a child tell its parents such a story as this?” she mused in a letter from the time. To be born and considered one sex. To return home another.

After her, children did tell their parents stories like this, and slowly, painfully, a narrative spread, one that situated the transgender person as “trapped” in the wrong body—a confinement that could only be relieved by transforming into the other sex, the true self. By the Sixties, what was then called transsexuality was widely recognized. On November 21, 1966, a front-page article in the New York  Times announced that Johns Hopkins was now performing sex-change surgeries at its new Gender Identity Clinic. By 1975, a nationally syndicated advice columnist was writing that a transsexual person “has the soma (body) of one sex and the psyche (mind) of another.” The goal of a sex-change operation was to make the two align, thus making possible the “ultimate goal” of the transsexual person—which, the columnist reassured his readers, “is to marry. This provides psychic confirmation that the change to the new sex has been complete.” In 2011, Janet Mock told Marie Claire that when she had had to live as a man, she “had lived with the sheer torment of inhabiting a body that never matched who I was inside, the one devastated by the quirk of fate that consigned me to a life of masked misery.” It was only once she’d crossed over fully—when she could finally live openly as a woman—that she could imagine a future. “No more dress-up,” she said. “No more pretending.”

I n New Orleans, I stop pretending. The Boston girl who looks like a boy comes to visit me in the small apartment I have taken in the Irish Channel. I love the pink light over the streets each evening, the night-blooming jasmine scenting the air, even the splashed beer of the revelers from the bars on the corner. When I sit on my stoop reading at sunset a man rides by on a bicycle wearing a silver tin-man suit, a red felt heart pinned over his chest. As he passes, he doffs his oilcan hat. I raise my glass of wine. In the French Quarter I have seen trapeze artists in bars; I have seen goths dressed in their vampire black. In this city you can be anything you want to be.

Maybe this is what makes me brave. One night she and I are dressing to go out, her in men’s jeans and a long-sleeve T-shirt and me in a short black dress with puffy sleeves that I pair with cowboy boots. I have fixed my hair into pigtails even though I am thirty, going for some image of girlhood, emphasizing the difference between us. Flirting. I lift a silver flask to my lips for a swig of whiskey, and she snaps a photo of me right then. Looking at that photo now is like looking at the moment before.

“Can I try on your jeans?” I ask. The jeans with the button fly and the loose fit. Jeans like I have never before put on my body, afraid of how I might feel in them.

Does she flinch? I am too nervous to notice. She looks at me, long and steady, and says, “Sure.”

Then she snaps what is still the happiest photo of myself I have ever seen.

My memory is that when she lowers the camera this time, her face is grim. “We’re going to break up.”

I hardly hear her; I am peacocking around the apartment. Grinning giddily, turning this way and that in front of the mirror I usually avoid. This rightness, my God. It’s possible to feel this way?

“We’re going to break up,” she says again.

I tuck my smile away like folding up an outfit. “Why?”

She gestures from the jeans—her jeans—to my face. “Look at you. You’re not going to be happy as a femme anymore.”

“I’m butch. I need to be with a femme. Besides,” I remember her sighing. “You’re going to start dating femmes, I know it. Two butches together wouldn’t be right. It would be like two femmes. That doesn’t make sense. The masculine and the feminine together, that’s how it should be.”

Soon I am alone again with my dog in the New Orleans apartment, and a pair of jeans I bought from the men’s department of Target without even trying them on. The fly comes up well past my belly button, the crotch sags, they fit atrociously—they are instantly my favorite thing I have ever owned. I buy a pack of men’s white ribbed tank tops and a pair of Converse with skulls on them, and I start dating a girl who wears flared skirts in all kinds of weather. I open all the doors and order all the beer and when we fuck I am only ever on top and I am only ever inside of her.

And I’m happy, sort of, except for the way that playing a butch role feels like performance, too.

So it is in New Orleans that I first type “ ftm,” female to male, into Google, late one sleepless night, comforted by the blue light of my laptop and my dog snoring at my feet. Once I begin, the words I have never dared think before come in a torrent. I still can’t say them aloud, but I can type them at night when no one is looking. Transgender. Testosterone. Transition.

