goal statement essay examples

50 Inspiring Examples of Career Goal Statements

By Status.net Editorial Team on February 7, 2024 — 12 minutes to read

A career goal statement is a clear and concise description of your professional aspirations: it outlines what you aim to achieve in your career path, providing direction and serving as a guide for your professional decisions. Crafting this statement requires self-reflection to identify what truly matters to you in your career.

Think of your career goal statement as a compass. It helps you navigate through opportunities and choices, aligning them with your long-term objectives. A well-defined goal statement includes specific job titles or roles, industry preferences, skills you want to acquire or use, and the values that matter to you in a work environment.

For example, your statement might be, “I aim to become a Senior Software Developer at a tech company that values innovation, in the next five years.” This statement is direct, time-bound, and reflects personal and professional values.

When writing your own career goal statement, start by asking yourself some questions:

• What am I passionate about?
• Where do I see myself in five, ten, or fifteen years?
• What skills do I need to develop to reach my goals?

Your statement can evolve as your career advances and your goals change. Remember, it’s a living document meant to grow along with you. Keep it precise, make it inspiring for yourself, and let it reflect who you are and who you want to become professionally. By doing so, you’ll create a powerful tool to steer your career decisions and help achieve your ambitions.

Components of a Strong Career Goal Statement

A strong career goal statement effectively communicates where you see yourself in the future and how you plan to get there. The keys to crafting this include clarity in your aspirations and how your current path aligns with your long-term objectives.

Clarity and Specificity

Your career goal statement should clearly articulate the position you’re aiming for and the steps you plan to take to achieve it. For example, instead of saying “I want to grow in the tech industry,” specify “My goal is to become a Senior Software Engineer at a renowned tech firm within the next five years by honing my skills in mobile applications development and leadership.”

Alignment with Career Objectives

Ensure that your statement aligns with your broader career objectives. For instance, if you’re determined to enter the field of environmental sustainability, your goal statement could specify, “I will secure a role as a Sustainability Project Manager by gaining expertise in renewable energy solutions and contributing to conservation projects.”

Brevity and Conciseness

Keep your statement concise; it shouldn’t be longer than a short paragraph. A crisp, well-worded statement would look like, “Within three years, I aim to advance to a Lead Graphic Designer position by consistently delivering innovative designs and taking on more strategic projects.”

Personal Motivation

Include a sentence about what drives you towards this goal, which gives a personal touch to your career goal statement. You might say, “I am committed to becoming an industry-recognized financial analyst by developing cutting-edge quantitative models, fueled by my passion for data-driven decision making.”

The Purpose of Career Goal Statements

A career goal statement helps you and others understand where you’re aiming in your professional life. It serves as both a guide and a benchmark for your career progression.

Professional Development

Your career goal statement is a powerful tool for professional development. It’s a declaration of your ambitions, which often falls into specific categories like acquiring new skills, achieving certifications, or reaching a new position. For example, you might aim to become a certified project manager within the next two years, highlighting the steps and skills you’ll need to get there.

Job Search Focus

When you’re on the job hunt, having a career goal statement gives you a lens to evaluate potential job opportunities. Imagine you’re an engineer seeking roles in renewable energy projects; your career goal statement would specify this preference, allowing you to target your job search and tailor your applications to match your aspirations.

Performance Management

During performance evaluations, your career goal statement offers a clear outline of what success looks like for you. It can act as a communication tool between you and your supervisor, ensuring that you’re both aligned on your targets. If your goal is to lead a team, your performance metrics might include leadership training and successful project outcomes.

Personal Reflection and Growth

Your career statement doubles as a checkpoint for personal reflection and growth. By setting specific goals like enhancing your public speaking skills or learning a new programming language, you create a framework for personal progress, tying these improvements back to your broader career objectives.

Writing Your Career Goal Statement

A career goal statement is a clear and concise description of your professional aspirations. It’s important to chart a course for your career by setting strategic goals and outlining the steps you plan to take to achieve them.

Self-Assessment

Start by evaluating your interests, strengths, weaknesses, and values. This step helps you align your career trajectory with your personal attributes and ambitions.

• If you enjoy creative problem-solving, you might aim for a role in strategic development.
• Someone with a natural talent for communication might target a career in public relations.

Research and Exploration

Learn about the industries and positions that align with your interests and skills. Find out what qualifications you may need and what career advancement may look like in those roles.

• Researching the field of data science might show you the importance of skills like programming and data analysis.
• Exploring the healthcare industry could lead you to consider roles ranging from a health administrator to a nurse practitioner.

Articulating Your Goals

Clearly state your short-term and long-term career objectives. Make them specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART).

• Short-term goal: Completing a professional certification in digital marketing within the next year.
• Long-term goal: Becoming a chief marketing officer at a technology company within the next ten years.

Revising and Refining

Your career goals are not set in stone. Periodically review and adjust them to reflect your growing skills, changes in the industry, and personal life changes.

• Revising your goal to include leadership skills if you’re aiming for management positions.
• Refining your goals to focus more on work-life balance if personal circumstances change.

Examples of Career Goal Statements

When crafting your career goal statement, be specific and align your goals with your desired career path. This section will provide examples for different career stages to guide you.

For Recent Graduates

As a recent graduate, your goal statement should reflect your eagerness to apply your education in a practical setting and grow professionally. For example:

• “My goal is to secure a role as a software developer at a forward-thinking tech company where I can contribute to innovative projects and hone my coding skills in real-world applications.”

For Mid-Career Professionals

For you in mid-career, a statement should focus on advancing your current skills and taking on larger responsibilities. For instance:

• “I aim to elevate my expertise in digital marketing to become a marketing manager, where I can lead strategic campaigns and impact the company’s growth directly.”

For Career Changers

As someone looking to change careers, your statement needs to leverage your transferable skills and express your commitment to the new field. Consider this example:

• “I intend to transition into the field of data analysis, leveraging my extensive background in market research to deliver actionable insights and drive decision-making processes.”

For Executive-Level Positions

Your executive career goal statement needs to showcase your vision for leadership and your ability to steer the company to new heights. An example could be:

• “I am determined to apply my 15 years of managerial experience to a Chief Operations Officer role, focusing on optimizing company-wide operations to boost profitability and efficiency.”

50 Examples of Career Goal Statements

• 1. “To secure a challenging position in a reputable organization to expand my learnings, knowledge, and skills.”
• 2. “Seeking a role at (…) Company where I can contribute to the team’s success while developing my skills as an accountant.”
• 3. “To achieve a lead position in software development that allows me to design innovative solutions and manage a dynamic team.”
• 4. “To become a primary school teacher that inspires young minds and fosters a love of learning.”
• 5. “Aiming to leverage my experience in customer service to become a leading sales representative within the next five years.”
• 6. “To grow into a senior role within the marketing department, contributing to the company’s strategic goals and brand development.”
• 7. “Seeking a position as a clinical practice assistant for a health organization that focuses on the development of innovative medical treatments.”
• 8. “To secure a position as a human resources manager and contribute to an organization’s employee engagement and professional development strategies.”
• 9. “My goal is to become a project manager within a progressive tech company, leading innovative projects to successful completion.”
• 10. “Aspiring to be a top journalist within a major media outlet, reporting on significant global events that shape our world.”
• 11. “To develop a career in finance, eventually becoming a chief financial officer for a well-established corporation.”
• 12. “To obtain a managerial position in the hospitality industry, providing exceptional guest experiences and leading a successful team.”
• 13. “Looking to apply my graphic design skills in a dynamic advertising agency, producing high-quality work for a variety of clients.”
• 14. “To establish myself as a leading real estate agent within the community, known for diligently serving clients and achieving their property dreams.”
• 15. “To become a senior software engineer, specializing in machine learning and artificial intelligence, contributing to cutting-edge technology advancements.”
• 16. “Aspire to join an international non-profit organization, focusing on human rights advocacy and contributing to meaningful change.”
• 17. “To earn a position as a lead researcher in a top-tier biotech firm, focusing on the development of life-saving pharmaceuticals.”
• 18. “To be recognized as an expert in environmental law, working to protect natural resources and promote sustainability.”
• 19. “To secure a role as an art director within a prestigious agency, driving creative strategy and inspiring a team of designers.”
• 20. “Aiming to become a chief operations officer, optimizing organizational processes and enhancing overall efficiency.”
• 21. “To advance my career in the field of education technology, developing innovative tools that facilitate learning and growth.”
• 22. “Seeking to become a master electrician, overseeing complex projects and mentoring apprentices in the trade.”
• 23. “To climb the ranks to a senior data analyst role, transforming data into actionable insights that drive business strategy.”
• 24. “To become a leading figure in digital marketing, known for crafting high-impact strategies that generate measurable results.”
• 25. “Aspiring to be an executive chef in a Michelin-starred restaurant, creating world-class cuisine and leading a top-tier culinary team.”
• 26. “To secure a position as a cybersecurity expert, protecting sensitive information from threats and vulnerabilities.”
• 27. “Aiming to be a respected leader in the field of public health, influencing policy and improving community health outcomes.”
• 28. “To establish a career as a professional musician, performing internationally and sharing my passion for music with diverse audiences.”
• 29. “Seeking a role as an aerospace engineer with a focus on sustainable design and innovation in air travel.”
• 30. “To become a leading architect, known for designing eco-friendly and innovative structures that enhance the urban landscape.”
• 31. “To grow into a senior role in supply chain management, optimizing logistics and contributing to the company’s profitability.”
• 32. “Aspiring to become a senior content creator, producing engaging and informative content that resonates with a wide audience.”
• 33. “To secure a position as a labor and delivery nurse, providing compassionate care and supporting families during a pivotal life event.”
• 34. “To become a principal consultant, offering expert advice and solutions to businesses in my area of expertise.”
• 35. “Aiming to be a top sales manager, driving team performance and exceeding company sales targets consistently.”
• 36. “To secure a leadership position within the field of environmental science, contributing to research and advocacy for climate change mitigation.”
• 37. “To become a recognized expert in user experience design, creating intuitive and user-friendly digital products.”
• 38. “Seeking a role as a professional event planner, executing unforgettable events that exceed client expectations.”
• 39. “To advance to a senior technical writer position, producing clear and concise documentation that supports product development.”
• 40. “Aspiring to be a chief diversity officer, fostering an inclusive workplace culture where all employees can thrive.”
• 41. “To become a lead mechanical engineer in the automotive industry, contributing to the development of innovative and efficient vehicles.”
• 42. “To secure a position as a business analyst, helping organizations to improve processes and systems for better performance.”
• 43. “Aiming to become a senior environmental consultant, providing actionable strategies for sustainable business practices.”
• 44. “To establish myself as a professional photographer, capturing moments and stories through my lens for global publications.”
• 45. “Seeking a role as an investment banker, helping companies to grow and investors to achieve their financial goals.”
• 46. “To become a thought leader in digital transformation, guiding enterprises through the integration of new technologies.”
• 47. “Aspiring to be a senior policy advisor, influencing legislation and policy decisions that impact the public sector.”
• 48. “To secure a position as a professional interpreter, facilitating communication in multiple languages for international organizations.”
• 49. “Aiming to become a leading expert in nutritional science, contributing to healthier lifestyles and dietary choices.”
• 50. “To establish a career as a professional speaker and author, sharing my expertise and inspiring others in my field.”

Frequently Asked Questions

How can you write an effective career goal statement for your resume.

When you write a career goal statement for your resume, start by reflecting on your strengths, skills, and experiences. Then, identify the kind of position you’re aiming for and how your career path aligns with the goals of the company. Use action words and quantify achievements where possible.

What are some examples of short-term career goals in professional development?

Short-term career goals might include obtaining a professional certification, improving specific job-related skills such as public speaking or technical proficiency, or networking to connect with industry leaders. These goals are typically achievable within a few months to two years.

What should be included in a personal career goal statement?

Your personal career goal statement should include your career interests, the competencies you wish to utilize, the type of environment you thrive in, and how you see your career progressing. It gives employers a glimpse into your aspirations and professional philosophy.

Can you give examples of comprehensive goal statements for students?

An example for a student might be: “Graduate with a degree in Environmental Science and secure an internship with a leading sustainability organization, to contribute to effective climate change solutions.” This states the education aim and the practical, immediate objective after graduation.

How do you frame a career goal statement for entry into graduate school?

A career goal statement for graduate school should express your academic interests, how the program aligns with your career plans, and what you intend to accomplish professionally with the advanced degree. This could be working towards a specific research field or role in academia.

What elements make up a compelling and succinct one-sentence career goal?

A compelling one-sentence career goal is specific, mentioning the desired industry or role, is realistic, and includes a timeframe. For example, “To become a certified project manager within the next year and lead technology-related projects in a Fortune 500 company.”

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15 Practical Goal Statement Examples and How to Write Them

By: Author Candice Zhang

Posted on Last updated: February 2, 2024

Categories Career , Goals , Self Development

It’s the start of a new year, which often means new beginnings. With that said, many of us decide to set goals known as ‘resolutions.’ However, goals can come in other forms as well, with one of them being a goal statement.

Instead of setting a new habit, writing a goal statement allows us to pinpoint the ‘wants’ and ‘needs’ of our lives. This allows us to see how we can make the change from our current self to our future self. If we want a better job or a promotion, we can be sure to write this goal down as a sentence, track it, and work towards it. 

Now, you surely have heard of a mission statement and they are typically associated with businesses. So, you may be wondering; “What exactly is a goal statement?” 

What is a Goal Statement? 

Whenever you thought of a personal goal, you probably would have written it down Then over time, kept track of it, and continued to manifest results. You probably thought of something that you really wanted to achieve, and decided that the outcome would be worth it.

So, you decided to work hard towards the goal, regardless of any obstacles or situations that may arise. But in the end, the goals that many of us write in our notebooks are usually results-oriented.

We typically think of the end picture and write what we want to happen, kind of like a vision statement. But we rarely break these goals down into steps and we rarely describe why we want to achieve such goals. 

However, writing a goal statement will solve all of those issues. Instead of outlining the specific results, the goal statement will allow us to analyze why we want to achieve the goal and how we will achieve it. This makes it action and process-oriented. 

Whenever we are feeling devastated and hopeless, we can read our goal statement for some motivation. Plus, we can also add this statement on our cover letter and resume. 

The Benefits of Writing a Goal Statement 

Goal statements do come in handy when needed. Though they may be difficult to brainstorm, there are multiple advantages which outweigh the costs. Some of these benefits include: 

1. They provide direction and motivation 

Whenever our goals and processes aren’t written down, we may find it difficult to focus on one path or outcome. Our personal life circumstances in are always changing, which makes it difficult to stick to a previous goal we’ve set. And due to all of this, we may forget about our goals before attempting to try.

But there’s a way to remember them! When you write these goals down and explain the process in terms of achieving the outcomes, you’re more likely to work towards them.

The statements can provide you with a sense of direction in life as they will help you identify your own values. In fact, research even supports this strategy as well. 

Hence, having a goal statement will give you a sense of direction and motivation. You know what you’ll aim for, and you’ll be able to track your progress towards the ultimate goal. This way, you’ll never lose sight of the bigger picture. 

2. Goal statements allow you to work towards your own true values 

Your goal statement is entirely personal and customizable, depending on your needs and characteristics. By writing down a goal statement you’ll be able to pave your own path towards self-development.

You can chose one which which resonates with your current aspirations, without worrying about the needs of others around you. Hence, goal statements allow you to see the potential you have within yourself. 

Once you identify your own potential, you’ll feel more confident. This can also bring some clarity on long-term career goals or relationship goals.

3. They emphasize the importance of action, not just words. 

Oftentimes, we rely on words in order to motivate ourselves. For example, remember when you have to do chores? Throughout the process, you’re probably thinking of how good it must be to have some chores completed.

After all, your house will look tidy and organized. To remind yourself, or motivate yourself, you may tell a friend, “Oh, I do my chores on Sunday.”  However, Sunday arrives, and you’re exhausted and find yourself recuperating for the week ahead. 

Sometimes, we use words to give ourselves a confidence boost. We tell others what we’re doing to remind ourselves to get started on a particular task. But although words are a great motivator, they won’t necessarily help you complete a task. 

In order to reach the finish line, we’ll have to work towards action. Fortunately, goal statements will help us with that. 

When we’re writing the goal statement, we’re not just thinking about the words and the result. We’re instead thinking about the actions, and the process, which puts us on the right track to reach our long-term goals. 

How to Write a Goal Statement 

There are many methods in terms of writing a goal statement. You can take inspiration from a few, but you shouldn’t just be regurgitating the goal. Remember, you want a goal with results!

Instead, you need to think of the process and the value of the goal. Now, you may ask, “How can I identify that?” Well, let’s explore how to get that started: 

1. Ask yourself what you desire to achieve 

You know those days when we all lie in bed, and wonder what happened to our previous dreams and desires? If you have a previous dream or desire which you still think about fulfilling, keep track of this and perhaps jot it down.

There may be a reason why you continue to think about it. Our passions and callings in life tend to keep making themselves evident. You may find yourself considering a career change or re-examining your social networks.

Perhaps this dream can be one of the smart goals you wish to fulfill in the future. Write down this vision statement as a spring-board for your goal statement and you’ll be headed in the right direction.

2. Focus on the things that bring you joy 

I know it sounds cliché as we probably have heard from multiple people to pursue and “focus on things that we’re passionate about.” However, there’s actually some validity behind the statement. 

Imagine working on a goal that you do not necessarily want to achieve, but feel the need to due to external factors. Would you actually be happy once you achieve it? You may answer “No,” because the goal was not something you have envisioned or planned out for yourself.  

So, pinpoint a few hobbies or activities that bring you joy. Then, list some of your core values or beliefs. You can tie these elements together and work towards your own personal vision for the future. 

3. Identify and believe in the goal statement process 

Goals are perceived as destinations. But in order to get to a destination, we must go through a journey. And the journey in itself is a never ending process. Once you set a goal, you shouldn’t forget about this journey.

The journey is filled with wins and losses. Sometimes, you’ll feel as if you’re near your goal, just to have everything robbed from you. However, you should believe that everything that happens is a lesson. 

You could also incorporate some smaller steps into your outlined goal as well. These small steps will allow you to allocate your goal into other short-term goals, which can be a benchmark for you to work towards. 

When you achieve these smaller goals, you’ll be able to track your progress. Then, you will be fueled by these accomplishments when you feel the need to take on long-term goals. 

4. Remember to incorporate action 

Many goal statements include an action plan and strategy, which outline the process of achieving the outcome. So, whenever you think of a specific goal, be sure to describe what you will do to achieve it in your statement.

Keep the steps involved reasonable to your skills and abilities so they are practical and achievable. This way, you’ll find a way to take initiative and control of your progress. And, this will allow you to track your own results. 

5. Remember there are always external factors 

Often when we set a goal, we are so focused on accomplishing it and start to forget about other external factors which may influence our progress. Unexpected events or changes can be discouraging, or even devastating.

For example, when we want to achieve a perfect attendance rate in school or at work. We often forget that there are times when we may be sick, which will prevent us from going to class in the first place. 

As a result, when such things happen, it’s best to acknowledge that they’re simply out of your control. And you could only react to them by finding a different way to solve the problem. 

In this case, aim for a more realistic goal of 90% attendance rate to account for unforeseen circumstances. Give yourself grace and recognize how the variability of everyday life can influence your goals.

Practical Goal Statement Formats

Now that we covered the basics of writing goal statements, there are multiple goal formulas which we can consider when writing our statement. You can pick any depending on your preferences or goal needs: 

1. SMART Goals

I’m sure we have heard of this term from someone, whether it was from the resume and cover letter sessions or the class reflections which we’re required to finish. 

The SMART goal acronym stands for: 

• Specific: Goals should be specific to you and answer the 5 Ws; who, what, when, where and why. 
• Measurable: Goals should be quantified or have a specific metric assigned to them to ensure that you fulfill them. 
• Attainable: Ensure that you are not setting too high or too low expectations of the specific goal, and that they are attainable with the current or predicted resources. 
• Relevant : Goals should align with your own core values and missions. 
• Time-bound: Make sure to specify when the goal can be achieved by outlining the time expected to achieve each step. 

Example of a SMART goal: 

I want to get a 4.00 GPA next semester by studying and reviewing 2-3 different courses every day for one to two hours, doing the practice questions required, and participating in lectures by answering or asking questions. Before the first midterm, I aim to obtain at least an 80 on one to two assignments. 

This goal is specific, as it identifies the situation in the beginning, which is aiming for a higher GPA. It is also measurable as well, as every aspect of the SMART goal is quantified by a number. For example, the 4.00 GPA and the “80 percent on one or two assignments.”

This SMART goal is attainable as the student is not reviewing a full course load everyday. They are only reviewing some portions of the lecture which is a good idea to keep themselves on track toward the ultimate goal. 

If the student is looking to improve their study habits, the goal is relevant as well. Moreover, this goal is time-bound as it specifies how much time is needed to reach that finish line. 

2. PACT Goals

Another option for a goal-setting method is the PACT formula. The PACT focuses more on the core values and actions of an individual, which may be more of a fit for those looking to write a goal statement. 

In a way this is a statement of purpose and with so much potential for personal development. This formula can also be implemented to create a good mission statement.

PACT stands for: 

• Purposeful: What does the goal mean to you? How can it change you and lead you to develop into a better person? 
• Actionable: What steps can you take towards your goal? 
• Continuous: Even if you do achieve the resulting goal, how can you utilize the new skills you gained towards your own personal or professional development? 
• Trackable: How can you track your goals? What metrics can you use? 

Instead of focusing on specific and measurable goals, PACT goals aim to focus on an individual’s future development based on their own values and characteristics. 

Example of a PACT goal: 

I aim to try out more activities this year based on my own interests as I aim to prioritize my mental and physical well-being more. Since I prefer moving around on my own instead of going to the gym, I will sign up for a weekly beginner’s dance class. Throughout the weeks, I can see how I progress and see which genres I like. If I do end up enjoying the activity, I will try out more dance genres. I’ll be able to find a new activity and prioritize my physical well-being. 

This goal is purposeful, as it outlines the individual’s purpose on why they wanted to set a specific goal. Moreover, steps are also outlined in order to achieve the ultimate goal. For example, signing up for a weekly beginner’s dance class is a good way to start and commit time towards the activity. 

The goal is continuous as well, since it states how the activity can benefit the individual in the future. Since the goal is broken down into time periods (weekly), it easily tracks by week as well. 

3. GROW Goals 

GROW goals require some self-reflection and awareness when analyzing the outcome. However, being able to reflect on your current situation will definitely allow you to realize that you’re able to be in control of your personal life no matter what. 

The acronym stands for: 

• Goal: What is the desired result? 
• Reality: What is happening in your current life right now? 
• Obstacles : What are some of the barriers you’re facing? 
• Will: How can you overcome these barriers and achieve your dreams? 

Example of a GROW goal: 

I hope to find a co-op position in the field of sales and communications. Currently, I’m a student and I work two part-time jobs in retail and customer service. I also have rent and other living expenses to pay. Therefore, I do not have much time to apply to positions or to network. However, I do have a decent amount of savings. So, maybe I can switch my work hours and take a week off in order to prepare for interviews and networking sessions. I will be sure to communicate this with my employer.  

The example above outlines a GROW goal because the first sentence states the desired result, which is securing a co-op position. Then, the student writes about their current living situation and the obstacles that they are facing.

However, they then decide to address these barriers and find new solutions. This is a vital part of the GROW goal statement to ensure success. 

4. HARD Goals 

Sometimes in life we all have to make tough decisions and face difficult situations. We often wonder why we made such a challenging decision, and what was the purpose of the decision we made. 

When we’re questioning these aspects, a good formula to remember is the “HARD” goal formula . These include: 

• Heartfelt: What is your intention when setting this goal? What motivates you to achieve this goal? 
• Animated : How will you feel once you achieve this goal? 
• Required: What makes it important to achieve this goal? 
• Difficult: How difficult will it be to fulfill your desired outcome? 

Example of a HARD goal: 

A fter I complete my bachelor’s degree, I aim to hopefully pursue more studies . I noticed that I enjoy being in a classroom setting and learning new topics, and to me, being educated on different subjects is important. I want to learn more about the world and see the world through various perspectives. It is difficult, as I’ll have to sacrifice lots of time and financial resources. But in the end, the time and financial resources will be worth the fulfillment from my education. 

In this goal, the writer clearly states the intention by writing why they decided to set the goal in the first place. Moreover, the writer touched upon feelings as well, such as “feeling fulfilled.”

The writer also states the importance of learning more about the world through different topics. Difficulties and challenges are also addressed as well, which include the time and financial resources. 

5. OKR Goals 

Sometimes, the complexity behind the other goal-setting formulas can be overwhelming. Fortunately, there is an option to goals in a more simple manner. 

The OKR goals are a simple way to set measurable outcomes, which are broken down into different benchmarks. It works similar to a vision statement and stands for: 

• Objective: What is your big goal? 
• Key Results: What results will you need to achieve in order to reach your big goal? 

Example of OKR Goal: 

My big goal is to one day launch my own startup company. In order to do so, I need to be trained in business operations, accounting, finance, and human resources. I also need to know how to promote and market my brand to my targeted audience as well. I can begin by noticing my interests, creating an inception plan, and pitching my ideas to different ventures. Then once I receive the funding, I can begin with product design and implementation. 

In this goal, the objective defined is an individual launching their own start up company. Then, they decide to describe some key results, which include action items such as creating an inception plan. Also, benchmarks such as pitching ideas and receiving funding are outlined. 

Goal Statement Examples

Now that we have covered some different formulas regarding goal statements we have a toolbox to get started. It is a good idea to brainstorm some of our most recent needs and see how they can impact our goal setting frameworks as well. 

As we have seen, goal statements can be written in a variety of manners. Goal statements are flexible and can be dedicated towards plenty of different industries and settings. 

For now, let’s consider three important aspects of our 20s in terms of goal setting: academic, career, and relationship. 

Academic Goal Statements 

Below are some sample goal statements for those who are in college and university. These goal statements mainly focus on academic performance. 

I hope to make it onto the Dean’s Honor List by obtaining over a ___ GPA (as determined by the school) this year. I need at least a ____ GPA for the first and second semester in order to do so. To do this, I’ll set a schedule and dedicate around 2 hours of studying each day and ensure that I attend lectures on time. When I need help, I will be sure to utilize the tutoring sessions offered by the department.  (SMART). 

I hope to obtain a GPA of 4.00 in one of my human resources courses. Learning about human resources resonates with me as I want to learn more about human behaviour and organizational structures. Being a good student is also what I aim to continue to be as well, since I want more options when I apply to graduate schools. To do this, I can request to seek advice from the professor in regards to unclear instructions, and dedicate around 3 hours of study in this course. I can then utilize these new skills for future courses. My short-term goals can be tracked through the grades of my assignments, whether I see an increase in trend or not. (PACT). 