Lying on my back, a steady pour of whiskey at my side, I study the photographs that follow. The chests rendered flat with the scars from top surgery. The biceps and traps swollen with new hormones. The constructed dicks of bottom surgery—not a choice all, or even most, F.T.M. people make, but an option, the remolding of a body. The remolding of a life. I watch the footage of Christine Jorgensen over and over. Is this rebirth what I want? Is this what will finally make my life, and my body, my own?

Photographs by Rana Young from The Rug’s Topography, published in January by Kris Graves Projects © The artist

I n the years that followed, I argued with myself over whether I felt trapped enough to truly be trans. Some days I would decide yes, and that I’d make the necessary changes to be recognized as a man as soon as I felt brave enough. Other days I would decide no—never because I didn’t feel trapped, but because I wasn’t sure being seen as a man was what would save me. It wasn’t that man felt right; it was that woman felt wrong, and what could be the alternative?

Four years of late-night googling passed before I could say any of this aloud. When I finally did, it was to a lover, a woman I’d fallen for the instant I’d seen her sitting in a crowd at a reading, her hair long and curly (like mine), her jacket black leather (like mine), her shoulders broad and tough as mine had never been. She was unabashedly she : hips that swung from side to side when she walked, lips plump and swollen, a lilting accent in her voice that drove me mad. On our first date she showed up in a tie, and I was so flustered and surprised I could scarcely speak all night. Wasn’t I supposed to wear the tie? I don’t think I said that. I hope I didn’t say that. But she must have sensed something, because for the years we were together, she never again wore one. Instead she donned the stilettos, the fishnet stockings, once a dress so tight, that rode so high under the curve of her ass, that I nearly followed her around the family party we were attending with a jacket. After we fought so badly we broke up, I found I could not stop thinking about her ass, her lips, the way when she straddled me in bed her hair swung in my face. The visions lasted for months, a haunting. Finally I sent a note unsigned in the mail—no name, just words of want. We met at a motel and still we didn’t speak. Just the white sheets, her breasts I’d missed so much, the black confection of string, knotted into the shape of a flower, that revealed itself when I pulled off her clothes. We fucked until we were sweaty and the sheets were sweaty and everything smelled like I was home again.

Maybe that’s what made me brave again. “I’m not. . . ,” I whispered, my fingers curled in her hair, my lips to the sweat of her neck. “I don’t feel like . . . I’ve never felt like. . . ,” and then finally, “I don’t think I’m a woman.”

And her, bless her, what did she do? She told me she knew, from the way she felt me swell under her tongue. She told me she could tell from how hard I got and how much I swelled. I didn’t have the body of a woman, she said. She’d known it all along.

Perhaps her response now sounds reductive, essentialist in the way she read identity in the contours of my body. But that’s not how her words felt. They liberated me. She was saying that biology need not be assumed as cold, incontrovertible fact that had nothing to do with behavior or want. Rather it, too, could be conceptually constructed, seen as reflective proof of who a person was. The body rewritten with the pen of identity. As the cultural historian Thomas Laqueur points out, the body is always interpreted. “The body itself does not produce two sexes,” he writes, let alone two genders. We created these categories. We named them. We drew—we draw—the lines that define them.

Until the late eighteenth century, only men were conceived of as a full gender. Women were understood as not-men rather than a category unto themselves—defined through difference, through lack. This extended even to the body: the ovaries understood as not-quite testes, with no name of their own; the vaginal canal understood as the inverted and undescended sheath of the penis. Laqueur argues that the telling of sex in Genesis—Adam creating Eve from his rib—need not have led to an understanding of a different category in the cultural imagination, only a difference of degree. What wasn’t quite a man was a woman.

If someone with female-looking genitalia behaved in a way that was more like a man—if she had the assurance understood to be the domain of men, if she wished to have a profession, like the writer George Sand or the artist Rosa Bonheur, if she wore trousers and seduced women—she was thought to be an androgyne or hermaphrodite. Her genitalia might look the same when examined by a doctor (as they often were and, one imagines, horribly), but the explanation then was that medicine itself just couldn’t yet see the difference. Her behavior was an amalgamation; her body therefore must be as well. Behavior, how one wished to live—the story began from this origin. Desire mapped itself onto the body.

I don’t ever want to deny the oppression and policing of that period. Yet the privileging of desire, of behavior, reminds me of the freedom I felt from that past lover’s response. After that night in the motel, we invented language of our own, stories spun from our bodies in bed. Neither of us had yet heard the term nonbinary, nor the term genderqueer. Our understanding of what trans meant was still beholden to the binary, and so neither of us could say, then, whether I was trans. Only that I didn’t feel like a woman. So I wasn’t one. She said my body was different, and I believe that, to her, under her touch, it was. In time, hormones would do the work of her tongue. In time, hair clippers and binders would do the work of her gaze. But back then it was her.

What she saw helped me see myself.

T hree years ago, I went to get my headshot taken. I chose the photographer carefully. She takes conservative photos. When she asked whether I wanted makeup and hair, I said yes. I brought two ties to the photoshoot but then agreed to only a single photo in which I was wearing one. My hair was long then, and the stylist straightened it with a blow-dryer and a brush, and then individually re-curled each curl with a wand. The makeup artist applied lip pencil as close to my lip color as he could find. I became a facsimile of myself. I looked older. I looked harder. I looked for all the world like a true-crime writer from New Jersey, which is, I suppose, one version I could tell of my life.

The photograph that resulted appears on the jacket of my first book, which is a memoir. The name on that book is a name I don’t use anymore. The portrait is of me; it is deeply not me. The French psychologist and philosopher Jacques Lacan posited that it is in a child’s infancy that, upon encountering a reflection of themselves in a mirror or window, they are introduced to apperception, the idea that they themselves are not only a self but an object that is viewed and interpreted by others. In a way, the moment of recognition in the mirror is also a moment of splintering: from the private self to the self that is apprehensible to the other. This moment of alienation never resolves. There instead develops a state of subjectivity, a mediation by the outside world, an awareness of being perceived.

“Even in my own mind, I have erased myself,” the writer LaTanya McQueen muses, thinking of the times she has picked up a piece of fiction and begun to read it, and assumed all the while that the characters are white, when she herself identifies as mixed race. What does it mean not to exist in your own imagination? And what does it mean to live like that for so long that you assume it is the only way?

The headshot is a very expensive thing I will never use again. A very expensive monument to my last attempt to conform to a binary that never suited me. A monument to a change that took a long time to come and then arrived very swiftly and that I do not think will ever change back. When a dear friend who has known me only in the after—the way I look now—first saw the picture, they were silent a long time, so long that I thought they must be half-asleep or stoned or something. What was going on? The moment became awkward.

Then, finally, they laughed. “I’m sorry,” they said. “It’s just that I can see you’re in there somewhere, in that person, but. . . ” Then they laughed again.

What the photograph really is is a portrait of limited risk. I was trusting you, reader, with one story of my life. I was not ready to be open about another.

“Lachlan,” by Jenny Papalexandris, from Five Bells: Being LGBT in Australia, published by the New Press © The artist

L ast March, I finally cut off my hair. I was in Sydney, on the other side of the world, and I made an appointment with a stylist whose cuts I’d seen on Instagram. I walked in and asked her to shear the curly hair that was well past my shoulders. Use the clippers, I said. For the first time in my life, I felt the buzz against my scalp. Afterward, I suppose I was in shock. I nearly cried. As I walked the streets, unsure where I was going or where I should go—unsure, it felt like, of this body I had found myself in—I passed a men’s clothing store whose window displays I’d admired days before. I went in. I left several hours later, holding two bags that contained nearly a month’s salary worth of clothing, neatly folded, suddenly loving the way everything looked on me. I wore some of that clothing on the plane home, twenty-two hours in a button-down shirt and stiff blazer. On two different continents, airport security called me “sir,” and then, seeing something in me on a second glance, “I’m sorry, ma’am.” I did not correct them either way. At home, I introduced myself to new people as “Alex” and asked them to use the gender-neutral pronouns they/them. I did not mention this to people who had known me for years, nor correct them when they called me Alexandria. My driver’s license had expired, so I went to the D.M.V. Waiting for my ticket number to be called, I snapped a photograph of my expired license, of the woman of ten years ago with her long, curly hair and her wide grin, her shirt falling off one shoulder to expose a bra strap, her dangling earrings. That woman would move to New Orleans one week later. Sitting in the D.M.V., I took a selfie: the skin of my scalp under the fade, my shirt buttoned to the collar, unsmiling. I posted it to Instagram together with the license. “Gender is a social construct,” the caption read.