I hope to increase my GPA from 3.8 to 4.0 this semester. Currently, I have to work and fulfill some extracurricular obligations which may take around 20 hours a week. Therefore, I have limited time for studying. However, I can always decide to study efficiently; perhaps, I can decrease some free time and skip Friday nights. (GROW) 

I aim to get into law school because I am passionate about the legal industry. I have always read books about law and want to learn more about the subject. Once I achieve this goal, I will feel content and realize that I’ll be able to hopefully achieve my dream job as a lawyer. I do need a good CGPA in order to make it into law school, so I need to put in more effort in terms of studying and consult with my professor for my assignments. (HARD)

I aim to get into medical school after graduation. In order to do this, I will have to dedicate some time to study, perhaps volunteer at the hospital, and join a few extracurricular clubs which are focused on health research. I hope to also gain a research assistant position as well. Then, in my third or fourth year, I’ll prepare and take the MCAT exam. (OKR). 

Career Goal Statement Examples 

Whether you’re eyeing on a new promotion, or wanting to improve your professional life, having a career path is a big part of being in your 20s. Below are some sample statements of professional goals:

I hope to gain a new promotion from my current position. I can do this by taking on more initiative in tasks, and trying to see what my supervisor may need assistance with. For now, I will try to take on at least one extra project and see if I can collaborate with my fellow team members. Then, in the next month or so, I can perhaps tackle more projects with others and assist my supervisor with more of their tasks (SMART). 

I hope to get a position related to my degree, as I studied the subject and enjoyed the material. Then, I can apply my academic coursework into my experience. I will start looking for jobs immediately, and ensure that the jobs I apply to are related to the subject I learned at school. Hopefully, this job will bring me new career growth and opportunities. And overtime, through the interviews, I can see what worked or did not work. (PACT). 

I desire to work in the field of accounting as I have graduated from university with a degree in accounting. Right now, I do have the ability to apply to jobs but I am still studying for my CPA exam. I also have a part-time job which may interfere with the interview hours. But to overcome these barriers, I can still continue to apply and see what I can get. I can also ask to get my shifts switched in order to make it to the interviews. (GROW). 

I aim to take on more freelance photography projects throughout the year. I like to create different art forms and work with companies and businesses. Once I achieve this goal, I will feel content that more people are enjoying and being exposed to my work. This goal is important to me as my art is a direct reflection of my emotions. To achieve my professional goals, I will continuously need to promote my services on social media and word of mouth, while practicing my skills. (HARD). 

My big goal is to become an assistant manager at my community centre. In order to do this, I need to take on a few leadership positions. I will apply to some and go through the interview process. Moreover, I will also ask my current manager for mentorship advice, a performance review, and work more hours in my current position for seniority. Throughout this, I will also become more favorable for a potential employer if I choose to apply for other jobs (OKR). 

Relationship Goal Statements 

We all know how difficult relationships are to navigate during adulthood. This can range from the friends we meet in class, to the Tinder date who continuously bombards us online. But there also can be goals set for relationships and friendships as well: 

I hope my partner and I communicate our issues more transparently. We are in the process of booking couple counselling sessions. We aim to go weekly and we hope that they’ll be able to provide us with a sense of direction. (SMART) 

I hope I can apologize to my friend about what I have done previously. I really valued our friendship and believed that I should not have acted the way I did. If I do, I can hopefully build my communication skills and learn to do the right thing next time. This can perhaps also improve the current friendships in my life as well. (PACT)

I hope to get closer to my family, as we once drifted apart during my teenage years. I agree that there were misunderstandings, but now I feel that since I have grown, I finally realize the intention behind their actions. It’s hard to see them currently as I do live away from home, but I will continuously keep in contact with them and see if it is possible to go on trips with them. (GROW) 

I hope to get along with my sister as we were once best friends. Since I moved away, everything changed. However, once I begin to communicate with her, we can support each other. After all, family is important. I understand it is difficult as our schedules often collide, but I can always try my best to reach out whenever I can. (HARD)

My big goal is to find myself a committed, loyal partner. It will take time but I will need to first understand the other individual’s personality, and see how compatible we can hopefully be. I need to communicate more about myself and hopefully, the right person will come along. (OKR).

Final Thoughts on Practical Goal Statements 

Writing a goal statement is similar to creating a mood-board for your future dreams and career aspirations. It involves knowing what you currently want, and working towards achieving the specified outcome. 

Instead of thinking of specific goals, writing goals in the form of statements allows us to see what we truly want, and work towards them. Such statements can allow us to be motivated in terms of completing our personal vision to the next level. 

There are plenty of different methods to write goal statements with multiple examples. There is the SMART approach, which is for more specified and measured goals. And there is the GROW approach, which is for goals that resonate deeply with your own personal values and beliefs. The right one is the method which resonates the most with your mission, and motivates you the best. 

Once you begin writing down your own goal statements, you may notice small changes in your life. You may notice that you’re more optimistic and perhaps, you may decide to tweak your everyday life routine. 

With that being said, achieving goals is not easy most of the time. There are multiple barriers which do get in the way. But when they do, it’s best to take it one step at a time. After all, we can all work towards change throughout our lives. What matters the most to many of us is to not give up. 

About the Author

Candice is currently attending school for social service work. One of her passions is helping others through my writing. In her downtime, you'll find her listening to music, watching random YouTube videos, and writing about career goals and resumes. She hopes to start freelancing for writing and obtain a leadership position in a public services sector.

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How to Write an Awesome Essay About Your Career Goals

• Before you begin, ask yourself a few key questions like:
• What are my short-term and long-term career goals?
• Where do I see myself in ten years?
• What events in my life have led me to have these goals?
• What major will help me reach my goals?
• What skills do I need to reach my goals?
• What impact do I want to have on society?

Career Goals Essay Template

Need more inspiration.

After you brainstorm the responses to these questions, look for common themes, or pick out the most interesting stories. You can build your main essay “thesis” or idea around this.

Once you’ve got the main idea, create an outline to put your ideas into essay format. This will give you a general idea of structure.

You can use the career essays template below to give you some ideas. But remember that some rules are meant to be broken, so don’t be afraid to be innovative and think outside the box!

Also, when you’re done, head over to Going Merry to apply for the Career Goals scholarship essay bundle (one essay, one application, multiple scholarships!). You might as well make that essay count. Sign up for Going Merry to apply for scholarships more efficiently.

Here’s a paragraph-by-paragraph breakdown:

Paragraph 1 : Establish the main theme of what you’re going to talk about. It should also grab the reader’s attention. For example, instead of starting your essay with something generic (e.g. Ever since I was a little girl, I wanted to be a zoologist), get creative with it! Try something like My greatest memory as a young girl was going to the zoo for the first time or While most kids play house or school, I always wanted to play zookeeper.

Paragraph 2 : Elaborate on what inspired your career goals. Perhaps it was a relative, a TV show, or simply an experience that you had. Remember that old writing adage, “Show, don’t tell.” In other words, try to demonstrate your interest with story or description. 

Paragraph 3 : Discuss your short-term career goals and your intended major. How will your intended major help you reach these goals? What skills do you need to learn to reach them? At the end of the paragraph, try discussing how your short-term goals can help you achieve your long-term goals.

Paragraph 4 : Focus on your long-term goals and the impact that you hope to have on society. If you’re not sure what your long-term goals are, don’t sweat it; they’ll probably change anyways. You can instead focus on the difference you’d like to make overall. And don’t worry too much about the size of the impact…remember that just doing what you’re truly passionate about has a massive impact on those around you.

The last paragraph is your conclusion. You can use this paragraph to summarize what you discussed in the previous few paragraphs. If you want to be even more creative, try ending your essay with a question for your readers or a new insight. Good luck!

And now that you’re ready with that essay, put it to good use! You can recycle that same essay, when applying for the Career Goals Scholarship Bundle. We’ve joined together multiple scholarships (all requesting essays on career goals), into just ONE simple application! See more info here , or just sign up to get going.

Check out examples from other students just like you. Here are links to some great career goal essay examples:

• Example 1  
• Example 2  
• Example 3  

Or maybe you’re looking for help with an academic goals essay — we’ve got you covered there too.

Also, check out this helpful list of the 10 most common scholarship essay topics !

Sign up for Going Merry today, and upload your career goal essay right to your profile. It’s that easy!

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Examples of Scholarship Essays for the “Career Goals” Question

Emily Wong is a writer at Scholarships360. She’s worked as a social media manager and a content writer at several different startups, where she covered various topics including business, tech, job recruitment, and education. Emily grew up and went to school in the Chicago suburbs, where she studied economics and journalism at Northwestern University.

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Maria Geiger is Director of Content at Scholarships360. She is a former online educational technology instructor and adjunct writing instructor. In addition to education reform, Maria’s interests include viewpoint diversity, blended/flipped learning, digital communication, and integrating media/web tools into the curriculum to better facilitate student engagement. Maria earned both a B.A. and an M.A. in English Literature from Monmouth University, an M. Ed. in Education from Monmouth University, and a Virtual Online Teaching Certificate (VOLT) from the University of Pennsylvania.

Writing an essay is often the trickiest part of the scholarship application, not to mention the most time-consuming. However, the essay section also allows room for creativity and individuality. If you can communicate effectively, you can use the essay portion to stand out from the crowd. Let’s go over some tips for writing, as well as a couple of scholarship essay examples about career goals.

How to write a scholarship essay 

At this point, you’ve probably gained plenty of experience writing papers for school. However, it may still take a couple of tries to nail the scholarship essay. Since scholarship teams often have to get through a lot of applications, it’s important to stand out while staying concise. Here are some simple guidelines for writing scholarship essays.

See also: How to write a winning scholarship essay (with examples!)

Take five minutes to brainstorm

Before you even start your essay, take some time to gather your thoughts. Think about what you’ll want the paper to focus on. Why did you choose to pursue your career path in the first place? Where do you want to be in five years? How would this scholarship help you further your studies and work toward your goals?

Once you’ve jotted down a few ideas, choose one or two to center your essay on. Identifying the focus of your paper, it’ll make it easier to keep your thoughts organized. In turn, it’ll make it easier for the reader to follow.

Related : How to start a scholarship essay (with examples!)

Stay within the word limit

Unlike the four-page essays that you may have written in English class, scholarship essays are often only a paragraph or two. In order to respect the selection committee’s time, be wary of going too far about the specified word count. A general rule of thumb is to stay within 20 words above or below the limit. That may entail a few rounds of edits to get the wording just right.

Stay positive!

Feel free to use part of your essay to talk about your life’s challenges. After all, the selection committee often wants to give the award to a candidate who needs it. However, make sure your anecdote doesn’t devolve into a sob story. If you’re going to bring up hardships you’ve endured, try to balance it by talking about how you’ve overcome them. By demonstrating resilience, you can show readers how you would use the scholarship to succeed in your current situation.

Leave time to proofread

Especially for a short scholarship essay, proofreading can take as little as 5-10 minutes. Still, it can be tempting to just hit “submit” after your first draft. However, being too impulsive can leave your essay riddled with typos and grammatical errors.

Try to avoid unnecessary mistakes by finishing your draft at least 24 hours before the scholarship deadline. That way, you can proofread it with fresh eyes before you submit it.

If you’re struggling to close out your essay, read how to end a scholarship essay in five steps .

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How to write a 100-word “career goals” essay.

When writing a 100-word essay, you’ll have to choose your content carefully. Since space is limited, you’ll want to identify the most important details to include beforehand.

First and foremost, make sure to clearly communicate your current pursuits. Talk about your academic and extracurricular activities related to your career goals. Additionally, it’s important to be specific about what you plan to do in the future. Then, if you have extra room, you can talk about how the scholarship will help you reach your goals.

My name is Alison MacBride, and I’m a sophomore at the University of Illinois. I’m currently pursuing a major in Journalism with a minor in Natural Resource Conservation. After completing my program, I plan to combine my areas of interest to become an environmental journalist.

During high school, I volunteered at an eco-conscious farm, where I learned about how our actions affect the earth. Since then, I’ve been set on raising awareness for the environment. This scholarship would go a long way in helping me finish my degree with the skills I need to investigate and report about critical issues.

Word count: 100

How to write a 250-word “career goals” essay

For the 250-word essay, you can go into more detail. Give the readers some context by talking about how you first got interested in your chosen career. Storytelling can be especially effective in engaging your audience. Try to capture their attention by choosing one or two concrete examples and relaying them vividly.

Additionally, you can spend more time talking about the scholarship and how it’ll make a difference in your studies. Go into more detail about how and why you need the award, but remember to keep it positive! For more help, check out how to write a 250 word essay . 

I first decided that I wanted to pursue a career in environmentalism in early high school. The summer after my freshman year, I joined a volunteer program at an eco-conscious farm in my community. In addition to helping out with the operations, I learned about current environmental issues related to farming and other consumer industries.

After learning about the agricultural industry’s impact on the planet, I was inspired to make a difference. The next year, I started a monthly earth magazine at my high school in which we broke down environmental issues and offered tips on how to be more eco-friendly. When I started college, I founded an on-campus publication with the same mission.

In recent years, I’ve been troubled to see how some media outlets downplay the gravity of issues like climate change and deforestation. I’ve admired reporters who publish trustworthy and comprehensible information about environmental issues, and I aim to follow in their footsteps.

When I entered college, I was initially concerned that I wouldn’t have enough money to finish my degree. Fortunately, I’ve been able to cover most of my tuition using merit scholarships and paychecks from my part-time job on campus. Receiving this scholarship would allow me more time to focus on acing my classes and pursuing environmental advocacy work on campus.

Word count: 261

Final thoughts

Planning is essential in making your “career goals” essay clear and concise. Hopefully, these scholarship essay examples about career goals can be your guide to writing a scholarship-winning essay. Good luck!

Additional resources

Maybe you need to write a longer scholarship essay? We can help with our writing a 500 word essay guide ! Be prepared and learn how to write essays about yourself and how to craft an impressive personal statement . Learn the differences between a personal statement and a statement of purpose as the terms might come up on college websites. If you haven’t decided on a college already, check out our guide on how to choose a college . No matter where you are in your educational journey, make sure that you apply for all the scholarships you qualify for!