At some point I realized that I didn’t and don’t believe in narrow rules of what counts as trans, and I don’t want to transition to a binary place where I would be perceived as male. For so long I thought that was the only other option, and then I was stuck, because that idea didn’t feel right, either. The only time I am ever emotionally attached to my breasts is when I imagine someone taking a knife to them. Yet binders leave me headachy, unable to breathe. I would love to change the countless small facial signifiers that lead people to sort me as female, yet doctors caution that it’s impossible to predict how the body will respond to even low doses of testosterone. It took me eleven years to decide to take that risk. Now I watch as my body slowly changes, monitoring, looking for the right point. I don’t want to pass as a man any more than I want to pass as a woman. I don’t want to be perceived as either. Because I am not either. I want to be seen.

I am far from the only queer person to have been liberated by a loosening of the binary. Janet Mock later disavowed the 2011 Marie Claire piece that described her as trapped, saying that she now understands her experience as more fluid than that. In March, the singer Sam Smith came out as nonbinary and cited a string of other celebrities whose visible examples had allowed Smith to envision a narrative for themself. Mattel recently released its first gender-neutral doll, citing the need for gender-nonconforming children to see themselves represented. Queer identities are a daisy chain of becoming, a passing-on of possibility.

I have come to think of the questions that followed my own becoming in terms of the number of drinks required for people to ask them. There are the one-drink questions, like, “So, do you prefer ‘Alex’ now? For everything?” or even, “Are you trans? Is this the beginning of a transition?” And then there are the questions that arrive only after a friend has embraced me, has sat across from me in a warm-wooded bar, has ordered one drink and then another. “I feel comfortable with you,” they sometimes begin, and smile at me or reach a hand across the table for a squeeze, affirming our intimacy. The words that come next never feel spontaneous, somehow, but mannered, as though they have been sitting just beneath the surface and are not for me, or not only for me, but for the changing times and language we live in.

“Because I feel comfortable with you, I trust I can ask you this. I haven’t had anyone to ask.” They sip. “I know I’m supposed to use gender-neutral pronouns for you now. But I’ve known you as a woman for such a long time. Am I really supposed to think of you differently now?” And then a moment later, after, perhaps, more steadying alcohol. “I mean, what am I supposed to think of you as ?”

This is a risky political moment to identify as trans while questioning the universality of the narratives that have dominated the public imagination of transgenderism. In many parts of the country—more than ever before—binary trans people are finally recognized, able to tell a story of who they are, able to be seen. But under what the National Center for Transgender Equality rightly calls “the discrimination administration,” trans people are under unprecedented and terrifying attack: re-banned from serving in the armed forces and no longer necessarily eligible for health-care coverage, mental-health counseling groups, or admission to homeless shelters. Soon, the Supreme Court will decide whether people can be fired from their jobs just for being trans. This isn’t merely a rollback of civil-rights protections. It’s a war, an attempt to legislate a group of people out of existence by making it too precarious for them to live. Trans people, particularly trans women of color, already face high rates of violence: Hali Marlowe, shot to death on September 20 in Houston, Texas, was at least the nineteenth trans woman murdered just this year.

Under these circumstances, it’s difficult to say that the categories that have helped so many people be seen and see themselves—categories that are now threatened, that must be defended as legitimate—might still be too restrictive for some, like me. To ask not just for protections for those for whom the gender binary feels true, but also for those of us who have had to find language that transcends it. To ask for, and claim, language of our own.