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• Goal Statements

40 Best Goal Statement Examples [Professional / Personal]

You use a goal statement when you’re determined to accomplish something in your life. Goals give you direction and focus while allowing you to take better control of your life. Creating professional goal statements and persona goal statements also provide you with a benchmark to see if you’re working in the right direction and succeeding to achieve the goals you have set.

Table of Contents

• 1 Goal Statement Examples
• 2 What is a goal statement?
• 3 Characteristics of a goal statement
• 4 Career Goal Statements
• 5 Why is a goal statement important for your career?
• 6 Some considerations when writing your goal statement
• 7 Professional Goal Statements
• 8 Tips for creating a goal statement
• 9 Personal Goal Statements
• 10 How to write a goal statement?

Goal Statement Examples

What is a goal statement?

A goal statement is the foundation that you use to plan your work. Good goal statement examples should be properly documented and detailed. It should also completely define the outcome that you seek to accomplish. A proper goal statement format should describe the activity, purpose or outcome that you must do reach your desired end result. When creating your own statement of goals, include the following:

• The outcome that the goal must produce This starts with the word “To” followed by an identification of the object to transform along with the final result it should be in when you have already accomplished the goal. It should pinpoint what result, outcome, and purpose you desire.
• The beneficiaries of your goal This refers to who would benefit from the goals when accomplished and the scope that it would encompass. It should also define how you can achieve such goals and the approach to use to solve problems.
• The benefits that the result will generate for each of the goal’s beneficiaries This identifies the points on how the beneficiaries will be better off as soon as you have achieved the “To” goal. It’s important to always add the time and date by which you should achieve such improvement.
• The limitations or requirements that exist Are the availability of resources that will help you achieve the goal limited? Is there a time constraint for the goal to complete? Are there any actions required for its completion? Is there an existing protocol that you need to follow for completing the goal?

Characteristics of a goal statement

Like any other goal, you need to follow guidelines to achieve them. Whether you’re creating professional goal statements, personal goal statements or even a goal statement for college, the goals you set should be clearly defined, attainable, and decisive. This is the main reason for goal statement examples – to plan, evaluate your plans, and to guide your actions. When creating your goal statement format, make sure it has SMART characteristics :

• Specific Your goal statement should specifically indicate what you need to accomplish. The phrase should use action words like sell, implement, design, build, and so on.
• Measurable The statement must clearly state what you’re supposed to achieve and how long you have to achieve it. Measuring the goal means you can determine when you accomplish it.
• Acceptable You should accept that your goals are necessary and acceptable, especially to your future.
• Realistic This means that you can achieve the goal even if it’s challenging.
• Time-bound The goal statement should specify a time horizon and a deadline for its completion.

Career Goal Statements

Why is a goal statement important for your career?

Goals connote the future and professional goal statements and personal goal statements are all about the future. One great benefit of a goal statement is that it’s your own vision of the future of your career . Just consider it as the final prize that you have your eyes on. You may think at first glance, you might not need this document as it is just an unnecessary formality. But having your own goal statement examples come with several important benefits:

• It helps give your career direction The benefit of having a professional goal statement is that it breaks you out of monotony. Goals themselves are extremely motivating as they inspire you to work more aggressively because you have a clear notion of what you’re working toward. Moreover, focusing on a long-term goal allows you to get a better grasp on the skills you need to hone or develop to make your goal come into reality.
• You can use it to ask yourself difficult – but essential – questions Each day, even on the average ones, you may find yourself asking a lot of questions and you probably won’t take any time out to reflect on which of these questions are really important. Such reflection is essential to ensure you don’t get caught up in the trivialities of everyday life.
• It teaches you accountability Making a career goal statement can entail some degree of intimidation because having documented it, it becomes real and you are now faced with a heightened sense of accountability.

Some considerations when writing your goal statement

Unless written down, career goals tend to have less influence on you. Having them on paper gives your goals a sense of formality on what you want to accomplish. Following are some things to consider when writing your own goal statement:

• Setting unrealistic goals for yourself would be like setting yourself for failure.
• The outcome should be the final result of what you have set up to achieve and not the effort that you put into achieving the goal.
• When creating the statement, make certain that the activities you include are relevant to the outcome of your goal. Most of the time, these activities have a tendency to be more preparatory instead of focusing on the final outcome.
• There should be enough time on the timeline for you to accomplish your goals. Too long a timeline won’t make up for the effort you need to achieve your goal.
• It’s recommended to subdivide your goal into smaller sections if you think that the goal scope is too broad.

Professional Goal Statements

Tips for creating a goal statement

The goals that you set for yourself should motivate you. You can do this by making sure that the goals are important to you. Goals that have little or no interest in the outcome or aren’t relevant to the bigger picture will offer little chances of putting them to work or making them happen. One of the main keys to reaching your goals is your motivation. Here are tips to guide you when creating your own goal statement:

• Take some time to reflect When you finally decide to make your goal statement, don’t rush into it. Take some time to reflect on what you really want to accomplish. This helps you avoid setting goals that you think you must have instead of focusing on a goal that you really want to achieve.
• Write confidently You should be both firm and decisive when setting up your goals. The statement shouldn’t contain vague noncommittal phrases. Start with sentences with words like “I will…” as this makes you sound confident and certain while eliminating ambiguity. Furthermore, decisive words add an element of encouragement each time you go back to your statements. Avoid openers like “I really want to…” or “I really hope I can…”
• Be as specific as possible Your goal statement example can have more impact and give you a sense of direction if it had very specific content. Phrases such as “climbing the ladder…” or “earning more money…” are too vague to awaken your motivation.
• Come up with a plan of action Setting a goal is the best first step – but so is setting a finish line to accomplish it. But all these would become meaningless if you don’t understand what you need to do to make things happen. The latter section of your goal statement should outline and enumerate the steps required to accomplish it. This serves as a roadmap for you to follow towards your goal and is a lot better than just deciding on an objective and have no clues on how to start or where you’re going.

Personal Goal Statements

How to write a goal statement?

You can look at your goal statement as the “North Star” to guides you on your path to fulfill your purpose. Great goal statements can start with asking yourself questions like:

• What do I really want?
• What will make me truly happy
• What will make the people whom I love happy too?

When you have the answers to these simple questions, it’s now time to do a bit of self-reflection. Here, you need to:

• Think about what your ideal life is.
• Wonder about the things that keep you up each night.
• Reflect on your deepest dreams and desires.

Focus more on the things that you want to experience, the growth you want to have, and the contribution you want to make to the world. Make sure that your statement brings into fruition what motivates you the most. The stronger you feel for your goals, the more chances there will be to achieve them.

When creating this statement, use your moral compass to guide you in creating meaningful goals. You can also think about the challenges that you’ve confronted in life when setting your goals. You can consider any positive characteristics that you possess as a personal value and these values are the driving forces that will help you in the realization of a meaningful goal statement.

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Career Goals Essay For Scholarships (With Examples)

• Apply For A Job
• Applying To Multiple Jobs At The Same Company
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• Personal Mission Statement
• Corporate Titles
• Career Goals Essay
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Find a Job You Really Want In

Scholarship programs often want you to write a career goals essay to see that you have a clear plan for how you’ll apply your education to a specific career path. This helps show a scholarship committee why you’re seeking funds for the next step on the path toward your success.

Answering “what are your career goals” effectively can help increase your odds of impressing landing a scholarship opportunity. If you’re a prospective student applying for scholarships, this article will provide tips on how to write a career goals essay, along with essays on career goals examples to help you get an idea of what scholarship committees are looking for.

Key Takeaways:

When you’re writing a career goals essay, make sure to write about the goals that are relevant to the scholarship.

Be honest and use your own voice to stand out in your scholarship essay.

Go into detail about how the scholarship will help you achieve your goals.

What is a career goals essay?

Why scholarship essays ask about career goals, example career goals essay prompts, career goals essay examples, tips for writing a scholarship essay about career goals, what to write in a career goals essay if your goals have changed, career goals essay for a scholarship faq.

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A career goals essay is a personal written explanation that discusses your background, why you’re interested in participating in the program, and what career you’d like this degree to lead into. A scholarship essay functions to explain why you want to achieve your professional goals and how you intend to get there.

In almost every application process, a portion asks the candidate to answer an essay question. When applying to an educational program, like an MBA, the essay prompt usually relates to your career goals .

Scholarship essays ask about career goals to assess your enthusiasm for the program, learn more about how the scholarship will help you, and ensure that you’ve considered how the program will help you achieve your goals for the future:

Assess your enthusiasm. Passion is important for scholarship administrators, and if you’re able to articulate your enthusiasm for a specific career path , it will show that you’re determined to meet the requirements to reach that goal. The most specific and well-thought-out your essay is, the easier it will be for a reader to understand your devotion and commitment to the program and the field it will allow you to enter.

Learn how the scholarship will help you. Having a firm grasp of your career goals is great, but it’s equally important that you express exactly how the specific program relates to those goals. This shows that you’ve researched the merits of the program and understand exactly how it fits into your professional goals.

Show you’ve considered your future. This goes along with the first two points — show that you know how to set goals and consider the path toward achieving those goals, and you’ll have an easier time convincing the reader that you’ll know how to set goals while participating in the program. They’ll see that you know how to prioritize education because you have a clear vision for navigating your career path.

While some scholarships might come right out and simply ask, “What are your career goals?” most will rework the question into something different that still accomplishes the same goal.

Below are some examples of career goals essay prompts that a scholarship program could pose to its applicants:

Discuss your career goals. Many scholarships prefer the most direct approach when giving an essay prompt to their applicants. This type of question gives the candidate a lot of wiggle room to discuss their passions, motivations, and career goals.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years ? This question is often used as a prompt for a career goals essay because it gives the applicant a timeline to describe their aspirations. It forces them to be realistic about where their career will be and how they will accomplish this within the next ten years.

How will this scholarship contribute to your professional success? A scholarship committee wants to be sure that the money they’re giving will contribute to a student’s overall professional success. This question asks about the applicant’s game plan in the long-term and evaluates how this program is going to assist in their future.

What is your dream job ? Since a dream job is often categorized as a person’s career goals, this is a common question phrasing in scholarship essays. Asking about a candidate’s dream job answers whether this program aligns with the student’s long-term career goals.

What matters most to you and why? Sometimes, a scholarship essay prompt won’t ask about your career or future at all. Instead, they’ll ask a question like this that assesses your motivations , values, and character.

Use these examples of career goals essays for scholarships to help write your own. Pay special attention to how they’re organized, rather than the content, to inspire your own career goals essay:

Career goals essay example 1 – Discuss your career goals

When I was six years old, I was riding bikes with my older sister around our neighborhood. She had just taught me how to ride, and I was excited to have to freedom to explore with her. When she was rounding a particularly difficult bend to see around, a car happened to be coming along at the same time. It struck her. That bike ride changed our lives forever. Over the next year, I went with my sister every Tuesday and Thursday to her physical therapist ’s appointments to help her regain walking strength. Watching her physical therapist patiently assist my sister back to becoming herself awoken something in me. A passion for helping others in the same way eventually turned into a career goal of becoming a physical therapist myself. I decided to get my bachelor’s degree in exercise science. After graduating in 2019, I knew that the next step for me was to attend a graduate program in physical therapy. I was accepted to Lassell University Master of Science in Rehabilitation Services. This presented me with my latest goal along my career path, and I’m eagerly waiting to start. This scholarship would help me afford the wonderful opportunity to be a part of the Lassell University class of 2023, allowing me to continue working towards my ultimate career goal of becoming a physical therapist and helping others to become themselves again.

Career goals essay example 2 – Where do you see yourself in ten years?

In ten years, I will have been successfully running my own construction business for about five years. I’m currently a second-year student at the University of Texas, pursuing a master’s degree in business administration. I decided to get my MBA because I knew it would be a positive asset toward my long-term career goal of owning a construction business. In my high school years, I worked as a construction apprentice for a local business. I loved many aspects of the business, such as building something from nothing. I knew that I wanted to incorporate this work into my long-term career, but I didn’t want to work as an apprentice . This led me to pursue business. In ten years and with the help of this scholarship, I will have graduated with my MBA almost a decade prior . After graduation, I plan to take a business administration internship with a carpentry business to help myself get a footing in the field. After about two years of this, I will have started my own construction business.

Career goals essay example 3 – What matters most to you and why?

The people I surround myself with matter most to me. Whether it be my relatives, friends, or professional acquaintances, I always care the most about the happiness of the people around me. Making the people around me happy matters the most to me because I truly because we find our happiness through others. I believe that this drive to make a positive impression on the people around me is what drove me towards a career as a nurse . I always thought of hospitals as places where people need someone to support them and make their day a little happier. I wanted to be one of those who spend their careers positively impacting people in need. This scholarship will enable me to finally afford nursing school and go after my dream job full force.

Career goals essay example 4 – What are your short- and long-term career goals, and how will earning this degree contribute to achieving those goals? Please provide a minimum of 200 words.

My short-term career goals involve working directly with underprivileged young people to increase the literacy rate in my community. As a student of an underfunded and understaffed school, I’ve seen firsthand how much of an impact early literacy education makes on long-term achievement. It broke my heart to see my peers embarrassed at their struggle with reading at an advanced age, and this shame added another dimension to their lack of opportunity. Being a literacy educator for young people would allow me to serve this community directly to show them not only the necessity of strong written communication skills, but the joy of reading for pleasure. This program focuses specifically on early literacy, and would provide me a direct route to a career in serving the community I hope to serve. As for long-term career goals, I hope to one day create a program where socioeconomically parents can bring their children for literacy education, not only to increase their ability to navigate the world of language, but also to instill confidence and joy in the written word. What drew me to this program was that it also has administrative, legal, and business dimensions that would set me on the path toward achieving this goal.

Here are some tips to keep in mind for writing a career goals scholarship essay:

Write about goals relevant to the scholarship. Although you may have many different kinds of goals for your personal and professional future, a scholarship essay only discusses objectives that are relevant to the program you’re applying for.

Be honest. Applying for a scholarship is stressful because the applicant’s education is usually reliant on receiving these funds in one way or another. Even though it’s tempting to exaggerate your skills or pretend you’re more passionate about something than you are to make yourself a more competitive applicant, it’s a bad move.

Use your own, unique voice. The essay portion of a scholarship application is your chance to stand out by using your voice. Nobody else, regardless of their academic or professional achievements, is you. Make this clear in your career goals scholarship essay by keeping your unique written voice engrained in the words you produce.

Be specific. A big reason that scholarship committees ask applicants to write a career goals essay is to determine how prepared they are in planning their long-term professional goals. They aren’t interested in providing a scholarship to students who aren’t going to follow through with their career plans.

Explain long and short-term goals . Even if the essay prompt asks you to describe where you see yourself in ten years, you still need to tell them the steps leading towards this picture of success.

Include the short-term goals that add up to your larger career objectives in your essay response. Explain how accomplishing the smaller goals gives you an advantage when tackling long-term ones.

Explain how the program and scholarship will help you. Before writing your career goals essay, consider how this program and scholarship will help you in your career. The answer to this question is essential.

Follow the essay formatting guidelines. This may sound obvious, but it’s surprisingly easy to forget this step when your essay is finally flowing and when you’re scrambling to get it submitted on time.

Check, double-check , and triple-check the essay guidelines for content, word count, and formatting requirements. If you miss any of these steps, your essay may be immediately disqualified no matter how good it or the rest of your application is.

Many times career goals essays are written by students who have already completed at least some college or are applying to a post-graduate program and need more money to continue.

There’s a good chance that your career goals have changed since you started or graduated college. For example, say you wanted to be an engineer , so you got your undergraduate degree in engineering but realized you didn’t like it after working in the industry for a few years.

You decided that nursing would be more up your alley, and now you’re applying for a scholarship for a nursing program. While this isn’t unusual, it can make it more difficult to write a career goals essay since your past work doesn’t necessarily match your future goals.

In this case, you’ll simply need to explain why you changed your career path and why this next one is the best choice for you. Share your decision-making process to show that you haven’t taken the switch lightly, and talk about what you’ve already done to try to pursue this path.

How do you write a career goal for a scholarship essay?

You write a career goal for a scholarship essay by sharing your passion, explaining both your long- and short-term goals, and relating your goals to the scholarship.

Explain why you want to pursue the career you’re pursuing, where you hope to be in the future and how you plan to get there, and how the scholarship will help you do this.

How do you describe your career goals in an essay?

You describe your career goals in an essay by explaining what you want to do in your career, why you decided on this career path, and what you’ve done so far to make that a reality.

You can usually work these factors into any prompt you receive, so think through them before you start writing so that you can use them as an outline of sorts.

What are career goals examples?

Examples of career goals include:

Working as a grant writer for a nonprofit organization.

Becoming a department manager and eventually an executive in your field.

Owning your own plumbing company.

Caring for underserved communities as a nurse practitioner .

What are some goals for success?

Some goals for success include growing in your role, building your network, and finding joy in the job. Most careers don’t just happen overnight and require you to set the right milestones that work best for you. Not everyone will have the same goals for success.

How do you start a career goals essay for a scholarship?

You can start a career goals essay for a scholarship by directly answering the prompt. Most scholarship prompts include a word count of between 200 and 500 words, so it’s essential that you immediately respond to the prompt. Attention-grabbing sentences and narratives can be helpful for setting the scene, but an efficient and direct answer will show a clarity of mind that helps enhance the quality of your answer.

BLS – Career planning for high schoolers

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Sky Ariella is a professional freelance writer, originally from New York. She has been featured on websites and online magazines covering topics in career, travel, and lifestyle. She received her BA in psychology from Hunter College.

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Writing Tips for a Career Goals Essay (2023)

Jennifer Finetti Mar 1, 2023

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For your college scholarship essay, you may be asked about your career goals. The scholarship committee wants to see how investing in your education will help your career. Do you have a definitive plan? Will a college education fit into that plan? These are the answers they want to see.

In this guide, we will provide some scholarship essay examples about career goals to jumpstart your essay writing.

Writing tips for career goals scholarship essays

Here are some quick tips for writing career goal scholarship essays:

• Write about career goals that tie into the scholarship. This doesn’t mean you have to lie about your career goals to make them fit. Find a way to relate them to the scholarship committee or other elements of the scholarship.
• Be precise about your career goals. Avoid vague statements that suggest you do not have a plan. Judges like to see determination because it shows they’re making a worthy educational investment.
• Discuss how your education will help you achieve your career goals. The scholarship will assist with your education. Show a connection between the two so they can see why you deserve this scholarship.
• If you mention multiple goals, indicate which one you feel most strongly about. Longer essays may allow you to mention a backup plan, but the committee needs to see where your focus lies.
• Avoid cliché statements. Describe how your specific talents, experiences, and degree pursuits will help you succeed.
• Point out solutions, not problems. You may mention struggles you’ve had in the past, but pinpoint how you will learn from them. Moreover, show how those struggles led to your career goals.
• Organize your thoughts in a fluid manner. This will most likely be in chronological order, starting with your degree and progressing through your career growth.
• Write, revise, rest, revise. This goes for any essay writing. Write the first draft from start to finish. Then read through it and edit any grammar or flow errors. Take a break, preferably overnight, and then re-read your content with fresh eyes.

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Example 1: Scholarship essay about career goals (100 words)

In a 100-word scholarship essay, you need to quickly make your point. There is not enough room for a lengthy intro or backstory. Use concise, comprehensive statements to deliver the most information in the fewest words.

I’m a sophomore at Texas Tech University, pursuing a bachelor’s degree in Companion Animal Science. After graduation, I hope to attend Texas A&M to become a veterinarian serving rescue organizations and animal shelters. I was born and raised in the south, where it is common for people to abandon animals in rural areas. Those animals then go into a rescue – emaciated, frightened, and confused. I want to work with rescues to provide affordable veterinary medicine to the animals they save. This scholarship would help me continue my education and potentially save thousands of abandoned animals in the future.

Word count: 99

Example 2: Scholarship essay about career goals (250 words)

With a 250-word scholarship essay, you have a little more room to discuss the details of your career goals. You can explain situations from your past that inspired your career pursuits. You could use one paragraph to talk about your short-term goals and another to talk about your long-term goals. Just make sure the big picture ties into the scholarship.

My name is Patrick Holden and I am a freshman at the University of Michigan, majoring in English and minoring in linguistics. I plan to become an English teacher, but this wasn’t always what I had in mind.  When thinking about my future, I always saw myself in some sort of corporate office, perhaps as an executive assistant or a loan officer at a bank. My father works in the finance office for a car dealership and my mother works at a call center. I assumed I would follow a similar, albeit boring, path in life. In my junior year of high school, everything changed. My English teacher inspired me in ways I could have never imagined. She got me to love writing, literature, etymology, and everything about the English language. She made me want to be a better student in all of my classes, and she helped me see the value of education. I decided then that I wanted to inspire other students just as she did for me. My parents are unfortunately not able to contribute much toward my college expenses. I have earned a tuition scholarship based on my ACT score, but I still need additional funding for books and supplies. English majors have particularly high book costs because we have to purchase multiple books for each class. With the help of this scholarship, I could afford to continue my degree and become an English teacher.

Word count: 240

Example 3: Scholarship essay about career goals (500 words)

With 500 words or more to play around with, you have plenty of space to talk about your career goals. Maintain the same theme throughout the scholarship essay. Each paragraph should connect to the next, and they should all work together to describe your career plan. Avoid making disconnected statements for the sake of word count. In the end, the scholarship committee should have a clear view of your educational plans and professional aspirations.

Internet marketing has gone from an optional method of advertisement to a vital step in business outreach. Even small businesses in remote towns look to the internet to attract customers and spread the word about their services. I am currently pursuing a Bachelor of Science in Business Marketing with an emphasis on Digital Marketing. With this training, I will be able to enter a profession that will only grow year by year. When I was younger, I found print advertisements to be fascinating. I loved reading the newspaper with my father just to see the full-page ads in between stories. When I got older though, those ads became less appealing because they were not adaptive. They seemed dated, static and ill-fit for changes in society. That’s when I discovered internet marketing. It was still in its infancy when I was in middle school, but by the time I graduated high school, it had become a staple in business development. I loved the way internet marketers had to constantly adjust to fit Google’s algorithms, new mobile devices, and new audiences. I knew this was the career for me. Originally, I planned to focus solely on business marketing because there were not many digital marketing degrees available. Over the last two years though, several schools throughout the country have developed internet marketing courses that explain fundamental methods of search engine optimization, website analytics, and more. These are the foundations I will build my career around. The best part about internet marketing is that there is always something new to learn. I can use my creative mind and exploratory nature to try new advertising methods that help businesses succeed. Every time they do well, I do well. This is the kind of job fulfillment most people can only dream of, but my educational plan and job prospects will allow me to achieve it. I have picked up some freelance jobs online to supplement my studies and help pay for my education. It is difficult to maintain a steady stream of income in freelance because I spend so much time on my school work. This scholarship could offset some of the costs and reduce my workload as a whole. While I will still work throughout the semester and full-time in the summers, having extra financial aid would greatly reduce my stress in college. I look forward to a future where I can use my marketing skills to help business owners achieve their career goals. I plan to spend the first few years after graduation working for a successful, long-standing digital marketing company. After I have enough on-the-job training to feel confident in my abilities, I will open my own internet marketing company in Chicago, where my family lives. I have a clear picture of where I will be in the next 10 years, and I know this degree is going to help me get there.

Word count: 481

• Scholarship Essay

Jennifer Finetti

As a parent who recently helped her own kids embark on their college journeys, Jennifer approaches the transition from high school to college from a unique perspective. She truly enjoys engaging with students – helping them to build the confidence, knowledge, and insight needed to pursue their educational and career goals, while also empowering them with the strategies and skills needed to access scholarships and financial aid that can help limit college costs. She understands the importance of ensuring access to the edtech tools and resources that can make this process easier and more equitable - this drive to support underserved populations is what drew her to ScholarshipOwl. Jennifer has coached students from around the world, as well as in-person with local students in her own community. Her areas of focus include career exploration, major selection, college search and selection, college application assistance, financial aid and scholarship consultation, essay review and feedback, and more. She works with students who are at the top of their class, as well as those who are struggling. She firmly believes that all students, regardless of their circumstances, can succeed if they stay focused and work hard in school. Jennifer earned her MA in Counseling Psychology from National University, and her BA in Psychology from University of California, Santa Cruz.

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Career Goals Essay: How to Earn an A grade

Updated 02 Jul 2024

Career goals essay is, essentially, personal statement or motivation letter with minor differences that focus on specific careers or choices behind them. As a mixture of skills, personal values, interests, experience, aspiration, and education, setting of career goals may sound clear in words, yet writing it down is more difficult as it requires structure. That's when our academic essay help writing services come in handy. Correct and accurate planning is as important as setting of right goal. Since there are different requirements followed in each degree, there are general rules that will help you to become successful leader. Make sure to look through provided example to see how degree like software engineering requires specific creative thinking.

Definition and Proper Structure Rules

A career goals essay speaks of what a student wants to be in the future and what personal and professional goals one wants to achieve. In addition to general (or specific, depending on a subject) career aspirations, professionals recommend listing the most significant achievements that make person good fit for chosen career, university, or job position. A good idea is to speak of educational programs, curriculum details to explain and justify choice being made. If there are any scholarships, mention them as well. For reference, you can consult one of our expert writers for scholarship essay examples about career goals or participate in the competition and ask " write my scholarship essay for me ".

Note that a career goals essay is not only listing diverse achievements and benefits, but explaining one's route towards success.

Majority of career goals essays should include this structure:

• Introduction with thesis

Introduction and thesis should have hook sentence that makes committee or an employer interested. Next, program or career position are specified. In thesis statement, specify why and what goals are planned for achievement.

• Main body paragraphs

Body paragraph in an essay on career is careful narrative about experiences, skills achieved, events, experiences a person has. There should be logical connection from point to point, so that future plans are made clear. Mention such facts of life and work in volunteering, diverse internships, special skills, talents, or foreign languages. Any awards of scholarships related to chosen program or career can be mentioned, too.

Conclusion part is a summary of all aforementioned points. It should specify a particular job position or a college.

• Call for action

A call to action is an accurate request, especially in a case of a job application. One can mention readiness for an interview or meeting with an admission committee member. It is like what are your career goals essay turned to action, a paragraph that speaks of your confidence and readiness to start with a college course or planned employment. As a general rule, keep it short, be emotional, if your subject and situation allow it.