That language takes time. Recently a new acquaintance stopped me in a stairwell. “You had more hair when we met,” he said. His tone was friendly, but I was immediately wary. I didn’t just have less hair. I dressed differently. I went by a different first name. I used different pronouns and had asked my workplace, my insurance, and my landlord to recognize that. Soon, I knew, I would start to look subtly different, the hormones doing their work. I understood the subtext, what he might really be asking. “When did you decide to cut it?”

How could I answer? What few words would convey the complexity of a life? I had decided with every step away from the binary, every step toward being comfortable with myself. We’ve never had a narrative for who I am, but I am trying now, trying with language, trying to tell this story in a way I and others can understand, a way that figures the middle as the destination. I thought back to the child I was, the one who knew that girl didn’t quite fit, who liked the look of boy and couldn’t yet know that that wouldn’t quite fit either, the child who didn’t have the language and would need to write and live and feel a way into it, wait for society to invent the very words that would allow them to be seen.

All I said was, “When I was eight.”

 is an assistant professor of English at Bowdoin College and the author of the book The Fact of a Body: A Murder & a Memoir .

More from Alex Marzano-Lesnevich

More than the right word: on telling a genderqueer narrative

“An unexpectedly excellent magazine that stands out amid a homogenized media landscape.” —the New York Times

Essay on Importance Of Body Language

Students are often asked to write an essay on Importance Of Body Language in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Importance Of Body Language

Understanding body language.

Body language is the way we move, stand, and look, which tells others what we feel without talking. It’s like a secret code that can show happiness, anger, or worry. When we meet someone, their body language gives us clues about how they feel about us.

Body Language in Communication

When we talk, our words are important, but our body language is too. If our words and body language match, our message is strong. If they don’t match, people might get confused about what we really mean.

Body Language in Making Friends

Body language helps in making friends. A smile or open arms can make others feel welcome. When we show we are listening by nodding, people like talking to us more.

Body Language in Learning

In school, body language is key. Teachers can tell if we understand by our faces. When we look interested, it shows we are ready to learn. This way, teachers can help us better.

250 Words Essay on Importance Of Body Language

What is body language, sharing feelings without words.

Imagine you are at a new school and you see a student with a big smile. You know they are happy and friendly, even if they don’t say hello. This is because their smile is a part of body language. It is a silent signal that can share feelings clearly and quickly.

Helps in Understanding Others

Body language is important because it helps us understand how others feel. For example, if your friend has their arms crossed and is looking away, they might be upset or not interested in talking. By noticing these signs, you can know if it’s a good time to talk or better to wait.

Important in Making Friends

When you meet someone new, how you stand and look at them can make a big difference. Standing tall with a friendly face can make others feel comfortable. This can help you make friends easily because they see you as kind and open.

In conclusion, body language is a key part of how we communicate. It helps us show our feelings, understand others, and make friends. Paying attention to body language is just as important as the words we use.

500 Words Essay on Importance Of Body Language

Body language is the way we communicate without using words. It’s about how we move our bodies, our faces, and even how close we stand to other people. Imagine you are talking to your friend and they are smiling, nodding, and looking at you. You would feel that they are listening and happy to be with you. That’s body language!

Why Body Language Matters

Body language in daily life.

Every day, whether you are at school, at home, or playing with friends, you use body language. When you give your friend a thumbs-up, you are telling them “Good job!” without speaking. Teachers use body language too. When they look at the clock and then at the class, they are saying it’s time to stop talking and pay attention, all without saying a word.

Body Language and Making Friends

Making new friends can be easier when you use good body language. Smiling, making eye contact, and having an open posture makes you look friendly and someone others would like to talk to. If you look at the ground and have your arms crossed, people might think you don’t want to make friends, even if you do.

Body Language at School

Understanding others.

Just like you use body language, so does everyone else. If you can understand other people’s body language, you can be a better friend. You can tell if your friend is sad or happy, or if they need help, just by looking at how they act.

Body Language in Different Cultures

Body language can mean different things in different places. For example, a thumbs-up might be good in one country but not nice in another. It’s important to learn about body language from other cultures so you can be respectful and understand people from all over the world.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

Apart from these, you can look at all the essays by clicking here .

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.