Read Also: Essay on Leadership : Qualities, Essay Samples and Writing Steps

Expert Writing Tips for Successful Essay

Without a doubt, there is no universal recipe for a successful essay on career as each case is unique and special. Nevertheless, these writing tips should help you to feel confident that no important points are missed

• Always use your own style! Remember that your own voice is what makes a career goal essay successful! Do not just list your achievements, but allow a person reading your essay to feel and identify a person between the lines. Colleges in the United States review hundreds of career goals essays and scholarships applications, so they look for unique personalities that do not mimic others, but speak in their own style. Our essay writer service provides students professional academic writing assistance with any type of essay!
• Brainstorm your thesis statement! Write down several ideas or make sure to brainstorm them for accuracy and full reflection of your goals. Remember that thesis statement here has to tell of what you are planning to achieve, why, and how. Among numerous college essay ideas , it is important to choose one that reflects your goals and aspirations. Always be objective!
• Use clear and logical structure! A clear and logical structure is what will help reader to read an essay to its ending. Start with most important points that show you as a worthy candidate and continue with specific experiences and soft skills like patience, ability to work in time-critical and demanding situations, etc. Remember that a structure has to be engaging and related to provided thesis statement.
• Do not avoid listing your credentials only as your CV already does that! Try to connect achievements with future plans instead, so this way your career highlights relate to specified future goals.
• Create an outline! An outline is important when list of achievements and goals can seem confusing. You have to think critically as you sort out the best ideas.
• Always proofread your essay! Most colleges, as well as universities in the United States evaluate career goals essays by grammar rules and writing accuracy, so do not underestimate an importance of academic writing, grammar, punctuation. Make sure you check your assignment line by line and don't need to find who is going to " edit my essay ", but if you do our service is able to help you.

Need more writing assistance?

Connect with our top writers and receive a Career Goals essay sample crafted to your needs.

Educational and Career Goals Essay Examples

• Career Goals Essay Sample #1: Special Education Teacher for Autistic Children Career

As a child, I had a best friend who was on an autism spectrum. Being an avid reader, I used it as way to escape harsh reality of being bullied. Still, I realized that I have to work for others weaker than me. Reading to my autistic friend, I saw it as a chance to make a difference and be positive change in society. In high school, I used to work as a Teacher's Assistant by taking diverse educational responsibilities and helping to find common language with "problem children". Applying for XYZ college program, I hope to achieve…

• Career goals essay sample #2: Software Engineering Job Position

Choosing software engineering is something that has always been in my nature. Even in children’s games, I always tried to compose helpful guides for everyone to understand rules of the game. Making every product clear and accessible is what inspires and motivates me in daily life. As a special award winner in Maths and Physics volunteering projects, I had a unique chance of internship at XYZ company, which helped me to learn the basics of diverse software solutions and work methods of modern mobile market. This experience has helped me to analyze adjacent work positions and learn professional roles of different members of software team. Applying for XYZ position at your company, I hope to continue my education in practice by learning how to work in challenging and time-critical projects. As responsible and hard-working individual, I am known for settling down workplace conflicts by helping every person feel valued and special. Using my knowledge of Python solutions and iOS applications, I hope to contribute to team’s vision of meeting market demands. My goal is to create products that are timely and relevant for society’s needs. Providing my CV with a detailed description of software projects and applications that I have completed, I am ready for personal interview and professional evaluation test by one of XYZ company’s specialists. Aiming for excellence and high productivity, my goal is to make XYZ well-deserved leader in the field of engineering where every team member makes a difference.

A Final Bit of Writing Help From Professional Writers

Just when you need a little bit of help and advice with career goals essay, professionals at EduBirdie are ready to assist you online 24/7. Expert proofreading in any field, high-class professionals can help you deliver plagiarism-free essays.

A process of choosing writer with EduBirdie system is simple:

• Navigating to EduBirdie website, you choose  writer according to subject, credentials, list of essays completed.
• You can always choose between several writers that fit your requirements.
• Entire process is transparent, so you can control work of an assigned writer at every step of writing process.
• You pay for college essay only when you are fully satisfied with final result.
• Every essay is 100% plagiarism free and includes proofreading, checking for professional accuracy.
• You can always contact assigned writer directly through our system. If writer is not immediately in touch, you can always contact our support team 24/7.

From career goal topic ideas to polishing of a final essay, our writing experts can help you deliver one’s best in direct conversation, based on provided needs and requirements.

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Written by Jeremy Raynolds

One of the most hard-working and thoughtful personalities, Jeremy holds a Ph.D. in Psychology and Masters degree in Sociology. Jeremy likes to write about professional development, career growth, education, social issues, and motivation. He believes in the culture of sharing things and learning non-stop, which is why his writing reminds of talking with an old friend who truly cares.

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10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

• Essay 1: Summer Program
• Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
• Essay 3: Why Medicine
• Essay 4: Love of Writing
• Essay 5: Starting a Fire
• Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
• Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
• Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
• Essay 9: Eritrea
• Essay 10: Journaling
• Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

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Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

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October 13, 2022

How to Write a Goal Statement for Graduate School

Note: This article uses the terms “statement of goals,” “goal statement,” and “statement of purpose” interchangeably, to reflect the variable language used in graduate application prompts.

Motivations matter

Your statement of purpose is one of the best ways you can sell the admissions committee on you as a well-qualified, purposeful candidate. A strong goal statement will demonstrate your knowledge of your chosen field, your suitability for it, as well as your intellectual development, maturity, and ability to write and think clearly. Further, it will prove that you understand what you’re getting into and that you are committed to attending and completing a demanding academic program.  This is important, because graduate admissions committees want to know that you understand and are realistic about your academic and professional goals, and how your chosen program will serve you in reaching these goals.   

As a first step in planning the content of your essay, think about your motivations for your career choice. What first got you interested in this course of study? What experiences have confirmed that this academic focus is ideal for you? When did you realize that this wasn’t just a casual interest but a serious and sustained interest that has become the basis of a career? Additionally, identify specialty areas that interest you most. If you are applying for an art history MA, for example, name artistic traditions, historical time periods, admired artists, and methods of analysis that appeal to you. Refer to particular scholars who have shaped the field, and professors, especially those at your target school , who will play critical roles in your academic training.

Share some “snapshots” of the experiences that made you want to enter this field. As you consider which anecdotes to share, include those that will reveal your career motivations behind the financial. Additionally, write about elements of your background that make you stand out from the crowd of other applicants who want to achieve much the same thing.

Show your prep work

Your undergraduate major may be a starting point to reveal the foundation you’ve already laid, but you may have also taken post-graduate courses, earned a certification, or worked in the field for a period of time. These activities provide a track record of your commitment to this career or field of study. Explain not only what you know about your field, but also what you don’t know. Openly conveying this  awareness shows you’ve done your homework about why you need this program and how you will apply the knowledge afterward.

Personality counts

Being well suited to a career involves much more than academic talent alone. Your personality, aptitudes, and interests also play a role. For example, some people enter the academic world because they have a burning desire to teach; others are born researchers whose dream job would involve spending all day in a lab. If you are going for a social work degree, can you see yourself handling the constant flow of listening to people’s serious, often heart-breaking problems? Do you have the balance of empathy and boundaries so that this is suitable for you? Think about your personality profile and how you have discovered in what field, and in what role, you will fit.

Work with a grad school admissions expert to create a statement of purpose that gets you accepted >>

Consider your “fit” with your target school

You may have always dreamed of getting your degree from an Ivy League school, but remember: The best school for you is the one that fits YOUR needs, and the school where you also fulfill the needs of the program. 

How do you assess whether there is mutual “fit”? Read the program’s website closely; read student profiles and blogs, read up on faculty profiles and identify who has done work in your field of interest, written books or taught courses that appeal to you. If you plan to apply for teaching or research assistantships, have you contacted faculty members with experience or publications in your area of interest who could sit on your committee? Have you come up with a “short list” of courses that will bring you closer to your career goals?

What sorts of departmental opportunities exist, such as special labs, study-abroad programs, internships, or clubs or monthly workshops? How does the location of the program suit your academic, professional, and personal goals? Make sure it is clear to both you and to your target school why you are a perfect match.

What’s your post-graduate plan?

How well versed are you in the career options available to you after earning your degree? Be prepared to identify the potential places of employment and/or job functions you hope to get after completing the program. Your research can include internet and library searches, talking to people already in your field of choice, and reading articles on industry websites. 

If you are headed into academia, do you envision yourself on the “tenure track,” teaching and researching at a large university? Or teaching at a community college where you may have a private practice on the side? Will you be able to achieve your career goals with your master’s degree, or will a Ph.D. be the natural next step? Be clear in your statement about where you hope to land professionally or academically at the end of the program. 

Remember that graduate school is one step in an ongoing and flexible process. No school requires that you “promise” them you’ll assume a certain career post-graduation. Still, even if you anticipate that your career could take you in several different directions, try to commit to a single clear career path in your application. You can always change your mind!

If you would like the guidance and support of experienced admissions consultants as you work on your statement of purpose or other parts of your grad school application, Accepted is here to help. We offer a range of services that can be tailored exactly to your needs.

For 25 years, Accepted has helped applicants gain acceptance to top undergraduate and graduate programs. Our expert team of admissions consultants features former admissions directors, PhDs, and professional writers who have advised clients to acceptance at top programs worldwide including Harvard, Stanford, Yale, Princeton, Penn, Columbia, Oxford, Cambridge, INSEAD, MIT, Caltech, UC Berkeley, and Northwestern.  Want an admissions expert to help you get Accepted? Click here to get in touch!

Related Resources:

• 5 Fatal Flaws to Avoid in Your Graduate School Statement of Purpose , a free guide
• How Personal is Too Personal?
• How to Write a Great Statement of Purpose, a podcast episode

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• How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

Published on February 12, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on July 3, 2023.

A personal statement is a short essay of around 500–1,000 words, in which you tell a compelling story about who you are, what drives you, and why you’re applying.

To write a successful personal statement for a graduate school application , don’t just summarize your experience; instead, craft a focused narrative in your own voice. Aim to demonstrate three things:

• Your personality: what are your interests, values, and motivations?
• Your talents: what can you bring to the program?
• Your goals: what do you hope the program will do for you?

This article guides you through some winning strategies to build a strong, well-structured personal statement for a master’s or PhD application. You can download the full examples below.

Urban Planning Psychology History

Table of contents

Getting started with your personal statement, the introduction: start with an attention-grabbing opening, the main body: craft your narrative, the conclusion: look ahead, revising, editing, and proofreading your personal statement, frequently asked questions, other interesting articles.

Before you start writing, the first step is to understand exactly what’s expected of you. If the application gives you a question or prompt for your personal statement, the most important thing is to respond to it directly.

For example, you might be asked to focus on the development of your personal identity; challenges you have faced in your life; or your career motivations. This will shape your focus and emphasis—but you still need to find your own unique approach to answering it.

There’s no universal template for a personal statement; it’s your chance to be creative and let your own voice shine through. But there are strategies you can use to build a compelling, well-structured story.

The first paragraph of your personal statement should set the tone and lead smoothly into the story you want to tell.

Strategy 1: Open with a concrete scene

An effective way to catch the reader’s attention is to set up a scene that illustrates something about your character and interests. If you’re stuck, try thinking about:

• A personal experience that changed your perspective
• A story from your family’s history
• A memorable teacher or learning experience
• An unusual or unexpected encounter

To write an effective scene, try to go beyond straightforward description; start with an intriguing sentence that pulls the reader in, and give concrete details to create a convincing atmosphere.

Strategy 2: Open with your motivations

To emphasize your enthusiasm and commitment, you can start by explaining your interest in the subject you want to study or the career path you want to follow.

Just stating that it interests you isn’t enough: first, you need to figure out why you’re interested in this field:

• Is it a longstanding passion or a recent discovery?
• Does it come naturally or have you had to work hard at it?
• How does it fit into the rest of your life?
• What do you think it contributes to society?

Tips for the introduction

• Don’t start on a cliche: avoid phrases like “Ever since I was a child…” or “For as long as I can remember…”
• Do save the introduction for last. If you’re struggling to come up with a strong opening, leave it aside, and note down any interesting ideas that occur to you as you write the rest of the personal statement.

Once you’ve set up the main themes of your personal statement, you’ll delve into more detail about your experiences and motivations.

To structure the body of your personal statement, there are various strategies you can use.

Strategy 1: Describe your development over time

One of the simplest strategies is to give a chronological overview of key experiences that have led you to apply for graduate school.

• What first sparked your interest in the field?
• Which classes, assignments, classmates, internships, or other activities helped you develop your knowledge and skills?
• Where do you want to go next? How does this program fit into your future plans?

Don’t try to include absolutely everything you’ve done—pick out highlights that are relevant to your application. Aim to craft a compelling narrative that shows how you’ve changed and actively developed yourself.

My interest in psychology was first sparked early in my high school career. Though somewhat scientifically inclined, I found that what interested me most was not the equations we learned about in physics and chemistry, but the motivations and perceptions of my fellow students, and the subtle social dynamics that I observed inside and outside the classroom. I wanted to learn how our identities, beliefs, and behaviours are shaped through our interactions with others, so I decided to major in Social Psychology. My undergraduate studies deepened my understanding of, and fascination with, the interplay between an individual mind and its social context.During my studies, I acquired a solid foundation of knowledge about concepts like social influence and group dynamics, but I also took classes on various topics not strictly related to my major. I was particularly interested in how other fields intersect with psychology—the classes I took on media studies, biology, and literature all enhanced my understanding of psychological concepts by providing different lenses through which to look at the issues involved.

Strategy 2: Own your challenges and obstacles

If your path to graduate school hasn’t been easy or straightforward, you can turn this into a strength, and structure your personal statement as a story of overcoming obstacles.

• Is your social, cultural or economic background underrepresented in the field? Show how your experiences will contribute a unique perspective.
• Do you have gaps in your resume or lower-than-ideal grades? Explain the challenges you faced and how you dealt with them.

Don’t focus too heavily on negatives, but use them to highlight your positive qualities. Resilience, resourcefulness and perseverance make you a promising graduate school candidate.

Growing up working class, urban decay becomes depressingly familiar. The sight of a row of abandoned houses does not surprise me, but it continues to bother me. Since high school, I have been determined to pursue a career in urban planning. While people of my background experience the consequences of urban planning decisions first-hand, we are underrepresented in the field itself. Ironically, given my motivation, my economic background has made my studies challenging. I was fortunate enough to be awarded a scholarship for my undergraduate studies, but after graduation I took jobs in unrelated fields to help support my parents. In the three years since, I have not lost my ambition. Now I am keen to resume my studies, and I believe I can bring an invaluable perspective to the table: that of the people most impacted by the decisions of urban planners.

Strategy 3: Demonstrate your knowledge of the field

Especially if you’re applying for a PhD or another research-focused program, it’s a good idea to show your familiarity with the subject and the department. Your personal statement can focus on the area you want to specialize in and reflect on why it matters to you.

• Reflect on the topics or themes that you’ve focused on in your studies. What draws you to them?
• Discuss any academic achievements, influential teachers, or other highlights of your education.
• Talk about the questions you’d like to explore in your research and why you think they’re important.

The personal statement isn’t a research proposal , so don’t go overboard on detail—but it’s a great opportunity to show your enthusiasm for the field and your capacity for original thinking.

In applying for this research program, my intention is to build on the multidisciplinary approach I have taken in my studies so far, combining knowledge from disparate fields of study to better understand psychological concepts and issues. The Media Psychology program stands out to me as the perfect environment for this kind of research, given its researchers’ openness to collaboration across diverse fields. I am impressed by the department’s innovative interdisciplinary projects that focus on the shifting landscape of media and technology, and I hope that my own work can follow a similarly trailblazing approach. More specifically, I want to develop my understanding of the intersection of psychology and media studies, and explore how media psychology theories and methods might be applied to neurodivergent minds. I am interested not only in media psychology but also in psychological disorders, and how the two interact. This is something I touched on during my undergraduate studies and that I’m excited to delve into further.

Strategy 4: Discuss your professional ambitions

Especially if you’re applying for a more professionally-oriented program (such as an MBA), it’s a good idea to focus on concrete goals and how the program will help you achieve them.

• If your career is just getting started, show how your character is suited to the field, and explain how graduate school will help you develop your talents.
• If you have already worked in the profession, show what you’ve achieved so far, and explain how the program will allow you to take the next step.
• If you are planning a career change, explain what has driven this decision and how your existing experience will help you succeed.

Don’t just state the position you want to achieve. You should demonstrate that you’ve put plenty of thought into your career plans and show why you’re well-suited to this profession.

One thing that fascinated me about the field during my undergraduate studies was the sheer number of different elements whose interactions constitute a person’s experience of an urban environment. Any number of factors could transform the scene I described at the beginning: What if there were no bus route? Better community outreach in the neighborhood? Worse law enforcement? More or fewer jobs available in the area? Some of these factors are out of the hands of an urban planner, but without taking them all into consideration, the planner has an incomplete picture of their task. Through further study I hope to develop my understanding of how these disparate elements combine and interact to create the urban environment. I am interested in the social, psychological and political effects our surroundings have on our lives. My studies will allow me to work on projects directly affecting the kinds of working-class urban communities I know well. I believe I can bring my own experiences, as well as my education, to bear upon the problem of improving infrastructure and quality of life in these communities.

Tips for the main body

• Don’t rehash your resume by trying to summarize everything you’ve done so far; the personal statement isn’t about listing your academic or professional experience, but about reflecting, evaluating, and relating it to broader themes.
• Do make your statements into stories: Instead of saying you’re hard-working and self-motivated, write about your internship where you took the initiative to start a new project. Instead of saying you’ve always loved reading, reflect on a novel or poem that changed your perspective.

Your conclusion should bring the focus back to the program and what you hope to get out of it, whether that’s developing practical skills, exploring intellectual questions, or both.

Emphasize the fit with your specific interests, showing why this program would be the best way to achieve your aims.

Strategy 1: What do you want to know?

If you’re applying for a more academic or research-focused program, end on a note of curiosity: what do you hope to learn, and why do you think this is the best place to learn it?

If there are specific classes or faculty members that you’re excited to learn from, this is the place to express your enthusiasm.

Strategy 2: What do you want to do?

If you’re applying for a program that focuses more on professional training, your conclusion can look to your career aspirations: what role do you want to play in society, and why is this program the best choice to help you get there?

Tips for the conclusion

• Don’t summarize what you’ve already said. You have limited space in a personal statement, so use it wisely!
• Do think bigger than yourself: try to express how your individual aspirations relate to your local community, your academic field, or society more broadly. It’s not just about what you’ll get out of graduate school, but about what you’ll be able to give back.

You’ll be expected to do a lot of writing in graduate school, so make a good first impression: leave yourself plenty of time to revise and polish the text.

Your style doesn’t have to be as formal as other kinds of academic writing, but it should be clear, direct and coherent. Make sure that each paragraph flows smoothly from the last, using topic sentences and transitions to create clear connections between each part.

Don’t be afraid to rewrite and restructure as much as necessary. Since you have a lot of freedom in the structure of a personal statement, you can experiment and move information around to see what works best.

Finally, it’s essential to carefully proofread your personal statement and fix any language errors. Before you submit your application, consider investing in professional personal statement editing . For $150, you have the peace of mind that your personal statement is grammatically correct, strong in term of your arguments, and free of awkward mistakes.

A statement of purpose is usually more formal, focusing on your academic or professional goals. It shouldn’t include anything that isn’t directly relevant to the application.

A personal statement can often be more creative. It might tell a story that isn’t directly related to the application, but that shows something about your personality, values, and motivations.

However, both types of document have the same overall goal: to demonstrate your potential as a graduate student and s how why you’re a great match for the program.

The typical length of a personal statement for graduate school applications is between 500 and 1,000 words.

Different programs have different requirements, so always check if there’s a minimum or maximum length and stick to the guidelines. If there is no recommended word count, aim for no more than 1-2 pages.

If you’re applying to multiple graduate school programs, you should tailor your personal statement to each application.

Some applications provide a prompt or question. In this case, you might have to write a new personal statement from scratch: the most important task is to respond to what you have been asked.

If there’s no prompt or guidelines, you can re-use the same idea for your personal statement – but change the details wherever relevant, making sure to emphasize why you’re applying to this specific program.

If the application also includes other essays, such as a statement of purpose , you might have to revise your personal statement to avoid repeating the same information.

If you want to know more about college essays , academic writing , and AI tools , make sure to check out some of our other language articles with explanations, examples, and quizzes.

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Not sure what graduate schools are looking for in a statement of purpose? Looking at successful graduate school statement of purpose samples can help! In this guide, we’ll orient you to what makes a great statement of purpose or letter of intent for graduate school. Then we’ll provide you with four successful statement of purpose examples from our graduate school experts. We’ll also provide analysis of what makes them successful. Finally, we’ll direct you to even more helpful examples that you can find online!

The Graduate School Statement of Purpose: An Overview

A statement of purpose (also called a letter of intent or a research statement) introduces your interests and experience to the admissions committee. For research-focused programs, like most PhDs and many master’s degrees, your statement of purpose will focus primarily on your past research experience and plans. For more professionally-focused graduate programs, your statement of purpose will primarily discuss how your pursuit of this professional program relates to your past experiences, and how you will use the skills from the program in your future career.

A statement of purpose for grad school is also where you sell the admissions committee on why you belong in their program specifically. Why do you fit there, and how does what they offer fit your interests?

What’s in a Great Grad School Statement of Purpose?

Here are the essential elements of a strong graduate school statement of purpose:

Clear Articulation of Goals and Interests

A strong statement of purpose will clearly and specifically lay out your goals in undertaking the program and what you hope to accomplish with the degree. Again, for a research-focused program, this will focus primarily on the research project(s) you want to undertake while you are there. For a more professional program, discuss what interests you within the professional field and what skills/knowledge you hope to gain through the program.

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You should be as specific as possible in discussing what interests you. Use examples of particular phenomena, tools, or situations that you find exciting. If you are vague or say that everything in the field interests you, you run the risk of seeming unfocused or not actually that passionate.

Don’t worry that being too specific will box you into a particular research area or subfield during your entire tenure in graduate school. Your program understands that interests change—they won’t be pulling out your research statement to cross-reference with your dissertation proposal!

Evidence of Past Experience and Success

A great graduate school statement of purpose will also show programs that you have already been successful. They want applicants that will be able to follow through on their research/professional plans!

To this end, you’ll need to provide evidence of how your background qualifies you to pursue this program and your specific interests in the field. You’ll probably discuss your undergraduate studies and any professional experience you have. But be sure to draw on specific, vivid examples.  You might draw on your thesis, major projects you’ve worked on, papers you have written/published, presentations you’ve given, mentors you’ve worked with, and so on. This gives admissions committees concrete evidence that you are qualified to undertake graduate study!

Interest and Fit With the Program

The third essential ingredient to a great statement of purpose is to clearly lay out why you and the program are a good fit. You should be able to identify both specific reasons why your work fits with the program and why the program suits your work/interests! Are there particular professors you’d like to work with? Does the department have a strong tradition in a certain methodology or theory you’re interested in? Is there a particular facet to the curriculum that you’d like to experience?

Showing that you and the program are a match shows that you chose the program thoughtfully and have genuine interest in it. Programs want to admit students who aren’t just passionate about the field. They want students who are genuinely enthused about their specific program and positioned to get the most out of what they have to offer.

Strong Writing

The final essential piece of a strong statement of purpose or letter of intent is strong writing. Writing skills are important for all graduate programs. You’ll need to demonstrate that you can clearly and effectively communicate your ideas in a way that flows logically. Additionally, you should show that you know how to write in a way that is descriptive but concise. A statement of purpose shouldn’t ever be longer than two pages, even without a hard word limit.

Admissions committees for humanities programs may be a little more focused on writing style than admissions officers for STEM programs. But even in quantitative and science-focused fields, written communication skills are an essential part of graduate school. So a strong statement of purpose will always be effectively written. You’ll see this in our statement of purpose for graduate school samples.

Real, Successful Statement of Purpose Samples

In this section, we’ll present four successful graduate school statement of purpose examples from our graduate school experts, along with a brief commentary on each statement. These statements come from a diverse selection of program types to show you how the core essentials of a statement of purpose can be implemented differently for different fields.

Note: identifying information for these statements have been changed—except for example four, which is my statement.

• Statement of Purpose Sample One: Japanese Studies MA

This statement of purpose is notable for its great use of space and its vivid descriptions. The author is able to cram a lot into about a page. She discusses how she came to her two primary research interests (and how they are connected). She integrates this discussion of her interests with information on her past experiences and qualifications for pursuing the course of study. Finally, she includes details on her goals in pursuing the program and components of the program that interest her. Her examples are specific and fleshed-out. There’s a lot very cleverly included in a small amount of page space!

Additionally, the language is very vivid. Phrases like “evocative and visceral” and “steadily unraveling,” are eye-catching and intriguing. They demonstrate that she has the writing skills necessary to pursue both graduate study and her interest in translation.

• Statement of Purpose Sample Two: Music MM

This sample is fairly long, although at 12 point Times New Roman it’s under two pages single-spaced. The length of this statement is partially due to the somewhat expansive nature of the prompt, which asks what role music has played in the applicant’s life “to date.” This invites applicants to speak more about experiences further in the past (in the childhood and teen years) than is typical for a statement of purpose. Given that this is for a master’s degree in music, this is logical; musical study is typically something that is undertaken at a fairly young age.

This statement does an excellent job describing the student’s past experiences with music in great detail. The descriptions of the student’s past compositions and experiences performing new music are particularly vivid and intriguing.

This statement also lays out and elaborates on specific goals the student hopes to pursue through the program, as well as features particular to the program that interest the student (like particular professors).

• Statement of Purpose Sample Three: Economics PhD

One of the first things you’ll likely notice about this statement is that it’s a little on the longer side. However, at 12 point Times New Roman font and single-spaced, it still comes in under 2 pages (excluding references). It makes sense for a PhD statement of purpose sample to be longer than a master’s degree statement of purpose—there’s more to lay out in terms of research interests!

The writing style is fairly straightforward—there’s definitely a stronger focus on delivering content than flashy writing style. As Economics is a more quantitative-focused field, this is fine. But the writing is still well-organized, clear, and error-free.

The writer also gives numerous examples of their past work and experience, and shows off their knowledge of the field through references, which is a nice touch.

• Statement of Purpose Sample Four: History of the Book MA

This is actually my statement of purpose. It was for a program that I got accepted to but did not end up attending, for a Master’s in the History of the Book. You’ll notice that the two essay prompts essentially asked us to split our statement of purpose into two parts: the first prompt asked about our research interests and goals, and the second prompt asked about our relevant experience and qualifications.

I’ll keep my comments on this graduate school statement of purpose sample brief because I’ll do a deep dive on it in the next section. But looking back at my statement of purpose, I do a good job outlining what within the field interests me and clearly laying out how my past experiences have qualified me for the program.

Obviously this statement did its job, since I was accepted to the program. However, if I were to improve this statement, I’d change the cliche beginning  (“since I was a child”) and provide more specificity in what about the program interested me.

Deep Dive Analysis of a Sample Statement of Purpose for Graduate School

Next, we’ll do a paragraph by paragraph analysis of my statement, statement of purpose sample four. I’ll analyze its strengths and suggest ways I could shore up any weaknesses to make it even stronger.

Essay 1: Academic Interests

To refresh, here’s the first prompt: Please give a short statement that describes your academic interests, purpose, objectives and motivation in undertaking this postgraduate study. (max 3500 chars – approx. 500 words)

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Paragraph 1

Since I was a child, my favorite thing has always been a book. Not just for the stories and information they contain, although that is a large part of it. Mostly, I have been fascinated by the concept of book as object—a tangible item whose purpose is to relate intangible ideas and images. Bookbindings and jackets, different editions, the marginalia in a used book—all of these things become part of the individual book and its significance, and are worth study and consideration. Books and their equivalent forms—perfect bound, scrolled, stone tablets, papyrus—have long been an essential part of material culture and are also one of our most significant sources of information about the human historical past. Through both the literal object of the book, the words contained thereon, and its relationship to other books—forms of context, text and intertext—we are able to learn and hopefully manage layers of information with which we would otherwise have no familiarity.

First, the good: this paragraph does a good job introducing my academic interest in the book-as-object, and shows off pre-existing knowledge both of the study of material culture and literary theory. Additionally, the language is engaging: the juxtaposition of “tangible” and “intangible” in the beginning and phrases like “perfect bound, scrolled, stone tablets, papyrus” lend life to the writing and keep the reader engaged.

If I were to go back and improve this paragraph, first, I would absolutely change the first sentence to something less cliche than talking about my childhood. I might try something like “My love of books is a multifaceted thing. I don’t only love them for the stories and….” Second, I would chill out on the em dashes a little bit. Three sets in one paragraph is a little excessive. Finally, I might actually cut this paragraph down slightly to make more room word-wise later in the statement to discuss what specific things about the program interest me.

Paragraph 2

Furthermore, blogs, webcomics, digital archives, e-readers, and even social media sites like tumblr and Facebook have revolutionized the concept of the book by changing how we share and transmit ideas and information, just as the Gutenberg printing press revolutionized the book all those years ago in the fifteenth century. Once again there has been an explosion both in who can send out information and who can receive it.

This paragraph briefly and effectively introduces my other main academic interest: how new technology has changed the concept of the book-as-object. The tie-back to the printing press is a nice touch; it’s a vivid example that shows that I’m aware of important historical moments in book history.

Paragraph 3

I am deeply interested in the preservation of the physical book, as I think it is an important part of human history (not to mention a satisfying sensory experience for the reader). However I am also very concerned with the digitization and organization of information for the modern world such that the book, in all of its forms, stays relevant and easy to access and use. Collections of books, archives, and information as stored in the world’s servers, libraries and museums are essential resources that need to be properly organized and administered to be fully taken advantage of by their audiences. My purpose in applying to the University of Edinburgh’s Material Culture and History of the Book is to gain the skills necessary to keep all forms of the book relevant and functional in an age when information can move more radically than ever before.

This paragraph actually has a focus problem. Since it covers two topics, I should split it into two paragraphs: one on the integration of my two interests, and one on my goals and interests in the program. I could also stand to expand on what features the program has that interest me: professors I’d like to work with, particular aspects of the curriculum, etc.

In spite of these things, however, this paragraph does a good job clearly integrating the two academic interests related to the book I introduced in the first two paragraphs. And the language is still strong —“satisfying sensory experience” is a great phrase. However, I’ve been using the word “information,” a lot; I might try to replace with appropriate synonyms (like “knowledge”) in a couple of places.

Paragraph 4

Additionally, I intend on pursuing a PhD in Library and Information Sciences upon completion of my master’s and I feel that this program while make me uniquely suited to approach library science from a highly academic and interdisciplinary perspective.

This final paragraph offers just quick touch on my future goals beyond the program. It’s typically fine for this to be relatively brief, as it is here, just so long as you can clearly identify some future goals.

Essay 2: Relevant Experience

The second prompt just asked me to describe my relevant knowledge, training, and skills.

As a folklore and mythology student, I have gained a robust understanding of material culture and how it relates to culture as a whole. I have also learned about the transmission of ideas, information, stories and pieces of lore among and between populations, which is an important component of book history. Folklore is also deeply concerned with questions of the literary vs. oral lore and the tendency for text to “canonize” folklore, and yet text can also question or invert canonized versions; along with this my studies in my focus field of religion and storytelling have been deeply concerned with intertextuality. One of my courses was specifically concerned with the Heian-period Japanese novel The Tale of Genji and questions of translation and representation in post-Heian picture scrolls and also modern translations and manga. In addition to broader cultural questions concerned with gender and spirituality both in historical Japan and now, we considered the relationships between different Genji texts and images.

This is a strong, focused paragraph. I relate my academic background in Folklore and Mythology to my interests in studying the book, as well as showing off some of my knowledge in the area. I also chose and elaborated on a strong example (my class on the Tale of Genji ) of my relevant coursework.

I also have work experience that lends itself to the study of the book. After my freshman year of college I interned at the Chicago History Museum. Though I was in the visitor services department I was exposed to the preservation and archival departments of the museum and worked closely with the education department, which sparked my interest in archival collections and how museums present collection information to the public. After my sophomore year of college and into my junior year, I worked at Harvard’s rare books library, Houghton. At Houghton I prepared curated collections for archival storage. These collections were mostly comprised of the personal papers of noteworthy individuals, categorized into alphabetical folders. This experience made me very process-oriented and helped me to understand how collections come together on a holistic basis.

This paragraph also has a clear focus: my past, relevant work experience. Discussing archival collections and presenting information to the public links the interests discussed in my first statement with my qualifications in my second statement. However, if I were to revise this paragraph, I would add some specific examples of the amazing things I worked on and handled at Houghton Library. In that job, I got to touch Oliver Cromwell’s death mask! An interesting example would make this paragraph really pop even more.

Finally, in my current capacity as an education mentor in Allston, a suburb of Boston, I have learned the value of book history and material culture from an educational perspective. As a mentor who designs curriculum for individual students and small groups, I have learned to highly value clearly organized and useful educational resources such as websites, iPad apps, and books as tools for learning. By managing and organizing collections in a way that makes sense we are making information accessible to those who need it.

This final paragraph discusses my current (at the time) work experience in education and how that ties into my interest in the history of the book. It’s an intriguing connection and also harkens back to my discussion of information availability in the paragraph three of the first statement. Again, if I were to amp up this statement even more, I might include a specific example of a book-based (or book technology-based) project I did with one of my students. I worked on things like bookbinding and making “illuminated manuscripts” with some of my students; those would be interesting examples here.

This statement is split into two parts by virtue of the two-prompt format. However, if I were to integrate all of this information into one unified statement of purpose, I would probably briefly introduce my research interests, go in-depth on my background, then circle back around to speak more about my personal interests and goals and what intrigues me about the program. There’s not really one correct way to structure a statement of purpose just so long as it flows well and paragraphs are structured in a logical way: one topic per paragraph, with a clear topic and concluding sentence.

More Statement of Purpose Examples

We’ve provided you with four great graduate school statement of purpose examples from our graduate school experts. However, if you’re looking for more, there are other sample letters of intent and statements of purpose for graduate school online. We’ve rounded up the best ones here, along with some strengths and weaknesses about each example.

Majortests Statement of Purpose Sample

This is a fairly straightforward, clearly written statement of purpose sample for a biology program. It includes useful commentary after each paragraph about what this statement of purpose is accomplishing.

• This statement of purpose sample is well-organized, with clear topic sentences and points made in each paragraph.
• The student clearly identifies what interests her about the program.
• The student proactively addresses questions about why she hasn’t gone directly to graduate school, and frames her professional research experience as a positive thing.
• She gives a tiny bit of color about her personality in a relevant way by discussing her involvement with the Natural History Society.
• In general, discussing high school interests is too far back in time unless the anecdote is very interesting or unusual. The detail about The Theory of Evolution is intriguing; the information about the high school teacher seems irrelevant. The student should have condensed this paragraph into a sentence or two.
• While this statement is cogently written and makes the candidate sound competent and well-qualified, it’s not exactly the most scintillating piece of writing out there. Some of the constructions are a little awkward or cliche. For example, the “many people have asked me” sentence followed by “the answer is” is a little bit clunky. This is probably fine for a STEM program. But just be aware that this statement is not a paragon of writing style.

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UC Berkeley History Statement of Purpose Sample

This is a graduate school statement of purpose example from the UC Berkeley History department’s PhD program, with annotations from a professor as to why it’s a successful statement.

• The author is able to very clearly and articulately lay out her research interests and link them to past work she has successfully completed, namely, her thesis.
• She is able to identify several things about the program and Berkeley that indicate why it is a good fit for her research interests.
• She addresses the time she spent away from school and frames it as a positive, emphasizing that her use of time was well-considered and productive.
• Her writing is very vivid, with excellent word choice and great imagery.

While very well-written and engaging, this sample statement of purpose for graduate school is a little bit on the long side! It’s a little over two single-spaced pages, which is definitely pushing the limits of acceptable length. Try to keep yours at 2 pages or less. Some of the information on the thesis (which comprises over half of the statement of purpose) could be condensed to bring it down to two pages.

Pharmacy Residency Letter of Intent Sample

This is not technically a sample letter of intent for graduate school because it’s actually for a pharmacy residency program. However, this example still provides illumination as to what makes a decent graduate school letter of intent sample.

• This is a serviceable letter of intent: the writer clearly lays out their own goals within the field of pharmacy, what qualifications they have and how they’ve arrived at their interests, and how the program fits their needs.
• The writing is clearly structured and well-organized.
• The main weakness is that some of the writer’s statements come across as fairly generic. For example, “The PGY-1 Residency Program at UO Hospitals will provide me with the opportunity to further develop my clinical knowledge, critical thinking, teaching, research, and leadership skills” is a generic statement that could apply to any residency program. A punchier, more program-specific conclusion would have amped up this letter.
• While the writer does a decent job providing examples of their activities, like working as a tutor and attending the APhA conference, more specificity and detail in these examples would make the statement more memorable.
• There’s a typo in the last paragraph —a “to” that doesn’t belong! This is an unprofessional blip in an otherwise solid letter. Read you own letter of intent aloud to avoid this!

NIU Bad Statement of Purpose Example

This is an ineffective graduate school statement of purpose example, with annotations on why it doesn’t work.

As you might imagine, the main strength in this document is as an example of what not to do. Otherwise, there is little to recommend it.

• The annotations quite clearly detail the weaknesses of this statement. So I won’t address them exhaustively except to point out that this statement of purpose fails at both content and style. The author includes irrelevant anecdotes and lists without offering a decisive picture of interests or any particular insight into the field. Additionally, the statement is riddled with grammatical mistakes, awkward sentence structures, and strange acronyms.
• You’ll note that the commentary advises you to “never start with a quote.” I agree that you should never start with a freestanding quote as in this example. However, I do think starting with a quote is acceptable in cases like the Berkeley history example above, where the quote is brief and then directly linked to the research interest.

Graduate School Statement of Purpose Examples: 4 Key Points

Graduate programs ask for statement of purpose to hear about your interests and goals and why you think you and the program would be a good fit.

There are four key elements to a successful statement of purpose:

• A clear articulation of your goals and interests
• Evidence of past experiences and success
• Interest and fit with the program
• Strong writing

We’ve provided you with four successful statement of purpose samples from our graduate school experts!

We also provided additional statement of purpose samples (and a sample letter of intent) for graduate school from other sources on the internet. Now you have all kinds of guidance!

What’s Next?

If you’re looking for more information on graduate school , see our guide to what makes a good GPA for grad school .

Not sure if you need to take the GRE ? See if you can get into graduate school without GRE scores .

Want more information about the GRE? We can help you figure out when to take the GRE , how to make a GRE study plan , and how to improve your GRE score .

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Author: Ellen McCammon

Ellen is a public health graduate student and education expert. She has extensive experience mentoring students of all ages to reach their goals and in-depth knowledge on a variety of health topics. View all posts by Ellen McCammon

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Goal Statement, Essay Example

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In my academic career to date, I have achieved great success in my path towards a Bachelor of Science in Nursing degree. I have acquired important knowledge and skills that will enable me to provide support, guidance, and encouragement to my patients in a positive manner to ensure that their clinical and emotional needs are met on a consistent basis. I am inspired by the work that nurses perform and strive to achieve similar goals and objectives in my own future career. It is important to address the role that nurses play in shaping outcomes and in providing a framework for growth and change for patients in need of care. As a professional nurse, I will strive to be effective in the work that I perform and support the development of new perspectives to encourage positive patient outcomes to fulfill the objectives of the nursing mission and vision.

As I am currently in my junior year, I am focusing on finishing my BSN degree and in taking the steps that are required to graduate and pursue a Master’s Degree to become a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner. I continue to utilize my core strengths as a means of establishing a framework for achievement in my academic studies. I am an active member of the National Honor Society and have earned a 3.5 GPA to date. These efforts have been instrumental in my ability to accomplish important milestones as a nursing student, and I continue to seek new forms of knowledge on a continuous basis. I believe that knowledge is the cornerstone of nursing practice and therefore, I must continue to strive to achieve new forms of knowledge in each course that I pursue. I believe that a strong educational foundation must serve as the driving framework for achieving personal goals and objectives in nursing practice that contribute to the success of each and every task that is undertaken.

My personal objectives as a professional nurse include enabling my patients to pursue a path to improved health and wellbeing on a daily basis. This is a critical component of nursing practice and supports the development of new perspectives in order to ensure that patient outcomes are achieved in a consistent manner. I believe that in the role of professional nurse, I will demonstrate my true passion and dedication to my patients through my pursuit of a successful career path that includes the development of new approaches to nursing care and treatment that are not only effective, but that also provide an example for other nurses to follow as they treat their patients. In this role, I will strive to achieve optimal success and achievement with my patients as they experience healing in a compassionate work environment. This is a critical component of success in nursing practice and supports the continued growth and development of new perspectives to ensure that patient care needs are met in a timely manner at all times.

Finally, I will demonstrate compassion and caring for all patients throughout their experiences. This will be best achieved through the continued growth and development of new perspectives to ensure that their outcomes are favorable and that their plans of care are appropriate for their specific needs. This is a critical component of nursing practice and supports my objectives as a nurse striving for success and achievement in this role. Optimal health and wellbeing are my primary objectives in the role of professional nurse; therefore, I will take the steps that are necessary to achieve these outcomes through the development of positive care and treatment experiences at all levels of nursing practice towards the achievement of success in the nursing career.

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